Monday, June 18, 2007

DUmmie Offended By National Anthem

Oh the horror! The absolute HORROR! Come with me and watch this tale of woe as a poor widdle DUmmie had his sacred virginal ears exposed to the (GASP!) national anthem. You can read all about this violation of his human rights in this DUmmie THREAD. So, DUmmie, can we NOW question your patriotism? Let us now watch the DUmmie writh in agony at this exposure to the national anthem in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, never before realizing what a fascist Francis Scott Key was, is in the [brackets]:

Was at the car place getting the car serviced, and all of a sudden, the P.A. system broke into a flag saluting bloisterous voice of the National Anthem. I couldn't avoid it any place on the premises, as I was already outside sitting on the curb. Felt like I was in some natzi camp getting ready for the showers. Needless to say, I voiced my opinion on the matter to the management. Told them that I was not at a sporting event, funeral, union meeting, blah blah and asked him when Wagner was scheduled. Told them that the National Anthem blasting at the car dealership was nationalistic and a bit over the top and creepy. What do you think?

[I think you have a strong case for the Hague against that car place for causing a crime against humanity by subjecting your progressive ears to the national anthem.]

We are headed down the slippery slope. I have a feeling that in the coming years, Americans are going to wish they had paid closer attention in History.

[First you hear the national anthem in public and the next thing you know you are forcibly marched into a Wal-Mart detention center. It is indeed a slippery slope.]

I'm with Luis Bunuel: I don't even want to hear it at sporting events. Of course some people would say that this makes me unpatriotic. To which I would reply: bullshit, it just makes me nonjingoistic and nonnationalistic.

[It makes you a nonrational DUmmie like Luis Bunuel.]

I could do without it there too, but then I don't go to sporting events, so I don't have to be bothered with that.

[Good news! Bukowski's doesn't play the national anthem at drinking events.]

Is Houston the only place that has replaced "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" with "God Bless America" (at least the last time I was at a game)? I was floored. I wouldn't stand, as it is not our national anthem. My husband was afraid I was going to get lynched.

[How about if we play the DUmmie anthem... "They're Coming To Take Me Away!"]

I share your creep-itude. I wish more people truly understood the difference between patriotism and nationalism. Or jingoism.

[USA! USA! USA! Thus began the Third American Empire.

Was this a national/regional chain, or a private garage? That would have given me the creeps, too. Good for you for speaking out.

[So you got the creeps every day in school when they played the national anthem?]

I'll bet you're not the only one who didn't like being assaulted by the loud music. Anybody trying to have a conversation or who was making a phone call would be annoyed, I would think.

[FUnnie how you complain about the national anthem but not about loud rap music full of N-words and F-words. That stuff assaults my ears almost daily.]

Smart business people stay out of politics...

[Only a DUmmie could see playing the national anthem as being politically partisan.]

I don't think you should have voiced your complaint. They probably just think you're a jerk, now.

[Along with the thousands of DUFU readers who think the same thing.]

It wasn't a car wash on a military base, was it?
You get treated to the tune twice a day, when the flag goes up, and when it comes down--they DO give you a warning, though, so you can run for cover and not get stuck standing and saluting in a parking lot halfway to your car....

[WARNING! WARNING! Your liberal ears are about to be subjected to the national anthem! All DUmmies are advised to enter protective shelters until the cessation of this song!]

I'm tired of war-mongering, and that song is a celebration of a moment in war.

[It celebrates the moment when the war-mongering fascists in Ft. McHenry withstood a British bombardment.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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Anonymous Celtjew said...

If it's just the tune that's playing, it's really simple. Sing (or at least think) the lyrics to the drinking song the tune was borrowed from, "Anacreon in Heaven."

To Anacreon in Heaven, where he sat in full glee,
A few sons of harmony made a petition
That he their inspirer and patron should be,
When the answer came back from the crusty old Grecian:
"Voice, fiddle, and flute no longer be mute!
I'll lend you my name and inspire you to boot
And likewise I will teach you, like me, to entwine
The Myrtle of Venus with Bacchus's vine."

Of course that would involve knowing literature that wasn't post-modern, never mind not post-post-modern, so it might not be a viable solution either.

6:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Unbelievable, simply unbelievable. Nationalisim is a bad thing eh? Especially when it's the US of A... I just don't get it. Why do these people hate their own country so much??

9:45 AM  
Blogger Son Of The Godfather said...

That our own national anthem sends these peons scurrying like the cockroaches they are speaks volumes. I wouldn't make a very good business owner, I guess... If I played the anthem and someone came in to actually complain???... Without reservation, I would tell them to f*** off and leave the area immediately.

What the hell is wrong with these idiots?

9:47 AM  
Anonymous ray said...

"It wasn't a car wash on a military base, was it?
You get treated to the tune twice a day, when the flag goes up, and when it comes down--they DO give you a warning, though, so you can run for cover and not get stuck standing and saluting in a parking lot halfway to your car"

Hay DUmmie, a civilian or military salute, along with stopping your car and standing at attention when the Flag is being raised or lowered and/or the National Anthem is being played is given as a sign of respect for this country and the lives lost in her defense. Also, Reveille is sounded for the raising and Retreat is sounded for the lowering of the Flag (followed by the National Anthem). I guess that is what the DUmmie is referring to as "a warning". I was in the Army and volunteered for Flag Detail for a year so I know what I'm talking about. Apparently you never actually attended a Flag Ceremony as you have little understanding as to what that entails.

BTW, any military personnel who "runs for cover" when the flag is being raised or lowered, or when the National Anthem is being played, is in violation of the UCMJ and should be charged and prosecuted. I think similar charges should be brought on the civilians that "dis" the flag and those who fight and die to protect America and all she represents.

"I'm tired of war-mongering, and that song is a celebration of a moment in war."

I guess this DUmmie wishes we were still a part of the British Empire. Guess what DUmmies, we kicked the brit's collective ass (and saved them twice from total annihilation, remember WWI and WWII?)! Tee Hee

10:41 AM  
Anonymous Basilisk said...

And somehow, I doubt any of these mental toddlers would label playing, for example, the Venezuelan national anthem as "jingoistic" and "war-mongering". No, that would magically become be a proud, patriotic celebration of culture.

I swear...stupidity should hurt.

10:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Why do these people hate their own country so much?? "

They hate their country because of "Daddy issues". They want "mommy" to feed them, burp them, and take care of all their needs. "Daddy", on the other hand, makes them get jobs, feed themselves, and frowns at them when they do bad things.

10:50 AM  
Anonymous true patriot said...

Bravo to this brave patriot!

The fascist war-mongering "National Anthem" is a Hate Crime!

12:41 PM  
Anonymous john f not kerry said...

True Patriot,

You can stop the act. We know who you are.

1:43 PM  
Anonymous john f not kerry said...


Their stupidity does!

1:45 PM  
Anonymous ray said...

The DUmmie Anthem

Oh-ohh say can you see,
Just how stupid I am?
I think that it’s cool,
To berate all America.

I belittle and curse,
Everything that I hear,
Which venerates God,
And American values.

And I scream it’s not right,
That Americans fight,
For the freedoms we have
And secure for our children.

I will never be true,
To the Red, White, and Blue.
Forever I’ll hate,
The American sprit.

Oh spare us that Star Spangled Banner,
Take it away.
For it’s tyranny I love,
As long as I get my way.

2:34 PM  
Blogger Fox Slater said...

"I'm tired of war-mongering, and that song is a celebration of a moment in war."

I seriously suggest we start publicly playing "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" now.

3:46 PM  
Blogger Dave said...

I suggest these sensitive souls move to some other country more in tune with their beliefs. Cuba, maybe?

9:40 PM  

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