Monday, January 31, 2011

"Homeless But Wireless Girl": Bobo plays the Victim Card

When a THREAD like "I talked to a homeless woman the other day" shows up in DUmmieland, guess what is sure to follow? You got it! A friendly visit from our favorite homeless DUmmie, none other than bobbolink, aka Bobo the Hobo.

Whenever the topic of homelessness or poverty comes up, and even when it doesn't, you can be sure that DUmmie bobbolink will be there, playing the Victim Card, whining and moaning, accusing her fellow DUmmies of not caring enough about the poor to DEMAND that she gets a free house and a healthy income simply for being Bobo the Hobo. And don't tell her to get a job! No sirree! How dare you! Don't you care about the poor?

Now you may wonder how a woman who claims to live in the back of a car has the means to be hooked into the internet, night and day, 24/7, in order to post in DUmmieland. Bu that's part of the wonder and the mystique of our Bobo! Besides, by playing the Victim Card, she was able last year to get Pitt to blow his top and threaten her physically and get himself suspended fromt he DUmp! That is quite an accomplishment, so let's cut her some slack.

In fact, before we get to the thread, let's sing this musical tribute to our "Homeless But Wireless Girl." Click the music link, go to about the 1:10 mark, and sing along!

Homeless But Wireless Girl
Tune: "Sadder But Wiser Girl" (starting at 1:10)

No helpless, hopeless, homeless, typical powerless hobo is she
This Bobo gal spins webs world-wide or so it--now listen boy
A gal who trades on all that poverty
Merely has to post her correspondence for our comedy
The only affirmative she will write
Is if you publicize her plight
No modest, meager, measly soupline shelter--no sir!
For no cheap handout will do the trick, she can tell you that right now

She bears the slurs
How can suffering be compared to hers?
She's quite the star
For a lady who lives inside a car
She'll raise a big stink
She's a victim, that's our bobbolink
The homeless but wireless girl is she!

No bed-and-boarding room for Bobo the Hobo--no sir!
Our bobbolink wants digs the Donald never knew
She prefers to have a home
Like a villa outside Rome
No matter how much she keeps demanding
All the time it keeps expanding
No humble home will satisfy Bobo--no sir!
Why, she's the pauper and you're the prince, you see? Pop!

She'll howl, she'll cry
At a casual careless thread reply
She's quite the wit
She managed to tombstone William Pitt
I laugh real hard
When Bobo can play her victim card
The homeless but wireless girl's the girl for me
The homeless but wireless girl is she!

So let us now go to the DUmp and await Bobo's arrival, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, the wag tailoring the doggerrel, Charles Henrickson, wondering if Pitt can pull a few strings and get Bobo a job as an internationally bestselling author/bouncer, is in the [brackets]:

I talked to a homeless woman the other day..

[Yes, DUmmie Fumesucker, how good and noble you are to stoop to talk to a poor oppressed homeless woman! Oh, btw, did you do anything to HELP her? . . . {hypocrickets chirping} . . .]

She told me that the day before that was even colder and rainy she spent all day in her sleeping bag under the bridge where she lives, she then mentioned that she can't leave her stuff for more than a few minutes because someone worse off than her is likely to steal what few meager possessions she has.

[She should do like Bobo and sleep in a car with an internet connection.]

It's hard to get much more poor than living under a damn bridge like a f***ing troll in cold, wet weather.


Yes, poor people in Egypt are truly suffering, my point is that we have people that are arguably as badly off right here. . . .

[Want like an Egyptian . . .]

Americans are so apathetic. . . .

people are content to put in their 8 hours and come home to an evening of American Idol. . . .

[They don't care about the American Idle.]

I have . . . taken part in many demonstrations. . . .

[But don't ask me to actually HELP a homeless person!]

Reagan cut funding for all the State mental hospitals. . . .

[Fortunately, DUmmieland opened its doors.]

it ALSO had to do with the ACLU enacting new legislation that said that people can't be incarcerated or "held" if they are not "a danger to themselves or others".

[No no! Can't be any other factors! Must blame it all on Raygun!]

[Wait a minute? Who's this I see coming to the white courtesy phone? Why yes, it's . . .]

So, you think the answer, then, is to lock up everyone living on the streets???????

[Yes, it's BOBBOLINK, already whipping out her trusty Victim Card!] and I didn't say that.

[Doesn't matter! Bobo needs someone to go after!]

It was sure the conclusion that one would draw. After all, being "a danger to yourself" IS grounds for locking people up. And depriving them of all rights, I might add. So, yes... it is actually what you said. It is time to think through the consequences of our thought processes.

[GUILTY! in the Court of Bobo!]

And being homeless, because this SOCIETY doesn't care to make sure that ALL have housing. . . .

[FREE Nice Big Houses for ALL! And none of this cheap stuff!]

It really doesn't have to do with "hospitals", and the thing to remember is that by repeating that, it continues the destructive myth that most homeless people are "mentally ill", which is NOT the case.

[DUmmie bobbolink is perfectly SANE, NOT "mentally ill," and she resents you for even insinuating that! Soooo . . . why hasn't she gone out and tried to get a job, you ask? Don't go there!]

Take your self-righteous "I need to beat someone up" schtick elsewhere.

[Ruh roh! DUmmie whathehell gives it right back to DUmmie bobbolink! Watch it, whathehell, you don't want to end up tombstoned like Wee Willie Pitt! Picking on a poor homeless woman! Shame on you!]

there are a lot of organizations. HOWEVER, the problem is, they exist soley for charity to individual people. That can NEVER "solve" the problem.. it only serves to keep it going.

["Charity to individuals am BAD!" in Bobo's Bizarro World!}

Until We, The People are committed to providing low-income housing for all who need it, homelessness will continue.

[Until YOU, The People with Jobs and Money and Stuff, are committed to giving me, Bobo the Hobo, a Free Nice Big House--none of this cheap stuff--you SIMPLY DON'T CARE!]

Saturday, January 29, 2011

MSNBC's Cenk Uygur: Pathetic or the real deal?

It's been a week now since the Canning of Keith Olbermann. Many of the DUmmies are still mired in deep Keef Grief, but some have moved on.

MSNBC has moved on. They have installed a new guy to fill the hole, someone named . . . Cenk Uygur?? Yes, that's right, Cenk Uygur. So now their nightly line-up looks like this:

The As-Yet-Unnamed Time Slot, with Cenk "Eye Chart" Uygur
Harebrained, with Chris "Crazyleg" Matthews
The Lost World, with Lawrence "Lawrence of Insania" O'Donnell
The Rachel Mancow Show, with Rachel "Madcow" Mancow
The Ed Show, with Ed "Sergeant" Schultz

A regular Murderers' Row, eh? (Oops, sorry, violent metaphor there.) The DUmmies probably view Rachel as the top man there now.

So who is this Cenk Uygur, you ask? And well you may. For up to this point, Mr. Whatzisname has been an obscure left-wing blogger, hosting some unwatched web show called "The Young Turks." Mr. Mxyzptlk, you see, is of Turkish ancestry, and he used to be young. Now, though, he's simply the 40-Year-Old Turkey. But apparently he fits the MSNBC "Loon Forward" profile: a foul-mouthed, hate-filled, Looney Leftie.

Well, over in DUmmieland, putting this guy on the air has set off a Cenk Uygur Flame War, which is almost as much FUn as a Cenk Uygur Spelling Bee. The house is divided. MSNBC's Cenk Uygur: Pathetic or the real deal? That is the question.

And we get different answers in DUeling DU threads. "Pathetic" leads the way in this
THREAD, "Cenk Uygur? That's the best MSNBC could find? He is pathetic." However, another DUmmie counters by saying Cenk is "the real deal" in this THREAD, "Cenk Uygur is the best the MSNBC could find! He is the real deal." It's FUnnie to see them get so worked up over someone no one is going to watch, except half of them!

So let us now don our asbestos overcoats and venture into Democratic Uygurground, in Flame-War Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson--wondering if Cenk will stay on the air long enough for his fifteen viewers to learn how to spell his name, much less pronounce it--is in the [brackets]:

Cenk Uygur? That's the best MSNBC could find? He is pathetic.

[I'll take that as a thumbs down on the Young Jerk.]

Can't believe he took over the 'hole' KO left.

[benburch would be GLAD to fill KO's hole. "Lean Forward"--that's ben's motto too!]

I don't care for Cenk

[Two "no's" on Cenk Uruguay.]

What's not to like? I'd be willing to bet the guy will have a more "common-man" appeal too, much like Ed.

[Cenk will have a more "commun-ist" appeal, much like Ed.]

they really need to run a rabid liberal lady in there. (besides Rachel)

[Rachel would like a rabid liberal lady beside her.]

Cenk is the only talk show host that interviewed DU's very own Skinner!!!

[That should tell you something.]

he is always looking to complain about something and not simply telling us the news (and usually raising his annoying voice at the same time).


I find him boring.

[Another vote against the Unnngh Turk.]

The guy is literally unwatchable. He routinely bellows the sort of wild-eyed, half-baked hyperbole we all criticize. . . .

["No" on Turkish Daffy.]

But he can spell!

[With a name like Cenk Ugygyygrrr, you have to!]

You must not have been watching the same Cenk. . . .

[There are two of them?]

I don't mind him. I don't watch that much, but he doesn't bother me. Could be worse.

[A ringing endorsement for Cenk Yogurt!]

If I would watch MSNBC I would watch Cenk. But I won't watch because they fired Keith.


I love him, I think he's TERRIFIC!

[Signed, Cenk Uygur]

Whatever dude, Cenk is awesome


The type of show they have him doing isn't his strong suit. He doesn't enunciate as well. . . .

[YOU try saying Cenk Ungnguyyyrrrrr!]

I hereby declare you the loser of the first annual Cenk Uygur flame war.

[I have a feeling this may be the LAST annual Cenk Uygur flame war.]

there has been zero marketing (Cenk isn't even listed in the MSNBC primetime commercials) and the show doesn't even have an official name, his own customized team and set, etc.

[True, but he costs a lot less than Keefie. Follow the capitalism: Keef was pulling down 7 mil; they're probably paying El Cinko a paltry 7 thou.]

Cenk Uygur is the best the MSNBC could find! He is the real deal.

[A big thumbs UP for Cinko de Mao!]

He has no personality. He's boring.

[And a quick "no" on the Cankersore.]

He may be boring but he is not a drone.

[A left-winged compliment, I guess.]

Not afraid of sh*t he!

[Yoda checks in.]

Cenk just states the obvious and isn't professional. His read is crap, he's an arrogant ego-maniac.

[Picky, picky, picky. . . .]


[Turkish Delight!]

I had him on in the kitchen while making supper... I LIKE!

[YES for the Kitchen Cenk!]

I hereby declare you the winner of the first annual Cenk Uygur flame war.


Friday, January 28, 2011

DUmmies Support Street Violence

Nothing better illustrates the utter HYPOCRISY of the DUmmies and other leftwingers than their strong desire to see the violence of the Egyptian street demonstrations come to America. You can see their strong desire for VIOLENCE in America in this THREAD, "What the people of Egypt are doing now is exactly what we should be doing to Wall Street and the money brokers." Remember it was just about a week ago that we heard the DUmmies get up on their high horses in the wake of the Arizona shooting and lecture conservatives about the need to tone down the violent rhetoric in which they were NOT engaging. Among the DUmmie ringleaders was the highly violent WILLIAM RIVERS PITT who just months ago was tossed out of DUmmieland for threatening violence on the homeless woman known as Bobo the Hobo. Since that time Pitt has posted several sick violent fantasies including his wish to become a firebomber. And now we see his fellow DUmmies drop all pretenses about being against violence as they come out in support of VIOLENT revolution here in America. So let us now watch the DUmmies fantasize about the violence coming to America in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if the DUmmies will actually demonstrate to bring down Obama, is in the [brackets]:

What the people of Egypt are doing now is exactly what we should be doing to Wall Street and the money brokers.

[In case you haven't noticed, it was Obama who gave BILLIONS to bail out his Wall Street buddies.]

The fact is that they are literally robbing the treasury as we speak. They would shit their pants and be screaming "Let's talk about it" just as Gibbs is saying about Egypt. These people love their power just up to the point that they really don't have any. That is if the people;e get fed up.

[And WHO was it that handed those Wall Street Friends of Obama all that loot?]

I truly believe that Americans have forgotten about the impact of protests like this. I'm hoping that we'll start to remember what it is to stand up to injustice.

[So you're going to demonstrate to drive Obama out of the White House? If not, then what is the point of your protests other than just for the sake of protesting?]

I am still holding out for a democratic solution, however I won't be surprised if it happens here too if things don't change, and if it does, I'll be with them in the streets, because things will be too bad not to be. At that point employment is trivial.

[Employment is already trivial for you since you don't have a job.]

If you're not ready to die for a cause, you don't deserve to live.

[Bravely posted the DUmmie who would suffer a massive urination in his pants at the very thought of even the slightest injury to his precious self.]

I think people are getting sick of incremental non-change. Just a hunch.

[So you're going to drop the pizza and violently demonstrate against WHAT? Obama?]

The electoral system is a Potemkin Village. It is effectively controlled by the ruling class.

[Theorized the Pizza Bolshevik.]

We might wear a politically provocative T-shirt to a rally, or carry a protest sign for a few hours, then go home and watch "Jersey Shore" and order a pizza, then envision ourselves as "radicals".

[And this DUmmie WINS a Kewpie Doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity!]

DUmmies Hope Street Revolutions Come To USA

For anyone gullible enough to actually believe the DUmmies and others on the left who spout their phony talk about how they "respect" the constitution and our democratic institutions, I refer them to this THREAD, "Are We Witnessing the Start of a Global Revolution?" Notice how quickly that the DUmmies, observing the street revolt that happened in Tunisia as well as the one currently going on in Egypt, are so eager for the same thing to happen here in America? Of course, both those middle east countries had/have authoritarian governments with limited freedoms so what does that say about what they think about the much beloved Barack Obama? Does that mean they think Obama needs to be overthrown? The DUmmies don't say but all they know is that we need a street revolution in America. Of course, what they REALLY want is a Bolshevik Revolution followed by totalitarian communism but they won't say that out loud...usually. So let us now watch the DUmmies yearn for revolution in the streets in America in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, happy once again to EXPOSE the TRUE beliefs of the DUmmies, is in the [brackets]:

Are We Witnessing the Start of a Global Revolution?

[Posted DUmmie GliderGuider with the great hope it will spread here.]

The tempo of radical change appears to be quickening on all fronts around the world. Food prices are rising in the face of supply limits and the ecological impacts of over-exploitation and climate change. Energy prices are rising in the face of supply limits. The global corporate economy is in tatters, if not ruins. Governments are becoming ever more entrenched in authoritarianism as they face mounting resistance from their citizens.

Out of all great changes come great opportunities. We may be looking at a golden moment for individual citizens around the world to reclaim some measure of sovereignty and control over their lives -- if they are bold enough, or desperate enough, to seize it.

[Don't expect the DUmmies to break away from their pizzas to actually DUAC a revolution in the streets. Their activism would be strictly limited to enthusiastically blogging it from their basements only.]

Wikileaks, Twitter, Facebook... The revolution may not be televised, but it will be all over the Interweb!

[DUmmies are only too happy to BLOG the revolution. Let others actually do it. DUAC! DUAC!]

I think it is more like the Revolutions of 1848 that swept nobles from power...but it is probably too early to see if it goes farther.

["Farther" means Bolshevik Revolution to this DUmmie wannabee Chekhist.]

What happens when the revolution gets Globalized!? This is the beginning...

[Hopes this DUmmie. Of course, after the revolution, who is going to deliver the pizzas that won't be made in the first place?]

I see a World War coming. Maybe a Glopbal Civil War, but I see blood and bodies and I see it breaking out here. If the shit hits the fan, I'm sailing out of here at the first sign even if I have to steal a boat and shoot my way out.

[And go WHERE? The Workers Paradise of North Korea?]

A major theme is that Western governments, including the US, are trying to co-opt these revolutions, introducing 'Democratic' reforms and 'Democratic' governments friendly to Western interests. Will real Democracy emerge? Stay tuned, friends (to Al Jazeera and the alternative internet media).

[A DUmmie who would prefer that Sharia Law would prevail over Western Democracy.]

When the Working Class & The Poor realize we have more in common with each other than we have in common with the Ruling Elite leadership of BOTH political parties, WE can demand real "CHANGE".

[Ranted the Little Bolshevik who is oppressed by pizza on demand in America.]

As long as TPTB can keep us divided with wedge issues, and keep the National Debate between the very narrow frame of Corporate Democrat vs Corporate Republicans, the Status Quo will be maintained. As long as our Political Parties and the Media can brand Obama & Hillary as Liberal, we have no where to go.

[So much for the Little Bolshevik's belief in the Obamassiah. He obviously wants a street revolution to toss him OUT.]

South of the Border is the name of Oliver Stone's newest and I saw it last night. I highly recommend as he interviews Chavez, Morales, Kirchner, Lungo, de Silva, etc. Very well done and inspiring.

[A great work of complete FICTION that flopped at the box office in Venezuela. Yeah, like the people down there would pay to see a movie about the "Glorious Leader" who has caused them incredible economic hardship.]

I pray these Populist Revolutions have the staying power of the Africanized Honey Bee, and make their way to El Norte.

[So much for any pretense about believing in orderly CONSTITUTIONAL government.]

Would love it if workers of the world indeed, unite

[Workers of the World, Unite! You have nothing to lose but your DUmmies!]

One can hope... but it will never be complete until it happens here.

[Please replace our CONSTITUTIONAL government with ANYTHING...even Sharia Law.]

Please, please bring it HERE! To the 'good ole' United States...

[Please replace our Democracy with any sort of totalitarianism...especially Bolshevism. But, hey, even Islamic Fundamentalism would be swell for me as long as we DESTROY our oppressive constitutional government.]

I'd believe it except I've been reading "Revolution" posts on DU since I started lurking in 2004.

[DUmmies wait for the "Revolution" like Linus waits for the Great Pumpkin. Please let this be the year that the Constitution is finally destroyed.]

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

State of the Eunuch: DUmmies nix Obama's Nudnik Moment

Good speech for a Rethuglican. That's the consensus of the DUmmies on the Compromiser-in-Chief and his State of the Eunuch snoozefest last night. It was Obama's Nudnik Moment: The erstwhile Anointed One has become the Annoying One.

Many threads to choose from; for now we'll go with . . .

THREAD, "So far, it's a super-progressive speech." and

THREAD, "Well DU has become quite the Obama bash fest...." and

this Pitt
THREAD, "Is this as bad as I think it is?"

There's more where those came from, so if PJ wants to do a SOTU DUFU later, he'll have plenty of material.

So let us now walk across the aisle and take a seat next to a DUmmie, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, who should have watched the speech last night to help him get to sleep, is in the [Barackets]:

So far, it's a super-progressive speech.

[Prepare to be shot down, Obamabot impik!]

Progressive? . . . Progressive? That's a freaking laugh!

[DUmmie Go2Peace is having a Jim Mora Moment: "Playoffs? PLAYOFFS??"]

this is DU, unless Obama goes Karl Marx this speech will be panned.

[DUmmie Uzybone, this is your Kewpie Doll Moment! Congratulations!]

Well DU has become quite the Obama bash fest....what the hell happened to DU, seems to have merged with freerepublic.

[Merging Traffic: Troll Booth Ahead]

Some unwelcome guests have infiltrated.

[Undocumented lurkers.]

I think it was a pretty good SOTU. Not the most inspiring and lofty. . . .

[Damning with faint prez.]

I thought the speech was brilliant then came to DU to rave about it...and yikes.....! . . . It's not meant to be a recitation of the Liberal Manifesto. . . .

[Of course not! It's supposed to be a recitation of the COMMUNIST Manifesto!]

Idiots have taken over this place. . . .

[This is news??]

Locking. This post focuses on DU members, not the discussion of ideas.

[OK, let's discuss our ideas ABOUT the idiotic DU members. . . .]

[Speaking of idiots, let's check in with Pitt . . .]

Is this as bad as I think it is?

[Whatever Pitt thinks it is, that's what it is. Pitt starts this thread simply to have people agree with him.]

I have been known on more than one occasion to defend the President even when he didn't necessarily deserve it. I've also kicked him in the ass more than once.

[Yes, Pitt, you have established your credentials as the Opinionator of Record. . . .]

This is an excellent Republican speech.

[Well, it WAS long and boring, Will, so you must have liked that.]

There were a few belly-rubs - new energy policy, and oh we love the children - but he has been kissing GOP ass from beginning to end.

[Even benburch would not stoop that low!]

Please tell me I'm just an insane person.

[You're just an insane person.]

what is this crap? . . . Total poop grenade. Sh*t everywhere.

[Obama believes in defecate spending.]



Yup. Bone to the left. Bone to the right. Bone to the center.

[Boehner in the back, falling asleep.]

Sadly, I can't bear to watch or listen to him any more.

[That makes all of us!]

Maybe Obama should have had backup dancers and strobe lights to make it more "exciting."

[Barry Obama and the Golddiggers! Yes, I can see it now: Babs Mikulski, Big Sis Nappy, Bawney the Dancing Queen, all shaking some serious booty!]

I feel like I'm on a sinking ship!

[This is your Titanik Moment.]

It is certainly not inspiring. Of course I have had 4 shots of Canadian Mist. So it's back to FarmVille and DU for me.

[Stuck on Stupor: The State of DU-nion.]

Talked for well over an hour, didn't say a damn thing

[It's a gift!]

It was boring. . . .

[Barack Obama puts the BO in BO-ring!]

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Keef Grief, Part Too: The Meltdown continues . . .

There is too much Keef Grief in DUmmieland for any one DUFU to cover! Indeed, this could be a multiple DUFU day! (And then there's the SOTU tonight.)

The Meltdown continues, and in this edition, we'll sample from a number of Olbie threads, starting with this
THREAD, "Olbermann Out At MSNBC."

So let us return to the Keef Grief Support Group, otherwise known as DUmmieland, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson--willing to take Keef on as our DUmmie FUnnies intern/gofer, but would have to clear it with PJ and the Beaver--is in the [brackets]:

"MSNBC and Keith Olbermann have ended their contract," said the network in a statement late Friday. "The last broadcast of Countdown with Keith Olbermann will be this evening. MSNBC thanks Keith for his integral role in MSNBC's success and we wish him well in his future endeavors."

[Translation: Don't let the door hit you on the way out.]

Hopefully, he'll be picked up by someone else

[The police, for vagrancy?]

Nope. Non-compete clause.

[Nope. Non-competent clause.]

So... this was his last day on the air ever?


ha ha did the precious agree to the non compete clause for a crap load of cash?

[Hmm, you seem like you're a non-Keef fan.]

I will never turn on MSNBC again.

[Join the club!]

He just spoke too much truth to power. . . .

[Drink up!]

take a good look folks...the only "Edward R. Murrow" of our generation has left the building.

[I think of Keith more as the Edward R. Moron of our generation.]

Did Obama get KO fired?


He's not dead. Keith will reappear--somewhere, bigger and better than ever.

[Yes! Clap your hands if you believe in Keef! C'mon, everyone! Clap! Louder!]

Why, God, Why?

[Why Do Bad Things Happen to Bad People?]

He should promptly be added to Broadcast Journalism's Hall of Fame, if there is such a thing.

[Sorry, I think he was on the juice.]

Makes me want to vomit! I mean why??

[Could be the five slices of Domino's on top of the doobie and the beer. Back off, man!]

This is f***ing MINDBLOWING!!!!

[Then it shouldn't affect you.]

Who will be replacing him?

[I nominate Ted "Golden Voice" Williams.]

I think I'm going to cry.

[Thank you, Johnnie Ray.]

See the 14,231 threads for details.

[Every one of Keef's viewers posted a thread.]

F***. F***ityf***f***f***.

[My asterisk button is wearing out.]

If CNN were smart . . .

[OK, stop right there. . . .]

Re: Keith resigning/ousted/whatever just doesn't matter. If you look at the actual number of people who watch all of the talking bobble-heads on all of the cable "news" shows, it's just over 5 million people combined. That's just over (drumroll, please) 1.5% of the population! Big deal. Most people don't even know who these people are, much less give a damn what they're instructing their viewers to think.

[And YOU, DUmmie itsallhappening (46 posts), you get the Kewpie Doll for this Brief Moment of Mental Clarity®! Although I'm not sure you'll make it to 47 posts. . . .]

True, but there are only 166,913 users here on DU

[913 DUmmies and 166,000 LOUSY FREEPER TROLLS!!!]

Keith is like a God to some who post here. . . .

[Hey, better than that! You guys HATE God, but you LOVE Keith!]


[Needs more punctuation: AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!]

Rachel is on Bill Maher tonight

[I highly doubt that.]

It will be interesting to see what Rachel does.

[Some people are into that.]

Welcome to Du and the support grief group for Olbermann.

[I did NOT see this post when I wrote my intro to this DUFU!]

Dearest Keith - I know you read DU: So simply put: WE LOVE YOU AND WILL FOLLOW YOU WHEREVER YOUR CAREER LEADS YOU.

[We love you, Keefie, oh yes we do . . .]

I will follow you anywhere. Except Faux. Please find a home soon!

[Keef the Homeless will soon be taking up residence in the back seat of a car with Bobo the Hobo.]

Start a Petition to get him back...Just start a Petition. BRING KEITH BACK TO MSNBC.


I'm in total shock!! . . . Keith held my sanity during the Bush years. . . .

Keith, I thank you for giving me my sanity back during those very dark Bush years. . . .

[The DUmmies like to use this "kept my sanity" line. Last week it was ten years of DU that kept their sanity. Now it's Keefie. But the real question is: Did they ever have any sanity to KEEP?]

You are my generation's Walter Kronkite.

[You are my generation's Watta Krackpot.]


[Signed, Keith]

Mr. Olberman, take a cue from Cenk Uygur. . . .

[Take a q and put in some more vowels.]

keep speaking truth to greedy, arrogant power.

[Another drink!]

many thanks for speaking truth to power all these years, sir!


So Keith, What's Neeeeeeext??????

[A life of eeeeeees!!!!!!]

Hey Keith! How you doin'?

[Hey DUmmie ellie! I'm DUin'!]

I am furious that he's gone.

[You were furious when he was there. Furious is DUmmie homeostasis.]

The world needs Keith!

[What the world . . . needs now . . . is Keef, sweet Keef . . .]

There's a Keith shaped hole in my heart tonight.

[And a brain-shaped hole in your head.]

I just don't know whether to cry, scream or kick the sh*t out of something. THIS ABSOF***INGLUTELY SUCKS!!!!!

[Go for it all.]

I'm off to the corner to weep.

[Be sure to wail and gnash your teeth, too.]

A good man who spoke truth to power. . . . nobody on cable news spoke truth to power with the passion and intensity of Keith.

[A *double* STTP!! L'chaim!]

Please find some other medium (YouTube, etc) to continue speaking truth to power.

[Man, I'm getting SLOSHED here!]



Keith, I will miss the hell out of spoke truth to power. . . .


TMZ says Keith wanted more money. Sorry, I can't support that. How much is enough? He's already making $8 million dollars a year. Sounds like he's being a tad greedy.

[Ruh roh. . . .]

I won't miss Keith Olbermann. He's an ass who thinks he's smarter than you.


Funny thing... KO's tenure on TV at MSNBC came to and end because he wanted more money. KO? Our side? What a joke. In the end, he showed himself to be one of "them". I'll do what I do if you give me MORE MONEY, and if you don't give me more money, f*** you and here's to me.


many of us worship the ground upon which he walks. We feel he is infallible, and our world has no meaning without him and his large vocabulary. I'm not sure how we can go on living...I suppose heavy medication will be necessary.

[I detect a note of sarcasm. Hee! Hee!]

Keef Grief: DUmmies KO'd by Olbermann firing!

It's . . . TEOTWAWKI !!!!!! OMG OMG OMG !!! Keef has been FIRED!!!!! OH NOES!!

The canning of Keith Olbermann Friday night came like a swift punch to the solar plexus. The DUmmies were KO'd! They were devastated! Overwhelming Keef Grief! Elisabeth Kübler-Ross would have a field day with these folks. (BTW, why can they never get to "acceptance"?)

Their initial denial quickly turned to anger, of course--these are the DUmmies we're talking about. They're AS MAD AS HELL AND NOT GOING TO TAKE IT ANYMORE!!! It's a KOmkast KOnspiracy! Bush's fault! Rove! Palin! Fox! ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHH!!!!! The fact that Keefie happens to be the Worst A$$hole on Television--well, tied for worst, with Bill Maher--that doesn't enter in.

The KO shocker instantly took over ALL of DUmmieland. DOZENS AND DOZENS of threads--almost as many as Keef's viewers! We'll start with this
THREAD, "Keith Olbermann: 'This IS the Last Edition of Countdown.'"

So let us now go to the Special KOmments of the grieving DUmmies, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, is in the [brackets]:

Breaking: Keith Olbermann Out at MSNBC

[. . . {stuned silence} . . . ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!]

Stunning his Countdown audience, Keith Olbermann announced at the very end of his show tonight that this would be the last edition of Countdown.

[NO! . . . {hyperventilating} . . . NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!]

OLBERMANN: "I think the same fantasy has popped into the head of everybody in my business who has ever been told what I've been told: that this is going to be the last edition of your show. You go directly to the scene from the movie 'Network,' complete with the pajamas and the raincoat. And you go off on an existential other-worldy verbal journey of unutterable profundity and vision. You damn the impediments, and you insist upon the insurrections, and then you emit Peter Finch's gutteral resonant ... 'So...' And you implore, you WILL the viewer to go to the window, open it, stick out his head and yell...


"Good night. And good luck."

[No no noooooo . . . {uncontrollable sobbing} . . .]

The first action of a Dictatorship is shut down the Free Press. It wouldn't be long before the O'Reillies, Hannities and Lushballs will be calling for the violent reaction against anyone who opposes their Right Wing Fanaticism.

[D*MN them! FACISTS! They shot Gabby Giffords, now they've killed Keef! VIOLENT facist b*st*rds!! ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHH!!!!!!!!]

I will donate my television to a nursing home with specific instructions to give it to an alzheimer patient so that he/she can forget the crap as soon as they see it.

[NOTHING will be worth watching without Keef!]

Comcast merged with NBC then fired Keith

[It's a KOmkast KOnspiracy! And Fox probably owns KOmkast! D*MN them!

Wonder when Rachel will get booted?

[I think she wears the boots only on certain nights.]

WTF? Does anyone know why this happened?

[Gaia hates you.]

We still have BBC

[Think about that for a minute, folks. "We still have BBC."]

Europe or Canada is looking better and better to me

[Can we help you pack?]

The real question is whether Keith has a gag clause

[I had a gag clause whenever I tried to watch Keith.]

He will have a fabulous internet career.

[We here at DUmmie FUnnies could use an intern, I suppose. Someone to keep Li'l Beaver in cigars, coupon clipper for PJ. . . .]

We can also draft KO to run for office -- how about president?

[KO to primary BO? YESSS!!!]

Maybe he can work w/ Dan Rather?

[What's the frequency, Keith?]

The freeperoids will be celebrating.

[On the contrary. Keef has always been GREAT for the DUmmie FUnnies!]

Anyone want to start a rumor that Keith Olbermann left MSNBC to become White House Press Secretary. . . ?

[It's down to Keef and William Rivers Pitt.]

Wow who will speak for the little guy now?

[Robert B. Reichhhhhhhhhhhh-uh!]

Ummmm WTF just happened? was Olbermann taken off the air or what?

[Just waking up. The drugs are wearing off.]

I'm finished w/ this whorporate bullsh*t. . . . The whorporate right has pulled the chair away just as we thought we had a spot to sit and rest.

[C'mon, you'll kick the football this time, Charlie Brown!]


[New all-purpose curseword, "comf***ingcastic."]

I could just cry.

[You know what makes me cry? YOU DO! You jackwagon. . . .]

I'm so stunned.

[My beeber is stuck on "stune."]

This is so heartbreaking for me, but I guess I'll learn to love my comcastic overloards. . . .

[Man overloard!]



Well, That's It For Me...I no longer understand the world around me. I'm not even sure that it is even important anymore.

[It's TEOTWAWKI !!!]

I. Am. Stunned.

[You. Are. Stupid.]

Countdown was the top rated program on MSNBC

[Sometimes the jokes just write themselves.]

OMG. I'm gonna miss KO SO MUCH!!! He's a voice of reason in the insanity. Comcast SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS and SUCKS SOME MORE!!!!!!

[Yes, the voice of reason.]

Keith is an all-round swell egg.

[Keith is an all-round swelled ego.]

[Well, I can see this KO thing will require a Part Too. Miles to go before we freep. . . .]

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Olbermann: DUmmies Rage at DUmmie FUnnies

I guess DUmmie Amerigo Vespucci hasn't gotten the message that the names "DUmmie FUnnies" (nor "Conservative Cave") must NEVER be mentioned in DUmmieland. In fact it won't surprise me a bit if his THREAD, "Freeper bottom-feeder "PJ-Comix" plans to "harvest juicy comedy nuggets" from DU today RE: K.O." is soon pulled. What set DUmmie Amerigo Vespucci into such a rage was my announced plan yesterday to DUFU the DUmmies going BERSERK over the exit of Keith Olbermann from MSNBC. Yes, I will be DUFUing that later today but for now let us enjoy watching the DUmmies rage at the DUmmie FUnnies in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting that if Mrs. Vespucci had named her son Ralph we would today be living in the United States of Ralph, is in the [brackets]:

Freeper bottom-feeder "PJ-Comix" plans to "harvest juicy comedy nuggets" from DU today RE: K.O.

[It should be a very productive harvest starting out with the comedy gold nuggets provided by DUmmie Amerigo Vespucci.]

This man / woman is the host / hostess of a regular F.R. feature, "DUmmies Funnies."

[GASP! You said the forbidden name out loud in DUmmieland. VERBOTEN!]

He / she randomly plucks DU quotes and adds his / her witty and insouciant remarks like "what a DUmmie!"

["What a DUmmie!" That might have been the first time I posted those exact words in like maybe a year.]

Oh, that ZESTY FreeRepublic wit.

[Hey, it caused you to lose a night of sleep.]

Further proof that while mutual attraction may exist, cousins should not marry.

[DUmmie logic in action.]

HA HA HA! Hey, PJ! I just made a DUmmie Funny, you f*cking TOOL. You're right, this IS a lot of fun.

[Screeched the angry DUmmie in the performance cage. And now to his fellow DUmmie performers who exist strictly for our amusement...]

Might make more sense if he simply got a life.

[I guess you haven't heard that the DUmmies in my DUmmie Ant Farm exist SOLELY to provide comedy nuggets for the DUmmie FUnnies.]

There's a whole website devoted to doing that. Google "Conservative Cave"

[Now you're in BIG trouble. You just posted that other FORBIDDEN name.]

I stumbled across it a couple of weeks ago. A really revolting site that I considered posting an OP exposing them but decided not to as I didn't want to give them any free publicity.

[Congrats on doing just the Conservative Cave free publicity.]

I found that site around a year ago while Googling my DUsername. Seems they're obsessed with this place, hanging on our every word. In contrast, I haven't visited that Loserville even one time after seeing how comically worthless it is - like the freeps' weaker, more boring cousin.

[Good news, DUmmie Cirque du So-What. Your DUmmie Losername also appears in the DUmmie FUnnies.]

Actually, I always read that thread on FR. I find it cute how fascinated they are.

[May I put you on the DUFU PING List?]

And how sane the comments PJ chooses tend to be, and sometimes, he admits to agreeing with the DU members. It's as close to a conversation as they will get with those who disagree.

[Could you send that endorsement to WILLIAM RIVERS PITT?]

Guess we'd all better be extra series today.

[Especially YOU, DUmmie DCKit.]

Yo, PJ - KISS MY HAIRY ASS! Juicy enough for ya?

[Sorry. Ben Burch got there first.]

It's not the first time the village idiot laughed at the town folk. It won't be the last.

[The next laugh will come in exactly 24 business hours.]

The guy is so not funny, his stuff just comes across as stupid
but then conservative comedy is an oxymoron.

[The stupid parts come from quoting DUmmies like you word for word.]

(This DUFU edition will be updated with more angry comedy nuggets from this thread so keep providing the material for me to harvest, DUmmies.)

He's just a boisterous asshole lacking in wit of any kind. It's like that episode of "Cheers" in which Cliff Claven decided to do stand-up comedy. And the little shit is so full of himself...each episode of "DUmmies Funnies" is heralded with all of the pomp and glamour that F.R. can muster (which isn't much).

[DUmmie Amerigo Vespucci has just mentioned "DUmmie FUnnies" for a SECOND time. Okay, I have to say it out loud...DUmmie Amerigo Vespucci is a...LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

But all I can say to him / her is have fun trolling, troll.

[We ALWAYS have a BLAST DUFUing the DUmmies.]

DUmmieland is ten years old!

DUmmieland Troika, left to right (but all far left):
EarlG, Elad, Skinner

DUmmieland is ten years old! It was on January 20, 2001, that DUmmieland was founded, as a safe house and whining post upon the Inauguration of Chimpus Khan.

Skinner and the DUmmies are having a week-long celebration to mark the momentous occasion! Lots of
THREADS to choose from, starting with a special homepage and going on from there.

So let us go now to our DUmmie Ant Farm, where the birthday festivities are in full swing, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson--laughing, because the sudden dismissal of Keith Olbermann (which we may get to in our next DUFU) is spoiling their birthday party--is in the [brackets]:

Democratic Underground was launched on January 20, 2001, to protest the illegitimate Supreme Court selection of George W. Bush. . . .

[Skinner, do yourself a favor and call this number now: 1-800-BUSH-WON. Grief counselors are standing by.]

a comment on Free Republic . . . said something along the lines of, "Go back in eight months time and they won't even be there," . . .

[Hey, Skinner, we're GLAD you persisted! We FReepers have found HOURS OF ENDLESS ENTERTAINMENT by visiting our DUmmie Ant Farm. You guys provide a hilarious peek into the mind (if you can call it that) of the Looney Left!]

A decade later, DU hosts the biggest independently-run liberal discussion forum on the planet.

[Which one?]

Nearly 26 million individual visitors stopped by in 2010. . . .

[25 million of which were LOUSY FREEPER TROLLS!!!]

reading more than a quarter of a billion pages.

[Then they got to Pitt's SECOND essay.]

[The DUmmies chime in . . .]

there are some of us with a DECADE OUT OF OUR LIVES...which is SMALL FOR YOU...but BIG FOR US...You WILL "Perhaps" UNDERSTAND what this site meant to us........Yet the TOMBSTONE LIVES...and the DEAD ARE GONE...and the GRAVES ARE THERE...BUT, SOME CARRY ON. . . . YES...I DO UNDERSTAND...MOVING ON and how it HAS TO BE...but not good to leave so many "in the dust" to do that. . . . It's gone on a bit...and who knows where it will END...for ALL OF US! FOR ALL OF US! . . . SO MUCH OF MY LIFE HERE with so MANY GOOD FOLKS that I passed time with ...some dead, some "under the stone," some still alive and kicking and working and others gone off to "parts unknown." It IS what IT IS! Not to be bitter or angry or even to shed tears or get nostalgic, too much. It Is what It Is! And the TRI-UMVERATE of DU knows that BETTER THAN ANYONE!

[THE TOMBSTONE LIVES! Happy birthday, Skinner!]

We better clean up the living room and watch our language. We may be getting some visitors.

[Quick! Get the doobies out of the ashtrays!]

Skinner Rules!!

[Skinner makes up the Rules!!]

Extremely Swell News!!!!!!! Is swell too strong?

[No, but the smell is.]



do those of us who have been here from the beginning get cake and ice cream?

[How about a granite cookie?]

"Not a star vehicle..." "...a community" !!

[That was Skinner's not-so-veiled slam against Markos Mousetits of KOmmieland.]

Happy Decade DU!! You light up my life.

[You give me hope to carry on . . .]

Happy Anniversary to us all!

[Gaia bless us, every one!]

DU is most definitely something else on the net!!!

[The Hindenburg is most definitely something else in the air!!!]

Since 2002 I have been happy visiting DU on a daily basis.

[Drugs have their place, I guess.]

What a long strange trip it's been. . . .

[You ain't kiddin'!]

I can't imagine DU ever not being in existance. Hear that Skinner, Earl and Elad, this place has to be around F-O-R-E-V-E-R!!!!!!

[Signed, PJ-Comix and Charles Henrickson]

The ones who are gone for various reasons are much on my mind tonight. Some need to be here with us still. It's hard to enjoy my almost 9 years here when so many are gone.

[DUmmie madfloridian is MAD about all the tombstones!]

Here's to 10 years of sanity. . . .

[Don't you think you should wish for something a little more realistic?]

I lurk. I read. I laugh. I grieve. I hope.

[I hurl.]

Woo hoo! DU is a preteen!

[DUmmieland is the Bart Simpson of the internets.]

Thanks to D.U. I've lost 40 lbs. in 3 months, I've got fuller thicker hair than I have in years, my arthritis is gone and I'm pain free for the first time in years. I can spend more time with the kids, I'm no longer waking up in the middle of the night due to frequent, painful urination, I look fifteen years younger, my spouse and I are having the best sex of our lives. D.U. cured my foot odor while providing fast soothing relief for my eczema, psoriasis and gout.


Wednesday, January 19, 2011

DUmmies Support Partial ObamaCare Repeal

In a strange political twist, many DUmmies now FAVOR the repeal of ObamaCare. Not because it would be a major factor in strangling the American economy but because it is NOT a single payer aka socialized medicine program. Of course, the DUmmies are too STUPID to realize that the REAL purpose of ObamaCare is to FAIL so that the government would have to step in and flat out take over the American healthcare system in total. Since many DUmmies are clueless as to the real goal of ObamaCare, many now favor replacing it with the "public option" as you can see in this THREAD, "CNN poll: Half favor repealing health care law. Which is why we should compromise and repeal the mandate." Unfortunately for the DUmmies, repealing just the mandate will be VETOED by Obama which means that the ObamaCare fiasco will continue to poison the political well for the Democrats going into the 2012 elections. So let us now watch the DUmmies screaming for at least partial ObamaCare repeal in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, kicking off this DUFU edition with a "REPEAL OBAMACARE!" song written by our own Charles Henrickson based on a suggestion by Yours Truly, is in the [barackets]:

Tune: "Marion" ("Rejoice, O Pilgrim Throng")

Repeal Obamacare!
Repeal, reject, undo!
Declare it dead and pull the plug,
Before the bill comes due.
Repeal! Repeal!
Repeal Obamacare!

The bill Obama signed
Would take a year to read,
But Nancy rammed it down our throats,
And so did Harry Reid.
Repeal! Repeal!
Repeal Obamacare!

Now watch our health care costs
Rise high and higher still;
Obama spreads the wealth around
And makes us pay the bill.
Repeal! Repeal!
Repeal Obamacare!

Repeal, and do not fear
Obama's veto pen;
And when he sends back what we pass,
We'll pass it once again.
Repeal! Repeal!
Repeal Obamacare!

Repeal Obamacare!
Repeal, reject, undo!
And come November 2012,
Repeal Obama too!
Repeal! Repeal!
Repeal Obamacare!

"CNN poll: Half favor repealing health care law. Which is why we should compromise and repeal the mandate.

[Just the mandate? Don't be shy. Repeal it ALL.]

The real problem is with the mandate that shovels trillions into insurance company coffers that they will use to crush the good elements of the bill.

[The real problem is that you are too clueless to figure out that the goal of ObamaCare is to break the private insurance companies which will have to be replaced by You-Know-Who.]

By coming out and fighting against the mandate (which has been ruled unconstitutional), we will get ourselves back on the side of the majority on this issue - and win over some independents and even a few tea baggers.

[Great way to win them calling them "teabaggers." Diplomacy DUmmie style.]

If we can succeed in eliminating the mandate, it will put Medicare for All or a public option back on the table, as we claw back big insurance profits.

[Public Option aka Socialized Medicine run by the government.]

The mandate is ONLY important to for-profit insurance corporations. A mandate would only make sense in a single payer nonprofit system

[May I mark you down as FOR Repeal?]

The current HRC bill provides for some back door openings to non-profit co-operatives. Between those, and individual states experimenting, a form of single payer may take hold yet. I certainly hope so.

[Thank you for admitting what the TRUE GOAL of ObamaCare is...A back door method leading to single payer aka socialized medicine.]

Dump the Mandate

[DUmp ObamaCare.]

And they arrested the Single Payer advocates

[Alan Grayson is currently residing in Gitmo.]

Except that forcing people to buy a consumer product is unconstitutional

[And since despite writing over 2000 pages of ObamaCare, the liberals overlooked including a simple severance clause which means if ANY part of ObamaCare is declared unconstitutional, the whole thing goes down the tubes. BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!]

Dealing with the system we have means preventing the repubs from repealing the whole bill, a compromise by getting rid of the mandate is the best way to achieve this, otherwise, we may have obama compromise away parts of the bill that are good.

[Obama would VETO repealing just the mandate. Face it DUmmies, you have to continue swallowing that ObamaCare poison pill for years to come.]

Obama and the alleged Democrats in Congress are the ones who have tied us to a system of insurance with no guarantee of care.

[Knock out the word "alleged" and I would have to declare you to be a LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

We couldn't even get a watered-down public option passed when we had large Democratic majorities in the House and Senate. What makes you think it would have a chance now?

[DUmmie Delusion can conjure up any improbable scenario.]

No matter how you spin the name it is still a government mandate and would require a HUGE tax increase to implement and keep going.

[I'm going out on a limb here and declaring you to be a LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

The whole plan will collapse without the mandate because the rates will skyrocket if people can stay out of the program until they need it. It won't put Medicare for All back on the table. It will just destroy any chance of this plan working, and the Rethugs will say "we told you so."

[We told you so.]

And the mandate doesn't require anyone to buy insurance.
It only requires them to pay an excise tax which they won't have to pay if they can show they have insurance.

[The next DUmmie wants you to clam up about calling it a tax.]

You're not supposed to call it a tax.. because that would mean the President has broken his promise not to raise taxes on anyone making under $250K.

[GASP! Obama would break a promise? I'm shocked, SHOCKED!!!]

in our country we're not going to get rid of private insurers in one fell swoop. it will never happen. the only way we'll get single payer is over time.

[Shhhh! Don't say too loudly in public what the TRUE GOAL of ObamaCare is.]

It is not a mandate, it is a tax. Big difference. The mandate is like allowing a private company tax the people. Bad idea.

[But...but Obama promised us that it was NOT a tax.]

Friday, January 14, 2011

It's a Zodiac moment: "What's your sign?"

"This is the dawning of the Age of . . . Ophiuchus??" There's been a change in the cosmos, and count on DUmmieland to be on top of it! We get the news from outer space here in this THREAD, "What's your sign?"

So let us boldly go where no sane person has gone before (save for LOUSY FREEPER TROLLS!!!) and gaze at the DUmmies gazing up at the heavens, in I Am Sirius Red, while the commentary of your Hubble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, whose only sign is the sign of the cross, is in the [brackets]:

What's your sign?

["I'M WITH STUPID." Guess which way the arrow is pointing.]

Did anyone know that the astrological signs have changed?

[Does anybody really care?]

Did anyone know a new sign was added?

[If that's a good thing, thank Obama. If that's a bad thing, blame Bush Palin.]

Capricorn: Jan. 20-Feb. 16
Aquarius: Feb. 16-March 11
Pisces: March 11-April 18
Aries: April 18-May 13
Taurus: May 13-June 21
Gemini: June 21-July 20
Cancer: July 20-Aug. 10
Leo: Aug. 10-Sept. 6
Virgo: Sept. 16-Oct. 30
Libra: Oct. 30-Nov. 23
Scorpio: Nov. 23-29
Ophiuchus: Nov. 29-Dec. 17
Sagittarius: Dec. 17-Jan. 20


the stars have shifted in the night sky so much that horoscope signs are nearly a month off.

[Palin's fault. Her kid was dancing with the stars.]

The shift is caused by precession, the wobble in the Earth's axis. . . .

[Aw jeez, not this shift again!]

The Earth is like a wobbly top.

[And the DUmmies are the Wobblies.]

[And now the DUmmies reply . . .]

Is that an Ophiuchus in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?

[As you can see in the graphic, Ophiuchus is some guy holding a snake. It looks like he's taken it out of his pocket.]

It used to be Scorpio. . . .

[Just like poor DUmmie Mr. Scorpio. Now we'll have to call him Mr. Ophiuchus.]

how do I break it to my Mom that she's now an "O'PhooeyCuss??"

[Tell her it's a Zodiac moment.]

What happened to the missing ten days in September?

[If you were born September 7-15, you're SOL--which is not a reference to the Sun, by the way.]

Oh no, I'm not alive.

[Tombstoned Undersky.]

People love to talk about themselves; if all else fails, a discussion of star signs will prompt social intercourse. . . .

[At least.]

'I'm a Virgo. . . .'

[Not for long, once social intercourse has been prompted.]

Heres my sign . . .

[I believe you!]

I am a VIRGO now. damn what to do?

[This is a tipping point, DUmmie nadinbrzezinksi. Go get tipped.]

I was a Virgo now I'm a Leo. gosh will my personality have to undergo a change. . . .

[Don't worry, you'll still be the same obnoxious you.]

I'm a fish still swimming with the tide. . . .

[Carpal Tidal Syndrome.]

Gravity from the moon pulled the earth off it's normal axis, somewhat, and threw the zodiac(constellation) off by a month.

[The moonbats are deeply disturbed.]

I read this years ago, that it would happen as we approach 2012.

[The Democrats' horoscope for November 6, 2012: Aries the Ram will converge with Uranus.]

I was always a Taurus on the cusp with Aries so moving me firmly into Aries wouldn't be that big a deal.

[Bill Clinton would like to move firmly into Virgo, but that WOULD be a big deal now at his age.]

If you considered yourself a Cancer under the tropical zodiac last week, you're still a Cancer. . . .

[Even though Pitt has quit smoking, he's still a Cancer.]

I am so NOT a Taurus.

[I don't know about that. I'd say you're FULL of Bull.]

So, now I'm a Capricorn after I've been an Aquarius for 39 years?

[This is the ending of the age of Aquarius.]

It's after noon somewhere in the world! That's the only sign I need!

[Let the drinking begin!]

I was born under the Stop sign!

[Now you're under this one . . .]

List of key words describing the sign of Ophiuchus . . . serpent holder . . . tax assessor, or levys taxes. . . .

[Yep, sounds like a Democrat!]

Pass with care

[That would NOT be a Democrat!]

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

"Simply Hypocritical": Head KOmmie Kos and KOmmie BoyBlue swell the ranks

"What? Me, guilty of the very hate speech I condemn?
But, but, I am the Great and Powerful Kos!!"

Last time, we documented the DUbble Standard of DUmmieland, where William Pitt the Hypocrite, in typical high DUdgeon, has denounced the rhetoric of the Right, but who himself has engaged in violent rhetoric against (at least) George W. Bush, George H. W. Bush, and Sarah Palin, and threatened actual physical violence against a homeless woman, DUmmie bobbolink.

Today we travel next door to KOmmieland, where Head KOmmie Kos and KOmmie BoyBlue swell the ranks of the hypocrites on the Left. Of course, like the DUmmies, the KOmmies have blamed conservatives for the terrible crime in Tucson, without a shred of evidence of any linkage whatsoever. But both Head KOmmie Kos and KOmmie BoyBlue are guilty of using violent language themselves! Here are the relevant links . . .

From Head KOmmie Kos, January 11, 2011:
Tea Party Express fundraises off Arizona tragedy, lies about Daily Kos

From Head KOmmie Kos, June 25, 2008:
2010 will be primary season

From Free Republic, exposing Head KOmmie Kos endorsing even MORE violent imagery:
New info: DAILY KOS Founder Endorsed T-shirt TARGETING Sarah Palin's Face in Rifle Crosshairs

From KOmmie BoyBlue, January 9, 2011:
My Apologies to This Site, The Victims, and Rep. Gabrielle Giffords

From KOmmie BoyBlue, January 6, 2011:
My CongressWOMAN voted against Nancy Pelosi! And is now DEAD to me!

But before we proceed, let us sing this musical tribute to the Righteously Indignant Left, written by yours truly, the wag tailoring the doggerel, Charles Henrickson. Click the music link and sing along!

Tune: "Simply Irresistible"

They say we're vitriolical
And deeply diabolical
They say that we're so horrible
Our hate speech is deplorable

See them rant, see them rage
Anger fills every page
But the hate they detect
Is a trait they project

They like to condemn the Right
But now I find they're
Simply hypocritical
Simply hypocritical

They say when we're rhetorical
It can't be metaphorical
The language must be literal
Unless it's by a liberal

They can wish Bush would die
Or hang Palin on high
With no sin of their own
They can cast the first stone

They like to condemn the Right
But now I find they're
Simply hypocritical
Simply hypocritical

(Simply hypocritical) They're so pure, there's no imagery that's violent
(Simply hypocritical) They're so sure there's no hatred of their own

It's unbelievable, the story that they spread
They say we're guilty, that the blood is on our head
But Beck and Limbaugh now, they're wishing they were dead

They like to fight the Right
Now I find they're
Simply hypocritical

They're so pure, there's no imagery that's violent
(Simply hypocritical) They're so sure there's no hatred of their own

Hypocrisy on overkill
The word is pharisaical
The evidence is plentiful
Their posturing is Pittiful

See them rant, see them rage
Anger fills every page
But the hate they detect
Is a trait they project

They like to condemn the Right
But now I find they're
Simply hypocritical

They're so pure, there's no imagery that's violent
(Simply hypocritical) They're so sure there's no hatred of their own
(Simply hypocritical) They're so pure, there's no imagery that's violent
(Simply hypocritical) They're so sure there's no hatred of their own

Simply hypocritical

So let us now metaphorically storm the gates of KOmmieland, where the boys are swell and the hypocrisy is rank, and where the KOmmie KOmments are in Self-Righteous Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, wondering if Kos and BoyBlue can appreciate the Robert Palmer Girls, is in the [brackets]:

Tea Party Express fundraises off Arizona tragedy, lies about Daily Kos

[Head KOmmie Kos politicizes the Arizona tragedy, hides his own violent rhetoric]

From a Tea Party express fundraising email: "The media didn't tell you that the left-wing website, DailyKos, had targeted Congresswoman Giffords, putting a BULLSEYE on her, did they? But that's just what happened." The media didn't tell you that because it never happened. It's fantasy. It's a lie. And of course, since they can't verify the existence of such a bullseye image on this site, they'll claim it was scrubbed.

[Do you, Head KOmmie Kos, promise to tell the truth, the WHOLE truth. . . ? Yes, Kos, please tell us the WHOLE truth about your "targeting" Giffords and "putting a bullseye" on her, and don't hide behind the "image." "Image" isn't everything. So let us look at your 2008 post, which DID appear on your site . . .]

2010 will be primary season. . . . the corrupt, the tone-deaf, and the reactionary within Democratic ranks will face the possibility of primary battles.

["Battles," Kos? Isn't that a bit militaristic?]

Who to primary? Well, I'd argue that we can narrow the target list by looking at those Democrats . . . .

[The "target list"? The "TARGET" list, Kos?? So you DID "target" certain Democrat congresspersons?]

I've bolded members of the Blue Dogs for added emphasis.

["Blue Dogs," dehumanizing language. And among the bolded Blue Dogs you emphatically list is . . . "Giffords, Gabrielle (AZ-08)." There it is, Kos! In your own words! Your "TARGET LIST," with Congresswoman Giffords listed by name! Bolded, even, for emphasis!]

this vote certainly puts a bulls eye on their district.

["BULLS EYE," Kos, "bulls eye"!! Again, Kos, your own words! True, no bulls eye "image," but, Kos, you haven't told us the WHOLE truth about your violent WORDS! "Battles," "target list," "bulls eye" . . . what were you thinking, Head KOmmie Kos?? Are you trying to incite VIOLENCE? Why, by your own standards for condemning the Right, you must be!]

[But wait! That's not all! In the FR thread linked above, "New info: DAILY KOS Founder Endorsed T-shirt TARGETING Sarah Palin's Face in Rifle Crosshairs," there is a screenshot of YOU, Kos, endorsing a t-shirt depicting Sarah Palin in a rifle's crosshairs. This was AFTER the Tucson tragedy, and you ENDORSED this t-shirt with these words . . .]

Wow. This makes STARK mockery of the Palin "surveryor's mark" spin.

[Apparently, Kos, you think it's OK to have an image of Sarah Palin's FACE in the crosshairs, but for Palin to pinpoint a congressional DISTRICT on a MAP--that is inciting violence! Well, thank you for this evidence of your rank HYPOCRISY, Markos Mousetits. And now we turn to one your little KOmmies, BoyBlue, who at least has had the decency to APOLOGIZE, sorta, for his own violent rhetoric . . .]

My Apologies to This Site, The Victims, and Rep. Gabrielle Giffords

[Well, BoyBlue, you're a better man than your buddy, Head KOmmie Kos, who hides behind an "image."]

Most of you know by now my diary bemoaning Rep. Giffords' voting against Nancy Pelosi has been taken by the far right to preemptively protect themselves when it is inevitably found out that the perps against Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords are tied to the far right. . . .

[WHOA, WHOA! I thought this supposed to be an APOLOGY, BoyBlue, not an attack! You know, say you're sorry for what YOU said, and that's that.]

I made a VERY poor choice of words when I partially titled the diary, "now dead to me."

[OK, after some more lines attacking the Right, KOmmie BoyBlue finally gets around to apologizing for his language.]

Of course i wished no harm to Gabby.

[And of course, likewise, KOmmie BoyBlue, you have NO EVIDENCE WHATSOEVER, NONE, that Sarah Palin wished any actual harm on Congresswoman Giffords herself.]

[And now here is what KOmmie BoyBlue wrote . . .]

My CongressWOMAN voted against Nancy Pelosi! And is now DEAD to me!

[Well, there it is, KOmmie BoyBlue! "DEAD," in capital letters! Therefore YOU, KOmmie BoyBlue--you who live IN TUCSON, writing just TWO DAYS before the shooting--YOU must have incited the violence of someone likewise THAT INTENSELY ANGRY against Congresswoman Giffords! Yes, that theory makes a whole lot more sense than blaming something Sarah Palin put on a map months ago.]

[There you have it, boys and girls. More proof--it is ever plentiful--of the following truth of life: Hypocrisy, thy name is KOmmieland . . . and DUmmieland . . . and HUffieland. . . . Simply Hypocritical!]

Monday, January 10, 2011

Pitt Lectures Conservatives On Violence...Months After Tombstoned For Violence

It seems hard to think of a person less qualified to hop on his moral high horse with a gigantic chip on his shoulder and lecture conservatives on the subject of violence than WILLIAM RIVERS PITT. Remember, it was only months ago, last May, when Pitt was tombstoned from DUmmieland for threatening physical violence on a homeless woman...bobolink. Why did he do that? Because Pitt has absolutely no control over himself. This hasn't been his first time making violent threats yet here is is lecturing conservatives about violence in his THREAD, "THE WRATH OF FOOLS: An Open Letter To the Far Right." His thread is chock full of self-righteous rants both on the subject of violence (with which he is quite familar) and morality. Yeah, just what we need. A morality lecturer from the perpetrator of the Karl Rove Indictment Scoop Fraud. Oh, and on the subject of morality, just an idle thought here. Have you ever noticed that Pitt NEVER talks about his time as a teacher in Newton, MA? It is the only real job he ever had (gofer in the family law firm and wannabee "working class" bouncer play job don't really count as true employment). So let us now watch the person LEAST qualified to lecture the rest of us on violence and morality rant in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering why the co-author of Pitt's "best-selling book," hasn't lectured us on morality yet, is in the [brackets]:

THE WRATH OF FOOLS: An Open Letter To the Far Right

[Stand by for a morality lecture from the Hero of the Newton schoolyard.]

To: Palin-lovers, Fox "News," the "mainstream" media, and the Far Right, et al.

From: William Rivers Pitt

Date: Monday 10 January 2011

Re: The blood on your hands

[You ******* piece of shit
From: WilliamPitt
Date: May-09-10 03:34 PM
Just to make sure you see this before it gets deleted, here you go: ]

Dear “Patriots,”

At the time of this writing, Rep. Giffords is lying in a hospital bed in critical condition. The God you Bible-spewing frauds love to flog the rest of us with must have been in that supermarket crowd with her on Saturday, with His hand on her shoulder, because it is nothing short of a full-fledged miracle she survived at all. Doctors are actually cautiously optimistic that she will survive, though the degree to which she will ultimately recover is still sorely in doubt. She can respond to simple commands, according to her doctors, and is marginally able to communicate. If she survives her wound, it is wretchedly certain her life will never, ever be the same.

I just thought you should know a few things about the people you helped into their graves and hospital beds this weekend.

Yes, you.

You false patriots who bring assault rifles to political rallies, you hack politicians and media personalities who lied through your stinking teeth about "death panels" and "Obama is coming for your guns" and "He isn't a citizen" and "He's a secret Muslim" and "Sharia Law is coming to America," you who spread this bastard gospel and you who swallowed it whole, I am talking to you, because this was your doing just as surely as it was the doing of the deranged damned soul who pulled the trigger. The poison you injected into our culture is deeply culpable for this carnage.

You who worship Jesus at the top of your lungs (in defiance of Christ's own teachings on the matter of worship, by the way) helped put several churchgoers into their graves and into the hospital. You who shriek about the sanctity of marriage helped cut down a man who was about to be married. You who crow with ceaseless abandon about military service and the nobility of our fighting forces helped to critically wound the wife of a Naval aviator who fought for you in a war. You who hold September 11 as your sword and shield helped put a little girl born on that day into the ground.

You helped. Yes, damn you, you helped.

["Explain how you have the time and money to post to DU from your ******* car, you poor ******* victim."]

The "mainstream" media is already working overtime playing up the "Disturbed loner" angle with all their might. There is no doubt, from the available evidence, of Mr. Loughner's transformation into a disturbed individual. But here's the funny part: all the crazy crap he spewed, about the gold standard (a favorite of Glenn Beck, the master of Fox "News" he can sell his gold scam to suckers) and government mind control and everything else before going on his rampage, is straight out of the Right-Wing Insanity Handbook. His personal YouTube ramblings were a mishmash of right-wing anti-government nonsense...the kind that attracts sick minds like Loughner, the kind that only reinforces their paranoia, the kind that finally pushes them over the brink and into the frenzy of violence that took place on Saturday. The kind that the likes of you have been happily spreading by the day.

["Leave my mother out of your comments, or meet me in the street, you ****."]

He did not act alone. You were right there with him. You helped.

["Yes, I ******* said it. Let the mods delete this. I ******* hope you read it first, you piece of shit."]

I'm talking to you, "mainstream" media people, who created this atmosphere of desperate rage and total paranoia out of whole cloth because of your unstoppable adoration for spectacle, and ratings, and because the companies that own your sorry asses agree with the deranged cretins you helped make so famous and powerful. It was sickeningly amusing on Sunday to watch Wolf Blitzer bluster and bluff on CNN about how the media owns no responsibility for this disaster. It was like watching a ten-year-old try to explain how a lamp got broken while he was running through the living room, but no, it wasn't him. It was, in reality, a pathetic display...but that is what you generally get whenever Wolf is on your screen.

["**** you. I'll PM you my address. Say that shit to my face. I swear to God, any time, anywhere."]

"Mainstream" news personalities like David Gergen and John King bent over backwards warning people not to blame Sarah Palin and her ilk for this calamity. It was a sick man who did this, they said. Bollocks to that. I hate to break this to the "mainstream" media know-betters, but words matter. When people like Palin spray the airwaves with calls to violence and incantations of imminent doom, people like Loughner are listening, and prepared to act. The "mainstream" media lets it fly without any questions or rebuttal, because it's good for ratings, and here we are. Words matter. Play Russian Roulette long enough, and someone inevitably winds up dead.

["Any chance you're anything other than a chickenshit ****?"]

Remember the run-up to the Iraq invasion, and the subsequent occupation? "WMD everywhere, al Qaeda connections to 9/11, plastic sheeting and duct tape because we're all gonna die!" was the central theme of the majority of your broadcast schedule for years...until it was all proven to be a lie. You helped the liars, you were the liars, but you knew that. You also got your spectacle, and the corporations that own you got paid a king's ransom, so everyone was happy, except the dead.

["I promise I will drop you if we ever meet."]

Tell me this is any different, I dare you. For the spectacle, the ratings and the pleasure of your owners, you ran names like "Sarah Palin" across the sky in lights, even after she should have faded into well-deserved obscurity, and helped this blister of right-wing rage fester until it finally burst. This was your show, and in perhaps the most wretched irony of all, I would bet all my worldly possessions that your ratings are through the roof right now. You got what you wanted. I hope you are pleased.

["I ******* promise."]

And yes, I'm talking to you, Sarah Palin, you unutterably disgusting fraud. You pulled it off your ridiculous website, but it's out there: you put cross-hairs - literally, cross-hairs - on Rep. Giffords, you blithered about "reloading" instead of "retreating," and you made this country more stupid and violent with every breath you took. Well, congratulations, you failure, you quitter, you inciter of mobs. You put the cross-hairs on her, and someone finally pulled the trigger. Run from it all you like, Lady MacBeth, but this blood will never be washed from your hands.

[Fraud? Was Sarah Palin the one who perpetrated the Karl Rove Indictment FRAUD?]

I'm talking to you, Sharron Angle, you walking punch-line, who talked about "Second Amendment remedies" being necessary if you didn't get your way on health care reform during your failed Senate campaign.

["If you dare, say that shit to my face. I am not hard to find."]

I'm talking to you, Rush Limbaugh, and Sean Hannity, and Bill O'Reilly, and Michael Savage, and Ann Coulter, and Laura Ingraham, and to every other right-wing tripe-spewing blowhard blogger and Fox News broadcaster. I hope you are proud of yourselves, because this is the day you get to reap what you have been relentlessly sowing since you were forced to encompass the unmitigated outrage of a Black man winning the office of President of the United States.

["You suck. And I will wipe you out if I ever get the chance."]

That's right, I said it. Anyone who thinks good old-fashioned American bigotry and racism are not the core motivation for a vast majority of these so-called "revolutionaries" should get their heads examined. You've heard of the "elephant in the middle of the room?" Well, this is the burning cross in the middle of the room, and no amount of spin will douse those flames.

[Pitt has had an elephant in the middle of the room ever since May 12, 2006.]

I'm talking to you, Koch Brothers. Your money to create and spread this disease was well-spent; you now have one less Democrat in the House to worry about, at least for the foreseeable future. Congratulations, you un-American sacks of filth.

[Hmmm...Have you ever tried talking to your very own TruthOut colleague, the violently unstable Jason Leopold about the journalistic FRAUD you both perpetrated simply as an easy means to fame?]

And I'm talking to each and every one of you who listened to these traitors and believed the nonsense they spewed at you for no other reason than to pick your pockets for campaign/organization contributions. I'm talking to you who wore your silly fatigues and carried your badly-spelled fact-deprived signs to protests with pistols on your hips and rifles on your shoulders. You who threw bricks through the windows of politicians you disagreed with. You who shot out the windows of Rep. Giffords' office not even a year ago.

[The Magic Man who was so unstable that he threatened VIOLENCE on a homeless woman continues on and on and on with his morality lecture.]

You worked very hard to create exactly this atmosphere in America, and now it has come to be. We have entered the age of the Wrath of Fools, and we now must again exist in an America where the word "assassination" has become all too relevant.

["Wrath of Fools" from the FOOL who was so clueless that he thought he could FOOL the world with a complete journalistic HOAX.]

You helped this happen. You.

[You? You PLAGIARIST. You? You FRAUDSTER. You? You THREATENER of VIOLENCE upon a homeless woman.]

You know it. I know it. Have the guts to admit it, even if only to yourselves.

[Speaking of admitting it, almost five years have gone buy and you have yet to ADMIT that you perpetrated a journalistic FRAUD.]

This is not the end of the story, but is just the beginning. The good people of the United States of America, the true patriots, have finally seen you with your media-painted masks ripped off. They have seen what comes to pass when hate, venom, ignorance and violence goes unchecked and unanswered. You have been exposed, and the fact that it took such an unimaginably horrific act for that exposure to take place only increases the fierceness with which you will be answered. You will be repudiated, not with violence, but with the scorn and rejection you so richly deserve. Spin it as you will, scramble all you like. You are found out, and you have nowhere to hide.

[Where did you hide when you went into seclusion following the exposure of your FRAUD in 2006?]

I could go on, and on, and on, and on, but you get the gist.

[Yeah, we get the gist, Will. You feel free to perpetrate fraud, threaten violence, and possibly some sick Temporary SockPuppet immorality but you continue to wear a gigantic chip on your shoulder and lecture the rest of us on things that you are GUILTY of bigtime. ...And now his fellow DUmmies cheer on the supreme hypocrite...]

You are the best. I am in awe. And in tears..

[We know that is NOT you homeless DUmmie bobolink.]

kudos. I hope this is read far and wide.

[Oh, it will be...especially at the DUmmie FUnnies.]

it's like giving someone the ammunition and then saying you didn't pull the trigger.

[it's like giving Pitt a temporary sockpuppet and then saying you didn't go into the schoolyard.]

Bravo. Should be sent to every media outlet

["Hi. I am William Rivers Pitt, the man who fooled you with my phony Karl Rove indictment scoop back in 2006. I was wondering if you would be so foolish as to swallow my utter BS again. Thank you."]

Thanks for putting it all together in one beautifully written article.

[That will be held up as a supreme example of what an utter fraud WILLIAM RIVERS PITT is.]

I wish I was a wealthy man, so that I might have the privilege of flying to Boston tonight ...

[I'm sure Will would be happy to dip into his Trust Fund to send you money to travel to Boston to worship his hypocrisy.]

You said it very eloquently sir. I hope this gets out far and wide, although it's certain the msm will ignore it entirely.

[The MSM might not be too happy to be reminded about the fraudster who suckered them with the Karl Rove Indictment "scoop."]

UPDATE: More details on the astounding extent of Pitt's hypocrisy at NewsBusters.