Saturday, November 10, 2007

"Lions For Lambs" Gets Rotten Tomatoes Reviews


Yes, another in a long line of leftwing propaganda movies attacking the EVIL Bush Regime has come out. And it is also another FLOP as you can see in these scathing reviews of "Lions For Lambs" over at ROTTEN TOMATOES. Watching the trailer below, I don't know what creeped me out more: Robert Redford's scary face or the idea of Tom Cruise as a U.S. Senator. So let us now watch the scorching reviews of this tedious propaganda flick in Rotten Tomato Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting this flick went in like a Lion and OUT like a Lamb, is in the [brackets]:


"Lions for Lambs simply isn't fresh or courageous enough to make an impact let alone a difference." ---IGN Movies


[Or make a profit at the Box Office.]


"Everyone sits and pontificates. It's one long speech. Too many words." ---FilmsInReview.Com


[And too much of Redford's very scary face.]


"Lame exercise in proscenium dialectics." ---Financial Times


[A pain in the proscenium.]


"Might be a useful tool for stimulating discussion in a high school classroom, as long as the class is studying civics and not cinema." ---Commercial Appeal


[Translation: The movie itself sucks.]


"Rather than reasoned thought and debate, the only thing this movie inspires is exasperation." ---Las Vegas Weekly


[Exasperation that you wasted money and time on this piece of tedium.]


"Pure fence-sitting liberal agony is all that's on offer here, in a muddled and pompous film about America's war on terror." ---Guardian (UK)


[Muddled and pompous? Was Pied Piper Pitt the screenwriter?]



"I had the inescapable feeling that this film ought to come with a warning that it has a lot in common with a NASA wind tunnel." ---Cinema Signals


[Or an Oval Office Monica.]


"It's the role of an artist to not just comment on current events, but also to shape that commentary into a dramatic form that'll excite, move and inspire people. Lions for Lambs isn't filmmaking; it's list-making." ---Philadelphia Weekly


[Put me down on the long list for no-shows.]


"Robert Redford's smug, self-satisfied liberal weltschmerz anthem." ---Film Freak Central


[Oh Say Can You Weltschmerz!]


"...its obvious, liberal message stamp[s] it little more than a Public Service Announcement. I'm Robert Redford and I approve this message." ---Reeling Reviews

[I'm Li'l Beaver and I DISAPPROVE this message.]


"Redford and Carnahan would like us to ponder our role in their fate. And maybe we would, if the lecture weren't so dull and self-satisfied." ---Los Angeles Times


[Straight to DVD and straight to sleep.]


"The movie is a talkathon with a certain amount of military action. It could be presented about as well as a radio play." ---Roger Ebert


[A BORING radio play.]


"Robert Redford's first helming chore in seven years, and his most directly political pic yet, amounts to a giant cry of "Americans, get engaged!" wrapped in a star-heavy discourse that uses a lot of words to say nothing new." ---Variety


[Thanx for that Snooze Alert.]


"Robert Redford (who also directed), Tom Cruise and Meryl Streep might just as well have appeared on-screen for a couple of minutes with signs that said, 'War is bad,' and been done with it. Saves everyone the cost of a ticket." ---Arizona Republic


[I've already saved that particular expense.]


"The film doesn't so much end as just stop. We're left thinking less about what we've heard than about what we haven't seen -- a satisfying movie." ---Detroit Free Press


[STOP the movie, I'm getting off!]


"It's missing the movie part of being a movie. And so it sort of just sits there talking." ---Detroit News


[Yakety-yak! Don't come back!]


"It does not feel good to report that a movie with Robert Redford, Meryl Streep, and Tom Cruise makes the eyelids droop. But that's what Lions for Lambs does." ---Boston Globe


[ZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz....]


"What we have here isn't a drama so much as a dramatized position paper in three parts." ---Newsday


[Not exactly a chick flick.]


"Talky, didactic and essentially free of any real narrative..." ---Oregonian


[Like trying to have a conversation with Pied Piper Pitt.]


"Lions for Lambs is insightful and provocative." ---Sacramento Bee


[I hope they at least gave you free popcorn for that.]


27 Comments:

Anonymous at all costs said...

Where are all the poll numbers now? I though 'real americans' want the war over - then why isn't this movie a success? Americans are starting to recognize Hollywood for the treacherous scum that they are. We see what's happening in Europe - we're not going to let Hollyweird bring that here.

8:45 AM  
Blogger The Gunslinger said...

I can't believe the Sacramento Bee didn't describe it as "Speaking Truth To Power."

Which is what a Leftie newspaper like the Bee usually calls the repetition of tired Leftie positions to a Leftie convocation who already completely agrees with them...like the California State Government.

In Northern California, we call the Bee "Pravda"...not original, but accurate.

I'll give them one thing. They're consistent.

10:16 AM  
Anonymous Ray said...

""Talky, didactic and essentially free of any real narrative..."

Redford should have named the movie:

Dialog for DUmmies

Now showing at a moonbat theater near you.

10:17 AM  
Blogger Bilgeman said...

Wow...this the MSM's pet movie critics speaking?

It must suck beyond all understanding.

One wonders that if Redford isn't capable of crafting a weltschmerz, perhaps the Republican National Committee should turn its' hand to cinema.

Turnabout is fair play.

10:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not a movie follower in general, I wonder what other recent antiwar-libtalk- "Lame exercise in proscenium dialectics" movies have been hatched only to hit the wall..

Anyone keeping score?

12:04 PM  
Anonymous dittohed said...

im not going to see this movie becuz robert redmond is ugly and that merle strip cant act and tom cruise jumps on the couches and thats funny but not funny like p.j. and his funnie beaver who makes the funnie jokes and besides the movie doesnt have any pirates and explosions and cartoons i like cartoons shreck should have been in this one then it would have been good and if someone makes a bad movie about something then the thing they made it about is bad like how they made the pearl harbor movie and it was bad even though it had explosions (but no pirates) and that meant that world war 2 was bad im sure thats what pj means!

12:39 PM  
Anonymous at all costs said...

Dittohed - that must be an example of liberal 'humor' that I'm hearing so much about. All you liberals do is hate. Hate isn't funny.

2:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nah!D-Hed is just very, very young. Immature. Perhaps even of the "Special" community. You know. Wears hockey gear all the time and not on a team?

Incapable of learning capitalization or punctuation, he/she needs someone to talk to.

4:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

PeeZhay,

Manger moi, petit castor!

4:27 PM  
Anonymous Ray said...

" Anonymous said...
PeeZhay,

Manger moi, petit castor!"


Quand grandirez-vous?

4:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Monsieur Raymond Severe Envie du Penis, Esq.,

Manger moi.

5:08 PM  
Anonymous john f not kerry said...

It should be mangez, or mange. At least I learned something in 4 years of high school French. Verb conjugation.

5:28 PM  
Anonymous john f not kerry said...

"The movie is a talkathon with a certain amount of military action. It could be presented about as well as a radio play." ---Roger Ebert

There's some red on red action.

5:30 PM  
Anonymous Ted said...

This blog reminds me of that fake TV show "Cookie Party" on the Sarah Silverman show. The "Half-Hour News Hour" was funnier than this silliness.

6:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

At least "Showgirls" had nudity...

7:46 PM  
Anonymous dittohed said...

your right at all costs hate isnt funny rudy gullani told me so when he told pat robinson he didn't want his endorsement becuz pat hates america and thought 9/11 was our fault when it was really saddam who did it and he didnt need a preacher who hates people to say hed be a good president also pj shows hate is bad by making funnie jokes about people all the time and by making the cancer guys friends sad lol

11:26 PM  
Anonymous Mikey NTH said...

P.J.! You have hit the big time! You have your own pet trolls!

Pop some bubbly and relax, you've earned it.

1:06 PM  
Anonymous kayinmaine said...

So the corporate fascists who control all the papers, and all the media spread their Goebbels popaganda through the "movie reviewers". And that's supposed to be surprising?

President Kucinich will have all the fascists and racists killed! THEN America will be the enlightened country it should be!

1:30 PM  
Blogger Dave said...

Wasn't there a quote about a writer somewhere (from Groucho maybe) that "he can compress fewer ideas into more words than anyone I've ever seen."? Sounds like this movie. Maybe it could be marketed as an insomnia cure.

And I find the amazing thing about trolls is the horribly quotidian nature of their constant responses. Not an ounce of creative thought to be seen.

2:58 PM  
Anonymous dittohed said...

i agree dave i think crative and orginal thought is like quoting groucho max insted of saying something on my own and your the most cretive of them all except pj of course with the funnie beaver who should really have babies with mallard filmore who is a funny duck and crative and orignal too!

5:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

mullah cimoc say ameriki need google: mighty wurltizer +cia

then to asking why usa control media try to suppress attendance of anti war movie. A: so the other creator persons not to make the anti war movie too.

this all part of mighty wurlitzer operation. now so sad to see ameriki, him woman the lesbian hate the man, him daughter the slut take the LBT (low back tattoo)and him son the gay homosexual of aid sick.

6:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Pure fence-sitting liberal agony is all that's on offer here, in a muddled and pompous film about America's war on terror." ---Guardian (UK)

Games, set, match. When the Guardian calls a pic like this trash, you can take it to the bank.

For those unfamiliar with the Guardian, it is a leftest UK daily, and actually quit good - worth reading on their website.

The term "moonbat" comes from the name of a Guardian columnist, George Monbiot.

10:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"President Kucinich will have all the fascists and racists killed! THEN America will be the enlightened country it should be!"

I'm not sure if that was serious or not, but either way it's hilarious for so many reasons.

11:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Based on a few of the responses on this topic (You all know which ones I'm talking about) It seems one of the downsides to all the publicity DUmmie FUnnies gained from the Weblog Awards is that now there are even more obnoxious, brain- dead trolls to pollute this blog with their repetitive talking points, mind- numbingly lame attempts at humor and sarcasm, and seriously over- used insults that are flung around on DU 12 times a day.
"Not a movie follower in general, I wonder what other recent antiwar-libtalk- "Lame exercise in proscenium dialectics" movies have been hatched only to hit the wall..
Anyone keeping score?"
There was 'Rendition,' of course. Preachy garbage which I won't waste my time seeing (I couldn't get past the scene in the trailer where Reese Witherspoon's character shrilly howls "JUSTTELLMEHE'SALLRIIIIGHT!", in a nauseating display of over- acting, there's no way I could put up with two hours of that without my IQ dropping at least). Fortunately, it bombed miserably, and was beaten in the box office on its opening weekend by the 3-D rerelease of a MUCH cooler, more entertaining, and generally better film from 1993, 'The Nightmare Before Christmas.'
Maybe as they start losing more and more money on these pretentious stinkers, the Hollyweird executives will finally start getting that the majority of the American people are getting sick of these liberal propaganda films.

2:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oops, in that last post when I was talking about 'Rendition,' I meant to say that "...there's no way I could put up with two hours of that without my IQ dropping at least 10 points." Sorry.

2:24 PM  
Blogger The Gunslinger said...

I wonder, would the Lefties commenting here use actual English with normal spelling and some semblance of punctuation?

Your posts are impenetrable...I assume that's why I'm missing the humor in your ripostes.

9:02 PM  
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