"This is Rove's 'Night of the Long Knives'"

As soon as I heard Mark Foley's named mentioned on the news when I turned on the radio last Friday, I knew in general what the story would involve before even hearing the report. You see, Foley's proclivities were no mystery to me. I've known about them ever since I first saw Mark Foley on the tube back when he was first elected to Congress in 1994 because my metrosexual waist pack (about which the vicious rightwing Freepers at the Free Republic never cease giving me grief), which has highly developed powers of gaydar, started glowing brightly whenever he appeared on tube. Also Foley dropped out of the 2004 Senate race from Florida because of rumors about him. Of course, if Foley had been a Democrat, he would have been lauded and re-elected as happened to Congressman Gerry Studds when he was caught having sexual relations with a congressional male page. However, not only has Foley resigned in disgrace but for a brief time the DUmmiecrats hailed this scandal as meaning that the Republcans would LOSE the House in the elections this November. I guess the news recently has been so demoralizing for them they are willing to grasp at any straw to seek some sort of hope. However, over the weekend, depressing reality began to set in once again and the DUmmiecrats have resumed their usual gloom and doom of late. In fact, many now see this Foley scandal as being part of a Vast Rovian Plot as you can see in this THREAD titled, "This is Rove's 'Night of the Long Knives'." This is in reference to Hitler's power play liquidation of S.A. head, Ernst Roehm and many of his associates in June 1934 using the fact they were of the homosexual persuasion as the excuse for the purge. BTW, a little known fact about Ernst Roehm is that for six years, from 1925 to 1931, he served as a big adviser to the military in Bolivia. In fact he claimed to have "buggered" every officer cadet in the Bolivian army during that period. Almost nothing is known about Roehm's "service" in Bolivia so this might make for an interesting topic for an historian out there to look into although I have a feeling that officials in Bolivia won't be very helpful in providing information, especially if they are relatives of one or more of those Buggered Bolivians... As usual, the tinfoil hat postulations by the DUmmies about Vast Rovian Conspiracies are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, thinking about buying an extra-large waist pack this week, is in the [brackets]:

This is Rove's "Night of the Long Knives"

[Which he dreamt up on the night that the Third American Empire was born when jubilant American nationalists screamed "USA! USA! USA!" when the United States won an Olympic hockey game against the Soviets in 1980.]

All the closet perverts that the GOP have been using have finally given Bush what he wanted: dictatorial power. He doesn't need them any more. So as Hitler wiped out the SA (brownshirts) which was full of homosexuals, Rove will wipe out the closet gays (unless they are real players in the inner circle).

[This is what is known as a stretched analogy. Verrrrry strrrrreeeeetched.]

Bush will say he is shocked and prosecute them all. The fundamentalists will buy this lie, and see Bush rooting out the dreaded queers. They will miss the fact that the dreaded queers are all REPUBLICANS. (If they can buy that John Kerry isn't a war hero, then they can buy that the GOP were decieved by these sneaky queers. No problem in Bizarro world. Just turn on the media machine.)

[Speaking of Bizarro world...]

I just can't be a coincidence theorists on this.

[True. You can't be a coincidence theorist on this. You MUST be a tinfoil hat theorist on this.]

It's not a coincidence that the story broke the day after Bush got dictatorial power.

[That nobody but the DUmmies noticed when the Detainee Interrogation bill passed.]

Its not a coincidence that Foley's Democratic opponent is a recent "convert" from the GOP, who just happens to be a screaming fundie.

[A friend of mine has a warbling canary so I think he would like to add a screaming fundie to his collection.]

Its not a coincidence that all the potential victims are second-rate hacks, like Hastert and Boenner. The powers that be are just cleaning house.

[Hastert and Boehner are "second rate hacks?" Now I know you are stretching.]

I predict that Newt Gingrich will be speaker of the house again.

[I predict that Mike Tyson will become a model for Abercrombie & Fitch.]

This is getting rid of the street thugs who got the dictator into power. The hard-core fundamentalists are hanging onto power. They finally will be able to draw blood. It doesn't matter that it is GOP blood, because it will allow them to pass even stricter laws against sexual conduct.

[Will it become illegal for me to rub Petra Verkaik in my dreams?]

It is politically brilliant. His fundie followers will swallow any koolaid to keep believing in Godly George.

[I already picked up a few tacky Godly George candles at the Dollar Store.]

The Democrats should stay on the topic of dictatorial power and the mess in Iraq. They can point out the total hypocrisy of the GOP on sex, but they should leave the press to do the work on this.

[Katie Couric was practically glowing with joy when she reported the Foley scandal on Friday. And now on to the equally bizarre comments from the other DUmmies...]

I think the Foley situation was a major F-up, though, by the Repubs, and nothing more. Boehner and Hastert never got their stories straight before talking to the press, which means Rove didn't have time to coach them.

[ALL is perfectly pre-planned by the Mighty Rove.]

Isn't bush's shadow government still in place? The one he formed after 9/11 to replace everybody in Congress "in a worse-cased scenario"? That may be a candidate pool for them. Bushco could throw out 100 GOP Congressmen pre-election, tell their voters to "vote for the R on the ballot even though he resigned" and "we'll replace him with an EVEN BETTER candidate once the party wins." Then, they stack Congress with bush sychophants who will make the do-nothing Congress look like a civil rights rally. Don't forget - Rove has the down-n-dirty on everybody in Congress. They could threaten them easily: "either resign NOW with the excuse that you were negligent in policing Foley, or we'll let the world know about your trysts with those kids in the Dominican Republic." What RW fuck wouldn't take that deal? Could happen.

[Yeah, just like the draft COULD happen as MTV kept repeating just before the 2004 election.]

they've already started in on Barney Frank

[I heard those EVIL Republicans are spreading the vicious rumor that Barney Frank's boyfriend is running a male prostitution ring from Barney's house.]

I still want the fundie organizations to speak up about Foley
or give them your comments. They need to have enough guts to take a stand. Force them to do so.

[Force the Fundies to do so for no discernable purpose.]

Jumping into the Foley frenzy will just reinforce the total lack of awareness that our government has been overthrown.

[Overthown last Thursday when Bush assumed dictatorial powers in the Alternate Reality.]

I think you're on to something where the core Evangelicals
will clean house of the degenerate debris and like you said about Newt...they will attempt to recycle him back as a player.

[What's with this Gingrich fixation? Well, never mind. At least it is FUnnie!]

That Karl. Is there anything he can't do?

[He can't sew and cha-cha dance at the same time.]

Can the repubs put just anybody they want to in Foley`s seat?? This could get very interesting. Isn`t Jeb out of work as of January??

[Li'l Beaver is available.]

How soon we forget Hastert's maneuver in illegally seating Bilbray... he basically gave the Speaker the dictatorial power to appoint anyone he wants, regardless of election results. Another service rendered on the way to the chopping block.

[It is now somehow illegal to seat the candidate who gets the most votes.]

No I think the Foley case has other origins. Don't know what, but such a scandal is the last thing the GOP needs right now.

[It will have as much impact as the Abramoff "scandal" which everybody has pretty much forgotten by now if they ever even remembered it in the first place.]

Strange that you say long knives. Could the penis measuring revalations be a kind of coded signal to the "insiders" on how the plan for full spectum world domination is moving along..? weird.The coincidence in the archetypal stuff.

[When you hear Dick Cheney say the secret code word, "John Holmes" on TV, that is the signal for the "insiders" to strike at once for world domination.]

This story will fade as all the other scandals have done.
Something else will take it's place in a week. This is a temporary injury to the RWing. Most of the RWing stalwarts will view this a freak aberration and an anti-Gay issue. The Gannon/Guckert scandal is ancient history now. The RWing religio Zealots mostly ignored that. Americans seem almost shock proof after all the shocking events of the past five years.

[Ah yes. Although almost completely forgotten now, there was a two week period of complete jubilation in the Spring of 2005 in DUmmieland because they were under the delusion that the Jeff Cannon "scandal" would bring down the the entire Bush Regime. Among the most laughable of the notions put forward then was that Jeff Gannon would be arrested for being gay and then forced to talk as part of a plea bargain. Oh, and the FUndies were also supposed to be so outraged by Gannon that they would remove Bush from the White House. This all sounds crazy now but guess what? It sounded just as crazy then.]

The actual situationbe somewhat out of control, but they have almost total control of the media. They have called black white before and gotten away with it. As they say, reality doesn't matter - we create reality.

[Much in the same way that the DUmmies created their own reality of Kerry being inaugurated as president on Jan. 20, 2005.]

I think that children are involved in this one
will give it legs. Soccer moms won't like the idea of their boys (or boys the same age of their boys at home) being schtumped by old men and that there was tacit longstanding agreement among the old men that it was 'ok' and a rite of passage for working in DC.

[So will the DUmmiecrats now finally agree that it is probably NOT a good idea to have gays as scoutmasters? Somehow I don't think that will happen.]

Wasn't there an Abramoff connected hookergate as well?

[No. You're probably confusing it with 9/11 being plotted aboard a casino boat owned by Abramoff.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I have a VERY SPECIAL offer for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.