Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Recent DUmmie Poly Sci Graduate Can't Find Job

About the only thing more useless than a degree in Political Science is a degree in Philosophy. The cold fact of reality is that there isn't exactly a plethora of jobs waiting out there for someone with a B.A. in either Poly Sci or Philosophy. No employer is going to place an ad in a newspaper to hire a new Poly Sci graduate for 20 bucks an hour to ply his trade in political science. About the only thing you can do with a B.A. in Poly Sci is stay in school for your Master's degree and hope you get a job teaching Poly Sci (or related field) or hope that you minored in something PRACTICAL like business and work in that field. Only a complete IDIOT would be surprised that there are NO jobs waiting out there in the real world for someone with a mere B.A. in Poly Sci. And yet this is exactly what DUmmie Superman Returns expected as you can see in his sad THREAD titled, "I'm a recent college graduate who is lost." So let us now watch DUmmie Superman Returns get slapped in the face with cold economic reality in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if there are any philosopher factory jobs available, is in the [brackets]:

I'm a recent college graduate who is lost.

[Somehow this conjures up a parody version of Amazing Grace: "I once was lost but still not found..." Perhaps that famous Tin Pan Alley Songmeister, Charles Henrickson, could fill in the rest of the Amazing DUmmie song parody.]

I am a 21 year old who recently graduated from college, with a degree in political science. I got good grades and graduated magna cum laude. You would think the world is open to me, but it's not. I made several mistakes towards the end of my college career. I did not investigate graduate and/or law schools good enough. By the time I got aroud to it the deadlines to apply had already passed. Yet the reason I didn't choose to seriously examine my future education was because I had no idea what I wanted to do for the rest of my life, what field to pursue? Love the field, but have no idea what I want to do in it. Plus, I am already in debt from my college loans. I couldn't really afford it.

[So you admit you were totally clueless and now you want an employer to hire you in a field for which there is ZERO demand?]

I've been interested in politics, history, current affairs since the 2000 election. Yet, I feel detached from the process. I live in New Jersey, and I feel most politicians, regardless of party are just assholes and generally corrupt. Well, I was willing to put that behind me and suck it up if I have to. But here's the glitch, I don't have a car. And I live by the jersey shore, an area with a lack of reliable public transportation. I've put my resume online and have tried to look around for any political jobs close by, either for a politican or some organization. No luck, especially when I know that if it's for a campaign or a grassroots organization, I may need to drive around. I need a job. I need the money. I look in the classifieds and none of the jobs apply to my strengths. I didn't go to school for marketing or accounting. If I have to get a job at some supermarket I will, but after four years of college and good grades, I don't want to have to work with high school kids on summer jobs, no offense. I'm starting to feel this degree in political science was useless.

[Let me know if you get a job at Publix or Winn Dixie. I always wanted a Poly Sci grad as a bag boy.]

anyone have similar issues? anyone get good grades in college, graduate, and then are just unprepared for the real world? any suggestions?

[I have a suggestion. You need to get a mentor such as William Rivers Pitt who has a lot of pull in the political world right now. Why I bet he could even get you a job as press secretary for Dennis Kucinich. And now to hear more similar tales of woe from other DUmmies...]

You have to figure out what your passion is with regard to politics. Then follow that interest. Check out your university, maintain connections with your prof's and prepare to hussle. No job will come to you. Nothing wrong with a grocery job if it pays to get you where you want to go.

[I could have sworn I heard my bag boy whisper "Impeach Bush!" the other day but maybe I was just imagining it.]

Unless you're in a more vocational area such as accounting or nursing where you must receive specific training and education to enter that particular profession the degree you have is irrelevant to gaining employment. And personally, going straight to grad school to avoid the cold cruel world is a cop-out. You have other interests in life. Explore them for possible career paths. But getting a job, no matter how low level it is will give you an education about the world not found in any textbook.

[You should have gotten a more practical degree such as one in Philosophy. The classified ads are chock full of employers seeking out philosophers.]

I'm entering my Sophomore Year of college, hoping I won't be in your situation when I graduate. But somewhat worried that I might. I don't intend to go to grad school right away because I'm not entirely sure what graduate program I want to do. My plan for when I graduate is to look for whatever politically related job I can find, just as an entry point and then working my way up the latter. With politics especially, I think it's a lot more about who you know than about what you know.

[Good news! Mike Gravel is looking for a campaign manager. No pay and you need to have the ability to toss a large rock into a pond.]

I'm fairly sure that I would like to go into foreign policy, which I was I'm thinking about taking Arabic, but I'm not entirely sure. If you look at most successful political figures, many of them have held positions in several different areas.

[Just check out the Help Wanted---Foreign Policy section of the classifieds. It's chock full of jobs for you.]

You make me feel worse now. It's only been a few weeks.I was also interested in foreign policy and still am. My biggest mistake was not taking a second language. You really should take that Arabic class. You'll be absolute gold to any government agency.

[Yeah, just one class in Arabic and you will be absolutely FLUENT in a language with little resemblance to English.]

Basically if I'm serious about learning Arabic, it will take most if not all of my elective credits and that second major in economics I was thinking about is either going to become a minor or cease to exist.

[Oh come on! Learning Arabic, which is in a completely different language group than English, is a SNAP!]

actually when Corzine was running for Governor I went canvassing. He payed 10 dollars an hour so I'd love for him to do that again. haha. I also had to do an internship as a requirment for my political science degree. I ended up working for a pretty powerful Congressman in New York. I should go back there for a job, but when I was intern, all they did was give me busy work.

[If you get an intern job with the Edwards campaign, you will be given the important assignment of buying a PlayStation 3 on the sly at Wal-Mart.]

It can be really hard and I struggled for years. I still struggle today, in fact (I'm 37). I found a career I like pretty well but I'm stuck in a dead-end job. I think part of me is still waiting for someone to discover how talented I am and whisk me away from all this (yes, I know how dillusional that sounds).

["Dillusional?" No. Of course Prince Charming will magically appear and whisk you away from the hell hole that is your life.]

I went for my Master's immediately after college and all it really left me was massively in debt and two years behind on my career. It was fun and all but it was really just a way for me to stay in my comfort zone: school. If I could go back I would've done it differently.

[You would have done it differently by staying in your other comfort zone: Mommy's basement.]

I have some bad advice for you.. Go f*ck around for a few years while you are young, get a shitty job, have roommates, party, and save up some money for a long vacation in another country. It helps put things in perspective.

[Or live in an tiny Boston tenement room and get senselessly drunk every night at Bukowski's.]

Hey SMR, I heard on a podcast from Lonely Planet the other day, there is an organization in the UK called Twin Trek (sp?) where you can teach English and live with a host family. Maybe you might want to check that out?

[Teaching English to the English. Now there is an incredibly practical job!]

I'm 33. Have a BS in zoology and an MS in entomology. What do I do? Unemployed with no idea what to do next or what I would even want to do next.

[Start with applying for a job as a bouncer at Bukowski's. The only downside to the job is having to listen to longwinded political lectures about the Third American Empire from one of its drunken patrons. However, if you act like a clueless Lenny from Of Mice And Men, you'll get by.]

I graduated May 21st w/ degrees in biology and english from a pretty prestigious school (not trying to brag). I moved to Salt Lake City, UT to be with my now fiance...I wanted to start teaching science right away, but I'm so frustrated by the lack of help and resources available to prospective teachers...The department of education's web site is about as useful as a hole in the head, and I cannot find anyone who is willing to sit down with me and talk about my options. Now I'm working at Starbucks--it's an ok gig for a few months I think, but im so terribly frustrated that I haven't found a "real" job yet...I'm not getting interviews for any of the biotech positions either. have you had any luck getting interviews? Coz I haven't. I feel like such a goddamn loser sometimes that I cry.

[Please don't cry into my latte.]

Count me in your sad club. I got a M.A. in something very specific (speech pathology), and after only a few years I realized that I don't want to be a speech path anymore. But I don't know where my career should be going from here...I'm kind of lost, too.

[If this were a movie, we would now be hearing the Amazing DUmmie theme tune in the background.]

f*ck around in working class areas all across the globe
or in the US (it's cheaper to live in ghettoes). get drunk. get into some fights, get arrested.

[Al Gore III just took your advice.]

Don't rule out jobs, such as Congressional or think tank staffer that take you to a larger city. As you know as a New Jerseyite, you can live without a car in New York or Boston, and in other cities, such as Chicago, San Francisco, and Portland as well. Don't worry too much about the pay, as their will be lots of other twentysomethings in your situation with whom you can share delapidated apartments.

[Yeah, TONS of jobs in the classifieds for think tank staffers.]

I want to say one word to you. Just one word.
Are you listening?


[Pied Piper Pitt has one word to say to you. Just one word. Are you listening? ....Plastered.]


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I did not investigate graduate and/or law schools good enough

"good enough"?
"GOOD enough"??

I know you WELL ENOUGH simply by your grammar, DUmbass slacker.

9:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, as I recall we right-wingers were the ones with no modern technology skills.

Damn, what am I gonna do with my MS in IT?

:-) I shoulda studied "liberal" arts.

9:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, I got into Arts myself, but I KNEW in advance that I had to be prepared to work low-level jobs until I could finally find work in my field . (Or in my case, make my own work...comic art's not bad, but don't expect to get rich off it) In some fields such as arts, there's an unspoken disclaimer that you only get into it if you feel it's your life's calling, (for me, art really is a calling) because you will NOT find employment easily.

But I suppose telling these idiots about the concept of decent, temporary jobs such as substitute teaching wouldn't be such a good idea. I certainly wouldn't want anyone who posts at DU anywhere near my kids. (If I had them, anyway)

12:53 AM  
Anonymous ray said...

"I cannot find anyone who is willing to sit down with me and talk about my options."

Try talking with your local military recruiter. The military employs civilians too, ya know.

If you are unable to even LOOK at a recruiting station, and I suspect you would rather blow one up as soon as enter it, then you still need not worry as the world needs ditch diggers too. With your high cost education from a "prestigious" school as your guide, I am sure you'll catch on to what part of the shovel is the working end in only three or four weeks.

11:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I cannot find anyone who is willing to sit down with me and talk about my options."

Well Ray, I think euthanasia is an option for the DUmmie.

2:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'll bet he can get euthanized at Bukowski's!


6:13 PM  
Blogger Son Of The Godfather said...

If you're referring to Pitt, I understand he prefers to get "youth"anized.

9:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

SoG -- Heh.


10:52 AM  
Blogger Dave said...

Oh. My. God. These idiots are even more clueless than I ever believed. "Who's going to hold my hand and find me a job I like without any effort on my part? Why isn't anyone taking care of me?"

I teach polisci undergrads, and I teach them that there are darned few jobs in electoral politics, but there are more in other politicial areas *IF* they prepare by getting the tools (stat, for instance) and intern and volunteer before the graduate.

Among the students I have advised I have some working for US Senators and Reps, in various federal govt agencies, a couple of state senators, many working in municipal government, or county government. And I teach at a mid-level state university.

Also, a good polisci major is very akin to the old, true Liberal Arts degree. You should have learned how to take general direction, find something specific, boil it down to the main points, and present the results in an understandable way to others. These are valuable skills in many businesses, not that I expect any DUmmies to want a job in business.

Clueless idiots. Gah!

6:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I recall when my son was getting his BA in Japanese Studies from he U of Alaska. I thought he was nuts. But he did a 4 year AF stint (where he got an AA in Korean) after that and is now heading off to law school in a few weeks (Int. Buss. Law). So it worked outI asked him the other day. "What? You don't want to be a fighting young storefront lawyer defending crackeads and hookers and living in a 3rd floor walkup?" He said: "Naw, I'd rather eat regularly" LOL

1:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

since i'm in the same position i don't think this page is that funny.

2:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have a JD and and MBA and dont think this page is that funny. What were the social engineers thinking, when they dreamt up of the idea that everyone should go to college and spend alot of time and a ton of money studying useless things that employers have no interest in. Why do we even have these degrees if there are no jobs. When people spend money and go into debt to go to publicly funded universities there should be an expectation that what is offered is valuable and useful to the business world and that there is a market for what they spent years of their life and tons of money doing?

Where are the placement departments at these fine educational institutions? Why are we offering degrees for which there are no employment prospects. Maybe we ought to be asking why there arent any better jobs out there.

This is a bigger issue this day and and age than it is being made out to be here, and it is not a joke. It is entirely political in nature, and the state of affairs in this country, with the rising cost of education and continually diminishing opportunities for the middle eventually going to come to a head.

No young smart kid in this country should EVER be without a good graduates shouldnt be diggin ditchs or mowin lawns, and colleges ought to help their students find relevant placement. And that's just for starters!

5:06 PM  
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