Monday, February 27, 2012

KOmmie Mental Meltdown In Republican Rage Rant

Remember that hypocritical RANT by WILLIAM RIVERS PITT last year about conservatives supposedly engaged in hate rhetoric in the wake of the Gabby Giffords shooting? It has the height of hypocrisy not only because it was completely wrong but because it turned out that Pitt himself had been banned for threatening extreme violence upon a homeless woman, Bobo the Hobo. Well, take a look at this sanity-challenged KOmmie THREAD with the krazed title of "Murdering, Lying, Thieving, Rat-F*** Republican Pieces of Sub-Amphibian Sh**..." And believe me, as you shall see, the rabid frothing of the text is definitely in keeping with the hate-filled title.

However, before we go further, and since I mentioned WILLIAM RIVERS PITT, I have a special treat for you in the form of a MENDACITY ALERT. Here is a QUOTE by Pitt in which he proudly boasts of his descent from William Pitt the Elder who, along with his son, was a British Prime Minister:

"I am a direct descendant of Pitt the Elder on my father's side. His father, my grandfather, became a genealogist after he retired from medicine, and traced our family all the way back to the 1600s."

Well, I checked WIKIPEDIA and double checked it against other sources and there are NO direct descendants of William Pitt the Elder named Pitt. William Pitt the Elder had three sons. Son William Pitt the Younger, also a Prime Minister, never married and had no children. Son John Pitt did marry but had no children. Finally, a third son, James Charles Pitt, died at the age of 19 or 20 and had NO CHILDREN. I even checked on the two daughters of William Pitt the Elder on the off-chance that they had sons to whom they gave the Pitt name. Nope. The daughters all had daughters...none with the Pitt last name. Therefore, in recognition of the extreme mendacity of WILLIAM RIVERS PITT, including his "scoop" about Karl Rove being indicted on May 12, 2006, I am recommending that Pitt be appointed to the position of Press Secretary for the Elizabeth Warren campaign in MA. Oh, and Warren can get a really good recommendation on Pitt's loyalty from his previous employer, Dennis Kucinich. Hee! Hee!

And now we plunge down to the depths of insanity and watch the KOmmies howl at the moon in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, who claims to be a direct descendant of Roderick the Ridiculous who was the court jester for Charlemagne, is in the [brackets]:

Murdering, Lying, Thieving, Rat-F*** Republican Pieces of Sub-Amphibian Sh**...

[Ranted KOmmie Troubadour from the confines of his Rubber Room.]

...mendacious, death-loving, frothing, lamprey-mouthed, inhuman, abominable, atrocious, verminous, rapacious, sadistic, bullying, invasive, grasping, psychopathic, twisted, warped, animalistic, belly-crawling, mouth-breathing, illiterate, innumerate, know-nothing, imbecilic, sheep-raping, horror movie extras masturbating into wads of money while fantasizing about war collateral damage...(inhale)...puppy-torturing, vacuous, mindless, nihilistic, evil, diseased, soulless, morally bankrupt, greedy, insecure, envious, kleptomaniac charnel-house mascots stewing in universal hatred for all life...(inhale)...toxic, ugly, bestial, humorless, loveless, compassionless, demonic human-shaped ruins forever slouching toward Bethlehem in search of some fresh nightmare to wreak on the defenseless via other people's money and heroism...(inhale)...Satanic monkey-shit-throwing, cowardly, chickenhawkish, parasitic, baby's-candy-stealing, wife-beating, minority-purging, syphilitic Confederate poltergeists with erectile dysfunction...

[Speaking of mendacious, did you know that WILLIAM RIVERS PITT is a direct descendant of William Pitt the his own mind?]

...perverse, prurient, crocodile-eyed, necrophiliac mass-producers of human misery and gleeful destroyers of truth, justice, and the American way...sepulchre-hearted human deserts walking the Earth only to look for more victims...silly, stupid, ignorant bastards proud of every good thing they've never done, every person they've never been considerate toward, every fact they've never learned and will never acknowledge, and every virtue they will never possess or even attempt to comprehend...preternaturally drunken, bleary-eyed, zombie-like, empty vessels who wander aimlessly until given instruction by their masters...unthinking, unquestioning, unfeeling diabolus ex machina mockeries of the human condition, perpetually acting out a burlesque of the basest and least interesting psychological dysfunctions...

[Obviously you're looking for a Rubber Room upgrade.]

...face-chewing, self-devouring, medieval barbarian museum dioramas and depraved Nazi homunculi preserved in formaldehyde to frighten children...sick, ominous, loathsome, Nosferatu-impersonating Gollum-acolytes feasting on the flesh of our society while complaining about its, sommelier-abusing, election-buying, yacht-aficionado hemmorhoids flying flags of convenience and berating their six-year-old Chinese employees for requesting bathroom breaks...

[Should we tie you down with the leather straps now or wait until after November's election results?]

Republicans, you vile, repulsive, scum. You're not leading this country. You're not contributing to this country. You're not even part of this country. You are the maggot-ridden rot that arises in this country's damaged flesh; you are the vultures constantly picking at us to see if we're weak enough yet to become your next meal; you create problems where none would otherwise exist, just to further weaken America and quicken your own insatiable appetites; you are garbage, and you are traitors. And you are not welcome in this country anymore.

[I'm sort of in the mood now for another of those hypocritical lectures the Left was feeding us last year on the subject of hate rhetoric. And now to the other KRazed Kommies...]

I agree with every word in this post!!

[Good news! There's room for two in KOmmie Troubadour's Rubber Room.]

Hopefully, you treated yourself to a nice glass of Pinot Noir wine after writing this post!

[Laced with the venom that he was spewing.]

I hate conservatives as much as a man can hate. They're stupid and evil; breathtakingly ignorant of the way the world works and even of their own needs and eager to impose suffering in the name of personal gain and moral judgement. They have nothing to say worth listening to: Bronze Age superstitions and naked narcissism and greed wrapped up together in pure cynicism. Everything that they want is objectively bad for the country and the world. Conservatism and liberalism/progressivism are mutually exclusive worldviews and value systems; I don't believe in compromising with them because I don't see how we can do that and continue to be liberals. I certainly don't believe that there is any room for conservatives in the liberal utopia.

[Ship them off the the re-education camps!]

Democrats do not employ this rhetoric. Liberals do not employ this rhetoric. Progressives do not employ this rhetoric. Decent people of any stripe do not employ this rhetoric.

[But Troubadour and his fellow KOmmies DO employ this rhetoric. Can't you read?]

This is a rant. It's clever and funny and I would like to say it's over the top, but actually a lot of it is pretty accurate. But it's not a call to action; it's a rant.

[Really? After this rant by KOmmie Troubadour, I would definitely force him to pass through multiple metal detectors should he ever get near any of the Republican candidates. Oh, and a full anal cavity search by Ben Burch would be advisable too.]

to the schoolmarms who thought this little ditty was JUST AWFUL: would you feel the same way while being shepherded into one of the koch bros. "political re-education" camps that you just know are on the drawing board someplace? let's talk when the "liberals" are being hunted from helicopters (JUST AWFUL!)

[You will be hunted from helicopter drones which will hit you with tranquillizer darts and then set you up on stage for our comedic entertainment.]

Find any post from redstate or any other right-site that even comes close to the "hateful invective" Troubadour threw down here. Do you even read redstate? I should think not. If you did, you would know better.


Friday, February 24, 2012

Astrological DUmmies Examine Uranus

Notice how the DUmmies have started mocking religious beliefs with increasing fervor recently in response to the Catholic Church resistance to ObamaCare mandating abortion services? Well, time now to look at the belief system of many DUmmies, namely the fervent devotion to astrology (and other hocus pocus) that many of them devoutly believe in. An example is this DUmmie THREAD, with the laughable title of "Let's collect and report our Neptune/Chiron/Pisces experiences this week here." Yes, such a collection of nonsense fits right in with the DUmmie belief system. And what have you got against Uranus? Never mind. You do examine Uranus in this thread, thus my title. So let us now watch the DUmmies examine Uranus in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, who is absolutely sure that Ben Burch would love to examine Uranus, is in the [brackets]:

Let's collect and report our Neptune/Chiron/Pisces experiences this week here.

[Yes, let us continue to completely waste our time on utter nonsense.]

Especially shifts in Spiritual attitudes and incoming grace and growth in intuition:

[Your spiritual attitudes are definitely full of shift.]

Since Neptune is coming to Pisces, where is it coming FROM? Would that be Aries? Just curiosity.

[Like everything else dreamed up by the DUmmies, it is coming from Uranus.]

It is IN PISCES after having spent 15 years in Aquarius

[After which it all ends up in Uranus.]

I don't dream of my Mom often. I had issues always having to deal with her Schizophrenia episodes.Which were brought on by her chooseing not to take her meds and self medicating with street drugs. SOOOOOO dreaming of her is a rare occurance.

[Self medicating with street drugs? Is that a polite way of saying she was a crack addict?]

I havent begun to fill all those crystal healing grids I bought last August yet. But I'm going to start tuesday.

["Crystal healing grids?" Do you mean crystal meth?]

Uranus is the only planet that HITS when it is exact mathematically. Neptune is certainly much more fuzzy. BROADEN YOUR FOCUS REAL REAL WIDE and look at the world.

[Ben Burch would certainly hit Uranus.]

I have been seeing an increase in my Spiritual Consciousness. It continues to increase everyday. Of course I am building this connection with my higher self, and it continues to fortify my awareness. Hopefully I will feel even more attuned with the Cosmic Vibrations in the ensuing months and years. I suppose I need to work on the incoming influences with "grace" part of it.

[It seems to me your Cosmic Vibrations have shaken more than just one screw loose.]

I can close my eyes and transport (mind) somewhere and I have intuition. I can even touch objects and get propelled several years past. But in the new world to come; is that enough? Hinting in 4 or 5d may not cut it there.

[Your mind was certainly transported somewhere...and it never came back.]

I've been on a hamster wheel for years and years, and now want to smash that hamster cage with a mega-size sledgehammer.

[That's because you found out that you're really a gerbil looking for Uranus.]

For me, it's balanced with an impending feeling of traveling more and more in grace. I was feeling that all day yesterday. Even through the aforementioned wreck which felt very Uranus like.

[Ben Burch also felt Uranus.]

The Moon enters into Pisces and forms the New Moon on top of Neptune and Chiron

[That's what happens when you attempt to Moon Uranus.]

This is the dawning of an era the earth never seen

[This is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius
The Age of Aquarius
Aquarius! Aquarius

Harmony and understanding
Sympathy and trust abounding
No more falsehoods or derisions
Golden living dreams of visions
Mystic crystal revelation
And the mind's true liberation
Aquarius! Aquarius!

When the moon is in the Seventh House
And Jupiter aligns with Mars
Then peace will guide the planets
And love will steer the stars]

Ok, well this is weird, but since around noon, I have felt
completely STONED. And I have done nothing to warrant feeling that way, (I swear!!)

[Have you considered that your crack pipe might be the cause of your current STONED feeling?]

WTF? Is this still the same universe?

[No. You have entered the parallel universe where Algore was elected President in 2000.]

For the last two weeks I have been absolutely gripped by a 550-page book about the pre-Socratic philosophers Parmenides and Empedocles (srsly??), written by a mystical philologist named Peter Kingsley. The book is called "Reality", which turns out to be an appropriate title. I finished it today. Kingsley is a magician, sorcerer, alchemist, visionary and zen master of the first order. His interpretation of what these Greek ancients actually said (instead of what their enemies Plato and Aristotle said they said) has turned my world upside down, inside out and backwards.

[An appropriate book title for you would be "Reality Check."]

I have been living inside a 550-page koan for two weeks, forced to draw the founding paradox of reality (Is/Is Not) into my soul and hold both sides equally until my understanding collapsed under its own weight. Now I feel like I'm floating over the Abyss, except the void is both me and the universe I have created - everything and nothing. And it has a flavour like the world's best ice cream - the taste of pure Being.

[Silly me. And all this time I thought the taste of the world's best ice cream was mango ice cream covered with Kahlua.]

I think Neptune may be in there somewhere...

[Also Uranus.]

Both this experience and the money-related one I described before have to do with healing the psychic wounds that I acquired from running headlong into the brick walls of both external and internal reality.

[Yeah, reality does tend to be quite hard on the DUmmie psyche.]

If you're unsure, start like I did with his latest book "A Story Waiting to Pierce You". It's about how Mongolian shamanism influenced the same ancient Greeks, and gave Western civilization an early non-dualist foundation.

[I hate to see you run into yet another of those nasty brick walls of reality but Mongolian shamanism came about 1700 years AFTER the ancient Greeks.]

With that SUPER ACTIVE Uranus of yours on your Moon and ascendant, you must become very aware of the Uranian nature TO FIX EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW! paint the house, fix your past, breathe away all diseases, cure all addictions in one night. Really, I have a very over active Uranus as you can tell.

[Ben Burch must be drooling over all this talk about a SUPER ACTIVE and over active Uranus.]

Friday, February 17, 2012

Teenage DUmmie Redstate Bluegirl sez: "This is...FUN!"

The DUmmies are always eager to replenish their ranks with young skulls full of mush, and it looks like they have found one in the person of teenage DUmmie Redstate Bluegirl. DUmmie Redstate Bluegirl is 15 years old, and she recently joined the denizens of the DUmp. In just one week and 128 posts, Redstate Bluegirl has become thoroughly ADDICTED. The Bluegirl has been HOOKED! So ecstatic is she about being part of the Reality-Based Community®, she whoops and hollers, cheerily exclaiming, in this THREAD, "This is...FUN!"

DUmmie Redstate Bluegirl probably thinks dermabrasion for her zits is fun, too. Most girls her age enjoy hanging out at the mall and texting their friends. This one likes to hang out with grayhaired ponytailed leftover hippies, Wiccan lesbian priestesses, and 40-year-old insurgents. Go figure.

So let us prepare for a dose of youthful but misguided enthusiasm, in Redstate Bluegirl Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent Charles Henrickson, whose 16-year-old daughter keeps him current on the world of teenage girldom, is in the [brackets]:

This is...FUN!

[WHEEEEEE!!! Hanging out with middle-aged socialists! So sick! Luvin' it!!]

I've been here ONE WEEK and already have 127 (now 128!) posts.

[Piker. Most girls can do 127 TEXTS per HOUR.]



It's addictive!

[It's so sweet I've got, like, DUmmieland Diabetes!]

In 7 days it's become my #1 hobby!

[Stamp collecting is so 2011.]

(I say "hobby" because I'm 15 I can't vote yet but this place is FIRING ME UP!!!)

[Fifteen candles . . . all EN FUEGO!]

Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you THANK YOU ALL!!!!!

[We so excited!!]

[Veterans of the DUmp now welcome the n00bette . . .]

Glad to see the young folks getting involved. . . . But don't forget to do your homework.

[Be sure to get with your team members and complete that oral history assignment for LBGT Studies.]

[Redstate Bluegirl replies . . .]

Taking a break from my homework to thank you personally, 'sister! I have read several posts of yours, and you are clearly IMHO a person who thinks--and thinks deeply--before posting.

[A rare thing in the DUmp.]

Your arguments (even the rare ones I disagree with) are always intelligently presented. I hope you don't feel intellectually raped, but I've already identified you as my mentor!

[Redstate Bluegirl wants to intellectually rape her mentor, DUmmie babylonsister. DUmmie babylonsister responds . . .]

Where the heck did you get the expression 'intelluctually raped'? . . . please don't consider the word 'rape' as a good descriptor.

[But it's not "rape-rape."]

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you in any way, shape or form. I consider you to be ubercool!

[DUmmieland, DUmmieland, uber alles!]

Oh, man-! Does this mean I can't %@#&-in' curse on your threads?

[Young ears may not be ready for DUmmiespeak.]

What the f*** are you talking about??? Profane me! Oh yeah baby, profane me HARD!

[Not to worry! Redstate Bluegirl is already cussin' up a Bluegirl streak!]

You sure don't write like any teenager I know. . . .

[Mmmm, you're right. She hasn't even used one "like" yet. . . . I wonder. . . .]

I know teenagers
Teenagers are friends of mine
Bluegirl, you ___________

[Bluegirl, you are . . . REALLY A 45-YEAR OLD LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

This is failry disturbing. It's completely inappropriate to engage adults in this manner when you are a child.

[But not if you're a . . .]

Welcome to DU!

["Redstate Bluegirl" responds with a simple *, which "she" does on several dozen posts here in this thread, which is a quick way to drive up one's post count. She quickly goes from 128 to 192 posts in this way. We moles have our methods.]

Great for you to join us. My son is 16. . . .

[DUmmie stevenumbers cannot get a date for himself, but he's at least trying to set something up for his son. Wait till the son finds out that "Redstate Bluegirl" is really a Freeperville Trollguy.]

You go girl!!

[Or whatever.]



Take up volleyball or something. This place is a pit.

[DUmmie alcibiades_mystery, you win today's Kewpie Doll for this bit of sage wisdom! Congratulations!]

I love your name - quite clever.

[DUmmie rurallib likes the name "Redstate Bluegirl." Redstate Bluegirl replies . . .]

Hey, Born in Missouri, now in Texas. What's a poor Lutheran girl to do???

["LUTHERAN" girl?? Whoops! I just gave away my secret mole identity! Yes, I confess, **I**, Charles Henrickson, a Lutheran--I am "Redstate Bluegirl"! Oh well, it was FUn while it lasted!]

Welcome to DU. Glad you're having fun.

[Wait! A welcome from Head DUmmie Skinner himself! He must not have caught on! Ha ha! That Skinner! He so DUmb! Let's see if I can keep him going . . .]

Thank you Sir. I already know you're the Big Cheese here. (This will not prevent me from disagreeing with you when I, in fact, DISAGREE with you!)

[That's it! Just the right mix of deference and defiance! He's sure to buy it! Hee! Hee!]

How did you find us, Redstate Blugirl?

[Oh oh, tough question from someone in the crowd. Better come up with an answer, quick. Um, um . . .]

My Dad. He was a staunch Republican until the 2000 election was very obviously stolen. He's been a Dem ever since, and he & I & mom will be canvassing for Obama come the fall.

[Whew! That was close! They're still not on to me.]

Welcome to DU and you should be grounded for chatting with strange men on the internet.

[I **AM** a strange man, you DUmmie! If you only knew!]

Age aside, I remember feeling the same way for my first 128 posts!

[Post #129, though--what a bummer!]

This is a good place. Pull up a chair, kick off your shoes, and stay awhile.

[Thanx! I think I will. Ha, you guys still think I'm a 15-year-old Democrat girl! Meanwhile, I will start work on my autobiography: "I WAS A TEENAGE DUMMIE."]

you are adorable, redstate bluegirl.

[Aww, that's so sweet of you!]

stay, relax, post.

[I be chillaxin'. It's all good.]

hugs to you, honey.

[Kisses! TTFN!]

Sunday, February 12, 2012

"President Obama, a DU member?"

What does Barry do when he's not out golfing? We now find out: He's hanging out on DU! Hey, it could happen. Just see this THREAD, "President Obama, a DU member?"

So let us now do as Dear Reader does, which is go to DUmmieland, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, is in the [Barackets]:

President Obama, a DU member?

[He'd fit right in!]

According to James Fallows in The Atlantic Magazine: "Obama is more likely to be spending time with papers or a book, or even to be online—prowling through the same blogs and news sites as the rest of us"

[Prowling online like the rest of us. Praise Algore!]

So do you think he wanders around here reading all our little snippets and snappets?

[To be sure. He gets historical perspective from Nadin Brzezinski and profound speechifying from William Rivers Pitt.]

President Obama, do you?

[President Obama, DU!]

So this is who keeps alerting on Trumad.


You caught me. . . . You all didn't really buy that dentist crap did you?

[In his secret identisty, Obama had been speaking tooth to power.]

Yeah, but he spends all his time in the Lounge.

[Posting there under "MiddleFingerBam."]

I DO know he has his staff monitoring message boards. . . .


DU would be a great resource because I've seen him implement several of my suggestions.

[Although he did change "Pot Summit" to "Beer Summit."]

Mr. President, I need a damned job! If you're cribbing my sheet, man, you've got hire me as a contractor or something.

[Get in line. Will the Shill Pitt is ahead of you.]

He'd never get anything else accomplished.

[Clue: He isn't getting anything accomplished anyway.]

Michelle would keep asking if he was going to spend all his time on the computer. That, and is that all he cared about.

[Let's see . . . spending time on DU, or spending time with Michelle. . . . Tough choice. But if it gets him out of having to listen to Michelle, I'm guessing he's on DU.]

wouldnt that be something if Obama all this time had been an undercover Duer!

[What if, though, he's a . . . LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

Maybe he defends himself vigorously and is known as a hard core Obama supporter.

[He probably says that it's those nasty Repukes that are forcing him to the center.]

As long as he doesn't post his position on gay marriage, which would result in him being banned.

[benburch likes to post his positions.]

If Skinner is true to his word then President Obama would be immediately tombstoned.

[Ban Bam.]

if the President registered here with an anonymous username and posted something besides LOL or KNR, his "voice" as it were . . . would be spotted.

[The "ums" would give him away.]

I know he is, because he sends me private DU e-mail all the time. He asks my advice on serious national and international issues.

[Great advice on that "Fast and Furious" plan, by the way. Supply weapons to Mexican drug cartels, to use against our border patrol. Brilliant! Holder signed off on that, pronto!]

Oh, wait. I was just imagining all of that. Never mind.

[No, even a DUmmie could not be that dumb.]

He's perfectly welcome to visit the Socialist Progressives Group anytime.

[Obama's got it bookmarxed.]

The gig is up CaliforniaPeggy! I know you are Obama!

["My dear fellow Americans. . . ."]

Maybe he hangs out in the DU2: GD Presidency section. . . .

[DU2: The Land That Time Forgot.]

Hi, Mr. President!

[OK, DUFU readers, let's try to guess Obama's DU screen name. What is it? "Will 'em Rivers of Debt"? "Nadir Buttinski"? "kaput"? "Skinnier"? "MinimalMan"? "B.O. the Hobo"? Let's hear your ideas!]

DUmmies Complain About Grocery Prices

Let me begin this DUFU edition with a blatant self-plug but, as I shall demonstrate, it actually does have to do with the DUFUs. First the blatant plug: My FIRST Kindle article, HOW TO EARN MONEY AT NASCAR RACES, is now available online. It is about how NASCAR fans can earn money while scoring cheap tickets at the NASCAR races. Based on my experiences of following the NASCAR circuit for two full seasons and parts of several more. As I mentioned in the article, I tested out one of the techniques provided in the article just a few weeks ago and it worked beautifully so the information is not outdated.

So how does this shameless bit of self-promotion for my Kindle ARTICLE relate to the DUmmie FUnnies? In two ways. First of all, this DUmmie THREAD, "Wait until you go to the grocery store this week,. I thought I'd faint" demonstrates that they are mostly CLUELESS about how to use coupons to drastically reduce their costs. So guess what my very next Kindle article in the next few weeks will be about? How I use coupons to score FREE/cheap groceries including how I got my Compaq Presario Laptop computer (which I'm typing on now) FREE with coupons. Yes, I will finally reveal my innermost couponing secrets. It will be like Superman revealing to the world that his secret identity is Clark Kent. Also this article will relieve the pressure on DUFU co-conspirator, Charles since I told him the secret of how I scored the FREE computer a couple of years ago and swore him to secrecy. In just a few weeks, after I reveal all in my Kindle article, he will no longer have to carry the awesome burden of carrying that secret around.

Finally my shameless self-plug relates to the DUFUs since after writing a series of Kindle of articles, I am planning on writing a voluminous Kindle book featuring the best of the DUmmie FUnnies with lots of added bonus features with the aforementioned Charles who, relieved of his terrible psychological burden of carrying my computer couponing secret after all these years, will be psychologically fit to co-author the Kindle book with me. I am figuring the book will be at least a thousand, maybe even two thousand, pages long. Hey, there is a lot of DUmmie gold that needs to be highlighted from the best of eight years of the DUFUs. And don't worry, Wee Willie, there will be a SPECIAL chapter of the book devoted to you. Hee! Hee!

Oh, and Mary Matalin...YOU'RE FIRED!!! Hard copy books in the Age of Kindle are no longer needed. As a matter of fact, hard copy books are a hindrance since it would be impossible to publish a book with the voluminous material planned for the DUFU book. I also see such a book as chock full of graphics and links to videos, etc. so it should be very entertaining.

So now that I am done with my seemingly endless self-justification for my Kindle plug (btw, you don't need a Kindle reader to read the material since Kindle software downloads are available free for your computer or other device) let us watch the DUmmies whine helplessly over rising grocery prices in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, never one to miss an opportunity for plugging, is in the [brackets]:

Wait until you go to the grocery store this week,. I thought I'd faint.

[Please don't faint on my coupon pile that allows me to buy the same stuff for FREE or for pennies on the dollar.]

This days shopping experience was the worst yet. I shop circulars and have 3 stores nearby from which I can buy sale items.

[And has it ever occurred to your tiny mine to COMBINE sale items with coupons?]

Today was the worst experience I have had yet. Prices have taken a huge jump since I last shopped. I chatted with many other shoppers and we were all upset. I am alone and buy for myself. My first thought was to wonder how a family with children can hope to put a weeks worth of food on the table.

[Simple. That family simply reads my next Kindle article on how to score all their food items FREE or unbelievably cheap. Oh, and I will also reveal how I got FREE gasoline in the same article. < /sly plug>]

I shop every 3 weeks or so, do not buy junk stuff, only things that are 'food'. I wonder if and when this ridiculous escalation of prices will slow.

[After Barack Obama with his inflationary deficits is REMOVED from office.]

I hope those who have no jobs or are on a very limited budget can find a way to cope.

[Cope and Change...Presidents.]

I live on Social Security and do not have funds to squander. For those without even this benefit, I feel for you.

[Every time you DON'T use coupons you are squandering.]

Who the heck in Washington is watching out for the 99%ers like me who have to eat in order to survive. This whole thing really stinks.

[Mark this DUmmie down for a sure vote for Obama this year despite his misery. And now on to the other clueless DUmmies...]

I think a lot has to do with weather When things were so bad last year, they told us to be prepared for rising prices.

[Warmest winter in years so I think that lame excuse is out the window. Why don't you look at the obvious inflationary cause sitting in the White House?]

I heard on the news that gas will go up here to over $4.00 gallon this summer. That will make everything else go up.

[Did I mention that my next Kindle article will reveal how I scored FREE gasoline for most of the month of this past October?]

Fruits and vegetables? Canned goods? Meats? Milk products? I did not notice anything in LA yet.

[LA? Do they still do double coupons there? That was the first place where I did coupons. One store even TRIPLED coupons a couple of times per year.]

The best I can do is shop carefully. I also make a list of things I need that are available at Dollar Tree. I go there every month or so.

[Dollar Tree? And did you ever consider the Dollar General store because twice a month they have store coupons that knock $5 off a purchase of $25 or more. That is how I scored FREE Airwick Kits with refills this year. Just yesterday I scored a FREE 33 oz can of coffee via the same method. Oh, and the other $25 worth of stuff? I also got that FREE via coupons so all free, free, FREE!!! Details will be provided in my upcoming Kindle article. < /sly plug>]

I do find their prices on things like rubbish and freezer bags to be much cheaper. Condiments, toothbrushes, some shampoo, household cleaners, Sun non-chlorine bleach(great stuff, BTW).

[A buck each. Big deal. I haven't paid a cent for toothpaste, condoms (I mean condiments), shampoo, and household cleaners in years. Even an average couponer can easily score that stuff FREE.]

Walmart is starting to carry fresh produce and it's a ripoff, also.

[Walmart changed their coupon policies almost exactly a year ago and now it is a great place for couponers to shop. Lets see... At Walmart I scored FREE Halibut and basically ANYTHING else I wanted. More to be revealed in my upcoming article. < /sly plug>]

Yeah, it's bad enough with gas at $3.50.

[Folks, you have no idea what a JOY it is to fill up your tank with FREE gasoline. I thought my overwhelming sense of joy would only be for the first time I topped off my tank but the same feeling came back whenever I repeated that back in October. FREEEEEEEE Gaaaasssss.....]

The Fed is inflating the hell out of everything


the peanut butter jumped significantly in price from one visit to the next.

[Would you like a bottle from my FREE stock? While you're at it, please take a free bottle of Ken's marinade from my stock as well.]

I couldn't believe over $7.00 for a jar of peanut butter.

[That's your cost DUmmie. My cost is exactly $0.00.]

I happen to be at publix last week. I noticed the JIF was BOGO free. I knew we didn't need any, so I was about to pass it up, then I saw the price $6.99 (I am not sure of the ounces, but it was the biggest one Publix offers). I put 4 of them in my cart.

[And I bet you didn't know Publix allows you to use a coupon on each BOGO item. Even better you can use a manufacturer's coupon AND a Publix coupon on each item. Of course, that might not still get your peanut butter price down to zero. To learn how to do that you will need to read my next Kindle article. < /sly plug>]

Prices are always outrageous here in Los Angeles.

[So that means you are too DUmb to take advantage of the double coupon policies there.]

$8 for Maxwell House pound can o'coffee? That IS 'spensive. I pay $8 for Starbucks at Target.

[I paid $0.00 for 2lb 1 oz of coffee yesterday. I'll toast your idiocy with a cup of that Java.]

If you can use coupons, that's great.

[Yeah, you need a special license to use coupons. Only the privileged one percenters are allowed to do so.]

I should do that more, but I get discouraged because I use so few items that have coupons. I'll check out that link you gave, though.

[Better yet, you should check out my upcoming Kindle article because, as I shall reveal, you don't need coupons for specific items to get the prices reduced. I got that 33 oz can of coffee yesterday with coupons but not specifically for that product.]

I also got my new jammies from Sam's.

[My jammies are also known as underwear.]

woodman`s liqueur store in janesville is huge!

[Did I mention that I have also scored FREE beer and wine via coupons?]

Fortunately, I am a vegetarian and do not have to spend money on meat.

[I'll remember that while eating my FREE Porterhouse steaks since I also do not have to spend money on meat.]

do stores still have the dented can bin? Haven't seen that for years.

[DUmmieland has a dented skull bin.]

I couldn't believe how much milk was the other day, jeez, milk for gods sake is now getting expensive! WTF?

[Thanx for the reminder. I got to remember to pick up a FREE gallon of milk today.]

I am buying fruits and veggies and sunflower seeds and skipping almost everything else.

[Is that you, Bugs Bunny?]

I live mostly off of dried beans, frozen veggies (many at Wegman's are just $1 a bag) and I cook just about everything from scratch.

[It sounds like a court sentenced you to that miserable diet as punishment for being a DUmmie.]

Sigh. I remember when I got my first apartment in 1975. My roommate and I loaded our shopping cart to overflowing and paid twenty-nine dollars and a few cents. And that lasted us most of the summer...

[I can still do the same thing only it costs me less that ten bucks.]

I went from Wisconsin to Illinois and the price for groceries jumped 50%

[And yet you still want Governor Scott Walker recalled, DUmmie.]

We have also noticed that things have shrunk in size but prices stayed the same.

[I'm so sad. Before I could get a 16 oz can for FREE but now I can only get a 12 oz can for FREE.]

Today's shopping list
3 boxes milk duds

[DUds for a DUd DUmmie.]

How long are we all going to take this quietly??

[Just long enough to vote for Obama this November without protest.]

I'm going to start speaking to the store manager when I see that something has jumped dramatically and unprecedentedly.

[You'd be better off speaking to the Meat Manager. I'll explain in the section of my next Kindle article titled, "Meat Managers Are Your Friends." < /sly plug>]

We have seen no big hike recently in Belgium, but I read in Greece produce is like 20% up.

[Greece: Socialist heaven.]

Tuesday, February 07, 2012

DUmmies Happy Obama Angered Catholics

There is a DUFU edition in the very near future that I am going to have an absolute BLAST writing. It is when Obama is forced to REVERSE his decision to force Catholic hospitals and other institutions to provide contraceptive services via ObamaCare. Perhaps this regime thought they were being "reasonable" when they gave these institutions an extra year to fall into lockstep with their mandate. I am sure they never expected this MASSIVE reaction against this by the Catholics. Right now I'm positive the Bamster is cursing out his advisers (Axelrod? Sibelius? Jarret?) for putting him in a position that any seasoned politician would know to avoid in an election year, namely do NOT piss off a major section of the electorate. Rush Limbaugh himself today stated that he thought that Obama would be forced into a humiliating RETREAT on this policy:

RUSH: Folks, let me tell you something. Don't be surprised if the regime reverses this. I've heard that they're rethinking it, that Obama might be rethinking this ban that he's put in effect on the Catholic church and the schools and so forth. And it could be true. It could be true. I mean even Muslim clerics have come out against this decision.

You can see the DUmmies enjoying their temporary gloat in this THREAD, "President Obama was going to piss off somebody...he chose the Catholic Church. Good on 'im." So enjoy it for now, DUmmies, because it won't last long. Soon Obama will CAVE to reality and then embarrassing Freudenschade will kick in. So let us now watch the DUmmies celebrate the very fleeting "victory" of Obama over the Catholics in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, already licking his chops at the prospect of the inevitable outrage of the DUmmies soon to come when Obama ultimately caves, is in the [barackets]:

President Obama was going to piss off somebody...he chose the Catholic Church. Good on 'im.

[Good on 'im for flushing his election chances, along with that piss, down the toilet.]

I was listening to a discussion on Chucky Toad's show this morning, and the point was brought up that the administration knew SOMEONE was going to be pissed off about his health care plan. They had to make a choice; piss of the Catholic Church (their spokesman whined about how oppressed the felt -- all I could think of was Monty Python, "Look, he's oppressing me!"), or upset women. Obama decided to side with the women of America instead of the tax-exempt church with so many problems of its own.

[Actually Obama is going to piss off EVERYONE including YOU, DUmmie Atman after he is forced to CAVE.]

I think he should be applauded for that decision. As a reformed Catholic, I am disgusted at their whining, their bigotry, their child molestation...just about everything about the Catholic Church. But I still like women. Women's health should NOT be a bargaining chip, and the Catholic Church should remain a church, not a political organization. If they want to get involved in politics, let them give up their tax-exempt status and play on the same field as everybody else. Otherwise, I say STFU.

[Is a Reformed Catholic the same as a KENNEDY CATHOLIC?]

politically risky however. Lets see how it pans out.

[It will pan out into a freak out by the DUmmies when the inevitable cave by Obama kicks in. Freudenschade, baby!]

It's only politically risky if they allow the debate to be framed by the Corporate Media.

["Framed." The favorite buzzword of one Lackoff.]

Obama won the Catholic vote 56-44 in the last election. Catholics are concentrated in the battleground states. If he loses the Catholic vote he will lose those states and the election.

[From your lips to Goddess Gaia's ears.]

Catholics are concentrated in Michigan, Ohio, Wisconsin, New Jersey, and Pennsylvania which will all be battleground states this election.

[This idiotic decision by the Regime will even turn Massachusetts into a battleground state.]

If NJ is a battleground state, we have lost

[Reality check! Even Rhode Island is now a battleground state. It's all part of Obama's amazing Multi-Dimensional chess strategy of pissing off as many voting blocks as possible.]

I think you are framing the issue wrong.

[It that you, Lackoff?]

I was surprised by the number of MSNBC people who would on camera self identify as being Catholic.

[You would prefer that they self-identify as Wiccan?]

No need to piss of the leaders of America's fastest growing religion. Should have bribed them off instead first.

[We already know that Bart Stupak took the bribe. A nice cushy lobbying job in exchange for stabbing Catholics in the back on ObamaCare.]

The Catholic hierarchy thrives on outrage...

[I'm going to THRIVE on DUmmie outrage when Obama caves soon.]

Funny, I was told on this website that I'd better believe that he would cave.

[And you're going to be VERY FUnnie when Obama does cave. Soon. Very soon.]

Some days on DU, it seems like people choose to believe the worst about the President, before they've even put their socks on in the morning.

[Obama cave? Naw, it couldn't possibly happen. Hee! Hee!]

Obama has signaled a willingness to compromise. I don't know how this will come out;

[I know how this will come out. A cave by Obama followed by an extremely HILARIOUS DUFU when the DUmmie heads explode.]

My loss of patience is with those who do not understand that simple reality.

[The simple reality is that this Regime unnecessarily pissed off a large voting group and now have to do a HUMILIATING U-turn which makes them look even weaker. Yes a FUn DUFU will soon be born.]

The Catholic Church and Southern Baptists must lose their tax-exempt status.

[Charles Henrickson feels deprived since you left out LCMS Lutherans.]


Wednesday, February 01, 2012

DUmmies Wonder Why Obama BUmmed Out by Obamacare

The Chinese have an ancient saying: "Be careful of what you wish for because you might get it." Well, Obama, the Democrats, and the DUmmies wished for Obamacare and now that they got it, they are bummed out over it. Any wonder that the Obama regime facilitated ObamaCare going to the Supreme Court for a ruling on its constitutionality this Spring? They are probably hoping that the high court tosses it upon the ash heap of history so they won't be burdened by having to defend it for the November election. The DUmmies have noticed that Obama barely mentioned his main piece of legislation during the State of the Union Address as you can see in this THREAD, "Why Obama’s Not Talking About His Health Care Law In This Election." OOPS! It finally dawned on The One that ObamaCare is an albatross so he is now clamming up about it. So let us watch the DUmmies taking note of Obama's recent silence on this topic in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if the White House will celebrate in secret if the USOC strikes down ObamaCare, is in the [barackets]:

Why Obama’s Not Talking About His Health Care Law In This Election.

[Because it sucks?]

In addition to the individual mandate being extremely unpopular, opinions about the entire Affordable Care Act have remained negative and been trending downward. The Kaiser Family Foundation poll found 44 percent view the law unfavorably while just 37 percent now view it favorably.

[But Joe Biden thought it was a "big f-ing deal."]

This is why during the State of the Union President Obama gave only the briefest passing mention to his signature health care law, and he didn’t even mention it by name. The State of the Union was a political speech. It is now clear that Obama so terribly mismanaged the politics of health care reform that the law is a serious net negative for the Obama campaign.

[The poisonous legislation that Dare Not Speak Its Name.]

Don’t expect the issue of health care to be brought up by choice by Democrats in the upcoming campaign.

[That means YOU, Joe Biden!]

I keep hoping they scrap the darn thing and start all over on single pay as the focus. The problem of health care accessibility and affordability is no solved by this bill, let alone the enforcment of it's most controversial provision: mandatory coverage. It was a dog from the start, as soon as single-pay was taken off the table.

[Tough luck, DUmmie Loge23. And now that dog has bitten the Democrats in the butt.]

Obama really pushed it hard in his SOTU election campaign address!

He said ..........." "

And ....... " "

[I could have sworn I heard him say......" ". However, it might have been his teleprompter that said that.]

Constantly suggesting this was anything but a rearrangement of the insurance market won't change the reality. In 10 years we'll be talking about HCR the same way we have been talking about DADT and DOMA.

[Just call ObamaCare DOA.]

I believe if anything the mandate will become even less popular once it's enacted after the 2012 elections.

[Best way to repeal it is to defeat You-Know-Who.]

He's probably smart not to talk about it until after the Supremes make their decision. If they uphold it, he can bring up all kinds of good things about it. If they toss it, he can run on what should have been done in the first place: Medicare for all.

[Will he issue an official "OOPS!" if it is tossed? Remember, most of the first half of his Administration was dedicated SOLELY to ObamaCare.]

If they think the health care "Reform" is a "negative" now, ...wait until 2014 when The Mandate kicks in, and 40 - 70 MILLION (predicted uninsured by 2014) already hard pressed Working Class Americans are forced to BUY Junk "Bronze" Insurance.

[Thank you for giving us yet another reason for voting Obama OUT.]

The smartest thing the Democrats did was to delay The Mandate until AFTER the 2012 elections, because after The Mandate kicks in, Democrats will be unelectable for a generation.

[Thank you for presenting that silver lining in ObamaCare.]

Yes, that's what is so frightening. And Democrats will have to own the misery.

[From your lips to Goddess Gaia's ears.]