"What is the best argument you can make for Barack Obama?"
Democratic Underground is more like Democratic Underwhelmed these days, at least as far as President Obama is concerned. To say there is an enthusiasm gap would be the Democratic Understatement of the year. In today's edition of DUmmie FUnnies, DUmmie kentuck posts this THREAD, "What is the best argument you can make for Barack Obama?" and the answers he gets are Decidedly Underwhelming. It's a case of damning with faint prez.
So let us join the disillusioned, dispirited DUmmies, in Blehh-shevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, not surprised that the Occidental Tourist would need a long vacation after that grueling three-day bus tour, is in the [Barackets]:
What is the best argument you can make for Barack Obama? That he seems incapable of making for himself?
[He seems incapable of many things.]
Perhaps you might say that he saved us from another Great Depression? At least, so far, if the Republicans don't screw it up even more?
Perhaps you might argue that his stimulus program, although too small, kept unemployment from going to 12% or 13%?
Perhaps you might say that he put country over Party and saved this country from unknown hardships?
[Perhaps you might say that he saved us from a worldwide catastrophe and certain death and we just don't know about it, but, hey, who knows?]
Perhaps you might argue that history will judge him as one of our greatest Presidents?
[Let me think about that one for a moment . . .
OK, I'm thinking . . .
Hmmm . . .
Let's try to focus on the positive. Give us the big picture.
[So we go now to the BHO-positive DUmmies . . .]
He gives nice speeches. Sorry, I tried.
Once upon a time....now they seem phony.
[Fire the teleprompter!]
I believe that Barack Obama is capable of doing that which he puts his mind to.
[He takes GREAT vacations!]
He's our first Black President . . .
I believe he has good intentions, but has no capability to put his plans into action. He can tell you the destination is California, but is incapable of putting together a route to get there.
[So THAT'S how they ended up in Martha's Vineyard!]
he annoys the sh*t out of the purists. . . .
[Oh, he does more than that. He annoys the sh*t out of EVERYONE!]
That's the argument that I am supposed to present when I go knocking on doors?
I purely wish he was the same man who campaigned and reached out to the left. Oh. I'm sorry. He IS that person. He simply LIED to the left.
[That's what the last guy said.]
He sucks less than any of the Republicans.
and yet the bowl still swirls. . . .
[Obama is flush with suck-less.]
Plays well with others.
[Will let other golfers play through.]
He has a beautiful intelligent wife. . . .
and an adorable intelligent dog.
[Bo knows B.O.]
Obama isn't a dumb-f***, fundamentalist, anti-science, racist. . . .
[No rethuglican he!]
He's not a loose cannon. . . .
[He's more of a loose can-ner.]
He said that fixing our economic mess would take years to fix.
[At the rate he's going, it could take till . . . well, let's see . . . carry the 2 . . . until the Twelfth of Never.]
he's pushed through more progressive legislation than any President since LBJ. . . .
[There you go! Compare BHO to the man who gave us Vietnam AND the Great Society! That's a winner! Say, how did LBJ's re-elect strategy work out in '68?]
30 million people will be able to go to the doctor more often than they were previously able to. . . .
[Obama makes people SICK!]
How about this: What the f*** has Obama done so far?
[Not much of an endorsement there.]
Saying positive things about Obama on DU has become nothing but flamebait.
[Fire in the hole!]
don't change horses in the middle of a stream.
[But it's a stream of red ink!]
Extended Benefits to same-sex partners of federal employees. . . .
We need Howard Dean again.
He's clean, nice breath, a class act all the way.
[Clean, articulate, bright. . . .]
You could see having a Martini with him . . .
[At a Beer Summit.]
He's better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick.
[It's close, though.]
He eats his peas.
[Give peas a chance.]
I've already started to forget him.
[That's what the last guy said.]