Tuesday, July 24, 2012

DUmmies wonder: "Is It Time to Leave America?"


It has become a tradition in DUmmieland. From time to time, one of the disgruntled denizens of the DUmp will post a thread about how they are seriously considering fleeing Jesusland and migrating to Socialist Nirvana (e.g., Canada, France, one of the Scandinavian countries). But then they don't leave! They keep hanging around, whining about how bad 'Murrka is. It's all talk and no U-Haul.

We have such a whinefest today here in this THREAD by DUmmie Yavin4, "Is It Time to Leave America?"

So let us now gather in the lobby of the DUmmieland Useless Hostel, where the prog pilgrims are packing their backpacks and preparing to depart, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, declaring this a DUbble-DUFU Tuesday, is in the [brackets]:

Is It Time to Leave America?

[In your case, DUmmie Yavin4, yes.]

8%+ unemployment is rapidly becoming the new normal.

[Hey, it's Obamanomics. Get used to it.]

We have a Republican party dominated by hot-headed, ignorant, racists like Michelle Bachman. We have a Democratic party that is too weak to stand up for their own principles. Rule by oligarchy has been approved by the SCOTUS. And now, we have to be armed to the teeth.

[Just. Give. Up.]

Is this the kind of country that you want to raise your children in?

[You're forgetting, Yavin4, that most DUmmies don't have children. They have abortions. And homosex. And so the DUmmie dearth rate makes that a non-issue.]

Is this the kind of nation that you want to grow old in and have to pay for your health care. . . ?

[No way! Let's go to a country with rationed government health care, where we can wait three years for a hip replacement--if we qualify, if we don't get too old in the meantime and get sent to the Death Panel. . . .]

Do you want your tax dollars to pay for yet another war in Iran instead of education?

[If you're talking about FEDERAL tax dollars, then yes, I DO want those dollars to go toward a legitimate federal function like national defense and to stay clear away from a local matter like education.]

Emigrating to another nation is extremely difficult, but people do it every day when conditions in their native lands get so bad they have no choice.

[FUnnie how so many of them want to come to AMERICA! What's WRONG with them??]

We're nearing that point.

[Start packing!]

I know some of you will call me a coward and say, "stay and fight".

[No, I'll call you a DUmmie and say, "Please go!"]

Tell me, how are you going to fight an oligarchy, the religious nut cases, and the bigots who are armed to the teeth all at the same time?

[You can't. So go to Iran, for example, where you can escape all that.]

I am preparing to leave and live elsewhere.

[Bon voyage! Or are you going to be a big tease, DUmmie Yavin4, and end up staying?]

[Now let's see what your fellow travelers--who usually end up being non-travelers--have to say . . .]

My wife wants us to leave. We have an offer. I am waiting to see what happens in November. If that f*** Romney gets in, I am so out of here.

[Oh, why wait? I hear if you book travel to leave no later than November 5, you can get a big discount! So don't delay! Call today! That's 1-800-TOR-ONTO. Operators are standing by. . . .]

And go where?

[ANY place other than racist, bigoted, redneck, backwards 'Murrka!!]

To A More Civilized, Advanced Nation. Northern Europe. Canada. Heck, Colombia even looks good.

["EVEN" Colombia?? What are you, some sort of racist, that you can only go to white northern nations??]

Columbia???? You're joking right???

I think he said Colombia, which is a country. Columbia is much harder to get into.

[Not if you're a trangendered Hispanic African-American lesbian. You can even get a scholarship.]

if the entire planet is going to go to hell, thanks to the greed of a few, I want to be around people who read books, not the morons I see everywhere behaving as if they were on a reality TV show while never lifting their eyes from their anti social "texting" culture.

[u mad bro?]

There are problems with this. . . . You will be a foreigner there. And you are totally misinformed if you think other countries treat immigrant people better. In fact . . . the US treats its legal immigrants better than almost every other country treats theirs (if not every country.) . . . Plus, since you're foreign born, don't think your voice is going to count for anything with the government of the country you move to. It isn't. . . .

[DUmmie caseymoz, expect a Kewpie Doll to soon be migrating to your mailbox.]

Basically if you are going to leave your home country then it better be because of total persecution. You will trade the set of problems you know for a new and broader set. You will lose at least 25% of your earning power and your experience and qualifications will also be downgraded or erased.

[Sorry, DUmmie KurtNYC, there are immigration quotas on Kewpies arriving in DUmmieland. Only 1 per day.]

Consider New Zealand if you get the chance.

[If not, consider ZZZZZZzzzzland.]

I would go to France . . .

[That would be Nice.]

but only if the entire family would go too.

[Who needs them? C'mon, what have you got Toulouse? By the way, DUmmie graham4anything, I hear there's a place in France where they don't wear underpants. You may like that.]

Past Generations Did Have It Worse, But We're Regressing Back Into Their Time. Meanwhile, other nations continue to advance.

[Yes, please GO to one of those advanced places. You know, someplace like Zimbabwe, Somalia, Cuba, North Korea, Iran--hey, even Egypt now! Arab Spring, baby!]

a very bad contingent, that has festered, is trying to make America into their new Atlantis.

[Hail, Atlantis!]

They are a loud minority. They think they have it in the bag. . . .

[In the teabag.]

We have let ourselves be cowed by those loud mouths.

[Don't be cowed! Moove!]

I'm in my 50's, and there isn't a snowball's chance in hell that "voting" is going to reverse the slide into fascism in my lifetime.

[All your "vote" are belong to us.]

Maybe you could move to Oz, that wizard is pretty cool.

[Follow the mellow brick road!]

Adios!

[¡Vaya con Gaia!]

would love to move to Great Britain but . . . I would never be able to move there. I . . . know how expensive it is.

That's the problem with all of Europe. It's just too expensive for most of us.

[Welcome to Socialism!]

Food is cheaper in Germany than in the US.

[Hamburgers are plentiful there.]

We went to Ojai yesterday. . . . It was like being in another country.

[Apparently, Ojai is some "new age mecca" near Los Angeles. This appeals to another DUmmie . . .]

I am going to plan a trip, it's not to far away for me. I saw a documentary about a famous ceramic artist, a woman whose name I can't recall. . . .

[Ojai Simpson?]

Beatrice Wood- her studio is still there. . . . I treasure her book- "I Shock Myself."

[I thought benburch was the author of "I Shock Myself."]

I am a ceramicist.

[Confession is always the first step.]

LA is a cesspool of rabid roaches crawling over one another. . . .

[That's racist!]

What we need is a community on DU. A community set aside just for the discussion of expatriot locales. . ..

[Can we question your expatriotism now?]

Maybe we could move en masse, the whole DU community off-shoring to a new land.

[OH PLEASE! OH PLEASE OH PLEASE OH PLEASE OH PUH-LEEEEEZE!!!!!!!!]

There has been talk of this in the past on DU- creating a DU community in RL.

["In RL"?? In Rio Linda? In Russki Land? In the Republic of Looneytoonia?]

Finding like minded people is not so easy, I guess that's why we're all here!

[There in DUmmieland, where you're searching for people with, like, minds.]

I daydream about leaving every day.

[I nightmare about you staying.]

I want to leave too. This country is done. . . . I'm now out of work for a full year with no prospects in sight.

[Is that you, Anthony Weiner?]

What a bunch of malarky. The GOP's old, white men are dying out. . . . They are showing all the signs of a party about to fade into the background.

[I can see November from my house, and I'm not seeing what you're seeing.]

What you fail to recognize is this: For every old pasty white man that should have died ten years ago, there are a THOUSAND roaches in the GOP woodwork, who are far more insane, set to take the old guard's place. . . . don't criticize the realists for knowing the lights are about to go out.

[A thousand points of roach. Yes, we are FAR more insane, we are crawling out of the woodwork, and we are coming for YOU! BWAHAHAHAHA!!!]

do not begrudge us who had the foresight to see the holes in the ship early on. Do not begrudge us for acting early. Do not begrudge those who had hope and now choose to leave with what little they have left. . . . Don't begrudge us. We don't begrudge you for staying. We worry about you. . . . So, don't begrudge us.

[Do NOT begrudge DUmmie 6502, who apparently multiple personalities, perhaps as many as 6,502.]

DU is the echo chamber that magnifies the negatives.

[DU is the wacko chamber that magnetizes the nutcases.]

Your prediction that an Obama re-election (right now about a 50-50 shot) will somehow turn the country around is so demented, I wonder if you're a mole. . . . He is weak, "centrist" (meaning far to the right of Ronald Reagan), and completely incapable of leading people to do anything except show up at the polls.

[DUmmie Doctor J thinks Obama is "far to the right of Ronald Reagan." And DUmmie Doctor J calls OTHER people demented!]

People don't live for thousands of years.

[You wanna bet?]


We tried to emigrate to Canada...They told us... in a polite, Canadian manner... that we were too old and that all we'd do is be a burden to their health care system.

[Wha-WHAAA??? Kind, compassionate Canada?? The socialist health-care utopia?? I don't believe it! Next you'll tell us that their taxes are higher!]

Looking at it from the Canadian perspective, I wouldn't let us in, either.

[No health care for you!]

I have had the emigration bug at many moments in this past year.

[I think you're confusing that with the clap.]

You could resettle Detroit. Seriously.

[Michael Moore could resettle an entire city block.]

Emigrate to California, Oregon and Washington for starters. . . .

[Keep going. Go west, young DUmmie! About another 50 miles west.]

We only lack that moment of crystallization- like Neo in the "Matrix" - and then resolving to WALK THE PATH!

[WALK THE PATH! WEAR THE BEAR! NEO-CRYSTALLIZE THE MOMENT!]

Finland tempts me. But I'd just hate to be "that guy" who makes everyone speak English, because I'm too old and slow to figure out that bird chirp-chirpy language they have.

[NO ONE can understand Finnish. Not even the Finns. Finland tempts you?? It's dark, it's cold, no one can understand what people are saying, everybody's drunk, if they're not drunk they're commiting suicide--no, Finland is not. . . . Well, on second thought. . . .]

My grandson is bi-lingual. . . .

[Well, he's still your grandson. Accept him for who he is.]

Why doesn't anyone mention Venezuela? It is a worker's paradise.

[OK, DUmmie FrodosPet (478 posts), I am calling you out as a LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

Wherever you go .... there you are.

[And THAT, my friends, is the main problem for any DUmmie wanting to find a nice place to live!]

20 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please all you dummies find another country. One where there will be skittle-shitting unicorns? (Yuck) Hopey-changey works, Karl Marx was not a drunken fool

10:51 PM  
Blogger tsiya said...

Be nice, don't do anything to discourage them! Tell them about the nice weather in Zimbabwe.

11:01 PM  
Blogger 98ZJUSMC said...

In fact . . . the US treats its legal immigrants better than almost every other country treats theirs (if not every country.) . . . Plus, since you're foreign born, don't think your voice is going to count for anything with the government of the country you move to. It isn't. . . .

These idiots should see how they treat illegals. The lightbulb just never gets very bright with these retards.


tsiya said...
Be nice, don't do anything to discourage them! Tell them about the nice weather in Zimbabwe.

11:01 PM


Due to their intense Gorebal Warming beliefs, we could perhaps sell them some lovely unfrozen tundra in th Artic. Tell the they can start their own colony and the like. We can even go up and check on their progress in about 6 mnths or so.

1:49 AM  
Anonymous The ULTIMATE Man said...

When these idiots go (if they ever do) I hope they take Troglafuck with them....that idiot is getting on my last nerve.

1:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya

7:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How great it would be for these tools to actually follow through.

7:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Reading the other comments in the thread about not being able to emigrate to Canada, it's painfully obvious how stupid the DUmmies really are.

You can't be a Canadian citizen without a guaranteed job, a needed skill, and money. And the DUmmies profess to understand that.

YET, here in the good ol' USA, we're supposed to welcome and sustain ANY immigrant that steps foot (legally and illegally) in our country. How, as a Nation, is that feasible?? Are we supposed to continually burden the system with welfare-receiving immigrants?

Dear God, Liberals truly are ignorant.

8:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Still trying to figure out what RL is. Republic of Lebanon? Ralph Lauren?

8:24 AM  
Anonymous envisio said...

""""Emigrating to another nation is extremely difficult, but people do it every day when conditions in their native lands get so bad they have no choice."""""

I know they do. Like those women in Africa that are raped multiple times every single day. Like those women in Iran who have their nose and ears cut off for reading a book. Like the Somolian who's father was murdered, his mother raped and his siblings starved to death.

And what was your "problem" DUmiie? The local McDonalds too far to walk to? Can't get a signal on your iPhone? You have to (GASP!) work, and pay for things! You can't get your government to give you a new house? OMFG! Did Starbucks give you a cold coffee now you are distraught and need to go on disability??? You poor soul! I am going to book you a oneway ticket to North Korea. There, they will treat you like a king.

10:03 AM  
Anonymous Elrond HUbbard said...

The DUmmies have nothing but distain for "old, pasty white men".

Yet they want to emmigrate Finland, Canada,New Zealand or northern Europe; nations that are, of course, run by old, pasty white men. But these are old, pasty white men who would, in theri fantasies, shower the DUmmies with free stuff---free health care, free college education, generous pensions and lots of holidays.

Sadly hese nations have no use for untalented,unskilled, unmonied cellar dwellers like DUmmmie nation.

"There has been talk of this in the past on DU- creating a DU community in RL."

"RL" = "Real Life". The DUmmies want to create a genuine Dummie community, think Jim Jones or "Lord of the Flies".

10:16 AM  
Anonymous envisio said...

"""The ULTIMATE Man said...
When these idiots go (if they ever do) I hope they take Troglafuck with them....that idiot is getting on my last nerve."""

Troglafag will be here soon. He has to wake up first, around noon, and take the ball sack out of his mouth before having his morning joint and JackDaniels spiked herbal tea. It may be a while after that because it takes time to scour the internet looking for people to annoy.

10:31 AM  
Anonymous envisio said...

Justin Bieber = Canada
Charlize Theron = Africa
1000s of other musicians and actors that are hyphen-americans.
Tens of thousands of Asian shop owners.
Asian and middle eastern scientists and doctors that came to America for PhDs.
Their kives suck.
Then hundreds of thousands of humble LEGAL hyphen-american citizens that work everyday and buy their kids iPads and Gap jeans.
Then, of course, the ILLEGAL foriegners who suck the american taxpayers dry and get free everything.

Yeah... their lives suck really bad.

11:11 AM  
Anonymous envisio said...

Oh I forgot to mention the people that come to America to escape REAL pursecution. I am not talking about whiney little hippies that cry because their government won't give them MORE free stuff. I mean REAL problems like murder, rape genocide, tyranny.

I would like one of these spoiled brat unemployed pothead DUmmies to talk to one of these people and tell them about why they think `Merrika sucks.

Remember the old saying about the guy who complained about having no shoes until he met the guy who had no feet. And remember always, no matter how bad you think you have it, someone else has it worse.

Goddamn liberal crybaby hipster pussies. I hate them sonsabitches. Get a job and stop wasting my oxygen.

11:26 AM  
Anonymous Mike From Stumptown said...

A DUmmie said:
Emigrate to California, Oregon and Washington for starters. . . .

Please don't, there are too many of you "progressives" here already.

2:48 PM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

"Emigrate to California...for starters...." - A DU Moonbat

May as well - the Troglaman Clones/Moonbats have already rendered that state virtually unlivable and have destroyed that state's economic future. May as well let them reap what they sow...plus at least we will know where they all are if they go to CA. I doubt they can do more damage to that state, I think it's already screwed for the next several decades.

11:51 PM  
Blogger 98ZJUSMC said...

liberal crybaby hipster pussies

This subspecies is actually very entertaining to observe in it's native habitat. It markings include a clueless demeanor with dull eyes, slack jaw and numerous piercings done by the tribal shaman, Jose the Barber.

It's range is rather limited as it lacks the survival skills and adaptability to function outside of it's primary habitat, Basementus Momulus for more than four or five hours at a time.

When they gather in groups, they have been known to fashion primitive drums out of locally discarded material and bang indiscriminately, sometimes for days at a time. Chanting repeatedly, Booosh and Joooos, evidently, items of intense pleasure to them.

Liberal crybaby hipster pussies have acquired the ability to operate free government cellphones, which they have no idea where they came from, who manufactured them and the fact that someone else paid for them.

Lacking the ability to hunt, liberal crybaby hipster pussies are primarily Cheeto-tarians, preferring to wait for a family member to provide food.

LCHP's often steal from themselves, rape each other and screech incoherently about, what appears to be some sort of revolution. It is difficult to discern exactly what it is they wish to revolt against.

Poorly educated, the LCHP's learn by copying other LCHP's and mimicking things they hear on television. Tribal culture has it that they do this to appear intelligent and have something to do other than fling their own poo at each other.

12:28 AM  
Blogger Son Of The Godfather said...

"I am preparing to leave and live elsewhere."

Translation: "I Googled "vacation", saw a picture of a girl in a bikini, and jacked off to internet porn."

12:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear DUmmies:
It's a free country, so leave if you want to.
By "free", I mean you have the liberty to do something, not that it is a moneyless society; there is no such thing. I know in your drug and alcohol fueled delusions you think such a society is not only possible, but the only reason this country doesn't have such a society is because of the greed of the evil bourgeoisie oppressors of the proletariat who own businesses and provide jobs to those with more self-pride and ambition than you DUmmies.
So, feel free to leave at any time. If you think the US should be more like Europe and less like, well, the US, leave; go to Europe. I am sure they want more unskilled, uneducated social parasites like yourselves.

7:07 AM  
Anonymous Corona said...

By all means, leave.

12:01 AM  
Anonymous Corona said...

"You poor soul! I am going to book you a oneway ticket to North Korea. There, they will treat you like a king."

Here King! Here King!

3:34 PM  

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