Monday, January 19, 2009

DUmmies exult, "This is the dawning of a new era!"

Can you FEEL the birth pangs in the cosmos? Can you SENSE your consciousness being raised? Feel it, sense it, taste it, touch it! It's coming, and it will be here in less than 24 non-business hours!! The DUmmies are beside themselves! "This is the dawning of a NEW ERA!!!" PRAISE GAIA!! PRAISE OBAMASSIAH! PRAISE US!! WE ARE THE CHANGE WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR!!!!!! Just get a load of this THREAD, "Today feels so much like New Year's Eve to me..."

Hey, it's cosmic and it's comic! This is the dawning of a new era for the DUmmie FUnnies, too! An era of HILARITY, as the sky-high hopes of the DUmmies are sure to come crashing down to earth--and mirth! So before we get to the DUmmie ecstatic utterances, let us first sing this hot-off-the-press promise of comedy to come, from yours truly, the wag tailoring the doggerel. Click the music link and sing along!

Tune: "Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In" Original

When the moonbats win the White House
And stupider aligns with Marx
Then we will mock the moonbats
We'll laugh to hear their barks

This is the dawning of an age that's hilarious
Age that's hilarious

Parody of Undergrounders
Comedy and laughs abounding
So much fodder for the FUnnies
From the blotter of the DUmmies
When they're let down by Obama
There'll be comic melodrama

When the moonbats win the White House
And stupider aligns with Marx
Then we will mock the moonbats
We'll laugh to hear their barks

This is the dawning of an age that's hilarious
Age that's hilarious

Let the moonbats, let the moonbats in, the moonbats in
Let the moonbats, let the moonbats in, the moonbats in
Let the moonbats, let the moonbats in, the moonbats in . . .

Oh, let 'em fly, c'mon
Now everybody just bark along
And let the moonbats on in
Open up the DUFUs and let 'em fly on in
And when you want FUnnie, hey, let 'em fly on
You got to open up the DUFUs and let 'em fly on in
And when you feel like you need a freepin'
And your blogs turn too bleak for you
Just open the DUFUs and let 'em fly on in
You got to DUFU
You got to DUFU
Open up the DUFUs and let 'em fly on in
Let me tell you one thing
I want you to laugh along with the DUmmie FUnnies
Hey, open up the DUFUs
And let 'em fly
The Beaver will say
Hey, you got to DUFU
You got to DUFU . . .

Now on to the DUmmies and their orgasmic Obama hyperventilating, in Dawning-of-a-New-Day Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, getting things ready to wash his hair all day tomorrow, is in the [Barackets]:

Today feels so much like New Year's Eve to me...

[It feels like a New AGE!]

Tomorrow is the start of a brand new year for all of us...

[A new EON! Let's redate everything "A.O."!]

We're done wandering in the wilderness...

[I can SEE the Promised Land!]

What a great day!

[The Day Before the Day When Everything Finally Changed--Finally!]

Not saying we don't have big problems to fix.

[And if there are any problems that Obamassiah doesn't fix on the First Day, that will be Bush's Fault.]

everything is possible now. . . .

[Oh yes! Yes! Yes! YES!!!]

Come, take my hand...

[My trembling, quivering hand, aflutter with excitement!]

Into the future for all of us...

[WHISK us away, Obamassiah!]

Tommorow will be a good day. I think some folks finally get it.

[Some of us are getting sick.]

It just hit me, really hit me, today...

[Like a 2 x 4 upside the head.]

Isn't it amazing?

[Isn't it amusing?]

I'll probably be up very late tonight because I won't be able to sleep from excitement.

[Let's have a slumber party and stay up all night!]

It'll be a good time to finish The Audacity of Hope.

[Who wrote that, anyway? Was that another Ayers ghost-write job?]

A truly historical moment...

[A truly hysterical moment. . . .]

Someone just shook my hand in the grocery store!

[Did they use the hand sanitizer afterward?]

I am wearing my Obama sweatshirt.

[And your Obama underoos?]

There was a brilliance in our exchange.

[Exchange we can't believe in!]

A relief.

[A real laugh.]

there is so much optimism among the American people that seems to have been bottled up.

[When Obambi lets you down, DUmmies, you'll be REACHING for a bottle!]

this is the dawning of a new era.

[Universal enlightenment, world peace, daffodils and daisies, laughter and levitation! Ommmmmm. . . . .]

I actually started to cry.

[Tears of joy, flowing freely! Yes, it's a five-tissue day!]

I've been crying in my thread. . . .

[Try a full hankie.]

What a day, what a day of reckoning.

[A Day of Barackoning.]

I love to be alive now. . . .

[From the worst time in the history of humanity . . . to the most glorious dawning of a new and golden day! All thanks to the Young Prince!]

I love all people today.

[Except Bush.]

I was just thinking that I wish I still had my Christmas tree up and all the lights outside. I would have loved to plug everything back in for tonight and tomorrow night and light this republican neighborhood of mine right up.

[You are truly a Light-worker.]

I can't wait to dance the first dance with my husband tomorrow night, along with Barack and Michelle. I'm going to wear black velvet and spikey shoes.

[Calm down, ben.]

My front porch light just burned out! I think it's a sign!!

[How many Obamas does it take to change a light bulb we can believe in? Just . . . The One!]

I still feel a strange surge of hope.

[Is it kind of a tingle up your leg, Chris?]

We're all so FULL OF HOPE that it's overflowing all over the place.

[I would say you're full of something else that's overflowing.]

Here comes the sun. . . .

[Here come the moonbats!]

It's frigging infectious!!

[We always shower after visiting DUmmieland.]


Blogger Paul Mitchell said...

Honestly this sounds like a bunch of four year olds on Christmas Eve. These cannot be adults. Well hopefully the one that said he was married and gonna dance with their kid's other daddy. I wasn't really sure what to make of that.

Point is, they are not serious, huh?

12:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So damn lame.

3:41 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


I'm not going to pee on their happiness, even if it is a bit creepy and 'over the top'.

I hope that this particular collection is archived somewhere, because when expectations, hopes and giddiness are this unrealistically high...

Reality has a way of REALLY crashing in.

6:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

True, they have set the bar so hight for him it is difficult to see how he can get up to it, assuming he isn't actually the Messiah/Quisatch Haderach/Whatever.

I hope his Presidency turns out much better than I honestly expect, but only time will tell.

10:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"My front porch light just burned out! I think it's a sign!!"

It is a sign. Think about it. It's last day of the Bush administration, and the light outside is dying. Not a very good omen, is it?

10:42 AM  
Blogger Paul Mitchell said...

I am just curious though, do I really need to pay this insurance bill, it's due the 25th, or we all okay on that now?

I'm thinking that instead of paying it, I can go eat a really nice steak.

11:13 AM  
Blogger Mo K said...

Unbelievable. (And yet believable, cuz it's DUmmies we're talking about.) I got a good laugh when I got this email from hubby at his office: Fortunately there's no one here, and no TV on this floor, and I can just close my office door anyway. We did get an email this morning from the CEO saying that Fellatiation was on on the big TV in the executive conference room if we wanted to come up and watch it. But I figured it would be best not to mar my last couple of days with this company by dropping trou and pressing my ass up against the big screen in front of everyone.

11:49 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


I voted for Reagan and for both Bushes.

I enjoyed their wins privately, never rubbed it in anyone's face, and certainly did NOT think of them as saviors - just the best men for the job.

Moonbats. What a wonderful name for these losers (yes, losers)

1:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...and the DJIA drops into the 7K's, almost half of what it was before the Dhims took over Congress.

8:35 PM  
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