Tuesday, September 09, 2008

DUmmie Microanalyze Palin's Religion Digging For Dirt

The DUmmies are suddenly microanalying the finer points of religion. No, they haven't suddenly decided to become theologians. Their whole purpose is to dig up dirt, any dirt, on Sarah Palin. So far all their dirt digging expeditions have yielded nothing. However, this time they think they have found dirt that they desperately hope will stick as you can see in this DUmmie THREAD titled, "CNN:Palin was Catholic UNTIL she got SAVED!" Yeah, they think because she "rejected" Catholicism while a child, that is somehow going to cost her the Catholic vote. So let us now watch the DUmmies desperately grasp at yet another straw in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if the large Hadron supercollider tomorrow will be able to detect the DUmmie Dimension, is in the [brackets]:


CNN:Palin was Catholic UNTIL she got SAVED!

[That's it? Yeah, that "scandal" ranks right up there with ripping tags off mattresses but continue...]

Oh my god did I just hear that? In her own words, when she joined the pentacostal church, she got SAVED. So this means that, according to Sarah Palin's beliefs, Catholics are not saved? I guess you have to speak in tongues for that. They also talked about Alaska being a beacon in end times. And she was on stage with him when he said it. This was Blitzer reporting.

THIS IS OUR GAME CHANGER, FOLKS!

[Break out the Freudenschade victory champagne!!! And now on to the other DUmmies...]

I say we keep this one kicked all night

[In order for the thread to grow enough to be harvested by the DUmmie FUnnies.]

Evangelicals don't have very high opinions of Catholics.
"Not being saved" is the least of what they often accuse Catholics of.

[I've heard evangelicals accuse Catholics of not being able to tolerate Near Beer or summer sausage. Start the scandal machine!!!]

Assembly of God churches don't have very high opinions about any other faith. As far as I can tell, they don't even particularly trust other evangelicals. They truly believe unless you belong to THEIR church, and only their church, you're going to hell.

Catholics going to hell? Check!
Presbyterians going to hell? Check!
Baptists going to hell? Check!

[DUmmies going to asylum? Check!]

I went through years of private, Catholic schools and let me tell you--Catholics don't think very highly of Pentecostals, either.

They are seen as wackos. This is what I think it so beautiful about all of this. Catholics are a big voting block and there is a large contingent of them that is Independent. I imagine that a Pentecostal is much further from their philosophy than Barack Obama's Christianity.

[DUmmies are seen as wackos and what I think is so beautiful about all this is they are the gift that keeps on giving, including this thread.]

if her church is anything like my in-laws, they have all kinds of anti-Catholic pamphlets around.

[Better pat Sarah Palin down to see if she is carrying any Jack Chick comix.]

She's already pissed off a lot of Catholics because of the community organizer smears, this should be the last straw for more of them.

[Yeah, being a Chicago community organizer is at the center of the Catholic faith.]

The Pentecostal thing will backfire on her big time. Most people view that sect as nothing more than a bunch of kooks.

[Most people view DUmmies as nothing more than a bunch of kooks.]

Paging the Catholic vote!

[Please overlook Obama's fourth trimester pro-abortion stand!]

a lot of them are sadly one-issue voters and Palin's rabidly anti-abortion. Pelosi's being called on the carpet about her pro-choice beliefs.
I think it's in Catholics best interest - as it is in all of ours - to stop this woman, but there's a very reactionary streak in Catholic leadership.

[Which includes the Pope, all the cardinals, and bishops since they all oppose abortion.]

I love a good religious war -- don't you?

[Too bad for you that the Thirty Years War ended in the 17th century.]

No but now it is news to the nation! It was reported on CNN. Mainstream media.

[And the nation yawned.]

CNN's piece tonight will open a lot of eyes to this crazy biatch!!

[This was posted yesterday. And guess what? NOBODY cares...except for DUmmies.]

Ooooh she's a Jack Chick kinda gal!

[A Jack Chick Chick.]

Well, they've written off the Jewish vote, now the Catholic vote. I'm wondering why I'm so nervous about this election.

[Because you're going to lose?]

I'm Catholic. Just about every born again I know indicates that
they were 'saved'. Meaning, that they came later in life to believe that Jesus was the Lord and Savior. I say we tout the message that Catholics (as well as most Christians) got it right from the beginning and have been sitting at the Lord's table since they were baptized.

[Not that you care one way or another. Your whole motive is to get the Lightworker elected.]

Yes, by her getting re-baptized, it was a direct slap in the face to the Catholic faith.

[Stated the DUmmie biblical scholar.]

I'm going to see my very Catholic family next week. I wonder what they'll think.

[They'll think that you're still a DUmmie.]

Do you hear that, oh ye mighty Catholics of Ohio and Pennsylvania and Michigan?

[They heard and they yawned.]

I hope this comes up in the debate so that Biden can KICK ASS!

[Biden. The devout pro-abortion "Catholic."]

Catholics are not Christian. They are the false Church. That's a basic tenet on fundamentalist dogma!

[Strange that there has been NO religious civil war in this country.]

ZOD is not pleased with either of these Religions

[Neither is the Mighty Nebuchadnezzar.]

We must do all we can to rip the hide off this creature!

[Feel the love!]

I'll believe it when I see the paper trail. Parish, priest, date, certificate, parents' certificates, godparents, maybe photos.

[Paper trail baptism.]

How is this a game changer? I sure hope we aren't counting on this to swing things around. This will have no impact whatsoever.

[And this DUmmie WINS a Kewpie Doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity!]

May not be a game changer, but it'll piss Catholics off.

[It'll piss DUmmies off that it will have absolutely NO effect on the election's outcome.]

36 Comments:

Blogger Son Of The Godfather said...

Uhm... I was raised Catholic.
The only thing that "offends" me about this "OMG! Can-You-Believe-It!?!?" scandal du jour is the stupidity of DUmmies thinking it makes a smidge of difference.

Do I want a president who believes it's o.k. to slaughter post-failed-abortion babies, or do I want a V.P. who's greatest failing is claiming she has been "saved"?

Tough choice...

3:57 PM  
Anonymous Marty Moonbat said...

I've got the story that will finally finish off MS. Moosebreath, so you 'pugs better be scared!!

I know this guy who knows this guy that knows a guy who visited a guy in California that knows a guy who went on an Alaskan cruise, and he said that when he was up there a rumor was going around about Palin's daughter having a baby. The rumor said that hadn't seen the baby in a while, the same thing happened a few years earlier when the Palins apparently had a 6th kid...who apparently disappeared. Well frigging turns out she ate these babies...Fucking Palin eats babies!!! This story is going to ruin her!!! She's almost as bad as people who eat veal!! She's going sink the GOP ticket like a stone.

HAHA!! So there you have it pug assholes!! Right from the mouth of the guy on the Alaskan cruise that knows the guy in California that was visted by the guy who knows the guy that knows the guy that I know. Let's see you rube rw'rs destroy this evidence chain...HAHA Palin is done!! Nothing will stand in the way of the destiny of the Obama!!! Kneel before your master puke assholes!!! HAHA!!!

4:09 PM  
Anonymous Anon 1:50 said...

Being unashamedly anti-abortion is probably the cause for the double-digit uptick in the Catholic polling numbers.

QUOTE:"At a rate of 54 percent, Catholic respondents believe McCain’s choice of Palin would help the Republican ticket, while 31 percent believe it would hurt the campaign. Seven percent believed it would not make a difference."

Note the source:
http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/new.php?n=13691

As for Jews?

QUOTE:"The fact that she has chosen to keep a flag of Israel on her wall (in the governor's office) tells her she has Israel in her heart."

Again; note the attribution: Huffpo. There's a bed of Palin-supporters, right?
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/09/02/gop-jews-defend-palin-she_n_123340.html

The DUmmie assbiters are so ridiculously far off on this, it's like shooting hamsters with a howitzer. Really. They need an adult. Badly.

Kids, you're going to have to find substance; positions that the GOP holds and show why the Dems have a better position. Attacking the person (ad hominem), her children, her faith, her hairstyle has done nothing but bring you low in the eyes of the electorate and...

Why am I revealing this? Crap!

Nevermind, DUmmies! Yeah! Attack her faith! She probably drinks tap water and doesn't recycle her toilet paper!

Go get her! You'll PROVE that ALL conservatives are EVIL!

Here's a rumor for ya! She's probably had 12 babies and ate the prettiest ones! Bwah-hah-hah-haaaaa!

Nitwits.

4:55 PM  
Anonymous Corona said...

I know a bunch of DUmmies who're gonna be all tuckered out tonight. You've had a busy day! Off to beddy-bye!

5:16 PM  
Anonymous elrond hubbard said...

The DUmmies are reduced to searching for a deus ex machina in the form of a Palin scandal. To date, they've grasped at and discarded: 1)the Downs Syndrome baby scandal, 2)the pregnant daughter scandal, 3)the book banning scandal, 4) the shooting endangered species from a helicopter scandal, 5)the cheating on husband scandal, 6) the troopergate scandal, and probably about ten more that they've already forgotten. Today its the changing Sarah's religion scandal,
but it's not a winner, it's just a Dummie bong water fantasy.

This frantic flailing about is typical of the DUmmies, especially when thet're in a panic mode. They're so focused on Palin they've forgotten about McCain, Jughead and Plugs.

5:41 PM  
Anonymous DumbAss Tanker said...

Well, they have raised "Clueless" to an art form with that thread.

5:45 PM  
Anonymous Keith said...

THIS IS OUR GAME CHANGER, FOLKS!

Is this the 33rd game changer this week? Or the 34th? The previous "game changers" have resulted in a substantial shift in favor of McCain/Palin. I thought it was a game changer when DUmmies exposed Palin as a White Supremacist? Or when they exposed her fake pregnancy? Or her book banning time machine? Or her secession dreams? Or...well, you get the picture.

By all means, DUmmies, have some more rope. You attack, she gets more popular. Meanwhile Obamessiah cannot campaign in key states because he has to fund raise in 45,000 sq ft San Francisco mansions due to his genius decision to forgo public financing. That should play well with the "gun clingers" in Pennsylvania. While McCain and Palin are campaigning in Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Ohio. Talking to working class people and independents, drawing pretty sizeable crowds. I never in a million years would have thought McCain would be President, but I refused to believe that once again the Democrats would snatch defeat out of the jaws of victory. I am humble enough to admit when I am wrong. Unless Obama pulls his head out of his ass, yesterday, he will go down in history as the most spectacular choke artist in electoral history. Simply amazing.

5:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

DUmmies have their panties in a wad because Sarah doesn't belieeve the Obamessiah is the "choosen one".
I'm waiting for troggy to relate his experiance when that nasty Nun hit him for spanking his monkey.
Here troggy troggy troggy. Come on boy.

Skul

6:42 PM  
Anonymous Adam said...

elrond, how could you forget about the secessionist scandal that was everywhere before it was debunked?

7:33 PM  
Anonymous Stix said...

Well, at least I give it to the Obama cool aid drinkers, they sure do go after women in both parties. Tearing down Hillary and now Palin. Way to get that women's vote morons.

Does Obama just want to loose with his idiotic gaffes and denigrating women.

The Party of reality my ass. the party of sexist assholes more like it.

8:01 PM  
Anonymous Ray said...

"Paging the Catholic vote!"

Sarah's not a Catholic, but the Catholics already know this, so why do the DUmmies bother?

"I love a good religious war -- don't you?"

Except, of course, the war against those Islamic terrorists. The DUmmies HATE that war!

8:04 PM  
Blogger The Gunslinger said...

Seriously, you have to feel sorry for them. Honestly. This is pathetic.

[Bwaaaaaahaaaaahaaaaaa....]

No...really.

9:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG I laughed my ass off at this post. I love this blog!

12:05 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Yeah, they think because she "rejected" Catholicism while a child, that is somehow going to cost her the Catholic vote." PJ

What? Is this what the DUmmies are thinking? I thought we were atheists. Heathens. I'm here to tell you right now, mister, that real DUmmies don't really get the Catholic thing and anybody telling you differently is a DUmmie spy. Or a wingbot double agent.

I, for example, am a Baptist atheist. I have known Catholic atheists but consider them suspicious for all the well known reasons - The Templar Knights, for example. And never, ever, trust a Methodist atheist. Ever.

But you can trust a Baptist atheist and I'm here to tell you the Catholic atheists are full of shit. You can take that to the bank. All that Latin bullshit...come on, for Christ's sake.

1:15 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"The Party of reality my ass. the party of sexist assholes more like it." stix

And you dumbshits never ever said anything even approaching sexist about Hillary. Don't make me prove you wrong, stix, you hypocritical jackass.

Look. Palin's a woman. Does that mean anything critical said about her is sexist? No, you chimps. Tell you what, stix, why don't you find a sexist quote from the left about Palin and prove your manhood (as opposed to your pussified cries of 'sexism', you whiner).

1:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

http://hillbuzz.wordpress.com/2008/09/08/soetorobama-followers-on-democrat-underground-create-ebay-listing-to-sell-trig-palin-a-4-month-old-with-down-syndrome/

As if DU can't get any sicker. Too bad the thread was shut down.

1:57 AM  
Anonymous Adam said...

yes, anon. Then, the DUmmies realized they really screwed up doing that, and act like it never happened. One DUmmy who I guess hadn't seen the thread before it was deleted actually claimed that it was really just conservatives who made it up to frame DU!

9:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Poor little troggy. True to form.
Poor little fellow is predictable as sunrise.
Foolish little man.
Don't forget to call me naughty names when you reply troggy.


Skul

11:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Troggy is a classic example of a liberal: They quickly lose the debate on facts and then resort to insults and cursewords. It reminds one of an adolescent that does not get his way.

Anyone that self describes as a "baptist atheist" does not have any idea of the meaning of words that he uses.

McCain's team is playing to win. Obama is resorting to calling Palin a pig. Ha, ha, ha.

12:30 PM  
Anonymous DumbAss Tanker said...

You can put lipstick on Troglamman but he's still Troglaman. He will however be very upset with you if it doesn't match the dress and those cute pumps.

1:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tiffany Case: "Do you prefer redheads or brunettes?"

Bond: "Well, as long as the collar and cuffs match... "

2:20 PM  
Anonymous elrond hubbard said...

T-bone,

"Look. Palin's a woman."

Damn, thanks for that insight.

You're a lapsed Baptist and I understand that since I'm an agnostic myself. My wife, however, is an atheist and we have arguements over what religion not to raise the kids in.

3:24 PM  
Anonymous ahabers said...

This blog made me laugh and laugh! I cannot believe these out of touch losers actually believe conservatives will care about this, much less that it is a GAME CHANGER! OMG - I'm crying laughing. Are they serious? Thank you thank you thank you for creating this site.

3:36 PM  
Anonymous kayinmaine said...

My Barack speaks THE TRUTH!!!!!!!! Palin IS A PIG! Illuminati and ZOG controlled skinhead! Shes also the mother OF NONE OF THOSE KIDS!!!!111

Tomorrow, on the 9/11 anniversary, my Kucinich is going to both reveal perfect evidence Bush, Chainey, Aunt Thomasina Rice, Moossad and Halliburton perped 9/11 AND all the pregnant women Palin had killed to get those political prop kids!!!!111 You deranged lemmings need ME, the reality based to show you none of those prop children look alike!!!111

5:13 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Poor little troggy. True to form.
Poor little fellow is predictable as sunrise.
Foolish little man.
Don't forget to call me naughty names when you reply troggy." Skul

Jesus. "...predictable as a sunrise". "Don't forget to call me naughty names..." skul

Sure, my naughty little headbone. Whatever you want. You an Indigo Girl fan, by any chance? Babs? "Funny Girl"? Broadway production type of guy?

My inner homo, though awakened by your seductive poetry, has been adequately beaten down by my manly manliness. Nice try.

12:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

When a turd hits the ground, and there's no-one there to hear, does kay still make a sound?

12:16 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Troggy is a classic example of a liberal: They quickly lose the debate on facts and then resort to insults and cursewords. It reminds one of an adolescent that does not get his way." anon

Interesting you said that, dumbass. Because you're talking about lipstick. Here's what else has been happening while you blather on:

The highest unemployment rate in 5 years.

The nation's jobless rate shot to a five-year high.

Staggering job losses.

The skyrocketing deficit. The Congressional Budget Office said the U.S. budget deficit for fiscal 2008 -- $407 billion -- will be more than double the deficit for 2007, hit by the wars and a weak economy, and predicted it is likely to rise further in fiscal 2009.

The rising gas prices.

Record food prices.

The housing crisis. Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac.

The collapsing dollar.

The record foreclosures.

Stagnant wages.

You all have seen J Sidney using the expression "Putting lipstick on a pig" 6 or 7 times by now, haven't you? Because he's said it again and again and again.

So anon. By claiming Obama's ducking the issues is just too troglamatic to ignore. Wanna make a bet? Ray's probably feeling a little lonely being the only troglamatic dumbass.

12:47 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"You deranged lemmings need ME, the reality based to show you none of those prop children look alike!!!111" kay

...

Well. I'm flummoxed. Kay is either a well-intention liberal in need of an intervention or she's a phony. Being the cynic I am, I lean towards phony. But what the hell. You have to admit it's fun.

1:03 AM  
Anonymous Kirk Johnson said...

<< The highest unemployment rate in 5 years. >>

After five years of statistically full employment, that is a mathematical inevitability.


<< The nation's jobless rate shot to a five-year high. >>

Uh, you just said that...


<< Staggering job losses. >>

Did Whole Foods™ fire you from your bagboy position?


<< The skyrocketing deficit. >>

Which branch of government controls the pursestrings again?


<< The Congressional Budget Office said the U.S. budget deficit for fiscal 2008 -- $407 billion -- will be more than double the deficit for 2007, >>

And which party controls Congress?


<< hit by the wars and a weak economy, and predicted it is likely to rise further in fiscal 2009. >>

Nah. Nationalizing 1/7th of the economy and increasing the welfare state beyond LBJ's wettest dream will actually *lower* the deficit!


<< The rising gas prices. >>

Yawn.


<< Record food prices. >>

Forget Whole Foods™. That "organic" branding adds at least a 40% markup.


<< The housing crisis. >>

Idiots borrowing more money than they could afford having to -GASP!- face the consequences of their brainless decision. Quelle horror!


<< Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. >>

Don't forget Bernie Mack.


<< The collapsing dollar. >>

Rove was seen planting explosives at the base of the dollar thirty minutes before it "collapsed". BUSH KNEW!!!


<< The record foreclosures. >>

Was that 33 or 45 rpm?


<< Stagnant wages. >>

Bagger at Whole Foods™ isn't exactly a position ripe with advancement opportunities. Sorry...

3:08 AM  
Anonymous John Galt said...

"...The skyrocketing deficit. The Congressional Budget Office said the U.S. budget deficit for fiscal 2008 -- $407 billion ..."

In January the deficit was $160B -- then the altruist wealth re-distributors kicked in and spent $180B giving taxpayers' money to those who pay no taxes. They hoped that throwing that money away would stimulate the voters.

Despite all the evidence to the contrary, altruists/collectivists STILL think that throwing wealth away by rewarding those who do not produce it is a good thing. ** sigh **

9:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I must admit, troggy certainly has all the librul talking points. Too bad most are pure BS. Poor lad can't even cite references to back his claims. Prove it troggy. Don't bother quoting known libby sites, that doesn't cut it. Same goes for known far left political hacks and hollywood pukes. Just the facts, laddy, just the facts.

Sweet draems, honeybuns. Love ya.

Skul

(prepare for name-calling and sexual references in..3...2..)

6:46 PM  
Anonymous t said...

"Prove it troggy." anon

OK. Tell me what you need proven.

And shut up skul. Your sexual proclivity has become tiresome.

1:42 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Idiots borrowing more money than they could afford having to -GASP!- face the consequences of their brainless decision. Quelle horror!" kirk

Lending institutions lending to "Idiots borrowing more money than they could afford having to -GASP!- face the consequences of their brainless decision. Quelle horror!" have been, according to kirk, completely outwitted by the idiots.

Quelle horror, indeed, you fucking monkey. Lest you don't get it, people will borrow more money than they can afford. My tribe often will offer glass beads much more valuable than the sheepskins they're acquiring. This is why a simple credit check will most certainly identify someone who has bitten off more than they can chew. And yet the banking industry decided ignore this information in the spirit of making a quick buck. I bank at Wamu. I'm taking my money out this week. I'm sure countless others are too.

So when the Feds decided to bail out Freddie and Fannie, this isn't (ooo, so scary) socialism? Someone explain. Friggin hypocrites.

2:38 AM  
Anonymous john galt said...

t-man, most of the stupid loans made were arranged by brokers who were paid a percentage of the loan as a finders fee of sorts. The brokers had incentive to sign up any lamppost they could for a mortgage to get their 1% kickbacks.

The mortgagors were idiots for setting that kind of system up in the first place, and were idiots for not verifying documentation (when such was provided) as to mortgagee's ability to pay. In most cases they didn't give a damn because they packaged up all that toxic waste in to Mortgage Backed Securities and sold those to pension funds, money market funds, etc.

This had the result of transferring all the risk off the mortgage writer's books and liability onto the MBS buyers. MBSs are sorta like Russia: an enigma wrapped up in a mystery.

11:25 AM  
Anonymous mc said...

"So when the Feds decided to bail out Freddie and Fannie, this isn't (ooo, so scary) socialism? Someone explain. Friggin hypocrites."

Um they were already semi-federal institutions.

Bailout =/= nationalisation, even less does it = socialism.

2:12 AM  
Anonymous troglaman@yahoo. com said...

"The brokers had incentive to sign up any lamppost they could for a mortgage to get their 1% kickbacks." galt

And this is a strategy for success?

Let me say this again, just for giggles. You did this, galt. RepuliDUms did this. Every cent your paying for gas and your heating or cooling has been signed off by a RepubliDUm. Every soldier sent has been signed off by a RepubliDUm. Every cent you're now losing in your 401K has been signed off by a RepubliDUm.

And yet, you still believe. A study in psychosis.

2:28 AM  

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