Saturday, April 25, 2009

Head DUmmie Skinner takes charge of his asylum!

SOMEBODY SHOOK UP THE ANTS!!! Who is the somebody who did the shaking? None other than Head DUmmie Skinner. How shook up are they? 650 replies in the first 12 hours! And what are they shook up about? Skinner trying to lay down some rules about criticizing The One, Obamassiah, as we see here in this MONSTER THREAD, "A few people have expressed confusion about what is permitted here now that Obama is president."

Poor Skinner. Somebody has to try to control the DUmmies, I guess, but that's a little like herding cats. Cats with ADD and Tourette's Syndrome. And Skinner--well, he's a little passive and he tends to let the inmates run the asylum. Recall the Andy Stephenson Situation. Recall Pitt's Fitzmas "scoop" and his repeated drunken rants and subsequent recantations.

Out-of-control DUmmies may make Skinner's life miserable, but it makes for LOADS OF LAFFS here at DUmmie FUnnies! Hours of entertainment! So pull up a chair and gaze upon our DUmmie Ant Farm, in Fire Ant Red, while the commentary of your humble correspondent, Charles Henrickson, eager to see franksolich's reaction to his fellow alum "getting tough" and "taking charge," is in the [Barackets]:

A few people have expressed confusion about what is permitted here now that Obama is president.

[More than a few people have expressed confusion about what is permitted in DUmmieland ever since Skinner opened the joint.]

As always... Please read my entire message before you respond.

[No way! Try to stop me!]

After eight long years of loyal opposition. . . .

["LOYAL" opposition?? Looney opposition is more like it. Rabid opposition. BDS-deranged opposition. But not "loyal" opposition.]

After eight long years of loyal opposition to the Worst President Ever. . . .

[Lyndon Johnson was President for only five years.]

Democratic Underground is experiencing some minor growing pains now that Barack Obama is president.

[Democratic Understatement.]

the DU administrators did not want to make any precipitous declarations about What It All Means for Democratic Underground.

[What It All Means is that Skinner et al. don't like to make decisions.]

I think we now have a pretty good idea of what DU looks like with a Democratic president: It looks like Democratic Underground has always looked.

[Which is, KRAAAA-ZY!!!]

We have a wide range of people, sharing a wide range of opinions, in ways that are interesting, irritating, smart, dumb, exciting, funny, insightful, friendly, or just plain rude.

[I vote for DUmb.]

And the way we enforce the rules isn't going to change much either. . . .

[It will stay ENTIRELY RANDOM.]

some of our members have been peddling the ridiculous and false assertion that criticism of Barack Obama is not permitted . . . .

[Where did such a ridiculous and false assertion come from?? I mean, besides all those tombstones dotting the landscape.]

Nonetheless, if anyone is confused about what is permitted here, I'll . . .

[. . . make it even more confusing.]

* Any and all substantive criticism of Barack Obama and his policies is permitted. And by "any and all substantive criticism" we mean all of it -- no issue is off limits.

* Expressions of dismay, disappointment or disagreement with Barack Obama or his policies are permitted.

* But insults, name-calling, or other expressions of contempt toward Barack Obama or his supporters are not welcome.

[So none of that "loyal opposition" stuff you showed the last guy.]

Even if you don't agree with President Obama on a number of issues, I guess I kinda thought that everyone here would consider themselves -- on some level -- to be among his supporters. . . . I didn't think that any DUer would want to deliberately use the same type of language one would expect to hear from tea-baggers and Freepers.

[I didn't expect the bloody Freeper Erudition!]

If you believe there are any issues on which you are not permitted to criticize Barack Obama (or any Democrat) please post in this thread and tell me . . .

[. . . and I will immediately give you a granite cookie.]

I want to be absolutely clear . . .

[. . . as mud.]

This does not mean "anything goes" for those DUers who defend him from criticism. Indeed, we have knee-jerk bullies on all sides of this issue.

[Jerks all around. Well, thanx, Skinner. That was . . . swell. Now let's hear from your subjects. . . .]

Do you sometimes feel like you are operating a sandbox for preschoolers?

[Or an ant farm for fire ants?]

I just want to say that the last week or so I have noticed a real improvement.

[People are realizing Obama REALLY IS a radical anti-American Marxist! So everything is copasetic.]

I just know that when I go to the Greatest page it's not filled with Obama bashing threads.

[All the Obama bashers have been tombstoned.]

This board also acts as a Democratic think tank. . . .

[Hee! Hee! "Democratic think tank"!!]

DU had become worse than Fox for a bit. . . .

[The quick-frown DU jumped over the lazy Fox.]

"Obama's administration is a failure already. Obama endorses torture. Obama is a militarist."

[Barack McSame.]

If as someone upthread lamented a bunch of lefties departed, I can't say I'm upset (even though as a "leftie" I don't think they represented the rational left). There are places for them to post, like maybe some socialist workers party website.

[DU is the socialist NON-workers website.]

There was no lie. There was no Obama-bashing. There was no dishonesty. There are, however, in YOUR post, ugly unfounded accusations and name calling because you didn't check your facts.

[Children, CHILDREN! Skinner, get in there and take charge!]

{ * crickets * }

[Skinner takes charge.]

How bout an OP that is attacked by a swarm of "know betters than thou". . . . hat poster presumed to take an OP of mine, LINK it to another forum,. EDIT IT AND PRESENT IT AS WHAT I WAS SAYING, AS IF THAT POSTER KNEW BETTER THAN THE OP, IN A BLATANT AND MOBSWARM EFFORT TO ATTACK ONE FORUM AND BUILD THE UNCHECKDED POWER OF ANOTHER.


When forums attack!


We should never be calling for "shouting down" anyone, ever.


In your opinion, and solely your opinion - unsupported and undefended - certain people deserve to be brow-beaten.

[Paging Susan Boyle. . . .]

Curious: why do you need to shout?


I get the feeling that a disagreement is in order no matter what point you make or how calmly you state it.

[It's the DUmmie Way.]

We have 2 DU's.

[3, and your license gets suspended.]

Can't we all just get along?


DU is first a community and it's a pretty amazing and responsive one.

[DU is first a comedy and it's a pretty amusing and obsessive one.]

What nonsense.


It's Insulting.


Would I be one of the people who you think should post on "National Socialist party websites" or who is a "knuckledragger straight out of Rush's butt?"

[Yo, SKINNER!!!]

{ * crickets * }

[Skinner clamps down on the chaos.]

this reply is a perfect example of a violation of what skinner just posted.

[And thus a perfect example of Skinner standing by and doing nothing.]

If people are faux-offended by a declaration of "Nonsense!" though, then they are far too delicate flowers for the rambunctious meadow that is DU.

["Rambunctious meadow" or "steaming DUnghill"?]

What "crap" was here and what "crap" was gone. . . ?

[Crap circles.]

I guess you must think that all of the effort from Skinner and the mods that has gone into this thread today to clarify policy, is a big joke perhaps?

[Not "perhaps." For sure!]

The negativity here has different origins. One is just trolls.

[Not "just" trolls. LOUSY FREEPER TROLLS!!!]

more negativity isn't the answer. . . . That just leads to a dwindling spiral of More.

[More crap circles.]

Not everyone who gets the axe is a troll. . . . Some are overly emotional, stupid, drunk, stoned, rude, or unmedicated Democrats and/or progressives. . . .

[If all the overly emotional, stupid, drunk, stoned, rude, or unmedicated Democrats and/or progressives got tombstoned, there wouldn't be anybody left.]

You made a big, honking ASSumption, based on the stuff in your own head, about what you thought I meant.


You seem to be upset. You're responding to other posters with words like f*ck, ASSumption, all caps, exclamation points, and other heavily-loaded terms.


I can only "ass" ume (and yes, I used that ass word, so shoot me! My intent is to suggest that you make an ass of yourself. . . .

[ S K I N N E R ! ! ! ]

{ * crickets * }

[Skinner: "Present."]

these blanket attacks. . . .

[Skinner clutches his blanket and sucks his thumb.]

You are talking about fellow DUers and progressives as though you were in charge of pest control here, and that your opponents were some sort of vermin to be eliminated.

[DU: Putting the "rats" in "Democrats."]

You . . . are being incredibly rude, snarky, nasty and accusatory towards me. . . . You are so far off the mark that your comments border on a dullard's fantasy--is that clear enough for you? You can't get away with insulting me and not get a little crack back, pal.

[Boy, Skinner's lecture did a lot of good, didn't it?]

I could give a flying f*ck if people come back under new identities, so long as they don't repeat their anti-social behavior that got them tombstoned in the first place. YOU--not me--are the one with the "vermin" in your head. YOU--not me--are being ugly, divisive and unwarranted.

[Peace and love. Peace and love. Ommmmmmmm. . . . .]

Pretty obvious that you are "talking sh*t." Shame on you. You're "asparagus casting". . . .

[Give peas a chance.]

Even the MOST contrary on DU can't hold a candle to the obnoxiousness of a 7th grader!

[Are You Smart-assier Than a 7th Grader?]

Thanks, Skinner. Can we have threads about chicken in the Lounge again?

[A chicken in every post.]

I personally think it's kind of silly to generalize Obama and the new admin after such a short time. Snap the fingers/change the world just isn't going to happen.

[You're Obama-bashing! LOCK! BAN! DELETE!]

I voted for Obama. And I will criticize him all I want. As should everyone who voted for him. He promised us change. We demand it.


Does this mean that DU will enforce violations of the name-calling rule?

[Hell, no, you stupid git!]

Yes, we -- the moderators and administrators -- are going to do what we can.

[Skinner speaks! Finally. And does nothing.]

I was called a teabagger the other day.

[Wouldn't EarlG be a teabagger, by definition?]

I was called a drooling ignoramus. . . .

[Not specific enough on DU.]

Why the f*ck did I ever take you off of ignore?

[Why can't I get over you?]

Skinner, you know that I self-identify as gay. . . .

[Sorry, I don't think Skinner rolls that way. Although sometimes I'm not sure.]

Skinner, your board is becoming a refuge for homophobes, racists, antisemites, and right-wing trolls.

[Yes! And hilarity ensues!]

The good ship DU is listing badly and taking on water.

[Water boarding!]

Just call it a hunch... But after a short respite, I fear things will deteriorate again.

[You are a regular Nostradamus! You can never go wrong betting on renewed deterioration in DUmmieland!]

Rachel Maddow, a gay American, used the "poutrage" word on tee vee. . . . It's not a gay-bashing term, and to try to cram it into that box doesn't fly.

[Uh, you may want to re-think "try to cram it into a box" when talking about the homos.]

I wish everyone here would realize that Obama is human. . . .

[Wha-a??? He's HUMAN??]

They post with impunity because there are no consequences.

[Kewpie Doll material right there.]

people who thought that Obama was "faking it" during the election, just to get elected, and once he got in the White House, he was going to put on his Che tee shirt, grow his hair and get a blowout kit, take to the microphone and scream "Fight the POWAH, you muthaf*ckas!!!" while legalizing pot (planting some on the WH lawn, of course), appointing Kucinich as Gates' replacement, providing free housing and a no-work stipend for everyone, mandating books made of hemp in the public schools, dragging every registered Republican to the courts to be tried for war crimes....etc., etc. and so forth.

[Well, short of Kookcinich getting appointed, that's pretty close to what's happened.]

God made me do it. Even though I don't believe in God.

[God-bashing is still perfectly permitted in DUmmieland. In fact, it's a requirement.]

frankly your characterization is Rovian. . . .

[Ruh roh! Them's fightin' words!]

That's Rovian.

[That's So Rovian!]

Then one could easily describe you as Rovian.

[It's a Perfect Rovian Swarm!]

Some people just like throwing rocks. Thanks, Shinner.

[Will Pitt weighs in--Will, who has thrown plenty of rocks from his glass house. Oh, and by the way, Will, it's "Skinner," not "Shinner." Slur your words much?]

We can't post about chicken. You should have heard what they caled the cornflake partisans.

[I should have.]

Chicken is okay. Cornflakes are not.

[Of course.]

Wow, late to the party. Pass the popcorn.

[No cornflakes though.]

it is possible for someone to be a Democrat and still be a mean-spirited asshole. I've seen it up close. . . .

[Is that you, benburch?]

some comments about his performance are so dire and inflammatory that one would figure that he's ready to barbecue Bo on the White House lawn. . . .

[Mmm. . . . Tastes like chicken! And chicken is okay!]

I'm quite sure even Obama's wife does not agree with him on everything, all the time.

[Barbecuing Bo, for example.]

Thank Goddess, and thanks, Skinner!

[Praise you, Gaia!]

I thought for a while there DU was going to become Freeper Bizarro World!

[Freeper Bizarro World am good!]

I'm just glad I have a place where I can still call George Bush a g*dd*m sh*t-stain of a f*ck-knobbed d**che-bag.

[BDS: The glue that binds DU together. Some things will never change!]

How many little flame warettes in just this thread by the boss? . . . Nya nay. Neener neener. Pppppppfffffffttttt. Blalalalalala. "I know you are, but what am I?" "I'm rubber, you're glue ...... " "Oh yeah????" "So's yer old lady"

[That about sums it up. Welcome to the New DU! Thanx, Skinner!]


Anonymous Smitty said...

The Skinner Box, where America's Pol Pot wannabes frolic.

4:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

There are a few too many inside baseball references for a newbie to dummiefunnies to understand it all, but this is a hilarious post!

4:53 PM  
Anonymous Anon 1:50 said...

...and this group pretends to guide the left's political thinking?

They couldn't plan a picnic.

7:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This board also acts as a Democratic think tank. . . .Ok, first of all I laugh at that, and second, I thought it was Democrat, not Democratic. Don't DUmmies get their panties in a bind when it is referred to as the Democratic Party? And this is a think tank?

9:32 AM  
Blogger Jinx McHue said...

Any and all substantive criticism of Barack Obama and his policies is permitted.And who, pray tell, decides whether something is "substantive" or not? Seems pretty arbitrary to me.

9:40 AM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

Anon 1:50 said...
...and this group pretends to guide the left's political thinking?

They couldn't plan a picnic.
Which perfectly explains why the Federal Government is doing such a lousy job. The Moonbats in that thread are in charge...never forget that. And sadly we have four years of unbridled lunacy to deal with.

10:41 AM  
Blogger Tazzerman said...

I'm laughing so hard I can't type, tears are streaming from my eyes and my sides are about to split wide open.. OMG!!!

Now all we need it Trog to come and put the cherry on top of this post..

3:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

After eight long years of loyal opposition. . . .I couldn't stop laughing after that line. Great issue Charles!

3:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This board also acts as a Democratic think tank. .Now THERE is an oxymoron

11:57 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

Big Fat Cherry.

"Poor Skinner. Somebody has to try to control the DUmmies, I guess, but that's a little like herding cats. Cats with ADD and Tourette's Syndrome." P Jinc

Anybody looked at the polls lately? I, troglaman, guess about 68% of the country now qualify as a herd of cats with ADD and Tourette's Syndrom. Sure.

You assholes are just fucking crazy. That's all there is to it. Fess the fuck up.

2:31 AM  
Anonymous Adam said...

Trog, even if a majority of Americans support Obama or voted for him, Most of them are not the psycho DUmmmies PJ was referring to in his post, he was just referring to the lunatics that infest the DUmp with his "Cats with ADD and Tourette's Syndrome" comment.

7:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Adam, regardless of how many times it is pointed out to Troggy, he can never seem to remember this site is primarily about DUmmies.

Stop trying. You'd have a better chance of success in polishing a turd.

7:14 AM  
Anonymous Classic Liberal said...

Actually, anybody who supports Obama's irrational, incompetent, parasitic, totalitarian administration could be described as either stupid as a box of rocks, or a psychotic.

10:18 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Adam, regardless of how many times it is pointed out to Troggy, he can never seem to remember this site is primarily about DUmmies." He-who-must-not-be-named.

Au contraire, my nameless friend. This site's all about you.

2:30 AM  

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