Monday, July 07, 2008

"My mom is SUCH a bitch"



Ever have an adult child move back home to take over your house, your phone, your food and make up their own rules in your house? Add to that their being ungrateful about your hospitality because of a sense of entitlement and you get something like this DUmmie THREAD entitled "My mom is SUCH a bitch."

Here we see an example of the liberal mindset. A grown person moves in with her mother, presumably because she cannot support herself, and complains about the lack of freedom and privacy. Liberals will talk and talk about a "social safety net;" what they really are talking about isn't a safety net, it's a hammock.

So let us now observe a clear example of DUmmie entitlement and ingratitude in Bolshevik red with the comments of your humble guest correspondent, Paul Heinzman in [the brackets].

My mom is SUCH a bitch

[That makes you a dirty dog.]

I really can't deal with this at all.

Since I moved back here 6 weeks ago, I have talked to each of my three closest friends ONCE each. Why is that? Because I can't have a goddamn phone conversation in this house.


[How dare she want someone not tying up her phone and running up her bill.]

Last night I went to go call my friend Clay and my mom told me that if I wanted to make a phone call I should go in my room. I said "No, I'm going in the back yard." My mom then said well why didn't I go in the front yard so she could go in the back yard to smoke while I was on the phone. I again reiterated that I was GOING to go in the back yard to talk on the phone and if she wanted to smoke SHE could go in the front yard.

[You'll smoke where I tell you you can smoke, Mom.]

So I go out back and I can my friend (for the second time in six weeks.)

I'm on the phone for 5 goddamn minutes and she comes out SCREECHING that I ate all the Fritos and now she doesn't have anything to eat with her ham sandwich. Basically that bitch FORCED me to get off the phone after 5 minutes because I was doing something that wasn't about her.


[You did something that WAS about her: You ate her Fritos.]

(I ate the last of the Fritos on Tuesday; there's Cheez-Its, there's cottage cheese, there's basically all kinds of stuff she could have had, but NO, I'm the bitch because I ate all the Fritos and didn't tell her. And never mind the fact that I don't eat meat OR tomatoes, and I've been subsisting on macaroni and cheese and beans out of a can for weeks.)


[She doesn't even have the common courtesy to stock her pantry with proper vegan food. You poor child.]

Then, later in the evening, she was getting ready for bed and I told her I was going out in the carport for a minute. I unlatched the gate to the carport, and she bursts out of the house asking if everything's okay because the dogs were upset. Like, DUH, that's why I told you I was going in the carport for a minute. It's like being 5 years old... honestly. I can't go in the goddamn carport to get my goddamn CD's, which shouldn't be in the carport ANYWAYS, without her acting like it's a crisis.

[She probably assumed you were going out there to smoke dope...or GARLIC.]

I really can't deal with this shit at all.

[And you shouldn't have to. Your mother should just rent an apartment somewhere. Now on to witness the DUmmie reaction to this obvious infringement on DUmmie XemaSab's entitlement to free food and housing.]

She is the one acting like a five year old in these examples.

[Like a five year old homeowner who's grown accustomed to having Fritos rather than Cheez-Its or cottage cheese with her ham sandwich.]

The mother is having to deal with someone coming back home to live and all that that entails, such as the Fritos being snarfed and not replaced. She'd probably thought the house was hers (at last), and now she has to share it again - with someone who eats all the Fritos!
It really does work both ways. At least she agreed to Xemasab coming to live back home, she could have said 'no'.
Cut her some slack.

[Three comments in and you get a Kewpie doll. That might be some kind of record.]

But IMO, the mother is overreacting to some very minor things; we don't expect adults to have the grownup version of a temper tantrum over something like the last of the Fritos being gone. It suggests to me that her mother has other "issues" for which the Fritos were but a vehicle. And those kinds of issues can be extremely difficult to deal with in a positive, productive manner given the parent-child dynamic. That was my point, perhaps I didn't make it very well.

[Thanks for adding the psycho to the babble.]

Why does she have to smoke in the front if you're in the back?

[Since that question falls on deaf ears, I'll presume it is because her mother is 1) not allowed to smoke around her vegan daughter, and/or 2) not allowed near her daughter when she is on the phone.]

It seems to me if you want to live with your mother, you need to accept it's her house and her rules.

[Lousy FReeper Troll!]

So you use her home. Her phone. Her Fritos. And she's a bitch?


[How dare her mother claim property rights?

This goes on for a few more posts, but the rules are only one Kewpie doll and one LFT awarded per thread. However, the tide turns:]

Your comments to XemaSab are insulting and you should apologize.

You have NO idea why she moved back home and to equate her moving back with her mom to her being a failure is beyond the pale.

You should apologize.


[I'm sorry. She obviously deserves free food, lodging and telephone, plus Internet service, a computer and a smoke-free environment, regardless of her life choices. It's not too much to ask from someone who is able to pay the bills.]

Honestly if you wanted to post a fake whiny spoiled teenager rant you wouldn't have to change one word.

[She could have used the "C" word instead of the "B" word. I think the kids these days prefer the "C" word.]

People like XemaSab and myself would have had no trouble being on our own a few decades ago. I am a college graduate and a hard worker and I still can not afford a place of my own, especially in Southern California.

[A few decades ago, like before the "Great Society" and the "War on Poverty." Yeah, that redistribution of wealth thing's kind of a bitch, ain't it?]

Hello? WTF? Is this DU?

[I mean really! Time was when DUmmies would've burned her mother in effigy.]

OMG, can we please stop being so judgmental and assigning blame here? We don't know all the facts, but we don't need to. One of our own is in a lot of pain, that's all we should need to know.

[Leave XemaSab alone! It's her life and if she wants to spend it making her mother miserable, that's her right.]

I personally know that what Xema is going through is something that has been ongoing since she was a little girl.

[That's usually where the spoiling starts.]

Move out, that will show the bitch.

[Her mother will not be able to stop crying...tears OF JOY!]

I moved in with my father...I do pay rent each month, but it is minimal ($250 a month).

[That's not rent...that's not even beer money.]

Someday that bitch will die, and you'll have to get your own place with your own fritos

[I challenge anyone to top that.]

35 Comments:

Anonymous Corona said...

We all know the ones who rushed in to defend Xena Warrior Princess are obviously typing from their own parents' basements. I'm too harsh. They may be back in their old bedrooms after all.

You're right, that last line is a beaut.

6:44 PM  
Anonymous elrond hubbard said...

XemaSab's ongoing crisis will probably wind up on "Cops" as the police respond to a domestic disturbance and find little Xema laying unconscious on the bathroom floor after overdosing on Fritos.

Whatever, let Ma smoke in the backyard, it's time to leave the nest.

8:11 PM  
Anonymous Skully said...

After my divorce I moved back in with my folks for a couple of years while I got back on my feet. I had to pay rent and 1/3 of the grocery and energy bills. I saved so much $$ when I was there. I was so grateful for them putting up with my intrusion, that after I left I paid to have a new furnace installed for them. I also got my old room back, and could eat all the fucking Fritos I wanted...cuz I paid my fair share, not mooched.

My son moved back home, and had the same attitude as our little Xema. He didn't stay very long after I told him he can make up whatever rules he wants; just pay the mortgage and the bills. He lives with fiancee at her Mom's where they mooch off her like Xema.

8:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wasn't Xema a lemony beer product with really irritating commercials? I seem to remember tolerating one once.

8:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How long before someone blames it on Bush?

10:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Liberal (n): An individual with an underdeveloped, intentionally stunted mind. See slacker, parasite, whiner, pot-smoking loser, deluded wishful thinker lacking a reference to reality.

10:54 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Here we see an example of the liberal mindset." PJ

No, it's not.

Are we really sure we want to go here? Fine. Let's hear it, you bunch of dumbasses. We'd have to start with the red-state divorce rate. Then we'd proceed down red state "Welfare Street". Damn good food while traveling, if I say so myself. Then, for the more daring, the Incest Express. And finally, the 'Blue states pay for Red state dysfunction'. Central Station.

Anon, there's been an evolutionary redefinition of "An individual with an underdeveloped, intentionally stunted mind. See slacker, parasite, whiner, pot-smoking loser, deluded wishful thinker lacking a reference to reality." If you'd included "methed out cranker", you'd have gotten it just right (excuse the pun).

12:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

troglaman if you are good at anything, you are good at poor arguments. However as I said before, I'm here to help you.

Today (or rather very early this morning) you chose to gather quite a lot of examples of unfortunate lifestyles and lump them into what you labeled 'Blue states pay for red state dysfunction'. Lets set aside for the moment the laughable notion that these people (up to and including "methed out cranker" but excluding the divorce's) would be Republican voters.

Now let's take a look at your powerful attempt to weaken your argument. When you take many bad things together and claim that if they all may happen in the same place, then that place must be bad, you are falling into the trap of the fallacy of composition.

Again lets remember that logical fallacies are many but when you start to recognize and avoid them, your arguments become easier to win. Another bonus is, fewer people laugh at you.

Later, If we have time we can tackle your assumption that the poor woman who had to move back in with her mother was divorced and not simply a failure at her chosen profession.

8:14 AM  
Anonymous John Galt said...

"Here we see an example of the liberal mindset." PJ

No, it's not. t-man


It's an example of the collectivist mindset: "...what's mine is mine and what's yours is mine too..."

Notice that "mine" applies to anyone who speaks. Since everything belongs to everyone, nothing belongs to anyone. The inevitable result is that everyone must take what they need by force.

Prime example: income tax. "Pay up or go to prison."

10:07 AM  
Anonymous John Galt said...

Another way to put it is: "If you have a sandwich and I have a gun, I have both a sandwich and a gun."

10:09 AM  
Blogger Mark said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

10:39 AM  
Blogger Son Of The Godfather said...

OK, I'm calling foul on this post. I refuse to believe there are these type of people in the world.

PJ, you don't have to post over in DUmmieland for our amusement.

That was you posting a fake rant, right?.... RIGHT?
(just lie to me so I can sleep a little better)

10:40 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous: There was a drink that came out in the early 90's called Zima.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zima

1:46 PM  
Anonymous Ray said...

Why doesn't this idiot do what most liberal girls do, find a foolish man (or woman if that's her thing), move in with them, and live off them for awhile? They don't have to work, they just have to put out.

In all seriousness, her mother should kick her out and MAKE her learn some self-reliance. It's the best thing for her, really.

1:54 PM  
Anonymous Ray said...

BTW, I hope everyone had a GREAT 4th of July! I did. I took two weeks off and went "Up North." Too bad the blood sucking mosquitoes did too, not to mention the Deer Flies.

1:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous 1:46 said:
"Anonymous: There was a drink that came out in the early 90's called Zima.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zima"

Ah. Thank you. I thought it was just a fever dream.

2:35 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Lets set aside for the moment the laughable notion that these people (up to and including "methed out cranker" but excluding the divorce's) would be Republican voters." anon

I'm not exactly sure what you mean here, anon. But I'd like NOT to exclude red state vs blue state divorces. Look it up. You should already know that you bible thumping moralists divorce more than us dirty fucking hippies. McCain? Ding! Gingrich? Ding! Red States? Ding! By the way, did I say these people getting divorces were RepubliDUms? Nope. It just happens more often in RepubliDUm states. Same is true with per capita welfare and unemployment. Who's paying for that? Draw your own conclusions.

2:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I'm not exactly sure what you mean here" -troglman

Of this I have no doubt. Try reading it again slowly. The statement includes divorces for both political persuasions but excludes lifestyles like "methed out cranker" for conservatives.

Your misunderstanding of the sentence to begin with is regretable as it is not as complicated as you perceive. However it is not surprising that you used your inability to diagram the sentence as an opportunity to attack.

Despite the fact that personal attacks also weaken your argument you also failed to learn the lesson of the fallacy of composition. Repeating a mistake over and over again will not make it true.

9:25 AM  
Anonymous John Galt said...

You should already know that you bible thumping moralists divorce more than us dirty fucking hippies. - t-man

LOL!

Not to mention that "dirty fucking hippies" just shack up rather than getting married!

Thanks for the belly-laugh trog! :)

1:02 PM  
Blogger The Gunslinger said...

Little bitch coming into my house telling me where I can smoke would find herself on the curb so fast, her Fritos would be scattered for miles.

2:49 PM  
Anonymous susieq2cute said...

Yep, JG, trog has been a barrel of laughs today, in both threads. Concerning this female libtard complaining aloud about her mother; what an ungrateful piece of liberal trash. I'd throw her out so fast, her "two-faced" head would spin.

7:09 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"I'd throw her out so fast, her "two-faced" head would spin." susie

Talk to goolsby. His firm grasp of Freudian theory might help.

2:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lol! Troglaman's thesis has been flawlessly deconstructed and he is too ignorant of the rules of logic to even know it.

Logic. Another subject the liberals have removed from schools. I wonder why? Great laughs...thanks Trog!

9:13 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Troglaman's thesis has been flawlessly deconstructed and he is too ignorant of the rules of logic to even know it." anon

What do you want? I've admitted I'm a monkey of sorts. And you're telling me I've all ready been "flawlessly deconstructed"?

No sir, mister. Go back to the compound and think about perimeter defenses or whatever it is you guys think about. Start stockpiling you dumbass.

4:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"What do you want? I've admitted I'm a monkey of sorts" -troglaman

Good for you. That's the first step. However, I hate to beat a dead horse here but when you wrote:

"Go back to the compound and think about perimeter defenses or whatever it is you guys think about. Start stockpiling you dumbass." -t

It was a description of what you believe people do who believe differenly than you, without any actual evidence that we do any such thing. This fallacy is called an 'appeal to consequences' which is a sub category of the 'irrelevant appeals fallacy'. When someone uses this in an attempt to lose the argument (as you are doing) he or she tries to persuade the listener by stating the unatractiveness of the lifestyle you chose to label us with. Sorry, with which you chose to label us. Again, without the evidence to back up the shot you took, it's just a fallacy.

Hang in there buddy! We'll get through this together.

5:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think its a disgrace when parents dont want their children back if theyre having a hard time i mean did we ask to be born no i dont think so and with the economic climate and the world being in such a state its no wonder we do have to come home. They at least lived their formative years in a time where husbands could find jobs and could buy homes on one wage. If parents complain they should have used contraception - i mean if someone threw a dog out of its home it has the rspca defending it who do we have i ask you - no one!!!! I am doing the honourable thing and not having children as i wouldnt wish this world on them and make them have to be slaves to the system or starve!!!!

7:19 PM  
Anonymous Fatboy120 said...

Logic. Another subject the liberals have removed from schools. I wonder why? Great laughs...thanks Trog!............... So you admit liberals run the country and decide what they teach in our schools? Well if thats true then it wouldent be very prudent to make fun of the liberal agenda, get some perspectve asshole.

9:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I dont know whats more pathetic, this hypocritical website, or the people posting on it.

9:06 PM  
Anonymous Ridiculous Business said...

Guy who is arguing with Troglador, you are a giant arrogant ass. Is your opinion so much more important that your point of view must be asserted by pointing out the flaws in someone else's?

1:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is pretty retarded I don't care!You deal with your life we don't really want to hear about it!

2:46 PM  
Anonymous mini said...

what the fuck does this shit have to do with being liberal? you're an idiot and your "book" is a joke. just run around and blame everything on "liberals" because it's the easiest way to get the attention off what an asswipe you are.

let go of the politics thing and i'm willing to bet that you're a selfish, lonely, bored human who lives a mindless existence.

2:25 PM  
Blogger TheDannyFan said...

i'm pretty yung (10yearsold) when i got a math question wrong she just starts cussing like a tried to kill her! WTF is her deal!!!
she even chaged the password on my school account so now i can't even get in to do my figgen homework!!!

1:28 PM  
Anonymous Isa said...

Dude, who the hell are you to judge a person off the internet?
Anyways, if she's eating mac & cheese she's not vegan, obs.

9:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow. easily one of the dumbest things I have ever read. Like liberals are the only people out there who have ever acted like spoiled bitches. You are so unbelievably ignorant if you think character flaws belong to only one party or one political mindset. The problem with this country is that most of the people in it, liberal or conservative, need to GROW THE F*** UP, and realize the irrational name calling on either side or assumption that everyone who doesn't think like you is an idiot, is insane & completely useless.

12:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My moms a bitch. dont need to check twice. she always fucks up. and ruins my life. my mother is screwing arond.

she looks at you when yer bathing. she bitchs about he cheetos everyday. she knows if youve been having sex cuz she borrows yer condoms n e way hey!

sing to the tune of santa clause is coming totown.

1:41 AM  

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