Friday, January 22, 2010

Air America and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Week



It's been a rough week for the DUmmies. In a span of three days, Brown wins "Teddy's seat," the Supreme Court strikes a blow for free speech, and Air America announces it is going off the air. The DUmmies are in deep, deep depression! Up the meds! It's been a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Week!

Sample the despair and the anger here in this
THREAD, "Air America Ceasing Live Programming This Afternoon." The DUmmie downers are in Radical Radio Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, looking forward to the day when the SCOTUS overturns its unconstitutional Roe v. Wade decision of 37 years ago today, is in the [brackets]:

Air America Ceasing Live Programming This Afternoon

[How would anybody tell the difference?]

Source: Air America

[Source: Err America]

It is with the greatest regret, on behalf of our Board, that we must announce that Air America Media is ceasing its live programming operations as of this afternoon, and that the Company will file soon under Chapter 7 of the Bankruptcy Code to carry out an orderly winding-down of the business.

[Bankrupt it.]

The very difficult economic environment has had a significant impact on Air America's business.

[Bush's fault.]

This past year has seen a "perfect storm" in the media industry generally.

[A perfect ROVIAN storm!]

In this climate. . . .

[Climate change.]

our painstaking search for new investors. . . .

[Blah blah blah. Excuses excuses excuses. Bottom line: Nobody wants to listen to a bunch of boring whiny liberals. Now let's hear from your vast audience of depressed DUmmie listeners . . .]

What a sh*tty week

[The Week When Everything Finally Changed. Hee! Hee!]

I can't take much more.

[Just wait till November!]

Totally. UGH.

[This could be. HUGH.]

Either suck it up, or give up!

[GET TOUGH, CREAM PUFF!]

You actually expected AA to survive? It's a miracle (or an immense waste of money) it lasted THIS long.

[George $oro$ got tired of immensely wasting his money.]

RIP.

[Ratings-Impoverished Programming.]

Any other bad news out there? Let's make this the worst week since Nov. 2004.

[This just in: John Kerry is about to enter the Deconcession Chamber.]

Schultz and Hartmanns ratings in major markets pretty much suck. They're in the middle of the pack at the very best. Even in the most progressive cities like New York, DC and Chicago, neither of them gets a fraction of Limbaugh's audience . . .

[True, please continue . . .]

GRieve all you want, but don't resort to self-depeption . . .

[Self-depeption is bad. It takes all the pep out of you.]

Liberal talk is failing badly.

[EPIC Fail! Thank you, keysersoeze (21 posts), for that correct but bitter pill to swallow. For this brief moment of mental clarity, you win a Kewpie Doll--before you get called out as a LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

Air America is kind of like the ABA of Political Radio and Ed Schultz is Doctor J.

[Air America is kind of like the ABBA of Political Radio and Ron Reagan is the Dancing Queen.]

The "local affiliates" . . . who knows whether their owners might decide "this proves there's no market for progressive radio" and switch formats?

[Now where would they get such a crazy idea??]

my local station . . . AAR's demise would leave them with several large blocks of dead air to fill.

[AAR *was* dead air! A test of the Emergency Broadcast System would get higher ratings.]

THe problem is, most of them will likely drop "progressive" talk, becuase it's just not making it in the market. . . . Conservative talk radio makes a lot of money; progressive talk is doing very badly.

[Man, keysersoeze (21 posts), you are really cruising for a tombstoning!]

There is a lot of money to be made in servicing the needs of the power elites. Speaking truth to power, on the other hand, not so much.

["Speak truth to power"! Drink up!]

So what you're saying is that "power elites" and their spending are what forces people to listen to Limbaugh et al? And their high revenues are a result of their number of stations - but Limbaugh and Hannity also get better audience numbers per station, as in *many times better*, than any liberal host. Please explain how "power elites" control listening habits.

[You, keysersoeze (21 posts), have GOT to be a LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

Obvious troll here. . . . Enjoy your stay at DU.

[MAYDAY! MAYDAY! PREPARE FOR TOMBSTONING!]

Randi Rhodes hasn't been with AAR for years. She had a falling-out with them. . . .

[. . . and a falling-down on the sidewalk.]

Sure that wasnt a falling down? /rimshot

[I'm not kidding: I did NOT see that next DUmmie comment! Even the DUmmies know Randi has a little "problem."]

She's on the Washington DC AA station

[She should be in an AA group!]

Attention, Numbnutses: NOT ALL PROGRESSIVE PROGRAMMING IS AIR AMERICA. . . . Some of you people are stupid enough to be Bush voters.

["How to Win Friends and Influence DUmmies," by keysersoeze (21 posts).]

There is no need to be rude. . . . If you can't be civil to others, maybe you shouldn't be on DU.

[I thought that was a prerequisite!]

the network got no ratings, and even THOSE numbers were preaching to the choir.

[keysersoeze (21 posts): Speaking truth to DUmmies.]

johnny deep pockets could have made a big difference.

[John Kerry has your back . . . in his pockets.]

I cannot believe there isn't some liberal billionaire out that doesn't invest in Progressive Radio.

[I thought billionaires were inherently evil?]

They didn't treat thier talent well and made bad decision like hiring Lionel who has a voice that makes my skin crawl.

[Lionel Itchie.]

I listened to AAR some and found it teeth-grindingly bad.

[Skin crawling, teeth grinding--AAR was a downright health hazard!]

Progressives are terrible radio entertainers. . . .

[Dr. keysersoeze (21 posts) has more bitter medicine to administer. It's amazing he hasn't been banned yet! Please continue . . .]

Look, believe what you want. Weeks like this past week are at least in part due to the fact that progressives are masters at persuading themselves that something that walks, talks and smells like a duck, is a goose.

[AFLAC!]

Thank you Air America. . . . What a shame, I am sad.

[The DUmmies are down in the DUmps. I predict a surge in antidepressant med threads.]

Let's work on this rationally.

[BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!]

Our product wasn't selling. The American people were not buying what we were selling. . . . what can we do about it?

[Take more Zoloft.]

AA's big problem was that they were all - every one of them - awful to listen to. . . . progressives talk radio is usually very condescending and nannyish. . . . They were dull, shrill and yes, boring.

[DUmmie keysersoeze (21 posts), if you are not a LOUSY FREEPER TROLL, you are going in the Kewpie Doll Hall of Fame!]

As another poster said, what a sh*tty week.

[Lexapro (escitalopram oxalate) is a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI) indicated for the acute and maintenance treatment of Major Depressive Disorder (MDD). . . .]

It's sad, but only for a moment.

[I take my little happy pill, and Calgon, take me away!]

and the hits just keep on coming. . . .

[Heckuva job, Brownie! Hee hee!]

and a comin'.

[There is no joy in Medville--Marsha Coakley has struck out.]

It's maddening isn't it?

[It's medicating isn't it?]

This attitude is not only EXACTLY why Limbaugh kicks progressive talkers' asses, but why we are losing elections; that boundless sense of entitlement and superiority. If we THINK we're smarter/better/cuter than conservatives, it's hubris, and it'll backfire. Just like it did all this week.

[Mikulski, DeLauro, Waxman . . . of COURSE they are cuter than Palin, Bachmann, and Brown! . . . DUmmie keysersoeze (21 posts), you are on a ROLL--and I can't believe you are still here! This thread goes on from here for quite a few posts, but I checked the end, and you are still not banned! Congratulations! You outlived Air America!]

- - - - -

BONUS COVERAGE: Some more posts from this long thread, after the first installment . . .

I don't think it's all dead for us and there are so many shining stars that were born - just by sitting in for the original stars.

[DNC-ing with the Stars.]

Can you all post what the stars say - especially Randi - I am not awake when she is on. . . .

[Neither is she.]

I feel like I am suffocating for all the bad news of the week.

[Take a deep breath . . . and some Effexor.]

Your a freeper. I don't buy the concern troll.

You pegged the bastid!


[keysersoeze (21 posts) is one of the Usual Suspects.]

I was just thinking: sh*t happens in threes: Brown, SCOTUS, and what else? Air America! Sh*t sh*t absolute sh*t.

[The Three Stool-sh*ts.]

I remember the old days. When they first launched, it was breathtaking.

[Suffocating, in fact.]

I am just about ready to chew on my wrists. I really don't now how much more I can take. . . .

[Wrist In Pieces.]

Scott Brown, Citizens United v. FEC, and now THIS. I'm gonna be sadder than a spoiled white suburban middle school girl limping into a theater to watch New Moon.

[Is that you, Scott Ritter?]

So many thoughts circle my mind.

[New experiences need not frighten.]

Sad and awful news. What else can happen this week?

[See if Pitt has made any more rosy predictions. Then bank on the opposite.]

Maybe I'll start my own Pirate Radio.. How would one go about doing that?

[Ask Johnny Depp Pockets.]

Sad and sorry to hear this.

[Thank Gaia for Big Pharma!]

7 Comments:

Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

Err America going off the air just was the cherry on the cake for an incredible week of watching the Moonbat/Troglaman Clones getting a thorough and vicious beatdown that's been LONG overdue.

Justice always prevails even against Moonbats and Troglaman clones. And it really gives me a smile because those are the most clueless of fools thinking they are the majority and nothing bad is going to happen to them.

9:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ya know, Jerome, even troggy boy found the program so da** boring, even HE wouldn't listen to it.
That's the truth. Prove me wrong troggy boy.

Skul

2:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Keep posting stuff like this i really like it

6:43 AM  
Anonymous Anon 1:50 said...

In The Bible, when recounting the end of something bad, the phrase "and it came to pass", is used.

(I think it's something like 30 times this is used).

Never, in famine, flood, pestilence, or oppression does it say "and it came to stay".

So?

Well, isn't it possible that if you are about perpetrating "bad things", eventually, eventually mind you, good will prevail and things like Air America, Marsha Coakley, Obamacare, Obama, etc., etc., "will come to pass"?

And then there will be rejoicing!

-Then we can eat the minstrels (h/t Monty Python).

Dibs on Sheryl Crow!

2:27 PM  
Anonymous Anon 1:50 said...

And Now for something not so completely different!

Our host and founder of the feast, Mr. Gladnick, has contributed a sparkling entry over at NewsBusters!

http://newsbusters.org/blogs/p-j-gladnick/2010/01/23/leftwing-professor-writes-hilarious-essay-about-conan-obama

The essay is long, windy, whiny, (Really, Anon? From a Progessive Professor? What are the odds?), and not entirely accurate. (I repeat, "what are the odds"?)

If you are in the mood, have a run at this:
TITLE: "How to Squander the Presidency in One Year, or,
Hey, Conan Obama: How About Now? Can You Hear Us Now?"

A sad but hilarious sack of, um, stuff, from a 'man' doing some hindsight quarterbacking from his Ivory Tower, probably while his enema is warming.

If you took the above comments from this DU thread and had them expanded and written by an encyclopedia author, you'd get close to this snortfest.

Thanks Peej!

10:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great job! I haven't laughed this hard since the Frosting on Dogsh*t post.(01/30/06)

10:07 AM  
Anonymous College Term Papers said...

I guess sometimes truth is stranger than fiction!

12:20 AM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home