Wednesday, July 04, 2012

More panic: "Obama Team had better get on Ellen, Letterman, Leno and FAST"

The panic button is still depressed, and so are the DUmmies. They know the Affordable Tax Act (AFF-TAX!) will be a tough sell in November, so they want to be pro-Active and get people on board with it NOW. Thus this THREAD, "Obama Team had better get on Ellen, Letterman, Leno and FAST." Sell it to the brain-dead, celebrity-obsessed, idiot-box set--in other words, the Democrat base. Yeah, that's the ticket!

So let us now enter the DUmmieland Panic Room, where they're trying to figure out how to sell a sow's ear as a silk purse, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, doing DUbble-DUFU DUty on this day dedicated to freedom from oppressive, over-taxing government, is in the [brackets]:

Obama Team had better get on Ellen, Letterman, Leno and FAST

[Get on Ellen lickety-split!]

Rant Alert

[EVERY thread in DUmmieland should come with a Rant Alert. But thanks for warning us, DUmmie Laura PourMeADrink.]

Hate to sound like my pants are on fire, but they are on fire.

[Stop, drop, and rant!]

the propaganda machine on the right. . . . They are scaring people, just average folks, who are now
thinking they

(1) will lose their insurance
(2) their premiums will skyrocket

(3) that they will lose their doctor
(4) that their taxes will go up.


[Just because one or more of those things will almost certainly happen to most people . . . well, just don't THINK about it, people! If you don't think about it, it isn't real! Block it out of your mind and you'll feel a whole lot better! . . . Refocus, re-center. . . . Cleansing breath. . . . Ommm. . . . See? It's not so scary!]

I saw Sanjay Gupta interviewing people. . . .

[Glad to hear he got a job after American Idol.]

who were asking "Will I still have my insurance?"

[Of course you will! Sure, the premiums will be twice as high. And when your employer goes out of business--OK, well maybe THEN you won't have insurance. But the tax won't be THAT high. And if you get REALLY poor, there's always Medicaid. So look, it's all good!]

Seniors rating of Obama drop 3 points since the Thursday.

[Isn't a bounce supposed to go UP?]

the Obama Team needs to get a plan on how to stop this. Think outside the box.

[Resign?]

They need to come up with 5 simple, important points and get every single surogate to repeat over and over.

[1. Barack is a nice guy. He has daughters. He has a dog.
2. You can have dinner with him. Enter the contest. We'll cover the airfare.
3. Rethuglicans are rich and mean-spirited and want to throw Granny over a cliff.
4. Michelle. Isn't she lovely?
5. FREE BIRTH-CONTROL! FREE HEALTHCARE! FREE STUDENT LOANS! FREE MORTGAGES! FREE! IT'S ALL FREE! WHEEEEEE!!!!]

They need to get on every single talk show. . . . Spend some big bucks on ads. Advertise a website, a toll free info line...Something. Obama should do a night time address. . . . before it's too late.
[Or launch some programming of their own: "America's Next Top Tax Rate." "What Not to Earn." "DNC-ing With The Stars." "How I Death-Paneled Your Mother."]

Phew. Thanks for reading my rant.

[Phew. You're welcome, DUmmie Laura PourMeADrink. But wait, you're not done . . .]

And IMHO, they've got to get on the 8th grade level. . . .

[No, sorry, Laura, that would be over the head of most Democrat voters.]

If you have insurance, nothing will change. . . .

["Nothing has changed in Austria." Thank you, Herr Zeller. . . . OK, Laura, NOW we go to your fellow DUmmies . . .]

They need to kick it into high gear now!

And they need to kick some MSM ass. . . .

[And the old people need to kick the bucket.]

Obama could get on any talk show he wants, Michelle too.

[Michelle could do push-ups on Ellen. No, wait, let me rephrase that. . . .]

what about PSAs?

[I don't think she could catch one that way.]

A PSA would be brilliant, but can they play them this close to an election? I don't know if the election rules would allow it.

[Rules, shmules! Go for it!]

Do it. Do it. Do it!

[DU it. DU it. DU it!]

Ellen's on summer break.

[Shows how well her show is doing, no one noticed.]

I didn't know she was still on TV.

[It's Must-Not-See TV.]

Perfect Spokesman

[DUmmie shows photo of Alan Alda.]

It's the half of America that usually stays home we need to convince. . . . They don't know SQUAT about ANYTHING but they know Alan Alda and know he played a doctor on a show they liked so they won't flip the channel right away. And YES. If possible, put him in character as Hawkeye Pierce home from war in private practice in Crabapple Cove, Maine and have other surviving members from MASH appear too. Wouldn't it be great to hear him call in his wife and it turns out to be Hotlips?

[Or better yet, B.J.]

Most of the people who remember MASH are almost eligible for Medicare.

[Alan Olda.]

I haven't watched TV in a decade so I don't know what's considered to be a current doctor show. And no,...Dr. Who is from England and he's not really a doctor.

[Here's a clue: Those actors who play doctors on TV? They're not really doctors, either.]

I don't watch TV hospital dramas either. There's one that takes place in Seattle--is it Gray's Anatomy?-- that is popular, with Sandra Oh...and there's Showtime's Nurse Jackie (but that is a dramady, and not suitable for this effort). . . .

["Nurse Jackie"--I haven't seen the show, but isn't she the one who is repeatedly violating the nursing code of ethics? Sounds perfect for Obamacare! You know, dealing with those expensive patients who are driving up the costs. . . .]

Tom Hanks would do it. So would Kevin Spacey.

[Have Will Pitt work on Spacey. He met him at a bar once, you know.]


How about Al Franken?

[Of course! The man who made Air America what it is today!]

If Sebelius were to do an education program, beginning it now, could help. Along with VPOTUS kicking butt as he does so well.

[Yes! Crazy Joe could plug it! "This is a big f***ing deal!" Great idea! Turn him loose! PUH-LEEZE!]

Nancy Pelosi and Howard Dean kicked ass on Press The Meat this morning.

[Howard the Doc! Him too! YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHH!!!!]

The best person to help Obama explain things is Rachel Maddow.

[Yes! Put her on Ellen. No, wait. . . .]

As much as I love Cenk. . . .

[So YOU'RE the one!]

As far as Current, I would say Spitzer.

[Client #9! Wow, these are all GREAT suggestions! Hey, what's Weiner doing? John Edwards? Dream Team, baby!]

35 Comments:

Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

"If Sebelius were to do an education program, beginning it now, could help." - A DU Troglaman Clone/Moonbat

Living on the border with Kansas we here in Northwest Missouri know that Sebelius is not only snobby and arrogant, she's also clueless and about as exciting as watching paint dry. In other words, just the right person for the DSA to put on TV to ensure the public gets good and ticked off at The One.

10:21 PM  
Blogger 98ZJUSMC said...

Along with VPOTUS kicking butt as he does so well.

ROFL....
ROFL....
ROFL....
ROFL....

or as retarded Joe goes:

^$!@*%(!@%#&@#%&%&7...

12:05 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

This has nothing to do with the above topic...

Isn't there another way to celebrate this holiday other than firing off gunpowder devices...that might catch other shit on fire? I swear to God one of my neighbors has been trying to burn down this entire island every 4th of July for fifteen years.

I, troglaman, am bravely standing ready with a garden hose as we speak. I can only hope I make it through the night.

If I don't, I want you all to tell your mothers that I loved them and that I'm sorry I ran out...

1:17 AM  
Anonymous Corona said...

(You feeling okay Troggy?)

Anyway, this article is like reading the print version of a Fail compilation video. And everyone's under 18.

8:44 AM  
Anonymous envisio said...

The mighty trog is afraid of fireworks. If you like, trog, I could ask my dog to make room under the couch so you can hide there with him when the mean Americans start shooting their fireworks.
You remind me of a neighbor I have that gets his panties in a wad when we start shooting our guns.
Yeah, he's a girly little faggot.

9:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nothing says America like beer and explosives.

11:05 AM  
Anonymous liptonius said...

This isn't serious,is it?

Pelosi? Biden? Sebelius? DEAN??

PSA's and talk shows?

THIS is a 'go-to' strategy when the proverbial house is on fire? When damage control is vital?

Man! These chuckleheads CAN'T be serious!

Can they?

2:36 PM  
Anonymous krazy kat said...

"I, troglaman am bravely standing ready with a garden hose...I can only hope to make it through the night."

And you call us pussies.

5:07 PM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

liptonius said...
This isn't serious,is it?

Pelosi? Biden? Sebelius? DEAN??

PSA's and talk shows?

THIS is a 'go-to' strategy when the proverbial house is on fire? When damage control is vital?

Man! These chuckleheads CAN'T be serious!

Can they?


They are DEADLY serious...you have to remember, you're talking about Troglaman Clones/Moonbats and where they are concerned, normally thinking and logic never applies.

6:02 PM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

Troglaman The Guttersnipe whined...

Isn't there another way to celebrate this holiday other than firing off gunpowder devices...that might catch other shit on fire? I swear to God one of my neighbors has been trying to burn down this entire island every 4th of July for fifteen years.


Nope...no less a luminary than John Adams advocated spectacular displays of fireworks and bonfires every Fourth of July.

And somehow I doubt your neighbor has the firepower to torch an island.

6:05 PM  
Blogger Son Of The Godfather said...

troglaman said...

If I don't, I want you all to tell your mothers that I loved them and that I'm sorry I ran out...


Mom says to tell you it's ok you ran out... Seeing your first vagina can be a traumatic affair.

8:25 PM  
Anonymous Skully said...

Anonymous said...

Nothing says America like beer and explosives.

...and grilled meat!!

8:55 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"The panic button is still depressed, and so are the DUmmies. They know the Affordable Tax Act (AFF-TAX!) will be a tough sell in November, so they want to be pro-Active and get people on board with it NOW." PJinc

It's a penalty. Do you know who came up with this health-care model? The Heritage Foundation and Bob Dole. It was an alternative to Hillary-Care at the time.

There's been only one state governor to successfully implement this very model. Mitt Romney! Mandates, tax penalties...the whole kit and kaboodle. It remains popular.

How can you ignore this? Romney now disagrees...with himself. Even though it's working pretty well in Mass., he is somehow compelled to poo poo his only signature act as governor. Doesn't this, on any fucking level, strike you as absurd? That Obamacare IS Romneycare?

Of course not!!! Business as usual.

12:59 AM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

Slamming his head up his ass like a jackhammer at Mach 20, TROGLAMAN - The Sick Perverted Clone of William Rivers Pitt - emitted the following pile of worthless mental excrement:

"There's been only one state governor to successfully implement this very model. Mitt Romney! Mandates, tax penalties...the whole kit and kaboodle. It remains popular.

How can you ignore this? Romney now disagrees...with himself. Even though it's working pretty well in Mass., he is somehow compelled to poo poo his only signature act as governor. Doesn't this, on any fucking level, strike you as absurd? That Obamacare IS Romneycare?"


First off, RomneyCare is NOT a success unless you are an illegal immigrant living in Massachusetts. And it is far from popular with the taxpayers who have to deal with the bureaucracy that has evolved to run RomneyCare and foot the bill. And sadly the taxpayers in Mass don't outnumber the Moonbats in enough areas to get people on Beacon Hill who want to throw the whole thing out.

It isn't working well in Mass...people are getting hammered for not only not having health care plans approved by the RomneyCare bureaucrats, their tax money is paying for health care that is truly free only for illegal immigrants and layabouts in the state. Romney is saying he didn't plan for it to play out as it has. He should have vetoed it, but didn't, and now Mass taxpayers are paying the price. At least Romney is smart enough to say it should be considered only on the state level and not imposed on the national level as it has been with ObamaCare.

It's not absurd that ObamaCare is RomneyCare - that was the plan. A massive power grab regardless of the law by people like you, Guttersnipe, who believe the majority of citizens in this country are just too stupid to run their own lives.

It's a clear indication of the level of your own stupidity, Guttersnipe, that you consider all this a success. Those of us in the real world know what it is...a disaster that will crush what is left of the middle class and finish the destruction of the private sector economy.

12:33 PM  
Anonymous krazy kat said...

troggy,

I hope you've recovered from your Fourth of July fireworks induced battle fatigue. Under Obamacare you could be elegible for PTSD payments, there's a special category for pussies.

3:28 PM  
Blogger TANSTAAFL said...

"It's a penalty."

It's a tax. It's multiple taxes. It's the largest tax increase in American history, you fascist lunatic.

4:06 PM  
Anonymous Tom said...

What??!! No one suggested he go on Anderson "I put my pecker in other mens' poopers" Cooper???

And speaking of people needing Obamacare, acouple of days ago Obama spoke in PA and dozens - dozens - of people passed out in the heat while he was speaking.

Also, today, July 6, Obama had breakfast at a fan's restaurant in Ohio. Hugged her, had breakfast, left. A couple of hours later she had a medical event and DIED.

You could say he's really knockin' 'em dead out there.

4:19 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"It's a tax. It's multiple taxes. It's the largest tax increase in American history, you fascist lunatic." TANSTAAFL

Wrong! Not even close.

Fucking barnacle.

You fuckers are so helplessly dumb...it boggles the mind.

So I hear Arizona is thinking of leaving the union. I, the mighty trog, am all for this. It's a good idea. It'll give you all a good and thriving place to go...the desert. Since climate change is all a lie, you should be just fine in a few years. Orchards. Wheat fields. And you could build a gigantic fence to keep everybody else out.

What's not to like about this?

1:44 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Romney is saying he didn't plan for it to play out as it has." Stinkwagon

He's not saying that. Name something somewhere that has him saying that. You can't. You just think you can, you deluded idiot.

What he's actually saying is that it works for Mass but wouldn't work for the rest of the country.

Are you all aware of the fact that 3 or 4 studies have found that Fox News viewers are actually stupider than people who don't watch any news at all? It's true.

2:24 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow...I had no idea troglatroll was a Fox News fanatic.

3:42 AM  
Blogger TANSTAAFL said...

It's a tax. It's multiple taxes. It's the largest tax increase in American history, you fascist lunatic.

And your denying that fact does not make it true, you fascist assblight.

9:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Interesting how the DUmmies all assume that the MSM (except FOX) will accomodate Democrat shills for the ACA.

...it's undoubtedly a valid assumption.

2:11 PM  
Anonymous The ULTIMATE Man said...

troglafuck said...

"It's a tax. It's multiple taxes. It's the largest tax increase in American history, you fascist lunatic." TANSTAAFL

Wrong! Not even close.

Fucking barnacle.

You fuckers are so helplessly dumb...it boggles the mind.


The only dumb fuck on here is YOU, Troglafuck, you racist lying fuckwad. That law has over $850 million in taxes built in to it and you can lie all you want about you fucking liar and it won't matter.

FOAD, Troglafuck, you racist fucking lying fucking worthless fucking fuckwad.

5:45 PM  
Blogger Trog said...

"And your denying that fact does not make it true, you fascist assblight." TANSTAAFL

It's not a fact. And your denying that it's not a fact makes you the fascist assblight. That too complicated for you?

It's not the biggest tax hike in history. Simple as that. Look it. The fuck. Up.

But, as is usually the case with you ditto-heads, facts don't matter. Obama's expanding government more than any other president in history? Nope. Affordable Health Care will increase the deficit? Nope.

Then we've got the little problem with climate change. You want to talk denial? Your answer to this problem, so far, is to cut fire fighters, police departments, and ambulance services. You've also reduced the number of those big air tankers and helicopters that dump water and fire retardant on these fires at least in half in the last 10 years.

This is how you all roll. You do things backwards.

Every RepuliDUm President since Nixon has raised deficits and expanded government. That's a fact. Every single one. The largest tax increase in recent history was made by Ronald Reagan. That's a fact.

And yet you all keep saying Obama has set historic records in spending, raising taxes, and expanding government.

And you're wrong. What a surprise! But I have no doubts you'll keep believing the horseshit anyway.

And that's why I love you.

1:10 AM  
Anonymous Kirk Johnson said...

You love us because we provide the bitch-slappings you know you deserve.

4:44 AM  
Blogger TANSTAAFL said...

"It's not a fact."

It is a fact. The IRS is going to enforce it. The Supreme Court said it is.

And yes, you are too stupid a fascist insect to understand reality.

"It's not the biggest tax hike in history."

Yes it is, insect.

"Obama's expanding government more than any other president in history?"

Truth, insect.

"Affordable Health Care will increase the deficit?"

Truth, insect.

"hen we've got the little problem with climate change."

The truth is that there is no such thing a CAGW, you ignorant fascist insect.

"Your answer to this problem, so far, is to cut fire fighters, police departments, and ambulance services."

Talk to your local government, inscect, they are all local responsibilities.

"You've also reduced the number of those big air tankers and helicopters that dump water and fire retardant on these fires at least in half in the last 10 years."

Nope, that's the Obama regime that did that, insect.

"And yet you all keep saying Obama has set historic records in spending, raising taxes, and expanding government."

All true, insect.

Now go crawl back under your rock.

8:10 AM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

No matter how often you power-slam your head up your ass, Guttersnipe, you can't lie enough to alter reality to fit your fantasy land.

You're a liar, Guttersnipe, you can't prove a thing you've said and you know it. Being a linguini-spined Moonbat lemming doesn't cut it. You may think that by being a linguini-spined Moonbat lemming as well as a hate-mongering Anti-American guttersnipe, you'll be safe from reality...sorry but it will hit you the hardest because you are among those who will be most incapable of dealing with it.

So show your cowardice and just keep lying like a rug as you power-slam your head up your ass, Troglaman the Guttersnipe. Reality is going to bitch-slap you into the middle of next year when it finally comes to your door....

8:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I swear to God one of my neighbors has been trying to burn down this entire island every 4th of July for fifteen years."

Well, if you are referring to Manhattan or Long Island, I don't see what the problem would be...

10:45 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Yes it is, insect." TANSTAAFL

It is not the biggest tax increase in history, dumbshit.

Fuck. Do your own work on this, you crouton. You're wrong. Ready?

Bush increase of 1990

Clinton increase of 1993

Oil windfall tax of 1980

Tax increase in 1966

Reagan tax increase of 1982

Excess profits tax of 1950

Temporary sucharge of 1968

Revenue act of 1950

Revenue act of 1951

ALL OF THESE WERE BIGGER TAX HIKES. Most of them by leaps and bounds.

So your claim is patently false.

The fact that you don't recognize this makes you a moron. Anyone checking out your claim can only conclude, regretfully, that you have the brain of a llama. Or a camel. Or a dung beetle.

But the sad fact is...you'll never admit it. In fact, you'll keep claiming you're right even when you know you're not.

I noticed tonight's top story is titled "The GOP is one of the most dire threats this country has ever faced (PJinc)"

Well yes. If you're all behind TANSTAAFL's blindingly stupid explanation of the largest tax hike in history, then we're all in fucking trouble. Know what?

I, troglaman, think you're all behind TANSTAAFL's blindingly stupid explanation of the largest tax hike in history. You believe it. Your friends believe it. Your boss believes it. Your mom believes it. Girlfriend. Brother. Pastor.

Even though it isn't true, this is what you ALL believe.

That's the part that's crazy scary.

So when PJinc then goes with "The GOP is one of the most dire threats this country has ever faced", it makes you all an automatic potent Freudian cocktail...guaranteed to fuck you up.

You've all gone dipshit crazy.

1:36 AM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

Terrified by reality, TROGLAMAN - The Sick Perverted Clone of William Rivers Pitt - power-slammed his head up his ass like a piston at Mach 20 and emitted pile of pile of worthless mental excrement while foaming at the mouth and howling like a mad dog...

Like I said, Guttersnipe, you can power-slam your head up your ass until hell freezes over and you can't warp reality to your fantasy-world concepts. It's going to crush you like an empty beer can, Guttersnipe, and you are just too gutless to face it.

3:07 PM  
Anonymous The JUDGE said...

Troglatwit, the worthless son of a worthless fucking bastard howled...

"The fact that you don't recognize this makes you a moron. Anyone checking out your claim can only conclude, regretfully, that you have the brain of a llama. Or a camel. Or a dung beetle.

But the sad fact is...you'll never admit it. In fact, you'll keep claiming you're right even when you know you're not."


Excellent job of projection and self-describing how you are you worthless son of a worthless fucking bastard.

1:26 AM  
Blogger TANSTAAFL said...

"ALL OF THESE WERE BIGGER TAX HIKES. Most of them by leaps and bounds"

No they weren't, you fascist moron.

6:05 AM  
Blogger TANSTAAFL said...

"You've all gone dipshit crazy."

Saith the barking fascist moonbat.

OH TEH IRONY SHE BURNS SHE BURNS!!!!

6:06 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"ALL OF THESE WERE BIGGER TAX HIKES. Most of them by leaps and bounds (the mighty trog)" No they weren't, you fascist moron." TANSTAAF

Prove it, shit for brains. Prove me wrong.

I'll save you the trouble...you can't. You aren't going to win this argument. Simple refutation doesn't count. Name calling doesn't count.

The fact is that the tax penalties assessed on people NOT having health insurance will not add up to THE HUGEST TAX INCREASE EVER IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD. All you have to do is to look to Massachusetts where Obamacare has been going on for years under the guise of Romneycare. Tax revenue from penalties is fairly negligible.

But what the fuck do you care?

Here's the deal...it's not the biggest tax-hike in history. And you're full of shit.

Turn your radio to Rush and go to bed. Like usual.

2:23 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"You love us because we provide the bitch-slappings you know you deserve." Kirk

Got that right, big boy!

(shit..inner homo's going a little wild right now...thanks alot shithead)

1:28 AM  

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