Sunday, April 29, 2012

DUmmies Bemoan The Economy




I'mmmmm BAAAAAAAACK!!! I had a new cast put on my hand last week that allowed three free fingers on my right hand. After a few days of getting used to it, I can now do a sort of Django Rhinehart method of typing. Complete cast comes off on June 4 and hopefully my pinkie won't be sticking out at an odd angle.

Anyway, the DUmmies do not disappoint in their idiocy. Right now they are gripping about the lousy economy as you can see in this THREAD, "I realized tonight that America's 99% are f*cked for years to come." Excuse me but who has been president for the past three years, two of those years with large Democrat majorities in Congress. So after the "shovel ready" stimulus plan completely failed, the DUmmies are whinining about the bleak economic future. So let us now watch the DUmmies inadvertently give us more reasons to remove the Bamster from office in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, developing a new appreciation for a certain 3-fingered gypsy, is in the [brackets]:

I realized tonight that America's 99% are f*cked for years to come

[OBAMA 2012.]

I was listening to Tavis Smiley in the car. He was interviewing folks who'd been jobless for years. Some homeless at times. People who had good jobs and good lives previously, but now they're in dire straights. America has changed. 

[The change happened in November 2008.]

And it struck me like lightning that here's no light visible at the end of this tunnel. One political party is calling for austerity against the 99%. Our other political party is calling for austerity against the 99% while throwing us a few little treats. "Free" trade, more bank deregulation, and civil liberties down the drain. Citizen's United. Avarice, cowardice, and incompetence. 

[Among those little treats are even more hilarious DUFU editions. Enjoy!]

Poverty, homelessness and hunger are increasing, increasing. Meanwhile, the wealthy grow wealthier as they suck what little bits are left to suck from the rest of us. No help on the horizon, sorry. 

[Hmmm... And WHO is president? I can't seem to recall.]

I hope we get past this, but it will take a long while. Not fun to think about: but here we are. 

[And yet no doubt as to who DUmmie MannyGoldstein will be voting for this November. And now on to the other clueless DUmmies...]

There is a lack of will thus far to do what must be done. But wealth can be expropriated\confiscated through higher taxes on the wealthy and stiffer inheritance taxes. What has been lacking until now is the will to see things through. 

[The solution is to go the full Bolshevik.]

We elect people to do the job. Then they abandon us. Frustrating. 

[So WHO did you elect in 2008?]

As far as I can tell we will be in this mode for many many years. Japan has been here for 20+ and nothing has really improved for them. If we are lucky, we'll just trundle along like this for a couple decades. If not, we will have a complete economic collapse. 

[Spaketh the DUmmie sure to vote for The Bamster again.]

I feel really lucky to have the President we have. We need to get behind him and roll up our own freaking sleeves rather than just complaining about him not doing enough. As you so ably point out in this thread, he's already done a lot. If we just sit on our asses and let bad news depress us, we end up doing nothing. 

[Auditioning for a DNC job?]

there needs to be a confiscatory tax on WEALTH in this country, not just income. It never has been a matter of the amount of wealth in the USA. It's ALWAYS been about the distribution of that wealth.

[They got stuff. We want it.]

Democrats need to really do something, but they long ago stopped representing the needy and poor, and now represent affluent with guilty consciences. It just sucks. 

[Count this as another sure Rat vote in November.]

This is the fourth year of a recession. The sky is not falling.

[Relax and enjoy the FUnEmployment.]


Fourth year - with nothing changing as far as the eye can see. That's the problem. 

[Didn't you get a shovel ready Green job?]

We need 125,000 new jobs each month to account for the population gain among working-age folks. And the new jobs are worse than the jobs that were lost. 

[Bush's fault!]

Back in the 1990s I had a factory job that made me lower class - I made 160% of the poverty level, making satellite dishes. 

[And now you're washing dishes.]

Revolution is a noble goal which I fully support. I question the resolve of the people in the street’s I just don’t see it going further than mass arrests. 

[And empty pizza cartons surrounding wannabee Bolsheviks posting from the safety of Mommy's basement.]

You're right. I give up. Enjoy your stay. 

[That was WILLIAM RIVERS PITT defending the OWS movement whose demonstrations he has NEVER attended.]

It's very frustrating that we elect and work for Democrats to get them into office, and then we are expected to push, beg and plead with them to do what we sent them there to do.

Friday, April 27, 2012

OccuPoet Misty: "The Huff and Puff of My Frustration"


Prog Spring of 2012 continues. Today we meet OccuPoet Misty Rowan of Minneapolis, who will grace us with one of her poems. Misty came to my attention via this THREAD in DUmmieland, "Our Amazing Occupy Poet!" I watched the video, and yes, I was amazed . . . at what passes for poetry with the OWSies and the DUmmies.

And seeing Misty of Minneapolis, I was reminded of Ted of New York. You know, Trust Fund Ted? Ted Hall, Tedward, Edward Twitchell Hall III, Flea-bagger Ted, Our Favorite OWSie. Remember when we introduced you to Ted "Help us now!" Hall last fall?


You see, Ted is a poet, too. Now if only we could get Ted and Misty together! Shaggy would have his Velma! Ted Hall and Misty Rowan: It would be Rowan and Moron's Laugh-In!


But this is Misty's day. Misty has her own BLOG, where she goes by the blog-handle, "MissTeaTree." Here's a little about her: "I live in Mpls, I listen to Ani DiFranco and I voted for Cynthia McKinney in the last presidential election. I am a member of the anti-war committee (.org) and in my time that's less than free I bag groceries at my local foods co-op. I consider poetry to be a performance-based, storytelling medium, so most of my stuff is spoken word. To me, art and activism are the same thing." (She bags groceries at her local foods co-op? So she's a Brie-bagger?)

So let us now be amazed and amused at the art and activism of OccuPoet Misty Rowan, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, the wag tailoring the doggerel, Charles Henrickson, inviting you now to click the link to the VIDEO and . . . wait for it . . . play Misty for me . . . is in the [brackets]:

The Huff and Puff of My Frustration

[The Stuff I Puff for Recreation]

(Laughs) It's not fair. If I were to punch you, as hard as I could, I would sprain my own wrist. You would maybe notice, as I reduced myself to tears. So instead I use my words. And I'll tell you one thing: This mouth? Never got me in a fight it didn't right-and-the-f*** get me back out of. You see, I said I use my words instead. And it's been working (so far).

[(Laughs) It's not fair. If I were to do poems for you, as bad as mine are, you would slit your own wrist. You would maybe notice, as you tried to cover your ears, that I don't use meter or lines or rational thought. So instead, I just talk real fast. And I'll tell you one thing: This mouth? It's a poety potty mouth. I throw in a "f***" or a "sh*t" here and there to express my free-floating angst. Then I add something hopeful-sounding at the end. And it's been working (so long as I'm talking to the far left).]

But, they're bailing out the banks again, those leeches with their fees. So the question then becomes: How much is your money worth? Depends. How much have ya got? Not a lot? Oh, that's okay, baby girl! You too could still be president. Just get in line, and we'll call you. And in the meantime, try to find a job worth a damn to do, because the rent is due, and you're not getting any younger, and these cards aren't exactly stacked in your favor. I said, get a clue, and pay attention, because the undercurrent is ever changing in its direction.

[But, I'm flailing at the banks again, those rich guys with toupees. 'Cause the question I want to avoid is: How much is our money worth? Depends. How much are we in debt? Quite a lot? Oh, that's okay, liberal! You should still vote for our president. Just get in line, and we'll fool you. And in the meantime, try to keep up with this poem, because I'm not half through, and it's not getting any less longer, and these words aren't exactly arranged in coherent order. I don't have a clue, so pay attention, because my underwear is starting to cause me irritation.]

And you wanna stay ahead of that game. You want that spot on top of the food chain, don't ya? Everybody's so busy looking out for #1, and then they wonder why they feel so all alone. So many skin and bones, while the top 1% clench their law enforcement fist so tight that you have the right to work until you die in this country, and that's about it. Now pay your bills and buy some sh*t. And don't forget to check your credit score.

[And you wanna have someone to blame. You got hate to fill up a freight train, don't ya? Everybody's so busy lashing out at the 1%, and then we ought to whine about our student loan. So many can't afford smartphones, while the top 1% won't raise a finger to assist our plight, and you have no right to make me work to buy things in this country, so let's throw a fit. Now pay my bills while I smoke some sh*t. And don't leave yet, because there's even more.]

And it gets harder to ignore when they're coming right for ya. But these folks, they just don't care anymore. You can change the channel if it bores ya. Me, I threw out my TV. People gotta tell me when I'm on it. People gotta explain the whole commercial, 'cause I never catch the reference. Man, I got better things to see. And I understand that time is precious. Mine is spent in reverence of this occupation, because I am in love with it, I am in love with it. I just. . . .

[So don't go running out the door when I'm going on forever. But some folks, they just can't take anymore. You can slit your other wrist if I bore ya. Some, they throw up hearing me. People often tell me that they vomit. People gotta exclaim and beg for mercy, 'cause I never catch a second breath. Man, I got better things to do than breathe. And I like to think that time is meaningless. Mine is spent irrelevant of close calculation, because I am in love with the sound of my voice, I am in love with it. I just. . . .]

(Deep breath) I need to learn how to slow down and just appreciate this moment. This one, 'cause it's all there is. And then I'm off again, forgetting. And I'm looking up again, and I'm searching for the lines that I had memorized, so that I--so that, well, so that I could think about something else.

[(No breath) I refuse to learn how to slow down and just approximate a regular poet. It's fun, 'cause I'm such a whiz. And then I'm off again, forever. And I'm looking at folks getting up again, and I'm searching for the ones that I can mesmerize, so that I--so that, well, so that I could speak about something else.]
Sometimes I feel helpless. Like I have a needle but no thread, so it's no good. I can only manage the damage. Sometimes I'm the subject of this charade, and some days I'm just its contents, that is displayed as a series of statistics--and yes, I am sometimes Y. So what of it? And what difference does it make when you die?

[Sometimes I feel clueless. Like I have a noodle but no bread, so it's no food. I can only mangle the language. Sometimes I'm a poet who sounds clichéd, and some days I'm just a moonbat, that is displayed as one serious yet simplistic--and yes, I am out of time. So what of it? And what difference does it make where I rhyme?]

Well, I want a government that practices something like the "take a penny, leave a penny" system. And there will come a day, but either way I'm for that rain-or-shine type of activism: the committed, who don't shed their tears but collect them, weaving them into meaningful tales. We tell each other stories of bravery and compassion to keep ourselves warm, to keep our hearts burning.

[Well, I want a government that practices something like the "take the booty from the snooty" system. From there will come our pay, but either way I'm for that soak-the-rich type of socialism: the dim-witted, who don't pay their taxes but collect them, receiving them into buckets and pails. We tell each other stories of slavery and oppression to keep ourselves mad, to keep our hate burning.]

And I'll tell you another thing: It's you, me, and everybody. So don't go making enemies, 'cause you can't win. Instead, it's time to start talking to these strangers, our neighbors. It's time to start caring for each other again. Call it community, call it an occupation, call it revolution if you wanna. Just get on it! Ten years ago woulda been a good place to start. Now will do. Or, at least I think we can all agree that now is the very best we can do.

[And I'll tell you another thing, and another, and another. So don't go making for the exit, 'cause I'm not done. Instead, it's time to start talking even longer, for hours. It's time to start wearing out my welcome again. Call it prolixity, call it a bloviation, call it regurgitation if you wanna. Just don't vomit! Ten years ago mighta been the time I began to start. I'm not through. Or, at least I think we can all agree that June is the very earliest I can do.]

So come with me and take heart. I got some New Year's resolutions and a good idea where to start. I got some friends on the inside, the outside, the flipside, and the best part is that you decide your place in this world, okay? You decide. So let's start. Because to build a better world, all you really gotta do . . . is your part.

[So come with me and smoke pot. I got some stashed inside my backpack and a good idea it's a lot. I got some friends from the insane, the profane, the birdbrain, and the upshot is that we complain about our place in this world, okay? Sweat and strain? No, let's not. Because to build a better world, all you really gotta do . . . is jack squat.]

Friday, April 20, 2012

Prog Spring: OWSies coming out of hibernation, preparing for May Day!


Ah, spring! The trees are greening up like so many broccoli sprouts across the landscape. The daffodils and daisies and dandelions are dotting the lawns of many a foreclosed home. Young men's hearts turn to thoughts of beer. And the Cubs are in last place. Yes, spring is in the air (see the pollen and mold counts).

Spring. It's a magical season. The earth comes to life, and we do with it. So it is with the young progressives. Their hearts turn to thoughts of occupying places. And so it is that after the long winter of their packed-up tent, the OWSies are coming out of hibernation! Mic check! The 99%ers are BACK, taking it to the streets, speaking truth to power, and sticking it to The Man! This is the Prog Spring of 2012!

Occupy Wall Street just had their "Spring Awakening," and other events are happening in New York and around the country throughout the month of April. But the Big News is . . . MAY DAY! MAY DAY! That's right, plans are in the works for having a huge, massive MAY DAY GENERAL STRIKE (#M1GS, for short). We'll show those lousy capitalists who we are! We'll make them sit up and take notice! GENERAL STRIKE! No Work! No Chores! No. . . . Wait. How is this different from any other day for the young progressives? Oh, well. . . . MAY DAY 2012! GENERAL STRIKE! TAKE THE STREETS!

Occupy meets May Day, a match made in Leningrad. We read about it in this THREAD, "Occupy May Day: Not Your Usual General Strike," and this THREAD, "MAY DAY! MAY DAY!" (BTW, did you know DUmmieland even has its own Occupy forum? That's where they can keep the five or six people who are so preoccupied with the Occupy movement that they need their own forum.)

So let us join the masses preparing to do nothing, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson--wondering if a) our favorite OWSie, Trust Fund Ted Hall, will be back out on the streets this spring, and b) the 40-Year-Old Insurgent, William Rivers Pitt, wll finally pull himself away from the Bruins' games on TV to actually go to one of these Occupy thingies--is in the [brackets]:

Occupy May Day: Not Your Usual General Strike

[Is there a "usual" General Strike?]

Last December, Occupy Los Angeles proposed a General Strike on May 1 “for migrant rights, jobs for all, a moratorium on foreclosures, and peace – and to recognize housing, education and health care as human rights.”

[What about free nachos? Nachos with meat and cheese. Not that yukky, stringy Velveeta stuff, either. Good cheese. So add free nachos to the list, as long as we're generally striking.]

The idea has spread through the Occupy movement.

[Like sands through the hourglass. Like Velveeta through the DUodenum.]

Occupy Wall Street in New York recently expressed solidarity with the proposal and called for “a day without the 99%, general strike, and more!” with “no work, no school, no housework, no shopping, take the streets!”

[w00t! Parr-tayy!! Will Trust Fund Ted be there?]

Reactions are ranging from enthusiastic support to outraged skepticism.

[To gales of laughter.]

Most Occupy May Day advocates understand that a conventional general strike is not in the cards. What they are advocating instead is a day in which members of the “99%” take whatever actions they can to withdraw from participation in the normal workings of the economic system. . . .

[As long as it's convenient. Real commitment may not be in your cards.]

by not working if that is an option. . . .

[Not working, an "option"?? Heck, it's a way of life!]

but also by not shopping, not banking, and not engaging in other “normal” everyday activities. . . .

[Just put all that stuff off till May 2.]

and by joining demonstrations, marches, disruptions, occupations, and other mass actions.

[Hear that, Pitt? Get off your Barcalounger and head for the barricades!]

What Occupy May Day Could Achieve

[ ]

The Occupy May Day event is first of all a great chance for 99% to show itself, see itself, and express itself – to represent itself to itself. . . .

[To occupy itself with itself.]

If it truly draws together a wide range of working people, ranging from the most impoverished to professionals, from urban to suburban to rural, and including African Americans, Latinos, whites, and immigrants, it can embody the ability of the 99% to act as a group.

[It will probably be 99% white upper-class "students," looking for hashish and hook-ups.]

Occupy Global General Strike on May 1st.

[Not One D*mn Anything Day!]

Strike for:
IM/MIGRANT RIGHTS
ECONOMIC, SOCIAL & ENVIRONMENTAL JUSTICE and LABOR RIGHTS
PEACE WITH JUSTICE
CIVIL LIBERTIES — END THE POLICE STATE
HOUSING, EDUCATION AND HEALTH CARE AS HUMAN RIGHTS
WOMEN’S RIGHTS, LGBTQ RIGHTS & GENDER EQUITY


[FREE NACHOS
CUBS' WORLD SERIES
UNICORN SPARKLE FARTS AND RAINBOWS]




What is #M1GS?

[Twitterese for "Epic Fail."]

Occupations across the world have made similar calls for a General Strike, or day of economic disruption, in direct response to Occupy Los Angeles, or through a synchronicity of thought, a buzzing hive mind that feels the need to express solidarity with movements. . . .

[Or that buzzing in your head could be a hashish hangover.]

How can I participate?

[Do nothing on May 1. Should not be much of a stretch.]

If you can’t participate on #M1GS, you can contribute in other ways. Spread the word. Poster your neighborhood. Help form Strike Committees in the workplace. Agitate. . . .

[Make a pest of yourself. Again, not much of a stretch.]

It would be great to see a big May Day turnout for once in my life.

[Sure, you've been disappointed in the past, but this, this will be different! Masses of hordes of throngs of people, all united, black and white and transgendered and Wiccan, all of us standing up together, arm in arm, shoulder to shoulder, nose ring to nose ring, making our voices heard! Yes! It will HAPPEN!! I can FEEL it! Oooh I can't wait I can't wait I can't WAIT!! Soon, soon, the world will be a better place! May 1st, baby! We're makin' HISTORY!!]

MAY DAY! MAY DAY!

[The Day When Everything Finally Changed 47.2]

To the activist, the rebel, the revolutionary, the dreamer.

[To the college student who wants to skip out on classes.]

To all who believe in a better world.

[Not you bad people who want to have a worse world.]

To those who have found their voice. . . .

[And would like to find a hippie chick to hook up with.]

Raise your fists, break your chains. Shake the world under your feet. . . .

[You do the hokey-pokey and you turn yourself around. . . .]

make a noise so loud, that the 1% will cower in their marble halls.

[SPEAK TRUTH TO MARBLE!]

For the time of The People has come.

[May 2 will be the time of The Laughing.]

Those who consider themselves our masters will find themselves standing in the path of a force the likes of which the world has never seen.

[NEVER. SEEN.]

You are a force so strong that Mother Nature herself cowers in your presence.

[SPEAK TRUTH TO MOTHER NATURE!]

For we are many. We are strong. We are awake.

[We are crazy.]

We are above your fear mongering, you who seek to silence us. You cannot threaten us with lies of alarm and panic. Your words are mist that dissipates as we march.

[Guerrillas in the mist.]

We will take to the streets, and march on until we reach a dawn that mankind has never been witness to.

[NEVER. BEEN WITNESS TO.]

This dawn will produce a light so strong that the fear hatred and doubt in our hearts will vanish like the early morning dew upon a blade of grass.

[Like DU upon the grass.]

Our hearts will instead be a raging inferno that cannot be extinguished.

[Like a towering inferno, like a disco inferno!]

Fear us, you 1%, for we are coming, and we are already here.

[I can smell you already!]

We are here, and everywhere.

[Like Chickenman.]

General Strike on May 1st. Join us.

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Progs in PIRGatory: DUmmies decry "McActivism sweatshops"


How's your PIRG? What, you don't know what a PIRG is?? Well, to be honest with you, I didn't know what a PIRG was, either--until I read a recent DUmmieland thread. But the DUmmies sure seemed to know what a PIRG was! They would mention the term all over the thread and never bother to explain it, since of course all progressives would know what it meant. But me, being a regressive oppressor--I had never heard the term before. So I looked it up. Apparently, it stands for "Public Interest Research Group," which is a fancy way of saying "an organization that promotes various leftist causes by canvassing people for support and using low-paid 'volunteers' to do the grunt work." In other words, it's phony grassroots activism.

However, not all DUmmies are pleased with their PIRG. Some are complaining that the PIRGs and other left-wing activist groups are mistreating the troops. We read about it here in this THREAD by DUmmie backscatter712, "Beware of sleazy 'progressive' McActivism sweatshops that chew up young progressives."

Progs in PIRGatory! I love it! For several reasons: 1) It illustrates how the Left can't get anything done unless they PAY their slacktivists to get off their lazy @$$es. 2) It shows what whiny wusses the slacktivists themselves are. 3) It exposes the hypocrisy of the self-righteous Left, squawking about "social justice" while mistreating their workers.

By the way, whatever happened to the Democratic Underground Activist Corps, aka DUAC? I thought DUAC Earl was going to mobilize the DUmmies into a force to be reckoned with, a mighty army rising up to change the world, and they would do it voluntarily. Oh, that's right. The DUmmies are too busy sitting at their computers, munching on Doritos and posting on DU. But, um, they'll be sure to get a LTTE off sometime this afternoon . . . or tomorrow . . . or sometime. . . .

So let us now go to the disgruntled grunts of DUmmieland, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, wondering when the Prog Spring will start up this year, is in the [brackets]:

Beware of sleazy "progressive" McActivism sweatshops that chew up young progressives

["McActivism sweatshops"? How can this be?? I thought all liberals were just and righteous and kind to animals and all living things! Besides, young noble progressives don't need any EMPLOYER to get them out onto the streets! They just do it spontaeously! For The Cause! DUAC! DUAC!]

I had a bad job experience. I lasted two weeks.

[Well, no wonder it was a bad experience! Two weeks is WAY too long to have to work!]

Then I got fired.

[For some strange reason, I am not surprised.]

If you're not a superstar at raking in contact information and donations, you don't make quota, and you're out.

[Can you imagine that? If you don't do the job you were hired to do, you get FIRED??  How unfair!]

The management calls themselves progressive, but they treat their employees like sh*t. And I'm f***ing pissed.

[Perhaps your language skills did not endear you to possible donors.]

Go to any college campus, and see the ads posted all over "MAKE MONEY SERVING A GOOD CAUSE!!! GREENPEACE!!! ACLU!!! MAKE $12/HR!!!"

[WE CAN'T FIND PEOPLE COMMITTED ENOUGH TO VOLUNTEER!!! WE HAVE TO PAY PEOPLE!!! HEY, WE CAN KEEP YOU IN DORITOS!!!]

Most of us have seen these people - they're the folks with the clipboards who are accosting people at college campuses, busy town centers and going door-to-door trying to get donations or contact information from you.

[The Jehovah's Witnesses of the political world.]

In my case, the cause I was hired to canvass for was Fair Share Alliance. You'd think that a well-run progressive activism outlet would provide opportunities to network progressives together, build connections, foster community.

[Look, the only reason I signed up was to make some easy cash and to hit on the chicks. But the b*st*rds wouldn't let me! They made me get out there and WORK! Or ELSE!]

Nope. None of that here. They put you on the street knocking on doors either taking contact information from people, or taking donations.

[It was crazy, I tell you! They made us DO what they HIRED us to do! Brutal!]

And they have you working under less-than-ideal conditions. . . . The law says you can canvass until 9:00 at night, so they make you canvass until 9:00 at night.

[NO!!!]

One of my coworkers had a gun pulled on her because she knocked on his door after dark.


I didn't make quota. So I got fired. As did a bunch of my coworkers. They chew people up and spit them out. They don't give a f*** about their safety, and insinuate that you're a sh*tty activist if you're not ultra-pushy.

[Quick, somebody call the WAAAAAAAAAAHMBULANCE!]

Lest you think that . . . I'm just bitter and have a bad attitude and I'm a bad worker and a bad progressive. . . .

[Now where would we get such an idea??]

I'd say getting fired from these sh*t-flingers is actually a blessing, because now I can say what I really think. F*** YOU, FAIR SHARE ALLIANCE! F*** YOU FOR TREATING YOUR WORKERS AND ACTIVISTS LIKE SH*T! F*** YOU FOR SOILING PROGRESSIVE CAUSES! F*** YOU FOR RECKLESSLY ENDANGERING YOUR WORKERS TO MAKE A QUICK BUCK!

[Righteous rant! Speak truth to power, brother!]

I'm going to broadcast my grievances loudly, and see what I can do to damage their reputation.

[No, you're not bitter at all!]

And I'm gonna switch to some other form of activism. . . .

[DUAC! DUAC! How about activisizing against liberal activist groups! Yes! Perfect!]

. . . and some other job.

[No, no, don't go THAT far! Now you're talking like a crazy person!]

At a place that doesn't treat employees like used toilet paper.

[Well, thank you, DUmmie backscatter712, for sharing your painful story. We all grieve with you. Now on to your colleagues . . .]

I did one day on a NYPIRG canvas when I was hard up for money in college. One day, and I recognized exactly what kind of scam this was and never went back.

["NYPIRG"? What's a "NYPIRG"? The "NY" I get, but what's a "PIRG"?]

it's essentially a pyramid scheme like any other, selling stupid bath soaps or whatever.

[Bath soaps!! No wonder the young progs are adverse!]

That was my experience with WIPIRG 20 years ago.

["WIPIRG"? The "PIRG" made it into Wisconsin?]

Also overheard a very angry manager at a Gay yellowpages in AZ go on a 30 minute YELLING spree with the sales staff. 

["This yellow does NOT go with my outfit! Yellow is so 2007! Get with it, people!!"]

Door-to-door canvassing is hard work.

 


I did a two or three day stint with NYPIRG back in college. . . .

[OK, so I finally looked up "PIRG," which all you DUmmies seem to be familiar with. "Public Interest Research Group." Astroturf activism.]

I did canvassing once. . . . they drove me to another area in DC where several people warned me about recent muggings. I did not collect a single dime. I was fired.

[Diversity is our strength. Next time wear a hoodie.]

Any org that accepts money from these sleezeballs is F***ED.  I'm looking at you, Greenpeace.

[AKA Greedfleece.]

Welcome to the wonderful world of PIRGs.

[Welcome to PIRGatory. Meet your quota, and you too can work your way up to being an oppressor!]

Being Liberal doesn't mean whining. It is no wonder the Right seizes upon this weakness and uses it against us. Buck up, little campers, and get ready to put some real effort into your lives. . . . Fir crying out loud...stop boo hooing about some crappy job and get on your game face. You people are ridiculous.

[DUmmie LittleCharlie (no relation to me, btw), you with only 32 posts, the two preceding of which were "hidden by Jury decision": I don't know whether to award you a Kewpie Doll for a Brief Moment of Mental Clarity . . . or to call you a LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!! I'm leaning toward the LFT.]

I personally hope the admins toss you out on your ass for being a jerk.

[If being a jerk were cause for removal, all of DUmmieland would be vacated.]

Looks like he's already gone. Good riddance to this subhuman troll.

[LFT, I knew it.]

I'm a canvass director at a non-profit that works on similar goals as many of these groups.

[DUmmie thepurpleknuckle admits to being an oppressor!]

For fund-raising canvassing . . . there is a HUGE racial gap. I've hired people from the inner-cities hoping I could train them . . . I had to fire them before I could ever get that far. Fund-raising canvassing favors white, upper to middle-class women over any other demographic. I've tried countless times to break this horrible fact within myself and within the field of canvassing to no avail. I'm white and I acknowledge my privileged background.

[RACIST!!]

I spend 12 hours a day doing this job. . . .

[Ha! You're oppressing YOURSELF!! You should fire you!]

I do fire people for not making quota. It's part of the job. It f***ing sucks and has brought me to tears before.

[Yeah, right. You probably chortle.]

I school my canvassers in the basic concepts of community organizing as put forward by Saul Alinsky.

[Saul Alinsky, Mentor to the Stars. Sounds good. DUmmie backscatter712 responds . . .]

I'd happily join your union if fate brought me to your organization rather than a PIRG/GCI sweatshop.

[These white, upper to middle-class women you have . . . Do you have any pictures?]

Monday, April 09, 2012

"Europe Is Baffled by the U.S. Supreme Court"


One of the enduring mysteries of life is the DUmmies' infatuation with Europe. I mean, disincentivizing tax rates, oppressive political correctness, moral decline, secularization--no, wait, it's no mystery at all! That's exactly what the DUmmies WANT!

But what IS an enduring mystery is why the DUmmies don't just move there. Europe is everything they long for and desire. So why don't they go? Is it the distance? I'm told they make airplanes now that will get you across the ocean in a matter of hours. Is it the language? I personally offer to teach Swedish for FREE to any DUmmie who promises to move there and never come back. And if Europe is too far, there's always the poor man's Europe, our neighbor to the north, Canada. But still, the DUmmies won't leave.

Whenever the dark stain on America's soul that is conservatism rears its ugly head, the DUmmies will look to Europe and whine, "Oh, why, WHY can't we be more like Europe?? Just THINK of what our more enlightened cousins across the sea must think of us! This backward, redneck nation of Jesusland rethuglicans! YECCHH!! Oh, please, Europe, don't confuse us progressives with our dimwitted countrymen! We are ASHAMED to be Americans! We truly are!"

So it is when it comes to Obamacare (AKA the ACA) and the pending decision of the Supreme Court as to its constitutionality. The DUmmies are embarrassed that this should even be an issue! The Europeans are laughing at us! Ouch! And if they only knew that this is not even about single-payer socialized medicine, like Europe has, but just about mandated health insurance. . . . If they knew that, they'd be even more aghast at America! We are WAAAYYY behind Europe in our march toward socialism!  And so our thread for today, this THREAD, "Europe Is Baffled by the U.S. Supreme Court."

So let us now don our Eurowannabe duds and join the Eurowannabe DUmmies, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, who has spent a lot of time in Europe but prefers America, is in the [brackets]:

Europe Is Baffled by the U.S. Supreme Court

[Oh, no! America is going to embarrass us AGAIN!]

Europe is scratching its head over possibility that the U.S. Supreme Court will strike down President Obama's signature legislative achievement. As the judiciary and the Obama administration trade legal barbs over the high court's authority, the idea that health care coverage, largely considered a universal right in Europe, could be deemed an affront to liberty is baffling.

[The Baffle of Europe.]

"The Supreme Court can legitimately return Obamacare?" asks a headline on the French news site 9 POK. . . .

[The Paris sites are baffled.]

"Sans précédent, extraordinaires". . . .

[Which means, "What a stupid president you have!"}

In the German edition of The Financial Times, Sabine Muscat is astonished at Justice Antonin Scalia's argument that if the government can mandate insurance, it can also require people to eat broccoli.

[Ich bin ein Broccoliner.]

"Absurder Vergleich". . . .

["What an absurd vegetable!"]

Over in Britain, the opposition is more direct. The Guardian's Kevin Powell called the debate "surreal" in his Monday column. "Wasn't the point to make sure the richest and most powerful nation on the planet could protect its own people, as other nations do?" he wrote. "If Americans are promised not just liberty but life and happiness, is there not a constitutional right to affordable healthcare?"

[Britian can't even get their teeth straight, and you're going to lecture us?? . . . Now on to the Eurowannabe DUmmies . . .]

Europe needs to get in line for bafflement . . . plenty of bafflement right here.

[Europe needs to get in line for their healthcare . . . and then wait about eight months.]

Except for the baby, no one in my family has health insurance.

[In that case, you better hope Obamacare is struck down, or else you're going to jail! Except for the baby.]

We have five Ju$ti¢e$ and four Justices. Five of them have been bought off and none of those five even go to the bathroom without getting permission from Wall Street.

[They are the sitting justices.]

Pack Congress with Democrats in November and everything can and will be corrected.

[Uh, wasn't Congress packed with Democrats in '09 and '10, and didn't they GIVE us Obamacare?]

an overwhelmingly Democratic congress can pass single payer after the November elections.

[And my Cubs can win the World Series in October. Hey, it could happen!]

Vote a straight Democratic ballot in November.

[Yes, you Democratics, vote a straight Democrat ticket on November 7! Remember, remember, the Seventh of November!]

From your lips to God/dess' ears.

[To Whom It May Concern, have mercy on us!]

we live in a sociopathic country... prime environment for fascism. . . . the same bastards who claim to be pro-life would watch you die.

[Yes, there never have been any provisions for the poor and destitute until now! All those hospitals founded by Christian churches? They didn't exist! All those charities? It's just your imagination! Only the federal government can take care of you!]

Not just "watch you die," but cheer loudly at the prospect!

["Death to liberals!" they would cry. "YAY!!!"]

Providing health care is an affront to liberty at the same time forced strip searching and rectal/vaginal inspections . . . is not.

[benburch is strongly in favor of forced strip-searching and rectal inspections.]

The US is the ONLY country in the world with a party as extreme as the GOP. There is NO other political entity, in fact no more OPPRESSIVE regime, than the America republican party. . . . I keep saying, we must get rid of the GOP if we are to have ANY chance of integrating into the society of civilized nations. The republican Party . . . has existed as a criminal organization for several decades now. Use existing RICO statutes to neutralize it financially, then use criminal statutes to get rid of the rest of it.

[Death to rethuglicans! YAY!!!]

They've made it their mission to sabotage everything President Obama tries to do.

[Simply because he's black. Don't forget to add, "They can't stand having a black man in the White House."]

the current Republican party lives to obstruct, sabotaging the Democrats being more important than making the government work. Seems to me pretty close to treason.

[It IS treason! Opposition to Democrats is TREASON!! DEATH to Rethuglicans! String 'em up!]

Who cares what they [the Europeans] think. . . . clearly our Constitutions are different.

[Ruh roh. . . .]

Its nothing to do with the constitution. . . .

[Who cares about that dumb old constitution! Phooey on it!]

I'll take our constitution against any European constitution any day of the week.

[Whoa, them's fightin' words! Prepare for tombstoning in 3 . . . 2 . . .]

Europe needs to call Thom Hartmann. He'll straighten them out, PDQ.

[How about Olbermann? He could go along.]

Well, we go by the rule of law as expressed in the Constitution. Journalists in Europe, one would think, would be sophisticated enough to understand our system.  Not that it is "an affront to liberty." It would be a matter of whether our federal government has the power under the Constitution.

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

Our Constitution is the highest law of the land.

[NO, NO, STOP IT!!!]

We would and the planet would be better off if we all took followed Europe`s lead in Democratic Socialism. Peace and prosperity would be the result. . . .

[And unicorns would fart sparkles and rainbows.]


A majority of Americans seem to have no idea what Socialism is. They think : Communism, forced, rigid government, "they'll take what I have and give it to the worthless."

[Actually, that pretty much nails it.]

No wonder the Europeans think we're a clueless, uneducated bunch of rednecks.

[Oh, why, WHY can't we be more like Europe!!]

We are a disgrace in the eyes of the rest of the world.

[We're sorry we exist, rest of the world! We're so ashamed!]

Want a perfect Court? Invent the perfect man.

[I thought that was Obamassiah. Just abolish the Supreme Court and have him do both jobs. He's doing such a bang-up job as President, after all.]

The court needs to be bigger.

[Or smaller. Just The One.]

USA! USA! USA!

[Settle down, settle down! Pitt may write an essay on you.]

our courts have the right to rule on what is and what is not constitutional.

[No, not THIS again!]

How does ensuring all citizens have access to affordable healthcare not meet the concept in the preamble to the Constitution that reads "promote the general welfare"?

[As usual--nay, as is always the case--the liberals don't have a CLUE as to what that phrase is there for.]

How more intrinsic to "welfare" can there be than ensuring people can see a doctor when they need to?

[What about food? Isn't that even more intrinsic? FREE FOOD FOR ALL! UNIVERSAL BROCCOLI!]

We have been told our whole life that we have three co-equal branches of government. Before our very eyes we can see that one leg of the three can overturn the will of the other two. . . .

[Um, it's called "separation of powers," "checks and balances." Kinda like when a president vetoes a bill, he's "overturning the will" of the Congress.]

Most Europeans would be opposed to Obamacare if they knew what it was. Most Europeans thinks this healthcare bill is about normal single payer healthcare like we have in Europe, thats why they are baffled.

[You guys are SO FAR ahead of us!! You have almost NO freedom left! You are so lucky!]

Repeat this over and over. MEDICARE FOR ALL!

[And click your heels as you do! MEDICARE FOR ALL! MEDICARE FOR ALL! THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE EUROPE! THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE EUROPE! THERE'S NO PLACE. . . .]

the eyes of the world are on the SCOTUS. . . .

[Quit looking at my SCOTUS!]

So, does the Supreme Conservative Five make themselves look like @ssholes?


Amicus Briefs in Support of the Petitioners. . . .

[Quit looking at my Amicus Briefs!]

I think Europeans are baffled by many things about America. . . .

[What I'M baffled by is WHY YOU DON'T MOVE TO EUROPE!!! Look, there are planes leaving tomorrow! I'll help you pack! You can send postcards!]

Saturday, April 07, 2012

NY Times Readers React To NBC Zimmerman Editing Fraud

Last night the Media Decoder BLOG at the New York Times revealed that an NBC News fired a producer for fraudulently editing the George Zimmerman phone call tape in a pathetic attempt to make him look like he was racially motivated when he shot Trayvon Martin in Sanford, FL:

NBC News has fired a producer who was involved in the production of a misleading segment about the Trayvon Martin case in Florida.

The person was fired on Thursday, according to two people with direct knowledge of the disciplinary action who declined to be identified discussing internal company matters. They also declined to name the fired producer. A spokeswoman for NBC News declined to comment.

The action came in the wake of an internal investigation by NBC News into the production of the segment, which strung together audio clips in such a way that made George Zimmerman’s shooting of Mr. Martin sound racially motivated. Ever since the Feb. 26 shooting, there has been a continuing debate about whether race was a factor in the incident.

The segment in question was shown on the “Today” show on March 27. It included audio of Mr. Zimmerman saying, “This guy looks like he’s up to no good. He looks black.”

But Mr. Zimmerman’s comments had been taken grossly out of context by NBC. On the phone with a 911 dispatcher, he actually said of Mr. Martin, “This guy looks like he’s up to no good. Or he’s on drugs or something. It’s raining and he’s just walking around, looking about.” Then the dispatcher asked, “O.K., and this guy — is he white, black or Hispanic?” Only then did Mr. Zimmerman say, “He looks black.”

For the blog author, Brian Stelter, the most painful part of his story had to be this acknowledgement:

The editing of the segment was initially noticed by NewsBusters, an arm of the Media Research Center, a conservative media monitoring group. 

So where was the Mainstream Media in getting at the truth of this fraudulent editing job? MIA as usual. And even this Times blog buys into the laughable notion that this was somehow just a mistake:

The people with direct knowledge of the firing characterized the misleading edit as a mistake, not a purposeful act.

Sure, sure just an innocent mistake. Does anybody buy that? So far the DUmmies and the KOmmies haven't reacted to this but here are the reactions of the Timesies. Most of the comments are posted by normal people but what is interesting are the lame reactions from the sputtering leftwingers. So let us now watch the Timesies response to this latest NBC News scandal in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, again reminding everybody that it was NEWSBUSTERS which first exposed this fraudulent editing, is in the [brackets]:

When I listed to his calls the first thing that came to mind that he was targeting a black person. His tone of voice, what he was saying, how he described the man, that the man had no reason for being where he was, etc, etc, he was deliberately vague and hesitated before mentioning race because I believe he realized that he was on shaky ground. He continued trailing Martin despite being clearly advised not to do so. He seems determined to confront Martin no matter what. If it was a strange white or hispanic man would he have pursued them the way he did? I doubt it. His actions were driven by racial animus for a black man. 

[That's what you get for listening to the FRAUDULENTLY edited NBC audio. However, now that they have been exposed, you still won't change your mind. You've got your "Zimmerman as racist" theme hardwired into your tiny brain no matter what the evidence says.]

I didn't read NBC apologizing directly to Mr. Zimmerman.



[You also didn't read Spike Lee apologizing to Zimmerman for giving out an address (which proved incorrect) in an attempt to get a hit on him.]

What a farce. The edit didn't alter the racist nature of the attack one iota. Andrew Brietbart stitched together lying narratives out of whole cloth and the national media praised his pluck then eulogized him on his death. The right puts a little pressure on NBC and another truth teller is thrown to the side of the road. Any "right" thinking person understands what happened that night. When one listens to the entire, enhanced tape the racist venom coming from Zimmerman is undeniable, not to mention the mounds of other evidence. 

[What evidence? As usual this leftwing loon leaves that out.]

Does it really matter? 

[Um, yeah.]

Somebody had to go out of their way to carefully calculate exactly where to cut & what to rejoin it to make that soundbite as deceptively inflammatory as possible while still making sense. It's preposterous to contend otherwise. 

[But that is exactly what NBC News is contending. I wonder if Brian Williams will report his as a "mistake" with a straight face?]

The producer has a promising future over at Fox News. 

[NBC News commits the crime and FOX News somehow gets the blame.]

Readers of NYT who wonder if the mainstream media gives them the full story should make a regular effort to check out Newsbusters.com. Brent Bozell and Media Research Center regularly expose bias and unprofessionalism such as this on a daily basis. These formerly venerable news organisations distort the regular flow of news to further their own political agenda, and Newsbusters calls them out on it every time. Congratulations, Brent. They won't be able to ignore you after this. 

[Amen!]

Not to excuse the Today incident, but at least NBC took action. Fox often plays fast and loose with the truth with slick editing all the time, with never any correction or apology.

[And of course, no SPECIFICS from this loon.]

Unfortunately this plays right into the mouths of those who are always ranting about left-wing media bias. 

[So sad when the painful TRUTH does not fit the leftwing script.]

Sunday, April 01, 2012

Olbermann hired by Fox News, DUmmies torn


No, I'm kidding. April Fools. Keefie is still fired. Oh, haven't you heard? Keith Olbermann was fired AGAIN, this time by Current TV, Algore's little network that nobody watches. And Keef now is vowing to take Algore to court. And so I'm NOT kidding about the DUmmies being torn. I mean, Olbie vs. Algore? What's a progressive to do?

Multiple threads on this at the DUmp, more people commenting than probably watched his show. We'll start with this THREAD, "Gored: Olbermann Out at Current," and take it from there.

So let us keep Current with KO and his fans and critics, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, pondering how bad Current TV must be when Cenk Uygur is now your biggest star, is in the [brackets]:

Gored: Olbermann Out at Current

[Algore is now the Worst Person in the World.]

Keith Olbermann has been fired by Current TV, and replaced by Eliot Spitzer.

[Puttin' on the Spitz. Anthony Weiner was unavailable.]

Olbermann was a monumental egomaniac and ass.

[And those are his good points.]

Probably Keith needs to run his own network.

[He'd probably end up firing himself.]

Rachel Maddow's show is so much better. . . .

[Rachel is the man!]

I like Keith a lot and will look for him on the web.

[If he tries to get a job here at DUmmie FUnnies, we'll start him out by making him a gofer for Li'l Beaver.]

CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!! Keith was the ONLY reason i watched current tv.

[CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!! You were his ONLY viewer.]

One day Keith will learn how not to alienate his employers.

[The Day When Everything Finally Changed.]

I think he doesn't work/play well with others, and he's overly-impressed with his own importance. Al Gore doesn't need that sh*t.

[An Inconvenient Keith.]

How much experience does Al Gore have in broadcast journalism?

[Well, he did invent the Internet. . . . CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now he'll probably keep him out of THAT!]

@KeithOlbermann on Twitter right fuggin' now!

[Did Anthony Weiner teach him how to tweet pictures?]

ripping Al Gore a new one.

[There is now a hole in Algore's ozone layer.]

I will not watch Current TV again!

[Current's ratings just dropped by 20%.]

I'm finished with Current as well.

[40%.]

He speaks truth to power.

[Drink!]

He should have been made Emperor of the Universe and been given a solid gold Cadillac.

[OK, so Keith's contract demands were a little high. . . .]

Eliot Spitzer would take Countdown’s 8 p.m. timeslot effective immediately.

[Client 9, now at 8.]

And Rush still has a job.

[It's not a Fluke.]

Before Olbermann, Current's standard fare as far as programming is concerned consisted of obscure documentaries about goatherders in Khazakstan and the like.

[Maybe Keith can get a job as a goatherder in Kazakhstan. He can count down the goats.]

It’s hard to know whom to root for in the coming legal showdown between Keith Olbermann and Al Gore, the former a widely reviled liberal polemicist who cannot hold a job in cable TV and the latter a failed presidential candidate who launched a cable network in 2005 seemingly just for the fun of running it into the ground.

[Hee! Hee!]

He might go the online rout and simply control his own show.  Heck why not radio.

[Air America beckons.]

Can someone fire Ed Schultz next?

[Would anyone know the difference?]

I would watch Charles M. Blow. Seriously. Give that guy his own show.

[The Blow Show? No.]

My guess on KO's next TV gig... reading the weather. I'm thinking someplace like Boise or Portland.

[How about the ShamWow gig? I heard they might have an opening.]

Well, I don't think he's tried Al-Jazeera or Pravda yet.

[He did MSNBC. That's close enough.]

Maybe we'll see him on the next season of Celebrity Apprentice?

[Keith already hears "You're fired!" in his sleep.]

Can we get Keith to replace Biden on the ticket?

[OBAMA/OLBERMANN 2012
O + O = 0]

There's no more networks. CNN isn't going to take him. Bridges have been burned with MSNBC and Current. Where else is he going to go?

[The Oprah Network. New host of the Rosie Show.]

Most of America doesn't give a sh*t what happens to him.

[One Kewpie Doll, coming up! Congratulations, DUmmie tularetom!

He can go be the top TV personality in Bumf*ck Egypt as far as I'm concerned.

[Bumf*ck called. There are no openings.]

He's pretty much radioactive right now.

[He's pretty much radio-and-TV-inactive right now.]

Perhaps he could get a job less stressful like designing t-shirts or maybe he could help with the signs at OWS protests.

[Maybe he and Pitt could go Occupy someplace. Maybe co-author a book with Pitt.]

Currant TV. . . .

[I hear you can get that on your BlackBerry. Unless the signal is jammed.]

Dang. How does Rove pull this stuff off???

[Mind rays.]

I love Keith Olbermann.

[Is that you, Keith Olbermann?]