Monday, January 31, 2011

"Homeless But Wireless Girl": Bobo plays the Victim Card

When a THREAD like "I talked to a homeless woman the other day" shows up in DUmmieland, guess what is sure to follow? You got it! A friendly visit from our favorite homeless DUmmie, none other than bobbolink, aka Bobo the Hobo.

Whenever the topic of homelessness or poverty comes up, and even when it doesn't, you can be sure that DUmmie bobbolink will be there, playing the Victim Card, whining and moaning, accusing her fellow DUmmies of not caring enough about the poor to DEMAND that she gets a free house and a healthy income simply for being Bobo the Hobo. And don't tell her to get a job! No sirree! How dare you! Don't you care about the poor?

Now you may wonder how a woman who claims to live in the back of a car has the means to be hooked into the internet, night and day, 24/7, in order to post in DUmmieland. Bu that's part of the wonder and the mystique of our Bobo! Besides, by playing the Victim Card, she was able last year to get Pitt to blow his top and threaten her physically and get himself suspended fromt he DUmp! That is quite an accomplishment, so let's cut her some slack.

In fact, before we get to the thread, let's sing this musical tribute to our "Homeless But Wireless Girl." Click the music link, go to about the 1:10 mark, and sing along!

Homeless But Wireless Girl
Tune: "Sadder But Wiser Girl" (starting at 1:10)

No helpless, hopeless, homeless, typical powerless hobo is she
This Bobo gal spins webs world-wide or so it--now listen boy
A gal who trades on all that poverty
Merely has to post her correspondence for our comedy
The only affirmative she will write
Is if you publicize her plight
No modest, meager, measly soupline shelter--no sir!
For no cheap handout will do the trick, she can tell you that right now

She bears the slurs
How can suffering be compared to hers?
She's quite the star
For a lady who lives inside a car
She'll raise a big stink
She's a victim, that's our bobbolink
The homeless but wireless girl is she!

No bed-and-boarding room for Bobo the Hobo--no sir!
Our bobbolink wants digs the Donald never knew
She prefers to have a home
Like a villa outside Rome
No matter how much she keeps demanding
All the time it keeps expanding
No humble home will satisfy Bobo--no sir!
Why, she's the pauper and you're the prince, you see? Pop!

She'll howl, she'll cry
At a casual careless thread reply
She's quite the wit
She managed to tombstone William Pitt
I laugh real hard
When Bobo can play her victim card
The homeless but wireless girl's the girl for me
The homeless but wireless girl is she!

So let us now go to the DUmp and await Bobo's arrival, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, the wag tailoring the doggerrel, Charles Henrickson, wondering if Pitt can pull a few strings and get Bobo a job as an internationally bestselling author/bouncer, is in the [brackets]:

I talked to a homeless woman the other day..

[Yes, DUmmie Fumesucker, how good and noble you are to stoop to talk to a poor oppressed homeless woman! Oh, btw, did you do anything to HELP her? . . . {hypocrickets chirping} . . .]

She told me that the day before that was even colder and rainy she spent all day in her sleeping bag under the bridge where she lives, she then mentioned that she can't leave her stuff for more than a few minutes because someone worse off than her is likely to steal what few meager possessions she has.

[She should do like Bobo and sleep in a car with an internet connection.]

It's hard to get much more poor than living under a damn bridge like a f***ing troll in cold, wet weather.


Yes, poor people in Egypt are truly suffering, my point is that we have people that are arguably as badly off right here. . . .

[Want like an Egyptian . . .]

Americans are so apathetic. . . .

people are content to put in their 8 hours and come home to an evening of American Idol. . . .

[They don't care about the American Idle.]

I have . . . taken part in many demonstrations. . . .

[But don't ask me to actually HELP a homeless person!]

Reagan cut funding for all the State mental hospitals. . . .

[Fortunately, DUmmieland opened its doors.]

it ALSO had to do with the ACLU enacting new legislation that said that people can't be incarcerated or "held" if they are not "a danger to themselves or others".

[No no! Can't be any other factors! Must blame it all on Raygun!]

[Wait a minute? Who's this I see coming to the white courtesy phone? Why yes, it's . . .]

So, you think the answer, then, is to lock up everyone living on the streets???????

[Yes, it's BOBBOLINK, already whipping out her trusty Victim Card!] and I didn't say that.

[Doesn't matter! Bobo needs someone to go after!]

It was sure the conclusion that one would draw. After all, being "a danger to yourself" IS grounds for locking people up. And depriving them of all rights, I might add. So, yes... it is actually what you said. It is time to think through the consequences of our thought processes.

[GUILTY! in the Court of Bobo!]

And being homeless, because this SOCIETY doesn't care to make sure that ALL have housing. . . .

[FREE Nice Big Houses for ALL! And none of this cheap stuff!]

It really doesn't have to do with "hospitals", and the thing to remember is that by repeating that, it continues the destructive myth that most homeless people are "mentally ill", which is NOT the case.

[DUmmie bobbolink is perfectly SANE, NOT "mentally ill," and she resents you for even insinuating that! Soooo . . . why hasn't she gone out and tried to get a job, you ask? Don't go there!]

Take your self-righteous "I need to beat someone up" schtick elsewhere.

[Ruh roh! DUmmie whathehell gives it right back to DUmmie bobbolink! Watch it, whathehell, you don't want to end up tombstoned like Wee Willie Pitt! Picking on a poor homeless woman! Shame on you!]

there are a lot of organizations. HOWEVER, the problem is, they exist soley for charity to individual people. That can NEVER "solve" the problem.. it only serves to keep it going.

["Charity to individuals am BAD!" in Bobo's Bizarro World!}

Until We, The People are committed to providing low-income housing for all who need it, homelessness will continue.

[Until YOU, The People with Jobs and Money and Stuff, are committed to giving me, Bobo the Hobo, a Free Nice Big House--none of this cheap stuff--you SIMPLY DON'T CARE!]


Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

bobolink is just like Troglaman, sad to say....and that ain't good.

2:40 AM  
Anonymous Anon 1:50 said...

It's the self-righteous insistence that charity should be forced on all that is so repulsive.

I am reminded of a short-lived 'movement' in Detroit a few years back, wherein a gaggle of welfare recipients announced that they were going to form a Union...

They wanted more comfortable seats, air conditioning, and better snacks during the free ride, I guess.

Oh, how we trembled at the thought of them going on strike and not worki...

Oh, wait.

That's probably why it failed.

6:47 AM  
Anonymous envisio said...

"""Until We, The People are committed to providing low-income housing for all who need it, homelessness will continue."""
Better yet, I think people who work for a living and buy their own house should move out and give thier house to a lazy bum.
You know, my kids think that our house and our electricity and our food magically appears out of thin air. They have no idea what it takes to make these things happen. They think that stuff is JUST THERE. This is fine because they are just average 12 year olds. But at some point they will start to realize that if they want something they will have to work for it. They will realize there is no house fairy.
Now, I think that DUmmies lack this development whereas they are purpetually 12 years old in thinking that things should be handed to them by some unknown entity and actually get mad and pitch a fit when the things that they are given are not good enough.
My daughter thinks she is being deprived because I GAVE her and I pay fo her a regular flip-phone instead of a smartphone. She thinks I don't care and have no compassion for her media needs. The same thing is going on in DUmmie BoBo's head.

12:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe if the government enacted legislation to force everyone to buy a house, homelessness would go away. At least that is how ObummerCare is supposed to fix health care.

3:37 PM  
Anonymous KayInMaine said...



6:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ever notice how DUmmies love to trot out Jesus (and only when it's convenient!) to make a point about charity?

What they never seem to process is that Jesus did not use the government to do His charity work. Nor did He advocate doing it that way.

He said, "Love thy neighbor", not "The government shall mandate that you shall love thy neighbor."

Personal responsibility, in any form, is foreign to these idiots.

9:17 AM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

Excellent point Anon...

By the way, wife in waiting, KayInMaine, is sleeping around you.

4:42 PM  
Anonymous Corona said...

Thanks for the warning KayInMaine. In 10 years we'll just look for the ugliest, hairiest 10-year-old on Earth and say "Hey, we know your parents!"

7:40 PM  
Anonymous DumbAss Tanker said...

Surprising news from Kay, I would have thought a hyena and rabid badger were mutually infertile.

Maybe they're just trying for 'Brave in the attempt.' Or something.

11:38 AM  

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