Monday, October 11, 2010

"Why do we still celebrate Columbus day?"

For at least the past 30 years, the Left has slammed Christopher Columbus like clockwork on or around Columbus Day so much that it has already become a tiresome cliché. The DUmmies have followed this tradition this year as could be expected. Hey, DUmmies! There is absolutely nothing original about slamming Columbus around Columbus Day but that hasn't stopped the DUmmies as you can see in this THREAD, "Why do we still celebrate Columbus day?" YAWN! So let us now watch the DUmmies recycle the same old hackneyed slams against Columbus in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting that his cousin attended Christopher Columbus High School until he was forced out due to its change to Fort Apache, is in the [brackets]:


Why do we still celebrate Columbus day?

[Stand by for yet more completely UNORIGINAL leftwing slams on Christopher Columbus.]

Columbus was not the first to discover America. Everything about this legend is wrong. You can't discover something that was already there and already occupied by people. The Vikings were apparently there first, maybe even some Chinese folks, but it's been proven long ago that Columbus was not the first. Yet tomorrow is a federal holiday, no mail delivery, and a day off for millions of Americans.

[And a day off for the DUmmies...but then every day is a day off for them.]

Hell, Chris was looking for a route to China for gold when he stopped off in the Bahamas, and he left disaster in his wake for the local inhabitants, and we know the rest of the awful truth, yet we still teach this bullshit fable to our kids.

[And this DUmmie gets an "F" for originality.]

Come on America, face it, we need to drop the fables and get real about history.

[Real history like how the Aztecs were cutting the living hearts out of their captives in Mexico? Oops! We need to overlook such inconvenient historical truths. But for those interested, here is an absolutely brilliant ARTICLE on this topic. The author must be a genius.

I believe there were people here a long time ago. Before the Vikings, before even the Chinese.

[Latvians?]

Exactly, so the whole Columbus fairy tale is silly

[Yeah, an absolute myth. His ships never went farther than Barcelona.]

Ask the Navajos and Apaches who discovered America

[The Hopi Elders?]

Because the Italian-American community holds onto this tradition. I should say first that I don't know what it's like in places where there are no Italians, Italian-Americans, or where the old world traditions are dead:

[You must not have been to Wolf Point, Montana. I've been there and, believe me, no Italian for at least a hundred miles.]

As a people who also experienced prejudice, I can't for the life of me understand why Italians can't empathize with native americans, and shift to another day for their cultural celebrations. Its not like there aren't plenty of Italian TRUE heroes they could choose!

[How about Iron Eyes Cody? Ironically, despite playing many Indian roles in the movies and passing himself off as an authentic Indian, he was really a full-blooded Italian.]

In any case, I am very fortunate to live in a part of the country where we recognize tomorrow as Indigenous Peoples Day, and that is what my son will grow up with.

[So you live in Berkeley, CA?]

Some even have the theory that Columbus was not Italian

[Latvian?]

he was a plague bacillus that's only thing the pervert did- his crew were dripping with dis ease.

[This from a DUmmie with the drips.]

Columbus was an idiot who got lost

[If only he had taken a right at the Sargasso Sea, he would have found China.]

And his idiocy lives on today. Not just with Columbus Day, but the fact that the indigenous people of this continent are still called "Indians", because Chris the idiot didn't know where he was.

[I once wanted to be PC and called an Indian a "Native American. He got pissed and told me that Indians ALWAYS referred to each other as Indians.]

The term 'Indians' for native peoples is somewhat offensive at the least

[Except to the Indians themselves. What they really hate is the PC term, "Native Americans."]

It's best to ask them what they personally prefer. Most I know personally prefer Indian.

[BINGO! The truth is out. I learned this at Friendship, Indiana one summer. They had an Indian craft festival there and if you looked carefully most of the "Indian crafts" were made in China. Plus the "Indians" didn't look a bit Indian...except for one guy who really was Indian. He was making some leather crafts so I carefully commented to him in a PC way that it was great to finally see some authentic "Native American" crafts at the festival. He stopped what he was doing, gave me a dirty look, and said, "We NEVER use that term. We call ourselves INDIANS." Since that day, I have complied and call them what they want to be called...Indians.]

More importantly, why DON'T we celebrate Leif Eriksson Day?

[A DUmmie wants to turn over a new Leif.]

I believe his original Old Norse name was Leifur Eriksson, pronounced "LAY-voor"

[I got it! First Monday of September we have a holiday honoring him. LAY-voor Day.]

Chris accidently found this continent while looking for China, so I'm not sure what we should call Oct. 11th.

[The Day Before Columbus Day?]

Many theorize that syphilis mutated from yaws, a disease prevalent in Europe.

[After hearing about Monica Lewinsky, I have theorized that it mutated from jaws.]

because the Italians have a stronger lobby than the Scandinavians! I guess cement shoes are scarier than Lutefisk.

[I dunno, I've heard some scary things about Lutefisk.]

The Italian lobby in the US has consistently opposed formal recognition of any pre-Columbian contact between Europe and America.

[Take that, Latvians!]

10 Comments:

Blogger paul mitchell said...

Columbus found this hemisphere and the subsequent continents while looking for China, therefore when he hit what he thought was China, he called the inhabitants, INDIANS.

Man, DU is getting dumber and dumber. I didn't think that was possible.

9:44 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"The DUmmies have followed this tradition this year as could be expected. Hey, DUmmies!" PJinc

*Yawn*

12:26 AM  
Anonymous DumbAss Tanker said...

Well, there are really two salient reasons:

1. A lot of different groups and people discovered the Americas before Columbus reached their outer islands, true; all of those led to exactly nothing except footnotes in forgotten musty archives. The voyages of Columbus were massively consequential (For good and ill) which cannot be said of any of the others who went before.

2. Despite failing to reach China, the entire enterprise is a glowing illustration of a man with a dream, using the best technical knowledge of his day to overcome resistance and superstition to achieve something, even if what he achieved was not what he originally set out to do, and so it strikes a special chord in the American spirit and speaks to us in a way the ultimate long-term failure to matter of all the predecessor enterprises does not.

8:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"The Italian lobby in the US has consistently opposed..."

Wait, what Italian lobby?

9:14 AM  
Blogger Lazarus Long said...

"Wait, what Italian lobby?"

The one with all the marble and the thick plastic on the furniture.

10:46 AM  
Anonymous Britt said...

Whenever liberals talk about history it's worth a laugh. They insist on stamping their worldview onto people who lived hundreds of years ago, and reinterpreting historical events to fit leftist conceptions of reality.

1:06 PM  
Anonymous Elrond Hubbard said...

Poor, politically incorrect, Chris; the deadest of all the dead white men.

1:16 PM  
Blogger Aishah Bowron said...

I hope Leif Eriksson Day is still around when Columbus Day becomes extinct and abolished and Cristoforo Colombo becomes completely obscure and forgotten. I hate the genocidal Christopher Columbus who killed and stole land and gold from the native Americans !. The Genoese sailor made a foolish mistake of calling the natives Indian and he went to his deathbed and finally to his grave stubbornly believing he had discovered the East Indies !. I prefer the Viking adventurer Leif Eriksson and he is a much better explorer than Christopher Columbus !. Leif Eriksson is the real and rightful discoverer of America Who discovered Newfoundland in Canada while CHris is a fraud and a usurper who only reached a few tiny islands in the Caribbean. Leif Eriksson is the best !.. Christopher Columbus sucks !.

5:41 AM  
Blogger paul mitchell said...

^^Useful idiot.^^

7:10 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm sorry that denouncing Columbus as the originator of the Native American genocide, the largest genocide in all of human history, is not original or interesting enough to be noteworthy criticism. What's it like having no conscience? Must be easy to justify ignoring the suffering of others. Man, you've got it made!

3:56 AM  

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