Pitt Pulls Quick 180 On SOTU

If you want WILLIAM RIVERS Pitt to change his mind, then just wait a minute. This happened stunningly fast last night when Pitt went from happily hyping a SOTU that he hadn't even seen yet to angrily slamming it less than 4 hours later. Here is Pitt in SOTU happy hype mode, I am a total sucker for the annual State of the Union speech at 7:59 P.M. to angrily denouncing it at 10:38 P.M. with his vulgar F*CK. This quick turnaround by Pitt is not too surprising since he has a long history of self-recantation to the extent that our Charles Henrickson even wrote a parody song about it so before going further, we serenade Pitt with his theme song:

SELF-RECANTED EVENING
Tune: "Some Enchanted Evening"

Self-recanted evening,
When you see the flip-flops,
You may see where Pitt stops
Across the DUmmieland.
And somehow you know,
You know even then,
That sometime you'll see him
Recant once again.

Self-aggrandized weaving,
Bloviating windbag,
Going where the wind blows,
Not knowing where to stand.
He'll write to the left--
That's left to go right--
Will's so busy dancing,
He can't sleep at night.

Who can explain Pitt?
Who can tell you why?
Will gives two versions,
Neither one can fly.

Some fantastic FReeping!
Someone may be laughing,
You may hear the laughing
Among the DUFU fans.
And night after night,
When we go to bed,
That sound is our laughter--
Will Pitt's in our thread!

Once we have DUFUed
Will Pitt's swing and miss,
Then he'll discover
He can't recant this!]

So let us watch WILLIAM RIVERS PITT happily hype a State Of The Union speech he hasn't even seen yet only to angrily denounce it a couple of hours later in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, who fell asleep on his couch only a couple of sentences into the SOTU, is in the [barackets]:

I am a total sucker for the annual State of the Union speech.

[You sure are, Pitt, as we shall see in only a couple of hours.]

Total sucker.

[You bet. You hype a speech you have yet to even see only to have to eat crow a couple of hours later when you angrily DENOUNCE it.]

I know I know I know I know, it's a show, it's TV, it is pretty words once again, and words are wind...I know, OK, so shaddap and let me enjoy the spectacle.

[No, no, Pitt. Continue drooling like an idiot over the Obama speech you have yet to see only to be forced into a humiliating act of self-recantation only a couple of hours later. The unintended humor of that situation is priceless.]

 Especially when the guy on the stump knows how to get it done. Watching the W. Bush SOTU speeches was like getting beaten with sticks. Watching Clinton was like watching art in creation, most of the time anyway. Watching Bush Sr. was like watching pudding watch pudding. Watching Reagan was agony, but always a good show, even towards the end, because that's what he did.

[The 10:38 PM Pitt is cringing at these words of the 7:59 PM Sucker Pitt.]

President Obama knows how to get it done...and since it sounds like he's going to be flipping a few rhetorical daggers at the *ahem* legacy of Ronald Reagan tonight, the looks on the faces of the meth-addled House GOP howler monkeys will be worth the price of admission right there.

[Pitt is going to want to hit the meth hard when he finds out the SOTU surprise inn store for him.]

...and maybe, just maybe, if he parks it deep enough tonight, and I mean over the wall and the water tank and far into the wheat field...maybe he can penetrate the "both sides are to blame" gibberish peddled by the "news media" and shake this shit up.

[Oh, he parks it alright, Pitt. Right up your butt.]

Yeah, I know, that's asking a lot. But I can dream.

[Only an hour away from turning into a nightmare for Pitt.]

It's a show. Enjoy it. The GOP will be collectively looking like they're sucking on lemons if St. Ronald takes a beating tonight.

[They won't be sucking on lemons but you will definitely be eating crow. And now we quickly review the DUmmie responses on this thread but the important point is that Pitt has established how great he "knows" the SOTU speech will be before even seeing it...]

Great idea for a drinking game, thanks! Every time Obama tells us that Liberals must share in the blame, we drink.

[You think Pitt needs that lame excuse to drink?]

I can't imagine not watching. Even though I might disagree with what he is saying, the delicious knowledge that his mere presence is infuriating to many in that chamber makes this must-see TV. Martini time

[It will be infuriating...but to Pitt. Bukowski's time.]

I'm hoping that President Obama delivers a message of Truth.

["If you like your health insurance plan, you can keep it. PERIOD." Okay, time now to join the 10:38 PM Pitt with a completely different bummed out attitude...]

F*ck.

[That was quick. Proceed with your self-recantation...]

He stood that soldier up at the end, the man with the blasted head and the scarred life, with the visible dent in his skull, who will never ever be even remotely close to the same again because of the ten deployments we sent him off to so someone he'll never meet can make a lot of money, and gave that man his reward: a standing ovation from the worst roomful of people on the skin of the Earth... 

  ...followed by this burbled bit of spitup pabulum: "Sometimes we make mistakes." WOW DUDE. DEEP.

[Did he "park" it deep enough for you?]

Yeah. That happened. On national television. 

  That guy deserves better than a star turn in the parliament of whores, he deserves better than "Oops" from his Commander in Chief, and speaking of the boss, that guy deserves better than to be a prop in a passion play about how everything is awesome, and the last 13 years never happened.

[When do YOU say "Oops" Pitt for prematurely praising a speech you hadn't even heard?]

I am sure the to-the-knife Obama defenders out there will seethe and howl upon reading this. Whatever, man. That was one of the more despicable displays I have ever had the misfortune to witness. He had the opportunity to do more than use a blasted, shattered soldier as a prop in a ZOMG HOW AWESOME IS AMERICA I MEAN TOTALLY montage, to maybe bring home some truths about actions and consequences...and he went for the easy applause line and the "Awwwww" moment. 

  You say "Awwwww" at puppies and babies. You don't say "Awwww" at soldiers victimized by ruined policy deployed by a ruined country...and if you have half a conscience, you make note of that on the largest stage with the biggest microphone in the world. Another missed opportunity in what has become a truly impressive string of missed opportunities. Yeah, the SOTU is a show. That does not mean it has to be utterly meaningless, and it certainly does not mean that it has to be grossly exploitative.

[From knocking out of the ball park to being utterly meaningless. Gee, Pitt, maybe you shoupld wait to hear a speech before hyping it in advance and then turning yourself into a FOOL yet again.]

Maybe I'll feel different tomorrow upon review. I doubt it. I am sick to my stomach.

[You feel even sicker to your stomach when the booze wears off and you realize just how much of a mockery you made of yourself. And now on to the other DUmmies, some of whom correctly SLAM Pitt's idiocy...  ]



Wow, one of the most irrational take aways from any speech ever.

[Most irrational take away in the past 24 business hours.]

Dennis Rodman is seeking help for his drinking problem, I heard somewhere.

[Did you hear somewhere if Pitt is seeking similar help?]

FU right back, you fact-deprived fool.

[That was Pitt replying to DUmmie mrchips whose message was "hidden by jury decision." It sounds like Pitt by that point had been hitting the bottle hard. He will hit it even harder after he wakes up to realize what a complete fool he made of himself.]

Claimant Change: "DUmmie, It's Cold Outside"

Just as it's embarrassing now for the DUmmies to use the term "Obamacare," and so now they just call it the "ACA," so also has it become embarrassing to say "global warming." Since the globe isn't all that warm these days, now the preferred term is "climate change." That can cover just about anything. And that way the facts can't get in the way of their global whining. Witness this THREAD by DUmmie kentuck, "If you believe in global climate change, do you believe the earth is getting warmer or colder?"

But before we get to that thread, let's try to sing some sense into your typical deep-freeze-denying DUmmie. Click the music link and sing along!

DUMMIE, IT'S COLD OUTSIDE
Tune: "Baby, It's Cold Outside"

It's warmer each day
(But, DUmmie, it's cold outside)
It must go away
(But, DUmmie, it's cold outside)
This warming has been
(But lately a huge drop in)
Our greatest vice
(Just feel your hands, they're just like ice)

Oh, what will it take to turn us
(Wait while I check the furnace)
And wake us to the truth we ignore
(Listen to the fireplace roar)
The sunbeams will start to burn us
(See how I crank the furnace)
Well, that is what I heard from Al Gore
(Put some blankets down at the door)

The experts all think--
(I'm seeing a St. Bernard)
Say, what's that ice rink?
(No rink, that's just your back yard)
I wish I knew how
(There's ice on the furnace now)
To break the spell
(Just take a chance, I wouldn't tell)

I ought to say it's no colder
(Don't wanna get a cold shoulder)
At least I'm gonna say "climate change"
(Then you make the facts rearrange)

I really can't say
(DUmmie, don't hold out)
Uh, that it's cold outside
(DUmmie, it's cold outside) . . .

I simply must know
(Yo, DUmmie, it's cold outside)
How we got so much snow
('Cause, DUmmie, it's cold outside)
It's hard to combine
(Eight inches--no, make it nine)
Snow, ice, and warm
(Look out the window at that storm)

"You're sinister and seditious!"
(Gosh, you libs are suspicious)
Would DU even show me the door?
(Make waves and make the tolerant sore)
My lib'ral friends can be vicious
(Ooh, you libs are malicious)
And what would I say to Al Gore?
(Never such a blowhard or bore)

I'm covered with snow
(See, DUmmie, I told you so)
It's 20 below
(With ten more degrees to go)
It's really been cold
(Wind chill, something to behold)
But I cannot--
(How can you claim it's getting hot?)

They're gonna call me a traitor
(But lib'rals can't be haters)
At least they will call me a troll
(If you're caught, then just be a mole)

I really can't say
(Get over that holdout) . . .

Uh, but it's cold outside!
(DUmmie, it's cold outside!)

And now on to DUmmies in denial, in Bolsheshivering Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, the wag tailoring the doggerel, Charles Henrickson, looking at about a foot of global warming out my below-zero window, is in the [brackets]:

If you believe in global climate change. . . .

[Global "climate change"?? What happened to global "warming," DUmmie kentuck?]

do you believe the earth is getting warmer or colder?

[Oh, both of course! That way we've got all our bases covered! Hot, cold--who cares? It's change, isn't it?]

[The DUmmies reply . . .]

Is this trying to place Climate change in woo category?

["Woo" is the favored term DU jour for hokum, baloney, BS.]

I hope not...

[Watch it, DUmmie kentuck! DUmmie PowerToThePeople will report you to the powers that be if you dare to question climate change! This is your global warning!]

My answer - Warmer.

[Because I say so!]

It isn't a matter of belief.

[But, but, I BELIEEEEEEEVE!!!!!!!!!!]

The evidence says climate change is happening. . . .

[It's changed, apparently, from global warming to global cooling.]

weather is not climate.

[Has nothing to do with it!]

Climate change means more energy is kept in the atmosphere.

[Climate change means more energy is expended in DUmmieland trying to defend it.]

Many different kinds of weather events occur across the earth. Cold and hot, wet and dry, stormy and calm.

[See? Climate change! And it's our fault! Let's all feel guilty! BAD humans! BAD!!]

The way human induced warming and climate change works is that these occurrences get more extreme and more frequent.

[And what makes it especially tricky is that there's no way to prove it's human-induced! Or that it can be human-reversed! It's insidious, this climate-change stuff!]

There is also the way that polar warming can affect ocean currents . . .

[As shown on a recent documentary on Current TV. No, wait, Al Gore sold that to Al Jazeera, didn't he? Dang!]

and the jet stream . . .

[In which Algore flies his big, fuel-burning jet all across the globe.]

along with the way air moves from land to sea and vice versa.

[Before, it didn't used to do that.]

These occurrences are causing the major problems experienced nowadays across the world.

[Including that big ACA rollout snafu.]

each problem is different . . .

[But it all adds up to one thing: Climate change.]

We see wider and stronger hurricanes. . . .

[Recent news report: "The 2013 Atlantic hurricane season was the first Atlantic hurricane season since 1994 to end with no major hurricanes, and the first since 1968 to feature no storms of at least category 2 intensity."]

i would think regionally cold winters would be a result of arctic melting. hotter summer means more melting means more cold water entering the oceans means cold winter...?...not a scientist.

[I gathered that.]

Ok, let me try to untangle this for you. . . .

[Oh, alright now! DUmmie nadinbrzezinski--aka Know-it-all Nadin, the World's Foremost Authority--steps in to untangle all this for us. Go ahead, Nadin, please enlighten us.]

That is part of what was predicted.

[Nadin TOLD us this would happen. But did we listen to her? No! As usual. And now we're paying the price.]

Weather and climate are two different critters.

[There's a crittercal difference!]

Gravity has nothing to do with this. . . .

[Rule that right out.]

While we are getting pulled in, the planet has a speed and centrifugal force is in perfect balance, keeping the planet at a stable orbit.

[I did not know that, Nadin. I thought we were getting sucked into the sun, and that's why it's getting warmer. Climate-wise, I mean. Not talking about the weather.]

Yes the orbit is not completely circular. . . .

[You're kidding! Somebody call Ripley!]

so during the winter it is closer to the sun. . . .

[That's why it's so warm right now.]

In the scales of humans we will not even notice, without advanced equipment.

[We need the good rig.]

There are literally oodles of research on this.

[Literal oodles. Check the google on this, like Nadin does.]

[Thank you, Nadin, you have cleared it all up. We are not worthy.]

The distance between the earth and the sun is not changing . . .

[Whew! I'm so glad! Thanks, DUmmie Salviati, for confirming what Nadin just told us--although, of course, if Nadin says it, it's got to be true!]

with the caveat that if the big rip theory is true, then eventually in the far far flung future, the solar system, the earth, and our very atoms will be ripped apart, but if this were to be the case, we would start to see it's effects locally only a short time before our doom.

[Ruh roh. Now I'm worried.]

Isn't that caveat, IIRC, ten BILLION into the future? I am going from memory here.

[Nadin doesn't need the google on THAT one! Ten billion it is! Start stocking up your fallout shelter!]

Twenty actually. . . .

[Oh, thanks for that, DUmmie Salviati, I can relax a bit. But not too much.]

No worries, the sun will be an ex star by then anyhow.

[Nadin assures Salviati that she needed no correction. The ex-star business makes it a moot point.]

Holy sh*t Nadin. That was pretty much exactly right. Close enough anyway. I can't tell you how tickled I am to be able to say that about one of your posts. Nice job.

[Hee, hee! I detect a note of sarcasm there, DUmmie tkmorris! Say, you aren't one of them bullies, are you? If so, TO THE IGGY LIST WITH YOU!]

Your concepts of astronomy are a bit off. For one, the earth is always falling toward the sun.

[Make up your mind! I've got to know if it's worth planning my vacation!]

the hydrologic cycle is a major mechanism for restributing heat in the atmosphere.

[The lackologic cycle is a major mechanism for redistributing hot air in DUmmieland.]

Like magnetism and gravity, it is not something you get to believe in or not. . . . It bugs the sh*t outta me that "do you believe in evolution", or "do you believe in global warming" are perfectly legitimate questions to ask. . . .

[I believe in the evolution of "global warming" to "climate change."]

No need to discuss it any further. It is written is stone.

[DUmmie kentuck knows when he's been silenced. And if he keeps on, it will be written in tombstone.]

- - - - - - - - - -

UPDATE:

There's been more activity on this thread since we last spoke, enough to warrant a "Part Two" mini-DUFU.

The first comment comes from Nadin:

it is getting warmer. . . . increasing energy . . . a heating atmosphere. That would be climactic change.

["Climactic" change. Nadin has noticed increasing energy, she's heating up, and she's about to reach a climax.]

Scientific consensus by the vast majority of scinentiests indicates global warming caused by human.

[Alright, which one of you did it? We're not leaving this room until somebody fesses up. The scinentiests want to know.]

Before the rise of the AGW paradigm the 80s/90s, variations in solar activity were generally considered as the most influential factor on climate change. IMO, AGW is exaggerated or insignificant at the best. The certainty is fake and bullied. It's not a conspiracy. It's simply profiteering and ironically, no significant reductions in CO2 emissions are achieved by any proposed or implemented policy.

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

soon enough, we'll be gone.

[Promise?]

another race of (presumably) intelligent beings will take our place.

[Intelligent beings to replace the DUmmies. I like it!]

who gives a sh*t, we are not doing jack about it anyhow.

[But, but, I thought Obamassiah was going to heal the oceans!

Well, he's got three more years to go, and I'm sure it's on his "To Do" list.]

The climate on earth has always been changing and always will change.
 
[NO! NO! THIS CANNOT BE! THE CLIMATE MUST ALWAYS STAY EXACTLY THE SAME! I CAN'T HEEEEAAAAR YOUUUU!!!!!!! LALALALALA. . . . .]

Definitely a believer in climate change. Whether colder or warmer, I'm still not real sure of. But yeah...there's something weird going on.

[DUmmie pipi_k, you've convinced me. The evidence you present is overwhelming. I bow to your brilliance.]

Pie-eyed Poster Pitt raises many glasses

New Year's Eve for William Rivers Pitt is like All You Can Eat Night at Golden Corral for Michael Moore: Just another night. Nothing special. You see, Pitt is known to bend the old elbow to all hours of the day and night in honor of, well, just about anything. The sun coming up in the morning. An overtime loss by the Boston Bruins. (Hey, it's one point.) Whatever. Any excuse will do.

But on New Year's Eve, when all the amateurs get in on the act, William will use the occasion to raise many a glass, in honor of every prog cause that will win him applause from his fellow DUmmies. Thus this THREAD by Mr. Pitt, "Tonight, I raise a glass to many upon many, and to many more again."

Leave it to Wee Willie, though, to stir up a hornet's nest, even when he's in "nice drunk" mode. As we shall see.

So let us now travel back in time to the year 2013--actually, to a mere 24 hour-hours ago--and let's hear from Willie and the Pour Boys, in Killian's Irish Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, wondering how DUFU mascot Li'l Beaver rang in the New Year, is in the [brackets]:

Tonight, I raise a glass to many upon many, and to many more again.

[OK, gang, let's see if you can keep track of just how many glasses William ends up raising. Get out your abacus.]

I raise a glass to those who ran to the sound and the smoke and the screams and the blood on Boylston Street in Boston, to do what they could.

[By the way, William, where did YOU run to? That's right, in 2013 you ran to New Hampshire, abandoning the City of Boston, fleeing the Communistwealth of Taxachusetts, to escape to the lily-white woods and lower taxes of your neighbor to the north, and to move closer to Mumsy. How white of you.]

I raise a glass to those who survived, and to those who did not. I raise a glass to those with a hole in their life. . . .

[Three more glasses. Where does he put it all? I think Pitt must have a hole in his leg.]

I raise a glass to you who have gone to war. . . . To you, I raise a glass.

[Not sure, but I think that counts as one glass.]

I raise a glass to every man and woman who wants to work but cannot find employment or get assistance. . . .

[And to every man and woman who does not want to work but does get assistance--well, I think that covers most of DUmmieland, including Pitt.]

I raise a glass to you, and wish you a better year than the one you have endured.

[Will the Shill, I do not foresee a better year for your Democrat Party come this November.  In fact, the only thing you may be raising then is a white flag.]

I raise a glass to the healers, the helpers, the activists arrested trying to defend the right to vote. . . .

[VOTER VERIFIED PAPER BALLOTS! RAISE A GLASS FOR ANDY!]

the right not to be poisoned by a pipeline or a fracking field. . . .

[The right to pay $5.00 a gallon for gasoline. . . .]

the right to smoke a joint. . . .

[Weed Willie invokes a doobious right.]

I raise a glass to you who Occupies. . . .

[From the comfort of his Barcalounger, Slacktivist Will salutes the Occupests, even though he himself never could find the time to get out there and actually Occupy with them.]

I raise a glass to each and every man and woman who has fought for, and achieved, the right to marry whoever the damn hell they please.

["The damn hell." Sounds like a Freudian slip.]

I raise a glass to love in all of its forms. . . .

[To all Fifty Shades of Gay.]

I raise a glass to all those who wait behind the invisible bars . . .

[. . . while I go into all the visible bars.]

I raise a glass to the not-too-distant-future. . . .

[Insert obligatory "24 business hours" joke here.]

I raise a glass to those who have died before the barrel of a gun, to those who have been maimed by a gun, to those who have lost someone to a gun, and to those who fight every day to try and stop the bloody avalanche of death by gun. . . .

[What about those who fight to defend our constitutional right to keep and bear arms? Don't they get a glass raised to them? . . . {crickets} ]

I raise a glass to Truthout. . . . The organization I work for. . . .

["Work"??]

my gratitude at being able to participate in that is fathomless and bottomless.

[Since it makes me look like I'm not jobless.]

I raise a glass to you, DU, individually and collectively, to my online home for twelve years and counting.

[Will didn't have this line in his original post, but he must have figured, since he mentioned Truthout, he ought to mention the DUmp, or else the natives would get restless. Plus, it gave him a reason to raise another glass. What are we up to now? I've lost count.]

I raise a glass to you, America. . . .

[Except to all you rethuglicans and teabaggers out there in Jesusland. You can go suck an egg.]

I raise a glass to my wife, and to my daughter, and to my mother, and to my friends. . . .

["Friends"?? You has some?? Also, William, your daughter is, like, what, one year old? You want her to imbibe that young??]

without whom I would quite simply be lost.
[All that beer, it's easy to get lost, I imagine.]

I raise a glass, and hold you close, and wish for you the best of all possible New Years. With all of my love, William Rivers Pitt

[Awww, that's sweet, William. Back atcha. By the way, how many glasses exactly have you raised so far? Somewhere in the 40s, no?]

[And now let's hear from your fawning admirers . . .]

You've said it all!

[A polite way of saying Pitt goes on and on and on. . . .]

That's a wonderful post! Hear, hear!

[It's a wonderful laff! Har, har!]

I second the toast!

[All in favor, raise your ninth glass.]

Happy New Year, Mr. Pitt. . . .

[And many hoppy returns.]

That's a lot of glasses.

[Hee! Hee! And I raise a glass to you, DUmmie Common Sense Party! Are you keeping score at home?]

Aw, sh*t Will.

[I think Will will need to tend to another bodily function first.]

raising my glass to you William my sweet

[And THAT'S what this post by Pitt is really all about, i.e., garnering applause and praise for Mr. Pitt. Whatever Will posts, whenever he posts, it's always about Will.]

I raise a glass to all our relatives, friends and pets that are no longer here.

[Like DUmmie DainBramaged. Why is he no longer here? Where's he been hiding these past four months? He seems just a remote memory. Hmmm. . . .]

sniff, sniff

[Is that you, Nadin?]

and a glass please for the women stranded with no clinic access. Forced to bear children because fake-religion zealots have taken control of many red state governments. Why did you forget them? . . . It's good to be inclusive, so please stop forgetting about half of the people.

[Ruh roh. DUmmie BlancheSplanchnik is not pleased with Mr. Pitt. Careful, Blanche, remember what William the Conqueror did to DUmmie bobbolink: Slapped her down so fast it made her head spin in the back of her Buick. Willie likes to wage his own War on Women.]

Next year, you write the toast.

[Oooh, burn! Way to go, Will! Stand your ground! Don't let any female of the species push you around! You probably get enough of that at home.]

I'm sorry.....did I offend? You sound mad. . . .

[U mad bro?]

Offended? I'm not the one tearing up a perfectly civil thread.

[That would be YOU, lady! Why don't you shut your piehole?]

I dashed this off in a few minutes.

[Yeah, right, Will. You can't write your grocery list in less than an hour.]

My apologies if every single category of people who struggled in 2013 was inadvertently not included. The toast would have been longer than Lent.

[Longer than a sealed indictment.]

Like I said, feel free to write your own. Happy New Year.

[In other words, BUZZ OFF! Definitely out of "nice drunk" mode now.]

you sound mad.

[Blanche, I think you're on to something.]

You are certainly allowed to disagree and be pissed at me.

[After 47 beers, Pitt is just pissed, period.]

See my edit

[Wha--WHAA??? Don't tell me, Will, you BACKED DOWN? You backed down to a woman?  What is WITH you, man??]

[Yes, friends, William pulled another Self-Recanted Evening. He bowed to Blanche and put in a paragraph about the gals, as follows . . .]

I raise a glass to every woman everywhere who pushed back against trans-vaginal ultrasounds . . . the Bronze-Age morality of modern white men. . . .

[Blah, blah, blah. A "protect your lady parts from those mean rethuglicans" paragraph. You're pandering, Will, you're pandering. Bowing to pressure, that's not like you. . . . Wait a minute. It is.]

thank you!!

[Blanche approves.]

(((hug))) Thanks for the proper poke.

[Will is always up for a hug and a poke.]

This needs to go viral.

[So tempting. But no.]

Will, this may be the best thing you've ever written.

[Damning with faint prose.]

And I raise a glass to you, WilliamPitt...For this great toast and for all your wonderful posts.

[Pitt's a Post Toastee!]

I raise my glass to William Rivers Pitt. . . .

[Everybody's sauced now.]

Raising my glass of iced tea. . . .

[LOUSY ICED TEABAGGER!!!]

You gonna get sloppy drunk tonight, my friend!

[So what's new?]

Oh! Mr. Pitt - Can you turn a phrase!

[Answer: No, not really. This Pitt post was a parade example of a hackneyed DUmmieland device, namely, parallel-construction prolixity: "I raise a glass," "I raise a glass," "I raise a glass," ad nauseam (literally).]

Let us raise a glass tonight to William Rivers Pitt. . . .

[The goal has been reached.]