A FUnnie look at the loony residents of the Democratic Underground aka DUmmies in particular and the Leftwing Blogosphere in general.
Thursday, July 10, 2014
DUmmies and KOmmies Enjoy Obama Laughing At Border Crises Meeting
Call it Blind Optics. The DUmmies and KOmmies are so desperate to make Texas Governor Rick Perry look bad that they overlook the fact that Obama looks horrible in the photos above and below. These photos were taken by Reuters during the B order Crises meeting yesterday. Normally the Regime would have prohibited these pics of Obama not taking the border crises seriously but apparently they have the same narrow mindset as the DUmmies and KOmmies because they focused in on Perry looking upset and thought that was a "win" for them. Actually it is turning into a bigtime loss, only they don't realize it yet with the exception of one KOmmie who sounded a discordant note of reality which earns him a Kewpie Doll award as we shall see. The DUmmies can be seen completely misinterpreting the situation in this THREAD, Spew Alert - OBAMA/PERRY: Sometimes, Yes, A Pic Is Worth More Than A 1000 Words and the KOmmies echo their idiocy in A Picture truly is worth 1000 words. So let us now watch both the DUmmies and KOmmies reveal how divorced from reality they are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, eagerly awaiting their shock when they finally realize that the public reaction to the pics is the opposite of what they expect, is in the [barackets]:
Spew Alert - OBAMA/PERRY: Sometimes, Yes, A Pic Is Worth More Than A 1000 Words
[Soon to be followed by 1000 Excuses.]
what a contrast. Perry looks like he just dumped in his pants.
[While Obama looks like he wet his pants laughing at how FUnnie he finds the border crises.]
Our Pres. is relaxed, Perry is frozen in his outplayed grimace as he realizes he has been hoisted on his very own, very uncomfortable petard.
[How dare Perry not find the border crises a laughing matter like our beloved Obama.]
Our President has a great sense of humor!
[Border crises. Scabies. Lice. TB. HILARIOUS!!!]
Some things still make me smile. This made me smile.
[Your smile will fade fast as soon as you find out the public reaction to Obama laughing at the border crises.]
Something was FUNNY and Perry didn't think so..
[It's called BORDER CRISES.]
The captions will write themselves.
["Obama laughs about border crises as Perry looks on in disgust."]
Guy on the left nearest to the camera has a really strained expression on his face.
[Because he is also realizing what a fool Obama is making of himself by laughing about the border crises. And now we go to KOmmieland where one KOmmie actually injected a note of brutal reality...]
A Picture truly is worth 1000 words
[A picture showing Obama not taking the border crises the least bit seriously.]
two thirds of the electorate ain't laughing.
[KOmmie River Rover, for pointing out the reality of the situation, you WIN a Kewpie Doll!!!]
sad silly little reply.
[Replied a KOmmie who hates being confronted by reality.]
Are you a purity troll, or a Tea Partier?
[What is a KOmmie Tombstoning called?]
that picture is a thing of beauty all by its own self. I don't even care what caused it. I just love it.
[Will you also not care when the public reacts AGAINST Obama laughing during the border crises meeting?]
I can laugh at him, and do. I encourage you to do likewise, and as many others as care to join in. And mock him, insult him and lampoon him. Publication of a pic where it appears the President of the US is doing so does not help us at all. Quite the opposite.
[Sorry, KOmmie Catte Nappe, but only ONE Kewpie Doll awarded per DUFU edition.]
It was all probably very innocent...Rick didn't get the Knock-Knock joke...
[Knock! Knock! Who's there? Lice. Lice Who? Lice Who jumped the border and into your crotch.]
DUmmies Mock Chelsea Clinton Supposedly Not Caring About Money
Hillary's book tour campaign is failing fast. Just minutes ago I checked Amazon and her book has tumbled to #19 while "Blood Feud" has risen to #3. Yes, Hillary has made a lot of mistakes during her non-campaign campaign for president but perhaps her biggest mistake is letting daughter Chelsea open her mouth. Even the DUmmies are mocking the resident of a $10 million luxury Manhattan condo for saying she tried to care about money but couldn't. Yeah, the more Chelsea yaps the more likely that the Cherokee Princess jumps into the nomination race due to Hillary's tumbling popularity. You can see the DUmmie mockery in this THREAD, "Chelsea Clinton: I Tried to Care About Money, But Just Couldn't." So let us now watch the DUmmies mock the modern day Marie Antoinette in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if he can eat the cake crumbs from Chelsea's $3 million wedding, is in the [brackets]:
Chelsea Clinton: I Tried to Care About Money, But Just Couldn't
[Chelsea yawned from her $10 million condo. And now an excerpt from a NY Daily News article...]
Hillary Clinton insists she isn’t “well-off” and now daughter Chelsea, according to a recent interview, claims she couldn't care less about money.
The daughter of former President Bill Clinton and ex-secretary of state Hillary Clinton explained in a recent interview why she left lucrative professions and opted for working with her family’s philanthropic foundation. ‘I was curious if I could care about (money) on some fundamental level, and I couldn’t,’ she said.
I was curious if I could care about (money) on some fundamental level, and I couldn’t,” she told Fast Company in an interview that ran in the magazine's May edition, explaining why she gave up lucrative gigs to join her family’s philanthropic foundation.
“It is frustrating, because who wants to grow up and follow their parents? I’ve tried really hard to care about things that were very different from my parents … it’s a funny thing to realize I feel called to this work, both as a daughter and also as someone who believes I have contributions to make,” she continued about her reluctant status as a boomerang kid.
[And now here are the DUmmie peasants storming the Clinton Bastille...] 3mm dollar wedding, 10mm condo. Doesn't "care" about money.
[Because she won life's lottery.] Really! Its easy to "not care about money", when you have shitloads of money
[Posted a future Warren primary voter.] The Clintons appear to have internalized the culture of wealth in which they live. So that to them the word "money" means something very different from what it means to most people. They have an amount of money that most people would think of as great wealth, but because they live among even richer people, they think of themselves as just regular folks and not particularly affluent.
[The one percent consider themselves poor compared to the .001 percent.] She's got a net worth of 15 million. I think I could be a bit more blase about cash if I had 15 mill.
[Instead all you have are empty pizza boxes piled up in your living room basement.] How the hell did she "earn" 15 million Dollars? Seriously did she invent something?
[She invented a server system to back up all emails, including those of the IRS.] tone deaf daughter of a tone deaf mother. easy shit to say. Let's see you give up some of those things that the money you don't care about buys you, dearie.
[As long as it doesn't amount to big sacrifice like giving up her chauffeured limo.] And I don't care that Chelsea doesn't care about money. I care that Elizabeth Warren cares more about struggling families on Main Street than the jet setters on Wall Street.
[Do you also care that Warren lives in a multi-million dollar mansion and owns millions in CORPORATE stock? The benefits of faking your affirmative action way to success.] I grew up in privilege- considerable privilege. New Canaan Ct. The most elite private day schools and prep schools and I said that exact same thing- that I didn't care about money when I was in my early twenties. It was easy for me to say- I didn't have to work (I did). I had money to live on very comfortably. And then I realized how clueless it was to prattle on about that when I didn't have to worry about money.
[That was DUmmie cali, a regular. File that info away for later.] So far, the "Clintons-as-humble-populists" PR campaign has been comedy gold.
[And therefore very DUFUable.] Putting America to work!! Forget Hillary - Chelsea for President!
For goodness sake, stop the Chelsea bashing. Jesus Christ.
[LEAVE CHELSEA ALONE!!!] she's as tone deaf as her mommy. and she's married to someone who has his own hedge fund. Not to mention the obscene money she happily took for doing shit for NBC.
[And her father-in-law gave generously to Nigeria in response to an email request.] you did hear about the, *ahem, difficulties the Clinton Foundations have with their, *ahem, finances? That charity seems to have gone large part to schmoozing the rich. It is a scam. But you call it charity all you like.
[Hey, schmoozing the rich to ask for yet more bucks doesn't come cheap.] If she doesn't care about money why are her parents avoiding taxes to make sure she inherits more?
[Every used pair of underwear tax writeoff counts.] She sounds Presidential. When is it her turn again?
[2024.] Her public statements are carefully orchestrated by the Clinton campaign. I was stunned when she and her mother jointly announced her pregnancy, without her husband by her side!
[Their marriage is as strong as any of J-Lo's multiple marriages.] MEMO TO ENTIRE CLINTON FAMILY: SHUT THE F*CK UP ABOUT MONEY, SOONEST.
DUmmies Hop On Cherokee Princess Presidential Bandwagon
Elizabeth Warren aka Fauxcahontas IS not running for President. Got that? IS not running which means she WILL be Hillary's worse nightmare. Imagine the Hillary meltdown when once again a newcomer steals away the Democrat presidential nomination she has been lusting after for years. This time there will be no biding her time for the next opportunity. There is no time left for her which is why her impending meltdown would be enormous but highly entertaining. We can already see the trouble for Hillary since the hard core leftwing Democrats vastly favor Warren over her as you can see in the DUmmie THREAD, "New Statesman : Why Elizabeth Warren should take on Hillary Clinton and run for the US presidency." So let us now watch the DUmmies ready to cast their ballots for the Indian Princess in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, looking forward to the Alien vs Predator battle, is in the [brackets]:
New Statesman : Why Elizabeth Warren should take on Hillary Clinton and run for the US presidency
[Hillary's Depends already spilleth over.] I do really hope EW will change her mind, and try to show up onj next presidential primaries. Because, she's is JUST A REAL FIGHTER OF CORPORATION, unlike, Hillary and her husband, who had always allied with them when it suited their personal promotion and agenda.
[Does this mean that Miss Cherokee Queen will have to give up her $8 million in CORPORATE stocks?] Senator Elizabeth Warren has said more than once that she is not running.
[Correct. She IS not running. I guess you missed that part of basic grammar that covers the future tense.] warren and any democrat that can branded batshit crazy liberal will LOSE
[Your Kewpie Doll is in the mail.] Warren isn't running, and she made very clear if Hillary runs she will support her. The only way
you can vote for Elizabeth Warren is if you live in Mass.
[Naive DUmmies are cute...and FUnnie!!!] I don't think that anybody who was in favor of going to war with Iraq should be allowed to run for President. Also, anybody who is friends with Don Tyson, the chicken torturer, does not have my vote. I could go on and on......
[Don't stop. I'm still laughing about your "chicken torturer" comment.] Elizabeth Warren should take on Hillary and pound the shit out of her.
[MMA Match!!!] It would be better if she ran after Citizen's United was overturned.
[In the Year 2525 if Man is still Alive.] Around 6 months ago, Warren endorsed Clinton for 2016. Clinton would use that against her in the primaries.
Communist DUmmies Shut Down Meeting Because of Camera
Vampires can't tolerate sunlight. Likewise Communists can't tolerate cameras at their meetings because that would shed light on who they are. As you can see in this VIDEO, Communists at Portland State University can't stand it when an outsider attends their "public" meeting with a camera. What is laughable is they claim to the cop they the guy with the camera is a "disruptor" but thanks to the camera we can see who the TRUE disruptors are. And childish in the extreme. I gotta ask... How many of these COmmies are also DUmmies? There must be a bunch. Anyway, I am using this DUFU edition so you can see for yourselves just what COmmies/DUmmies are like. They HATE transparency and we can see why because the result is they are quite a bunch of jerks.
Serial Fabulist Pitt Condemns Serial Plagiarist Chris Hedges
In case you haven't heard the news, erstwhile left-wing hero Chris Hedges has been exposed as a serial plagiarizer. You can read the details at the NEW REPUBLIC and/or read about it over at NEWSBUSTERS written by someone whose name I can't quite recall. So who in this world has the LEAST standing to condemn serial plagiarist Chris Hedges? How about serial fabulist WILLIAM RIVERS PITT who allowed his mind to be conveniently massaged by another serial plagiarist, JASON LEOPOLD, into reporting that Karl Rove had already been indicted on May 12, 2006. So now we have the laughable spectacle of WILLIAM RIVERS PITT the notorious fabulist who lies with psychotic ease condemning serial plagiarist Chris Hedges as you can see in this THREAD, "Chris Hedges has been accused of serious, serial plagiarism." So let us watch serial fabulist WILLIAM RIVERS PITT condemn serial plagiarist Chris Hedges in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting the Pitt is still waiting that 24 business hours for the Blue Fairy to arrive with Karl Roves sealed indictment, is in the [brackets]: Chris Hedges has been accused of serious, serial plagiarism
[WILLIAM RIVERS PITT has been accused of serious, serial fabulism. Okay, pitt then plagiarized several paragraphs from the New Republic before coming up with this holier-than-thou observation...] Read the whole article: this could not have been unintentional plagiarism. Stick a fork in this guy. His career is over.
[Perhaps his career will revive in 24 business hours.]
I would rather jump into traffic than believe this is true...but the evidence appears to be pretty overwhelming.
As a writer, I consider plagiarism to be the one unforgiveable crime in the business. You just don't steal someone else's toil. If you can't write it yourself, find something else to do.
So this really, really, really sucks if it turns out to be true.
[It already turned out to be true that WILLIAM RIVERS PITT is a serial fabulist. He makes things up hoping for that Hail Mary Pass that will miracle himself into unearned fame. Unfortunately his one big shot completely backfired on him and he ended up a Web laughingstock. Okay, on to the other DUmmies who somehow did not think it odd that a serial fabulist would be condemning a serial plagiarist...] Don't they know they'll get caught?
[It didn't seem to bother WILLIAM RIVERS PITT.] Read the full article. There are multiple cases of Hedges doing this.
[Almost as many cases as WILLIAM RIVERS PITT making things up.]
(David Gregory enters a room furnished with bookshelves, wall paintings, wood paneling, oak desk, plush swivel chair, and a couch. On the wall is the framed medical license of Dr. Shrink. He angrily slams the door behind him. Dr. Shrink, sitting behind his desk, gets up to introduce himself.)
DR. SHRINK: Hi David! NBC News has assigned me to analyze you so that we might find a way to make your personality more appealing to “Meet The Press” viewers. So far my report indicates that you are insecure, rude, and cut off people in the middle of...”
GREGORY: Shut your mouth! I don't cut off people while they are talking! So what does NBC News have against me? I don't understand why they are forcing me to see you.
DR. SHRINK: Well, they feel that...
GREGORY: I don't give a damn what they feel! How about how I feel? They are making me look like such a jerk by advertising that I am seeing a shrink. Tell me the truth, Doc, are they going to fire me?
DR. SHRINK: Well, they did say they stand behind you so just lie there on the couch and tell me your thoughts.
GREGORY: That's what they tell everybody before they fire them. And since Meet The Press has fallen from a strong first place to a dismal third since I've been there, I think my days there are numbered.
DR. SHRINK: I can assure you that...
(David Gregory interrupts by screaming with a wide frightened look in his eyes.)
GREGORY: DO YOU SEE HIM???
DR. SHRINK: Huh?
GREGORY (pointing ahead): If thou art privy to my network fate, Oh speak!
DR. SHRINK: David, who are you talking to?
GREGORY: To him! He has haunted me ever since I replaced him. He who is irreplaceable.
DR. SHRINK: You mean...
GREGORY: The ultimate Buffalo Bills fan. I just can't get him out of my mind.
DR. SHRINK: Perhaps we should meet him head on via hypnosis.
GREGORY: Anything to keep him from haunting me.
(Dr. Shrink holds up a medallion in front of Gregory and swings it back and forth.)
DR. SHRINK: Look closely at this Walter Cronkite Journalism Award medallion.
GREGORY: Where did you get that?
DR. SHRINK: Ronan Farrow won it after being on MSNBC for about five minutes. He gave it to me as a gift since he is also getting a David Brinkley Journalism Award for living through birth and doesn't really need it.
GREGORY: It isn't working. I don't feel hypnotized.
DR. SHRINK: Concentrate on Uncle Walt's moustache. Watch it very carefully as it goes back and forth...back and forth...
(Gregory's eyes start to close.)
GREGORY: I'm sleepy... Feeling sleepier...
DR. SHRINK: Good! Now go back in time a few years until you see...
DR SHRINK: You see him?
GREGORY: Yes! Tim Russert! It is so wonderful to see him again. We are in a D.C. Restaurant and he is at a table with me.
DR. SHRINK: Ask him for some advice about...
GREGORY: WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU? HAVE YOU NO IDEA OF MY IMPORTANCE!!!!?
DR. SHRINK: Why are you yelling at him?
GREGORY: I'm not yelling at Tim. I'm shouting at the lousy lowlife waitress who completely messed up my order of foie gras. Hey! Idiot! I ordered Pacific Ocean fleur de sel for my seasoning, not Atlantic! How can you be so stupid you...
DR. SHRINK: David, don't waste your time on the waitress. You need to ask Tim for advice on how to improve your show performance.
GREGORY: I can't. Tim just grabbed me by my coat lapel and shoved my face into the spinach dip.
DR. SHRINK: But can you get some advice from him?
GREGORY: “Don't be a damn shmuck!” That's what he is yelling at me.
DR. SHRINK: What else?
GREGORY: Nothing else. Getting that spinach dip in my eyes broke the hypnotic spell and now he is gone.
DR. SHRINK: Maybe Tim was right. The horrible way you treat your staff is because you act like a shmuck.
GREGORY: No, that can't possibly be right. My staff loves me. Why my “Meet The Press” producer, Chris Donovan, who was with Tim is also sticking with me. That shows you how loyal my people are.
DR. SHRINK: Um, David. I got a text message a little while ago that Donovan quit your show. Who can blame him the way you treat your staff like dirt?
GREGORY: Don't put this on me. I've long known my staff has been undermining my authority. For example, I was planning an office party and noticed some strawberry ice cream was missing from the freezer. Now I knew there was a duplicate key to the freezer and that all I had to do to track down the culprit was to find that key. I knew that they laughed at me behind my back and mocked me but the key, ah, that's where I had them! I proved with geometric logic that a duplicate key to the freezer existed and uh....
(No sound in the room for a long time except for the clicking of metal balls in Gregory's hand.)
DR. SHRINK: David, I think our session is over.
GREGORY: But what about my job? Will I be able to stay on as host of “Meet The Press?”
DR. SHRINK: I can assure you that NBC stands behind you. You will definitely be able to keep your job when you come back after you spend a very long time to be with your family.
DUmmies Avoid the ISLAMIC Obvious In Nigerian Kidnapping
The DUmmies are discussing the kidnapping of over 200 Nigerian schoolgirls as you can see in this THREAD, "Nigerian abducted girls' families fast losing hope of rescue." However the DUmmies laughably avoid the very obvious. And the very obvious is the fact that Boko Haram ("Western Education is a Sin") is an ISLAMIC militant group. Oh, and you also won't see "Muslim" or "Allah" mentioned in the DUmmie discussion. Bottom line is that a militant ISLAMIC group kidnapped over 200 Christian girls to sell them into slavery and/or forced marriages. The DUmmies continue to act as if there is no such thing as ISLAMIC terrorists which is a complete divorce from reality. So let us now watch the DUmmies conduct a reality-free discussion about the Nigerian kidnapping in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering what happened to Nigerian e-mails, is in the [brackets]:
Nigerian abducted girls' families fast losing hope of rescue
[I saw an interview with the Nigerian president, Goodluck Jonathan (real name), and he said it was up to the USA to rescue them which means he probably wants to scam us for $$$.]
The families of more than 230 Nigerian schoolgirls abducted by Islamist insurgents more than 10 days ago say they are fast losing hope of seeing their daughters again despite government assurances they will be found.
[That promise is about as valid as "If you like your health plan you can keep it."]
The girls, who were mostly between 16 and 18 years old, were rounded up at gunpoint after militants overpowered a military guard assigned to a boarding school in Chibok, in north-eastern Borno state. They had just finished their final school exams. The school was the only one still open in the area following threats and attacks by Boko Haram, whose ideology opposes both so-called western education, and particularly women's education.
[Gee, I wonder what is the source of that ideology? The DUmmies never mention it and never would unless the kidnappers were extremest Lutherans (LCMS). Then they would be screaming about it in every other sentence.] The terrorist group's main reason for existence is to prevent girls from going to school. This is their stated aim.
[And to bring about ISLAMIC Sharia law but none there will mention it.] Unfortunately, our press will only give it real coverage if Faux Noise tries to claim a connection to Obama.
[And you won't make the connection to the obvious---ISLAMIC terrorists.] This is beyond words...I can only hope for a miracle that is unlikely to come.
[As unlikely a miracle as the DUmmies admitting that Boko Haram are ISLAMIC terrorists?] Kerry Condemns Nigerian Schoolgirl Kidnapping. John Kerry is in Africa this weekend and he has spoken about it - he is promising US help:
[Is he going to send in the Swiftboats?] I can't help wondering what Hillary would do if this had happened on her watch as SsS.
[She would have claimed that the kidnapping was caused by a YouTube video.] This story makes me so angry and I don't know of any concrete way to help. It's so frustrating.
[It's frustrating that you can't even recognize that Boko Haram are ISLAMIC terrorists.] John Kerry and Russ Feingold are travelling in Africa this weekend. These men have empathy and they have daughters.
[That settles it. Boko Haram is as good as destroyed.] From what I've read, a big part of the problem is that the Nigerian government isn't taking action. Our intel will be of limited value if the Nigerian leaders don't put it to use. But hopefully Kerry and Feingold will be able to help.
[Here they come to save the day! The Mighty Mice!] I don't know how much we can do but I am eternally optimistic that Obama and Kerry have a workable plan.
[As workable as a certain website?] The United States government has said that it supported Nigeria's fight against terrorism with over $20 million in 2012. Marie Harf, Deputy Spokesperson of the U.S. Department of State, disclosed this during Thursday's daily press briefing in Washington D.C.
[Gotta wonder how much of that ended up in the form of presidential palace furnishings.]
"As of last year, for Fiscal Year 2012, we provided over $20 million in security assistance to Nigeria," said Ms. Harf, while responding to questions from reporters. Part of what that does is help professionalize their military, investigate terrorist attacks, and enhance their forensic capabilities. And we've worked with law enforcement there as well to help build their capacity as well," she added.
[I doubt if even $20 of that ever ended up used for its proclaimed purpose.] What kind of monsters do this?
[The ISLAMIC kind but you will never admit this.] This story needs to be front and center!
[While avoiding the front and center truth of the story: ISLAMIC terrorists.] Is the U.S. doing anything to help?
[Yeah, we're sending in the Commando Team of John Kerry and Russ Feingold.]
I am a 30,000 year old reincarnated being who materializes once every 5000 years in a Las Vegas hotel suite. My greatest goal in my eternal life is to spend 6 months on a small tropical island with Mary Matalin doing nothing but pitching a DUmmie FUnnies book (with CD-ROM insert) deal with her. If you happen to be Mary Matalin, please contact me at:
email@example.com. If you are anybody else, you can contact me there too. Remember, if you are a book publisher, please feel free to embarrass me with an extravagant book advance.