Thursday, August 16, 2012

Quirkules Unchained! DUmmies abidin' with Biden!

"Come back here, Ryan! I'm not done with you yet! So you won the first four games. Best five out of nine! I dare ya! Come on, I'm just warming up!"

To a guy in a wheelchair: "Stand up, Chuck! Let 'em see ya! . . . Oh, God love ya, what am I talking about?" To a largely black audience: "They're gonna put y'all back in chains!" While in Virginia: "With you we can win North Carolina again!" While in the 21st century: "Folks, where's it written we cannot lead the world in the 20th century in making automobiles?"

Welcome to Rogaine and Biden's Gaffe-In! It's been one gaffe after another with this guy. And just in the last week, since Paul Ryan was introduced as Romney's VP choice, Hardscrabble Joe has gone into high gear. He's gone from comic relief to complete embarrassment. And this is the buffoon who will have to face the sharp-as-a-tack Ryan in a debate.

So there's been talk lately--mounting--about REPLACING Uncle Joe on the ticket. But that would present a Joe-Barry Peril: It would make Obie look like he's hitting the panic button. So the Democrats are caught between Barack and a Hardscrabble place.

Not among the DUmmies, though! No, they are ALL IN for Screwloose from Scranton! They're abidin' with Biden! In fact, they want to see . . . QUIRKULES UNCHAINED! Witness this THREAD, "Check in if you LOVE Joe Biden."

By the way, we here at DUmmie FUnnies JOIN the DUmmies in not wanting Slo-Jo thrown under the bus. Recall that back in 2007, 2008. in the Democrat primaries, Plugs Biden was our official DUmmie FUnnies ENDORSEE. We KNEW that Crazy Joe would be COMEDY GOLD!

So let us now enter the only place stranger than Joe Biden's brain, namely, the wacky confines of DUmmieland, where the comments are in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspendent, Charles Henrickson--wondering if this latest loquaciousness is the fulfillment of Slo-Jo's promise from last year Labor Day, "I am about to be let loose!"--is in the [brackets]:

Check in if you LOVE Joe Biden...

[YES! We here at DUmmie FUnnies LOVE Joe Biden! He is a GIFT! And we love what he'll do for the ticket in November!]

I used to think it was stupid when people said of a candidate, "He's the kind of guy you'd like to have a beer with" as though that was somehow an important part of governance. But just let me say that having a beer with Joe Biden is officially on my bucket list. I love the guy. And, Joe, I'm buying!

[DUmmie Jeff in Milwaukee wants to have a bucket full of beer with Uncle Joe! Hardscrabble all the way! Now, Milwaukee . . . that's in North Carolina, isn't it?]

Biden would be a great guy to know.

[If you're a psychologist.]

Just ask those people who rode the Amtrak to work with him for decades. . . . He's the working-man's real deal.

[He's the rail deal! By the way, how many working-men can afford that Wilmington-Washington train fare for decades?]

I could see him as president one day.

[OK, one day, but that's it.]

Haven't had a beer with him, but have been to a ballgame with him.

[That must have been the time when he got hit in the head with the foul ball.]

Would love to sit down and have a beer with both Obama and Biden.

[Beer Summit 2.0. Quaff . . . gaffe . . . quaff . . . gaffe . . . quaff . . .]

love Joe. he is a BFD.

[He is a Big Flubbing Deal.]

Biden is going to tear Ryan to shreds in the debate. . . .

[Pause here for gales of laughter . . . Still laughing . . . On the floor now . . . Rolling . . . My ass has come off now . . . OK, that's better. Please continue . . .]

I thought he was HOT back in the early 1970s. Now I just love him for himself.

[Where's it written he cannot be hot now in the 20th century?]

I still think he's hot.

[How hot is he? He's so hot, Sandra Fluke would pay for her own contraceptives.]

Talk about eye candy!

["Yum! I could just eat him up!" --benburch]

Some of us refer to him as the "Silver Fox". That is one good looking man!

[It's the hair plugs, I think. They look so natural.]

Have loved him since he ran for President the first time.

[Back in, what, the 1870s?]

Checking in! Love Joe! Always have. Always will! K&R!!!!!

[Checking in! Love Joe! R&R!!!!!]

What's not to love about a fundamentally honest and generous person?

[Mr. Generosity there gave a whopping 1.5% of his income in charitable donations last year. But that's up from the 0.3% he gave in 2007.]

If both Joe and Hilary decide to run in the 2016 primaries, I shall be sorely taxed to choose between them.

[If either Joe or Hillary wins in 2016, one thing's for certain: You shall be sorely taxed.]

He just has a way about him. He often has what the Media calls Gaffe when he says what he thinks. That makes him relatable.

[Joe has the gift of gaffe.]

Don't ever let them shut you up, Joe!


Talking about shackles... debt is a shackle, it really is. Everyone needs financial freedom.


Joe is our secret weapon.

[He's a Human Gaffling Gun!]

he is pretty much Superman as well.

[I think of him more as Mighty Mouth.]

I'm chained to Joe Biden and Barack Obama! and lovin' every minute of it!

[Calm down, ben!]

I hate to break it to you all but, I don't think that Joe drinks beer or any other alcoholic beverages.

[Joe doesn't NEED the silly sauce! He's just that way on his own!]

Fine. I'll buy him a beer and then drink it myself.

[Is that you, Will Pitt?]

Amtrak Joe

[I'm going off the rails on a crazy train. I'm going off the rails on a crazy train. Let's go!]

he's gold.

[He's COMEDY gold!]

I want to have a water fight with him.

[That will be AFTER the mud wrestling, ben.]

Joe "The Hammer" Biden. . . .


Anonymous krazy kat said...

"Joe is our secret weapon."

Kamikaze Joe.

"Don't ever let them shut you up, Joe!"

Right on! Speak truth to White House power!

"Talk sbout eye candy!"

Pants troglaman's inner homo.

5:10 PM  
Anonymous Liptonius said...

Ok. This I do NOT understand.

Way back before he was picked to make Obama look smart, particularly when he was on the committee denigrating, er, I mean 'vetting' supreme court nominees, he was a bloviating, pompous, knucklehead.

Mean-spirited, smarmy and graceless, he blathered as no politician had ever blathered before. Even his peers were red-faced, some, from embarrassment, and some from repeated facepalms.

Not generous, not smart, and where his vaunted "foreign policy genius" is supposed to come from is a mystery.

Slow Joe is just a disaster.

5:20 PM  
Blogger 98ZJUSMC said...

his vaunted "foreign policy genius" is supposed to come from is a mystery

I never understood that one. The clown is an utter fool.

6:40 PM  
Blogger 98ZJUSMC said...

Talk sbout eye candy!"

Heh.....oh boy. I guess that means there's a wretched, (D)Ullard crone in everyone's life, huh?

6:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please alltogether now, unleash Joe, unleash Joe, unleash Joe!!

7:19 PM  
Anonymous The JUDGE said...

Liptonius said...

".... where his vaunted "foreign policy genius" is supposed to come from is a mystery."

Probably the same place Troglatwit, the worthless son of a worthless fucking bastard, gets his self-proclaimed genuis...he pulls it out of his ass.

9:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

He's on their side; that's the only reason they need to 'love' him.

9:44 PM  
Anonymous Corona said...

"Biden is going to tear Ryan to shreds in the debate..."

We all know that debate will get higher ratings than any Super Bowl for one reason only. Mark your calenders.

To be fair, I remember Biden from the 80s. At best he was a "used car salesman" type of Democrat who pulled crap out of his ass like CA Gov. Moonbeam in LA. Thing is, it's 30+ years later and they're both going senile. I don't believe either one of them is aware of the Marxist subversion that has taken over the Democrat party the past 10 years.

10:33 PM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

It's possible that stroke Biden had several years ago may be part of the reason is such a total screwball. Senility is another reason.

And of course the fact that Biden almost makes Troglaman The Guttersnipe look like a genius doesn't help him.

3:05 AM  
Blogger Dandapani said...

I guess he fell off the wagon in this famous video:

5:08 AM  
Anonymous envisio said...

[How hot is he? He's so hot, Sandra Fluke would pay for her own contraceptives.]

I saw Obama's commercial where a lady said "contraceptive are important to women."

OK, sure they are. There is a Walgreens on just about every street corner in America. They have contraceptives. Its been a while since I have bought any but I am sure they don't cost that much.

"contraceptives are important to women"
water is important to trees
beer is important to me
assless pants are important to faggots
what? Do they want contraceptives sent out in the mail with welfare checks? Hell why not send out a bag of frozen peas too? "Peas are important to people"

8:59 AM  
Anonymous envisio said...

"""I still think he's hot.""""

Paris Hilton checks in...

9:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Seriously, these guys might be the dumbest people in the country. Biden is likely mildy retarded. He makes Palin look like a rocket scientist.

9:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I would hate for this idiot to be one tick away from ever being the President again...So I have a question. Were all the illegals that were recently made legal by OnumbNuts, also registered to vote??

10:05 AM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

Anonymous said...

"....I have a question. Were all the illegals that were recently made legal by OnumbNuts, also registered to vote??"

Not immediately, but that is the plan and what the DSA wants to be the end result.

12:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A friend of mine used to work for Algore and she told me Biden was a complete loon. Most dangerous place on Earth was between Biden and a news camera.

4:17 PM  
Blogger 98ZJUSMC said...

envisio said...
"""I still think he's hot.""""

Paris Hilton checks in...


8:37 PM  
Blogger 98ZJUSMC said...

Anonymous said...
Seriously, these guys might be the dumbest people in the country. Biden is likely mildy retarded. He makes Palin look like a rocket scientist

So does Obinga Jugears McSandtrap.

8:39 PM  
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