DUmmies Deeply Saddened By Saddam's Impending Execution

(Note: Our DUFU endorsed presidential candidate, Tom Vilsack, will be appearing in Ketchum, Idaho today at Hemingway Elementary School between 4 and 5:15. If you attend his speech, please encourage Gov. Vilsack to WEAR THE BEAR. You can also visit the Tom Vilsack campaign WEBSITE and encourage him to do the same there. If Vilsack follows our advice and Wears the Bear, his campaign is sure to take off.)

This isn't really a surprise to me but the DUmmies are deeply saddened by the impending execution of Saddam Hussein as you can see in both this THREAD titled, "TV plans tasteful coverage of Saddam execution," and this THREAD titled, "God I hope that Saddam finds a way to kill himself before they hang him." Contrast these feelings of humanitarianism towards a mass murderer to the recent DUmmie INVECTIVE hurled at the recently deceased Gerald Ford. Yes, the DUmmies engage in all sorts of furty and hate directed towards Republicans such as imprisoning George Bush as a war criminal and sending him to The Hague but for a real slime like Saddam, there is only sympathy in DUmmieland. So let us now watch the DUmmies shed leftwing tears for Saddam in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, already anticipating the DUmmie outbreak of grief when Castro kicks the bucket, is in the [brackets]:

TV plans tasteful coverage of Saddam execution

[Translation: You will have to watch the actual hanging on the Web.]

NEW YORK (Hollywood Reporter) - Television networks face a killer of a conundrum with the impending execution of Saddam Hussein, whose hanging could be videotaped and perhaps aired on Iraqi TV....

[I'll be watching but I guess it won't be on the networks since I doubt they will show the actual hanging.]

ABC and CBS said they wouldn't air the full execution if the video became available....Phil Alongi, special-events executive producer at NBC News, said there are ways the network can approach the video or photographs that will get the point across without having to be graphic.

[God forbid that we actually see a mass murderer get his just reward.]

The operative word: taste.

[The operative word: censorship.]

"We have very, very strict guidelines with how to deal with that," said Bob Murphy, senior vp at ABC News. "If there were pictures made available of the execution, they would have to be viewed by senior management before we would put them on the air, and we would make a judgment of taste and propriety of what we would show."

[Yadda Yadda Yadda. Same dopey excuses for the networks no longer showing us images of the Twin Towers collapsing from the terrorist attack.]

CNN and Fox News Channel still were discussing what they would do if the footage were made available. It also wasn't clear what the newly launched network Al-Jazeera International would do. An e-mail and phone call to the channel's Qatar headquarters weren't returned Thursday. Despite popular assumptions to the contrary, Al-Jazeera's pan-Arab channel has never shown an execution.

[Is that the same CNN that has no problem with airing terrorist videos of snipers shooting American troops?]

While video of an execution would be unprecedented in U.S. television, the war in Iraq has led to a number of judgment calls on graphic video. The U.S. military released graphic photographs of Saddam's two sons who were killed in a U.S. raid on their Mosul hideout in July 2003.

"We edited down the pictures to show only what was appropriate, what we thought was appropriate," Murphy said. "We didn't show the pictures live (when the network received them), and we made sure that they showed enough of the bodies so that it was clearly them, but we didn't dwell on it."...

[CNN thought it was appropriate to show American soldiers being shot but somehow thinks it is in poor taste to show mass murderer Saddam being executed. And now to hear from the DUmmies in the PeaNUt Gallery.]

Sick f*cks ... I guess everyone has forgotten that the propriety of Capital punishment is ITSELF questionable ..... I am supposing they have moved beyond that question .... A BUNCH of sick f*cks ...

[How much do you want to bet that the total energy this same DUmmie has spent previously condemning the crimes of Saddam Hussein is somewhere between nil and none?]

My sentiments exactly. I hope one of his jailers gives him a pill before his execution. I will take great delight in robbing the sick souls who want to see this hanging. It's like these people are wearing white sheets and hoods and standing around a tree in MS or AL in the 40' and 50's.

[Thanx for that image of poor Saddam as the innocent victim of a lynching.]

It stuns me that Americans think that this is justice

[The same DUmmies who call for Bush to be sent to The Hague to be tried as a war criminal.]

Me too. They are slow coming to the truth. This is a W execution on a foreign being. W will answer.

[That sounds like a threat, DUmmie Erika. I repeat, DUmmie Erika.]

It's only justice if Bush is hanging next to him.

[Another threat from DUmmie 6000eliot. I repeat, DUmmie 6000eliot.]

Thank You. I was just too afraid to say it myself.

[Support for a threat from DUmmie 951-Riverside. I repeat, DUmmie 951-Riverside.]

Tasteful execution. Jesus. What have we become? I have been looking for the comparison figures on how many Iraqis Saddam killed, versus how many have died in Bush's illegal war.

[Much fewer in the latter unless you believe bogus numbers which you do.]

Personally, I think they should play it live on every channel. I love the smell of justice in the morning. But then, what do I know? I'm just a crazy wingnut. By the way, great moniker, you guys. It has a kind of dramatic flair....

[Caught this post from a LOUSY FREEPER TROLL before it could be deleted and now on to God I hope that Saddam finds a way to kill himself before they hang him. ]

God I hope that Saddam finds a way to kill himself before they hang him. steal their thunder I say.

[That's what the neo-nazis were hoping for Herman Goring when he beat the Nuremburg hangman with a bit of cyanide.]

I'd rather just hope that they don't hang him.

[You prefer that they tickle Saddam for his crimes?]

I think it must help them sleep at night to pretend the thousands of murders committed in their names were based on something tangible. Christians my ass, I hate the whole lying lot of those assholes.

[Note the total LACK of condemnation for Saddam's many murderous crimes.]

I'm not into this whole hanging thing.

[Unless the condemned is an EVIL Republican.]

I would rather see Saddam live to testify in Bush's war crimes trial. I imagine this is why Saddam received such a speedy trial, sentence, rejected appeal, and execution date set before congress changes hands.

[Oh, and don't forget to pardon Saddam for his cooperation in the Bush war crimes trial at The Hague.]

This hanging is nothing more than the entire civilized world getting medieval on Saddam's ass.

[They just don't understand the modern progressive ways of Saddam.]

I can hardly think about it....discuss it... I feel like our entire society has become the mob that would sell postcards of a lynching... I feel so damned nauseated. But yes, if it comes down to it, I wish Saddam would act to "steal their thunder" too.

[Saddam, We Hardly Knew Ye.]

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DUmmies Dance On Gerald Ford's Grave

According to the DUmmies, if you are a Republican you are automatically demonic. When I heard this morning that former President Gerald Ford had passed away, I figured the DUmmies would praise Ford as a way to slam Bush. Wrong. The DUmmie HATE of all things Republicans extends even to those of the most non-threatening sort such as Gerald Ford as you can see in this crazed THREAD titled, "Stop trying to tell me Gerald Ford was a good, decent man." So let us now watch the demonic DUmmies dance on Gerald Ford's grave in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, watching DUmmies acting like DUmmies, is in the [brackets]:

Stop trying to tell me Gerald Ford was a good, decent man.

[Stop trying to tell me DUmmies are sane.]

Gerald R. Ford, the greatest enabler in American history, is being lionized tonight. I read post after post parroting all the right-wing talking points about him. Come on, you know them by heart; decent man, accidental president, ended our long national nightmare, lovable stumble bum. I'm calling bullshit.

Ford is the guy who pardoned the evil bastard Nixon (he also pardoned Tokyo Rose, for you Freeper lurkers.) Richard Fucking Milhous Nixon, for Christ's sake. The drunken, power-mad narcissist who claimed to have "a secret plan to end the Viet Nam War" and subsequently sent thousands of Americans to needless death and trauma. Does this sound familiar? How would you feel if George W. Bush were similarly pardoned by say, Chuck Hagel? It could happen.



[It could happen that DUmmie Steve_DeShazer might grow a brain but it probably won't happen.]

It's hard to see DUer's here praise Oatmeal Man as 'the last decent Republican President', 'an impeccable, honorable man', 'a simple and good man'. And on and on. Don't insult me and the other guys my age who were faced with being drafted into the military debacle of our generation by telling us that the guy who pardoned this criminal president, who escalated the war beyond all sense of proportion, "ended our long national nightmare".

[DUmmie Steve_DeShazer needs a history lesson. Vietnam peace accords signed early in 1973 BEFORE Ford became President and U.S. forces left in April 1975 early in the Ford Presidency. As to the draft, it was over by then.]

Hell, this nightmare continues today, far worse than my 1974 self could ever imagine. May I set the record straight?

[Perhaps you should set your head right first.]

First, Ford's pardon of Nixon did not 'heal the nation'. It halted any investigation of the crimes of Richard Nixon. Further, it established a precedent that was continued by George H. W. Bush, who pardoned the likes of Caspar Weinberger and described him as "true American patriot" and said clemency was granted both to spare him torment and cost of lengthy legal proceedings. Must be nice.

[And unlike the Clinton pardons at the end of his presidency, there was no remuneration in exchange.]

Second, Ford advanced the bloodthirsty careers of no less than Henry Kissinger, Richard Cheney, and Donald Rumsfeld. These guys belong in a war crimes tribunal. Their boss was a good Republican? My ass.

[Dr. Buddy Rydell suggests you STOP what you are doing and sing "I Feel Pretty" as part of your Anger Management Program.]

Third, Ford gave the green light to Indonesia's illegal invasion of East Timor, resulting in up to 200,000 DEAD PEOPLE.

[He also gave the green light to numerous earthquakes. Continue...]

Fourth, the Project for a New American Century, and the resulting fall and decline of America's standing in the 21st century would never have happened without Ford's unholy deal with his evil f*cking boss (see #2.)

[P-NACing, Mr. Pinnell? P-NACing?]

I could go on, but the attention span of the Ford supporters here likely won't cover the thirty-plus years of hell and repetition of history that have resulted in PNAC, because in case you haven't noticed, ALL THESE PNAC'ers are the SAME F*CKING GUYS THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN INVESTIGATED AND PERMANENTLY DISCREDITED had Mr. Nice Guy Gerry not PARDONED Richard Milhous Nixon for all his crimes, which today remain uninvestigated.

[PNAC!!! SLOOOOOOWLY I TURNED... STEP BY STEP...]

The 'liberal media' will go all-out in the coming days rewriting history to make Gerald Ford out as the second coming of Jesus. As far as I'm concerned, Gerald Ford is the first coming of the ridiculous notion that America could dominate the world at gunpoint.

[Oh yeah. We all remember how Ford's Wehrmacht rolled over Saigon and Angola.]

Fu*ck that.

[Open wide for the powerful meds and let us now hear from your equally medicated fellow DUmmies...]

Amen to that. To find a Republican president who was a decent man you'd have to go back a lot further.

[Definitely before warmonger Eisenhower.]

Ford's role in covering up the crimes of that era gave those evil monsters more time. And what we see today is his legacy. The same players, the same goals, and the same results. May he rot in hell for his cowardice and complicity.

[Your mind has already rotted quite nicely right here.]

Bullshit indeed. And dangerous, destructive bullshit at that. The GOP-owned-and-operated corporate media talking heads and newspaper writers will be carrying on and on. It's ridiculous to add still MORE bullshit to their output.

[The biggest BS is your notion of a "GOP-owned-and-operated corporate media."]

It PISSES me off so much. To know that Tricky Dick, an evil bastard, got pardoned... damn, WTF?

[Somehow I have the feeling that this DUmmie will be deeply saddened by the execution of Saddam Hussein.]

F*ck the rivisionists! The guy was an EVIL MOTHERF*CKER who sent many innocent Americans to death for war profits. F*ck him and the bunch who rode in with him. 'm glad he is dead! I only wish he suffered more!

[This crazed DUmmie will definitely be mourning the death of Saddam Hussein. Bookmark the name of DUmmie tmfun so we can check back in a few weeks.]

I will not be mourning this man.Wonder what it costs we, the people, to bury one of these men?

[It already cost you all of your sanity.]

You make a good argument to support John Dean's reasons why those surrounding Bush should get impeached, so they can't grow up to be just like him. Let's purge them out now while we can.

[A DUmmie Chekhist urging on the Purge Trials.]

I remember all that shit goin' down, and I can hold a grudge for decades.

[Keep holding that grudge so as to maintain your current level of insanity.]

But Tokyo Rose was actually innocent. NPR did a long piece about it.

[Who will pardon all the current journalists supporting the terrorists?]

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DUmmie FUnnies Endorses Presidential Candidate

After deep discussions, the editorial board of the DUmmie FUnnies consisting of myself and LI'L BEAVER has decided to endorse a presidential candidate. The candidate was NOT selected because of our agreement with him on policy issues. In fact, there is little upon which we agree politically with this liberal candidate. Instead, our primary consideration was how the endorsement would HELP the DUmmie FUnnies. Therefore this automatically eliminated a host of candidates such as Hillary, Obama, Kerry, and Edwards. See, they already have sufficient support that any endorsement by the DUmmie FUnnies would be a mere drop in the bucket and we would get NO credit for their rise in the polls. Many have thought that the DUmmie FUnnies would endorse Dennis Kucinich. Wrong again. Kookcinich has a small but strong ultra-liberal base of support so an endorsement by the DUmmie FUnnies would be rejected plus given no credit for any rise in the popularity of the Evil Elf.

This leaves candidates of the bottom tier of the Democrats. Candidates whose ratings are so low that the DUmmie FUnnies could receive credit for any increase in their currently miniscule ratings. This would include candidates such as Joe Biden, Chris Dodd, and Bill Richardson. However, even these candidates are still too well known for the DUmmie FUnnies to really get credit for helping.

This leaves one standout candidate whose poll numbers are currently so low that he does not even qualify to be in the bottom tier of candidates. In fact he is doing so poorly in the polls that he is now beneath the bottom of the bottom tier of candidates. And this candidate, who is doing poorly enough to earn the DUmmie FUnnies endorsement is none other than...Tom Vilsack!

Not only does the DUmmie FUnnies endorse (for Democrat nomination only) Tom Vilsack but we have a plan on how he can drastically increase his poll numbers. This plan came to me whenever I thought about Governor Vilsack. And the very few times I did think about him I always conjured up the image of him wearing the Pooh Bear on his head. I admit that at first I MOCKED Governor Vilsack for daring to wear that Pooh Bear in public. However, the more I thought about it, the more I admired him for having the GUTS and confidence in himself to wear it. And this led me to the KEY to how Tom Vilsack can rise in the polls---Wear the Pooh Bear (and other furry critters) whenever he makes a speech in public. Yes, a lot of folks will laugh at him at first as I did but guess what? He will get a lot of ATTENTION as a result. The first result of wearing furry critters when making speeches is that those speeches will be uploaded and WATCHED on YouTube. As it stands now, folks just won't watch Vilsack make his speeches in any great numbers. However, wear the bear and Vilsack would become an instant HIT on YouTube.

Yes, yes. I know that Vilsack and would be initially reluctant to subject himself to possible ridicule. Well, let me introduce everybody to another candidate who took a chance at being ridiculed. He was a fairly unknown state legislator who wanted to become a United States Senator from a large state. He came up with the idea of walking around the periphery of the state to raise public awareness of himself. At first his walking "stunt" was written off by the pundits as just a silly gimmick. However, a funny thing happened. The more this candidate did his walking tour campaign, the more press coverage he received. And the more press he recieved the more folks wanted to meet him on his walking tour of the state. Eventually, his name became so familiar to the state's voters due to his walking "stunt" that he was elected as U.S. Senator. His name, if you haven't guessed yet, was Walkin' Lawton Chiles.

I am therefore proposing that Governor Vilsack consider using the Pooh Bear that he has already worn and use it again and again (along with other furry critter dolls) in his campaign. Speak about war, economy, immigration, health, and a whole host of other issues and few will pay attention. However speak on the same issues wearing a furry critter on your head, Governor Vilsack, and MANY will watch. I guarantee it.

Prior to making this endorsement I sort of test marketed the name of Vilsack by asking about 3 dozen people if they had ever heard that name. With one exception none of them had heard of Vilsack. And the one exception was a woman who claimed that she had a jar of pickles by that name in her refrigerator.

Tom Vilsack, your primary opponents aren't Hillary or Obama or Edwards or Kerry or a whole host of other candidates. Your REAL opponents are the myriad of products being pitched constantly to enter the attention span of the average person. Those are your real opponents that daily assault people via ads and commercials. Kentucky Fried Chicken, Apocalypto, Playstation 3, Caribbean Cruises, Verizon phone plans, K-Mart, FAO Schwarz, Nike, Delta Sky Miles, and, yes, Vlasic Pickles. The only way you can break through this competition to claim a piece of the limited attention span of the voters is to do something drastic. And this something is what I have suggested---WEAR THE BEAR!

Now since the DUmmie FUnnies is known as an "vicious rightwing blog" why should you, a Democrat candidate, take advice from me? Simple. The better you do in the polls from using our suggestion, the better it is for the DUmmie FUnnies since we gave you the idea. I see this as an ideal win/win situation. The better you do in the polls, the better the DUmmie FUnnies does.

Just so you know I am not a complete crackpot, I do have a history of giving some very successful advice to one of the biggest companies in the world. PayPal. It happened in January 2000. Amazingly, PayPal at that time was merely oriented towards using its service primarily as a way to pay for restaurant bills via PDA devices in which a customer with a Palm Pilot would "beam" the payment to the Palm Pilot of the restaurant via PayPal. Very few people were using PayPal at that time because of this proposed limited use. Since I had a few items for sale on eBay, I did a search and discovered that only about a dozen auctions at that time were using PayPal. I thought this service would be perfect for buying and selling on eBay so I e-mailed PayPal with my idea. Shortly afterwards, I called up PayPal and pitched my idea about using PayPal auction banners to JACK SELBY who was then their Director of Marketing. After listening to my overenthusiastic pitch about the use of PayPal auction banners for eBay, Mr. Selby politely thanked me. I thought it was just a polite brushoff and so much for another one of my "crazy" ideas. However, I just couldn't let go so several days later I again called Jack Selby and told him that even though I might have come across as a nutcase, I still thought my idea had merit. At that point, Mr. Selby stopped me and told me he loved the idea and that PayPal had already instituted it. I couldn't believe it but it was true. PayPal used an idea proposed by YOURS TRULY and within a few months grew to such an extent as a result that it went from being used just on about a dozen eBay auctions to several hundred thousand auctions. So even though my idea about wearing the bear might seem crazy now, there is a method to my madness as you can see from the PayPal example.

I am therefore now urging that my DUmmie FUnnies readers visit your the Tom Vilsack campaign WEBSITE and express their support for the "Wear The Bear" plan. I will also be publishing in future editions of the DUmmie FUnnies, all the campaign appearances of Tom Vilsack so the DUmmie FUnnies fans can show up and give you their polite approval and encouragement to "WEAR THE BEAR!"

I understand, governor, your initial reaction of reluctance to accept this idea but when your poll numbers remain stagnant, you might want to reconsider. Wear The Bear and you will become an instant HIT on YouTube and your campaign will benefit. Don't worry about people laughing at you. When your poll numbers rise precipitously, people will be laughing WITH you.

This is my Christmas gift to you, Governor Vilsack. Even though I don't support your political views, I have presented you with what I believe will be an excellent method to move UP in the polls. And now, this special Presidential Campaign endorsement of the DUmmie FUnnies will finish up in its traditional manner. I will channel a leftwing skeptic who will question, in Bolshevik Red, the motivations of your humble correspondent whose response can be seen in the [brackets]:

Admit it. You only want Tom Vilsack to wear a Pooh Bear in public so he will look foolish.

[Vilsack has ALREADY worn that Pooh Bear in public. The only castigation he got for that was from me in a DUmmie FUnnies EDITION. The strange thing is, that despite my initial scorn, that image has been seared, seared into my mind whenever I think about Vilsack. I believe this is the way for Vilsack's named to be seared into a lot of other minds.]

You just want to turn Vilsack into a laughingstock in order to ruin his campaign.

[Your critique might have some validity if Vilsack were currently riding high in the polls. As it is, Vilsack has no where to go but up. People will laugh WITH Tom Vilsack when it turns out that wearing the bear works.]

You don't even agree with him politically so why should we believe anything you propose?

[I said I support him for the Democrat nomination. Since someone has to win that nomination, it might as well be someone who wins it as a result of advice from the DUmmie FUnnies. Good for Vilsack, good for us. Win/Win.]

You are just proposing a cheap publicity stunt.

[A "cheap publicity stunt" is what got Lawton Chiles elected a U.S. Senator from Florida in 1971. Oh, and Governor Vilsack can also wear mascot critters from the areas he is campaigning in. A Panther when in North Carolina or a Dolphin in South Florida. It wouldn't surprise me if kids drag their parents to his speeches just to watch the candidate wear an animal hat.]

Wouldn't YOU feel foolish if Tom Vilsack actually did win the nomination as the result of your suggestion?

[Actually I would feel GREAT. The DUmmie FUnnies would receive enormous acclaim for showing a fairly unknown candidate the method to win the Democrat nomination. As I stated before, someone is going to win that nomination and it might as well be someone that the DUmmie FUnnies gains the credit for. Win/Win.]

So you will support Tom Vilsack in the general election?

[Absolutely not. The support of the DUmmie FUnnies only runs up to the nomination. At that point, I would oppose Vilsack on political grounds although I would hope we would remain friends.]

And what if by some miracle Vilsack wins the nomination and the election as a result of your Animal Hat suggestion?

[Any Republican who loses to Tom Vilsack deserves to lose. Yeah, I would feel lousy about inadvertently making a Democrat president but the upside would be the DUmmie FUnnies (along with Vilsack) will come to the attention of the general public.]

Ha! Ha! So the joke would be on you if Tom Vilsack is elected president.

[I'll take that chance. And more reason for Vilsack to take the chance on wearing the Pooh Bear. Don't wear it and he is fated to remain just another in long line of obscure candidates. Wear it and Vilsack will instantly jump to the forefront of attention. And he shouldn't worry about being laughed at. He who laughs last, laughs best.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Christmas is coming soon I have the PERFECT Christmas gift item for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! So feel good about purchasing an AMERICAN MADE toy which makes the perfect Christmas or birthday gift. The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

When Steve Becomes Stephanie

Imagine you are at your place of employment and one day your co-worker, Steve, arrives dressed up as a woman called Stephanie. The normal reaction would be one of shock and embarrassment. In fact, if you didn't react this way, there would be something wrong with you. Well, a DUmmie did react this way and now feels she has to apologize to the world for her NORMAL reaction in this THREAD titled, "My most profound apologies to gay, transexual, transgender DUers." So let us now watch the DUmmies wrestle over their crossdressing feelings in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, still chuckling over how Richard Dawkins fell for Mr. Garrison in South Park, is in the [brackets]:

My most profound apologies to gay, transexual, transgender DUers

[For having a NORMAL reaction when a co-worker shows up at work with a changed sex.]

First off, forgive me if I use all the wrong words here. This is all new to me.

[You are forgiven DUmmie Rosemary2205. Continue with your comedy act...]

Today my workmate Steve came in dressed as a woman. I would like to report that except for a little 5:00 shadow he is a stunningly beautiful woman. But of course, it's a shock at first. What does one say, or do. Do I just ignore and call him Steve? We are "sortof" friends and tell each other a bit of personal information but this was totally unexpected. My prior expectation was that he is openly gay.

[What a shock. Before you thought he was merely gay. Now you find out he is a different sex. Continue...]

Appearantly our boss knew about this ahead. The boss came by and referred to Steve as Stephanie. My brain was about to explode. An hour ago Steve sit's with me in the cafeteria and tells me he's part male part female. He has female genitalia and a uterus. Well I don't want to get too graphic here...... the pain and agony he shared with me were astounding.

[So was this due to a sex change operation? You aren't being very helpful here.]

But here's the deal. I've always been on the fence about whether homosexuality, or transsexual, or bisexual or any of those "unnormal" things is chosen or genetic. Quite frankly it doesn't matter to me. Consenting adults don't need MY approval that's for darn sure. IMHO even if they chose it then who the heck cares. And quite frankly I've given the anti-gay people a wave off as being unbalanced nuts.

[While Steve/Stephanie is a balanced nut.]

But the standard line in the anti-gay community is "they chose it so they can unchoose it". Well, how in sam hell does someone choose IN THE WOMB? How can you tell a person like this that "God made a mistake" -- NO ONE IS A "MISTAKE". For the first time in my life I am seeing the phenomenal pain that we are inflicting on people with all the "defense of marriage" business. It's NOT harmless. People are committing suicide even because of the message our society is giving them.

[Maybe Steve/Stephanie should be a keynote speaker at the 2008 Democrat Convention.]

No one should go through life feeling they are nothing but a carnival side show. Everyone, EVERYONE deserves to have a sense of acceptance and love, no matter what "deformity" they are born with.

[The Elephant Man/Woman.]

I want to apologize. I did already to Steve. But also to the world at large. For my failure to stand up to these bullies. These disgusting bullies in America who are tearing apart people's lives with their anti-gay agenda. I will never ever wave them off as harmless assholes again.

[It's STEPHANIE you insensitive lout! And now to hear from the rest of your fellow DUmmies...]

That's a nice post. I agree with the other poster that you don't have to apologize, though. Continuing to be a an office friend to Stephanie, and using the name and identity that she requests that you use, is a wonderful way to put your beliefs into practice.

[Except that Rosemary2205 needs to apologive for calling Stephanie Steve. That was really insensitive.]

You are right. I need to refer to "her" as Stephanie even away from "her". I hope eventually in my head it's not "she" and "her" but just plain she and her. That might take some time though.

[Thank you for that insight, "Rosemary2205."]

God is love. It is probably hard for him also when those ignorant people rant "God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve"

[Or Adam and Stephanie.]

No apology needed. I would have thought he would have prepared y'all other than to just come in dressed as Stephanie all of a sudden, but what do I know.

[A phone call would have been helpful. Kind of insensitive for Steve not to call up his co-workers and let them know in advance that he will be showing up as Stephanie.]

I am a gay man, who first "came out" 15 years ago. I knew I "preferred men" long before this time, but basically remained celibate until the age of 28. I remember the first time I went to a gay bar, I parked 1/2 mile away, walked there, and had to wait 5 minutes for the streets to clear before I dashed in. Absolute paranoia. When I got in, one of the first folks I spoke to was Kenny, who everyone referred to as Julie. He was quite effeminate. My initial reaction to Julie was discomfort, I had a problem with the "It's so GORGEOUS" and other gay mannerisms. As time went on, I got to know Julie much better as a person, he was one of the warmest and most decent people I ever met. We all work at overcoming our pre-conceived notions and baser instincts.

[I thought everyone referred to Kenny as Keisha but what do I know.]

It sounds by your post like this person is intersex...

[Is that beyond metrosex?]

What is also not mentioned a lot is women get to cross dress all the time and no one says anything. Women wear jeans and cowboy boots but God forbid a man wears a dress. I remember some friend joking with me about how I throw a ball like a boy and how I can punch, (I've had a few fights but that is behind me) like a man. It made me feel good. To switch that around would be an insult to many men.

[It's a woman's world.]

I found out about this marvelous support organization for
intersexuals ... (during my work with PFLAG)...

[We'll PFLAG your intersexual comment for future reference.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

"So my new book is now available at Amazon"---Pitt

What a day it has been for William Rivers Pitt. First he wins FIRST PLACE in the DUmmie Of The Year AWARD and then he announces the publication of his book (co-authored with Cindy Sheehan, not the child molester this time) as you can see in his THREAD titled, "So my new book is now available at Amazon." The problem for Pitt (in addition to the fact that his book has almost no sales) is that it is also being FReeped on Amazon as you can see in this related DUmmie THREAD titled, "Help William Pitt's rating on Amazon!" So let us now watch the DUmmie Of The Year boast about his non-selling book in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, congratulating the Most Inept Press Secretary In The History Of All The Known Universes on his big win today, is in the [brackets]:

So my new book is now available at Amazon

[And being FReeped at Amazon.]

Forgive the cheeser self-promotion, but I'm thinking this will serve as a great gift for any GOP/fundy/uninformed relative you have to see come Christmas.

[It will make for a great paperweight.]

House of Ill Repute: Reflections on War, Lies, and America's Ravaged Reputation

[Speaking of Ravaged Reputation, how is that Karl Rove indictment scoop of yours going, Will?]

Book Description

The presidency of George W. Bush promised to restore integrity to the White House, but instead it has been plagued by scandal. With his strong voice and biting humor, William Rivers Pitt guides readers through a jaw-dropping series of presidential blunders. In this collection of articles that first appeared on truthout.org, he dissects the entire war on Iraq, including the relentless push toward war, the missing weapons of mass destruction, the Halliburton contracting scandals, sectarian violence, and the possibility of a regional conflagration. Others pieces tackle the outing of Valerie Plame, the NSA’s warrantless wiretaps, the Abramoff scandal, Lewis Libby’s indictment, and the incompetent response to Hurricane Katrina. Several essays focus on Cindy Sheehan and other citizen activists. For anyone who suspects the Bush administration of playing fast and loose with the facts, William Rivers Pitt provides a welcome voice of truth, untainted by corporate ownership.

[Lewis Libby's indictment? What about Karl Rove's indictment last May 12?]

LINK

Thanks WIll and Congratulations on your book. Hope it sells well.

[It's expected to sell into the double digits by New Years Day.]

Holding out for my autographed copy.

[Pitt will also autograph your copy of Karl Rove's indictment papers.]

That depends William, is it hard cover or soft cover?

[Vanity publishing is always cheaper when you do it soft.]

Soft

[Thanx for the prompt answer, Will.]

Will there be autographed copies available anywhere?

[When Will Pitt autographs a book, its value on eBay drops to less than zero.]

People have seen what you've signed in other books and are promptly confused.

[Wow! Even Pitt's signature is confusing. It matches the rest of his overlong writing.]

Is it available in a real book store? I hate paying shipping costs for books.

[Only the Bukowski's Restroom Bookstore will be carrying it.]

After Christmas, I think. Some places may have it in already, but haven't put it out yet. You can ask at your store, but I'm not sure.

[But I'm sure, Will. Forget about seeing it in any REAL bookstore.]

What a wonderful gift for only $10.17! I'll process the order later today.

[Wait a couple of weeks and you can have it for 99 cents.]

No nasty RW reviews yet

[Have patience. Hee! Hee!]

There's a review now. Called us moonbats. How could he have read it ?

[At least he didn't call you DUmmies.]

Both freeper reviews have been scrubbed

[Don't worry. More will pop up.]

Well, I have to assume that Seattle is on the menu for the book tour at some point.

[When will you be in Ft. Lauderdale, Pitt, for your gigantic book tour?]

Just ordered it! Now come down to Florida and autograph it!

[Come on down, Pitt, so you can autograph my copy of Karl Rove's indictment.]

Taking a truthout sabbatical and writing another book.

[Taking a sabbatical from Jason Leopold and the fashion photographer?]

Barnes and Noble has it on their site, but are listing it as by Cindy Sheehan. Weird.

[BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Pied Piper Pitt can't even get credit for his own book. However, now we know why Pitt was shmoozing Cindy in the Texas ditch. And now on to Help William Pitt's rating on Amazon!]

Help William Pitt's rating on Amazon!

[He's being FReeeeeeeeped!!!]

A freeper idiot has already posted the following on Amazon:

Nothing but a Moonbat hit piece. All you need to know is this guy is a regular over on the Democrat Underground... moonbat central!

[aka DUmmie central.]

It freaks out an author or publisher to be slammed like that.

[It might even drive Pitt to drink.]

There's a new Freeper review up

This guy wouldn't know the TRUTH if it was OUT behind him. Sorry I can't bear to read any more leftist drivel from this biased and extremely fictional writer. The writer is trying to distort truth and history all in one fantasy book. I'm giving this trash a thumb's down.

[At least Pitt was able to determine the exact moment the Third American Empire was born at the 1980 Winter Olympic Games.]

Thanks guys. I actually hope they keep the Freep reviews. Pretty much the best advertisement for the book. The Freep reviews for the Iraq book were the highest of comedy, especially after a couple of years passed and the WMD never materialized. They wound up getting deleted, sadly.

[Did Karl Rove's indictment ever materialize, Will?]

Is ANYone else tired of the word "Moonbat"?
Can they at least be creative in their burns, as highly incapable as they are of it? They use that same word over and over and over and over again. PLEASE, slappy. ENOUGH with the "moonbat", "Lib", "Defeatocrats", "DUmmies"; PLEASE leave the funny to us, because you schmucks are so bad at it.

[Hmmm.... "DUmmies" quickly followed by "funny." I think this DUmmie is sending us a secret code signal.]

There's another freepie review up...

Pitt's mephitic prose and principled stand against the powers of ratiocination make this book impossible to put down. Even if you're in an alcohol-induced stupor, or just slow-witted, you'll finish in 24 business hours or less.

[LOL! That review is my fave!]

And another! We get rid of a negative review, and two other
ugly ones replace it!

I am surprised that William Rivers Pitt sobered up long enough to write a book.Perhaps he was able to stay booze free for 24 business hours and managed to get his book written in that time. Mr. Pitt is also a member in good standing at the internets biggest open sewer, Democratic Underground (not as good as he was before the Rove thing.even MOONBATS don't forget some things) Waste your money if you want.....

[Another HILARIOUS review! Pitt can't escape from the Indictment That Dare Not Speak Its Name.]

Theres a shitload of freeper reviews now calling William Pitt a "drunkard" and a "moonbat"

[At least the descriptions of Pitt are accurate.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

DUmmies Still Praying For Fitzmas

MERRY FITZMAS!!! That's right. Fitzmas may be just around the corner. At least that's what many DUmmies believe. Despite having been burned many times waiting for the arrival of Fitzmas, many DUmmies still believe Fitzmas could be coming soon as you can see in this THREAD titled, "PREDICTION: Cheney Will Perjure himself during testimony." How about this for a more accurate title, "PREDICTION: DUmmies Will Continue To Await The Arrival Of The Great Pumpkin." So let us now watch the DUmmies once again await the arrival of their long delayed Fitzmas in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if that was the Great Pumpkin or the Tooth Fairy that he just spotted, is in the [brackets]:

PREDICTION: Cheney Will Perjure himself during testimony

[PREDICTION: The Great Pumpkin Arrives At Midnight.]

And Fitzgerald is ready for it. Rove and Scooter have cut deals to take down Cheney. When he does, he'll be forced to resign and then he'll be indicted.

[The impeachment wish scenario. Cheney won't even have to be impeached since he will split first.]

Hmm ... interesting possibility. And investigations would hopefully get RatBastard to crack ...

[And if that doesn't work, they can waterboard him.]

If his lips move, he's lying. That's a proven fact.

[An accurate appraisal of Bill Clinton.]

YES! Oh please please please let this be true!

[Oh please please please give us our long delayed Fitzmas.]

Rove and Cheney have cut deals with Fitzgerald? Gut? Clues?

[Fantasy?]

Rove was going to be indicted. Truthout was not the only one who thought this. Why wasn't he? Because he cut a deal. Scooter, if he has half a brain, would not rely on Cheney's testimony for his defense. But it is the DEFENSE that is calling Cheney, not the Prosecution. The only way they would do this is to set Cheney up for a fall. All Clues and Guts, no facts, just supposition.

[Just fantasy.]

oh jeez. not more "fitzmas" nonsense . . .

[Killjoy! Fitzmas fantasies are FUn to watch!]

It's a perfect setup for the defense to call him and not the prosecution. If the prosecution was calling him, Cheney would be defensive. Cheney won't be prepared for a betrayal from the defense.

[And you won't be prepared for another ruined Fitzmas.]

Those that gave up on Fitz will see for themselves that, this guy is no push over, and the dirt we all knew was there....is there.Cheney will be gone by the end of January! Why do you think McCain has been sucking ass so hard here lately ? He really believes the Senate will confirm him...and they just may.

[And won't Kerry be inaugurated as president on Jan. 20?]

Cheney would resign, then Bush would resign or be impeached.

[All by the end of January.]

What's the old saying? Don't count your chickens before their hatched?

[aka Freudenschade.]

Dick Cheney will "have a fatal heart attack" and hang out with Ken Lay in the South Pacific before he lets himself get indicted.

[They will be joining Judge Crater in the South Pacific.]

We're gionna wash that man right out of our hair.

[I think that is one South Pacific song not yet parodied by a certain St. Louis songmeister.]

Seriously, to see Cheney publicly exposed under oath would be orgasmic.

[Is that you, ben burch?]

And if he doesn't perjure himself on the Plame affair he will do so in the Nigerian bribery scandal.Or on the Hal/KBR Iraq fiasco.or on a multitude of issues. One way or another he IS GOING DOWN baby!!

[Speaking of the Nigerian bribery scandal, you are just ten dollars away from receiving a half million dollars from my uncle, Charles B. Obobwanago, who had to flee Nigeria because of that scandal. Please send us your bank account information so we may deposit that amount in your account.]

The chances of him actually committing perjury are very slight indeed, and the chances of him being convicted of it are negligable.

[Your Kewpie Doll is in the mail.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

"MSNBC's Olbermann Seeks Big Raise"

The DUmmies are not shy about attacking the rich EXCEPT when one of their own strives to become wealthy beyond what he deserves. Such is the case with Keith Olbermann who is now demanding a fourfold salary increase. As a strong liberal, Keith does not realize that there is a correlation between ratings and revenue. And since the ratings for MSNBC are pathetically low, then revenue must also be in the dumps. However, despite that economic reality, Olbermann is demanding that his salary be increased from a million bucks per year to FOUR million. The problem is that his show does not draw the numbers that would justify such a grotesque salary increase. Keith should consider himself lucky that he is even making a million dollars per year from the troubled MSNBC and keep a candle lit while praying that he does not get fired for earning his current inflated salary. Of course, MSNBC is NOT going to fork over anywhere near four million big ones to Olbermann. For one thing, he is just not worth it. On top of that, to pay Olbermann a big increase would mean that Chris Matthews would demand a similar increase which is something MSNBC wants to avoid. You can find the evasions of economic broadcasting facts on this DUmmie THREAD titled, "MSNBC's Olbermann Seeks Big Raise." So let us now watch the DUmmies demand that rich liberal Keith Olbermann become even richer in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting that a lot of websites get a lot more readers daily than MSNBC gets viewers, is in the [brackets]:

MSNBC's Olbermann Seeks Big Raise

[Keith Olbermann desperately wants to become a rich fatcat despite ratings that don't justify it.]

Olbermann and MSNBC are knocking heads over a new contract. The controversial host of Countdown With Keith Olbermann is said to be seeking "north of $4 million" a year, according to an industry source, to re-up on his pact that comes due in April. That would represent roughly a four-fold increase over his current deal, believed to be in the $1 million-per-year range.

[I would love to be in that room when the MSNBC execs tell Keith that he is just not worth it.]

Olbermann is looking for such a big pay raise because Countdown has been on fire, playing a big part in the current audience uptick at the network. In the key 25-54 demo, its ratings are up 25% year-to-date and an astounding 75% so far in the fourth quarter.

[Increasing your ratings a bit from pathetically low is no great task. Most of that increase was due to interest in the mid-term elections which does not exist now.]

But MSNBC brass may have their hands tied on how much they can pony up for Olbermann. MSNBC parent NBC Universal has mandated $750 million worth of budget cuts across all divisions, and this is hardly a politic time to hand out a gargantuan raise. Meanwhile, CNN may have interest. (snip)

[Great timing on Olbermann's part. Big budget cuts and Keith chooses now to make a demand for a grotesque salary increase not supported by economic facts.]

He deserves the raise. I think the request for $4 million is just something Keith's agent is putting out there as a starting point to negotiate. I'm sure he won't get that much, but he'll probably get a raise.

[Yeah, they'll give Keith a raise of 10 bucks per year.]

Wow, Olbie on CNN could be huge for his career. Moreover I could see the other big two picking him up as well. MSNBC is ok, but it sure is'nt Prime Time in the business news. If CNN does pick him up I hope they keep to the same format that has made him successful. Not to mention his crack team.

[Keith would bomb at CNN as well since that network is also suffering lousy ratings.]

Not a good sign. Usually, such moves mean one of three things:

1. The person seeking the enormous salary is sick of their job and only a huge salary will keep them in place.
2. The person seeking the raise is suffering from massive ego inflation.
3. The market would support such a salary -- it's a fair request or he's been offered another job.

[The the winner is...NUMBER TWO!!!]


I don't see Olbermann getting $4,000,000 anywhere else, so I don't think option 3 is the ticket. Although, anything is possible -- look at Limbaugh's salary!

[Limbaugh OWNS his show. He salary is entirely net revenue generated from his HUGE ratings. Keith would have to take a salary CUT based on that formula.]

Since the source appears to be MSNBC it may indicate that General Electric wants to get rid of Olbermann and replace him with a rightwinger.

[Which means a neutered MSNBC Republican like Joe Scarborough or Tucker Carlson.]

Wasn't There a Rumor, 'bout a Month Ago. That his show was going to be bumped over to CNBC?

[That's like going from bad to worse.]

One would hope that if Keith is truly a champion for progressive ideals, he may have a problem making 100x what his camera men or researchers or assistant to the junior writers are making. And that he'll either donate money to worthy causes or forego some of his obscene pay to the working families of those who create much of the content for his show.

[Keith would keep most of his obscene pay. Liberals are exempt from those attacks on greedy rich folks.]

people on the left better have money to do battle with the
parasites on the right.

[Great justification for Keith's inflated salary demands. I can just picture Keith sipping on a thousand dollar bottle of cognac at an exclusive NY restaurant proclaiming he is in the middle of doing battle with the parasites on the right.]

They are shedding $750 million costs (which means people), and Olberman is going going to get a 300% raise! $3 million dollars. That could cost 100+ low-end workers their jobs at MSNBC. Does Olberman not see this, or not care?

[Both.]

Couric making 13 mill. NBC supposedly offered her 20 to stay but she took a 13 mill offer from CBS to do anchoring which is what she was making at NBC ever since 2001.

[DUmbest media move ever.]

They better give it to him too!

[A DUmmie makes a threat on behalf of Olbermann's inflated salary demand.]

I'm still not convinced that he's really "speaking his mind". Some of his speeches seemed like ratings grabs to me. But, that is just my opinion. I hope I'm wrong because I really enjoyed watching him in the runup to the election.
But if you have a big contract negotiation coming up and there's an election and you sense you can make ratings by pandering to the ticked off and motivated side.....you might do some things to get said ratings.

[The key word here is "pandering."]

ALL HaiL Keith O~~ I love, love, LOVEEEEEEE Keith. He, along with Stewart, Colbert, Wes Clark, Mike Malloy, Max Cleland, (to name a few) ARE MY HEROES!!! Give them the reins in their appropriate venues and let them HEAL the NATION!! It's so broken, lame, dirty and sad that it will take a whole TEAM of specialists to repair it!! I am POSITIVE they deserve what EVER money is available and I'm sure they will ALL give their share in charities or donations. For they speak for ME and I am a giving soul that cares about this country (has served) and lived long enough to spot the real thing when it's in front of me! Not that any of them couldn't FALL short on an occasion as they are all HUmans! I'd forgive them a moments greed, vanity, what ever. I'm also SOOOO proud of the DEMOCRATS and us BLOGGERS!! WE deserve an accolade or two as well! CHEERS~

[Some input from the mindless groupie contingent whose sarcasm makes me suspect she is really a LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

If I couldn't give him all four mill, I'd find a way to sweeten everything else.

[Give him free donuts.]

One thing they have to do is start getting better advertisers for his show and Tweety's. Not everyone watching MSNBC is 68 years old in need of knee replacements and Medicare prescription plans. It's their own fault if they are not getting top dollar for ads for his audience, which is far younger than most cable news audiences.

[A DUmmie gives a slight nod to economic reality. The advertisers aren't there because the ratings aren't there.]

I say give it too him

[The shove out the MSNBC door?]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

"Am I to discount everything TruthOut has ever written because of one incident?"

So they made just one tiny mistake (that they never apologized for). DUmmie trumad now wants to know in this THREAD, "Am I to discount everything TruthOut has ever written because of one incident?" He is referring, of course, to the Non-indictment that Dares Not Speak It's Name, namely the Non-indictment of Karl Rove last May 12 despite TruthOut staking its reputation on that "fact." Also putting themselves on the line were the Truthout publisher and fashion photographer, Marc Ash, star reporter Jason Leopold (pictured above) who appears in this thread to face the music, and Truthout editor, William Rivers Pitt, who is conspicuous, as ever, by his absence whenever the subject of the Rove non-indictment comes up. So let us now watch the DUmmies question the credibility of TruthOut in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting that Jason Leopold and Pied Piper Pitt both share the same fishbelly white pallid skin tone, is in the [brackets]:

Am I to discount everything TruthOut has ever written because of one incident?

[Just ONE incident?]

I don't know.... I've read TruthOut almost since it's inception. I've always found it a great source of political information and it seems to me that they've had a flawless reputation as a go-to accurate source.

[As flawless and go-to accurate as Dan Rather.]

BUT then came the Rove indictment story. I honestly can't tell you what was told to the Editors of TruthOut or to Jason Leopold and I can betcha a majority of those who offer up negative posts about TruthOut have no idea as well. Did they flat out make it up? I doubt it. Does Will Pitt come across as a liar? I don't think so and why would he lie?

[Will Pitt doesn't come across as anything lately because he is always hiding under a Bukowski's table whenever the subject of the Karl Rove non-indictment comes up.]

Did they handle the aftermath of the botched story as well as they should have? Me-thinks not really. If they would have come out with one explanation and said they stick by their sources, I think things would have blown over much quicker. Instead, they made it bigger with some comments that I'm sure they regret. Hey--- they're an on-line pub with not much experience with a major-size backlash like this.

[Hey! They were just "ahead of the news cycle." When the news cycle finally catches up to them, Karl Rove WILL have been indicted last May 12.]

So here's the thing--- If I were to write a pro and con list about TruthOut, it looks like the Pros out- number the cons 10 to 1. Or am I missing something?

[Reality. And now on to the other DUmmie comments...]

That sounds right, to me. And I still doubt that we know the full story on the Rove indictment and/or Leopold's reporting of it.

[The full story of what really happened will be revealed in just 24 business hours.]

I agree with that.... methinks there is more to it then we know. However, I do think Leopold should out that source......

[Come on Jason. Lay off the Lithium treatment just long enough to out Sonny Crockett as your source.]

Leopold and TruthOut are not the first to ever be burned by a source.

[And TruthOut wasn't the first rag to be burned by Jason Leopold, a self-confessed liar, drug addict, and crook.]

True, they may have gotten a bit ahead of themselves.

[The correct term is they "got ahead of the news cycle."]

Leopold said that if his source was wrong he would out that source. The source was wrong. Leopold did not out him. As far as I'm concerned Leopold is just a showboater who likes attention and until he outs the source I can never take him seriously as a journalist.

[Will Pitt still has unquestioning faith in Leopold.]

I just don't understand why TO didn't give a solid, sincere "We f*cked up, we were conned by a guy who is a serial liar" mea culpa. Instead, they stuck by a guy with a history of 'horseshittery' and never adequately explained or atoned for their cock-up. Indeed, last I remember, they were in a hole and they kept digging. That suggests an absence of judgment, IMHO...so I've no choice, really, but to look askance at anything they say that isn't also reported, independently, by another source. They lost my trust with that fiasco, and not because they got conned--that happens to good people every day--but because they treated their readers like idiots, never explained, and seemed to blame the readers for not 'believing'....like seven year olds and Santa, really. I might think about that stance for, I dunno, 24 'business hours' and come up with a more charitable approach, but right now I think they treated their readers disrespectfully and relied on more good will than they in fact possessed.

[It will take a lot more than 24 business hours for Google News to ever use TruthOut again as a source. Thanks to the wonderful reporting team of Leopold & Lib (Pitt), Google REMOVED TruthOut from Google News.]

They did their due diligence. AND if you think they didn't then I am to surmise that you think Pitt and Ash are liars. I ain't going there because I trust that they are not.

[That's okay. You have permission to go there.]

If that is true, they should out the lying source. Something stinks, there. It doesn't make sense to cover for a liar. It just doesn't. And that moving 24 business hour goalpost just sounded like pure, made-up, horseshit to me. "The dog ate my homework" would have been more believable. Now that is just my opinion, I realize that others may not feel that way. It doesn't pass my smell test, to me it looked like they got caught in a mess and yeah, if they didn't try to lie their way out of it, they suspended judgment and passed on a cockamamie story, or they made stuff up as they went along, and I don't believe that they were being honest with their readers. Again, just my opinion, and just my impression. Others' mileage will likely vary.

[The dog ate my homework 24 business hours ago.]

IMO this was a set-up like Dan Rather. The fascisti have found the Achilles heel of citizen journalism and they are working it for all its worth.

[The fascisti worked diligently for 24 business hours to take down that amazing reportorial team of Leopold & Lib.]

TruthOut had no incident in my eyes. I believe and trust Will Pitt ... and find Jason to of reported his Rove story with a sincere heart.....no malice intent. What happened after the story broke, as in no Rove indictment does not mean his story and data was false.

[I BEEEEEEEELLLEEEEEEEVE!!!]

Dan Rather. Judith Miller and the NYT. More seasoned jouralists than Leopold have been screwed over by Bushco.

[So making out Jason Leopold to be a liar, drug addict, and a crook was a piece of cake.]

Point out one instance where I "demanded" you believe anything. You call yourself a liberal. You are no better than the liars on the right you claims to abhor. I certainly never demanded anyone believe anything. No one did.

[That was Jason Leopold himself posting from the asylum. You're right, Jason. No one believed anything you wrote except for the DUmmies.]

You were not posting here at the time your article came out. Instead, another Truthout employee demanded that we take the article on faith.

[That was William Rivers Pitt posting his famous articles of faith tracts on the DUmmie Door.]

I, and many others, were roundly criticized for being skeptical of your article from a number of people here on DU. Anyone who was skeptical of your article was called a "cretin" and a "f*ckshit of low mental weight."

[That was Pied Piper Pitt posting under the influence of too many Bukowski's refreshments.]

If your article was true, why is Rove free today?

[Because intrepid boy reporter, Jason Leopold, got too far ahead of the news cycle?]

Prove one instance where the NYT outs their sources. I dare you

[Leopold issues a Truth or Dare.]

I don't regret helping Pitt get his publishing contract, but I wasn't prepared for the disinformation campaign he waged here to protect Bev Harris. So yes, he's perfectly capable of lying.

[Pied Piper Pitt is just $10 away from getting his publishing contract.]

Everybody makes a mistake now and then. Nobody should think of it as a big deal.

[Said the captain of the Titanic.]

Jason has some serious incidents in his recent journalism past (regardless if they're right, wrong, or even if those publications were actively trashing Jason), and it was Ash's duty to be extra careful with Leopold. Truthout's lost reputation can be put squarely on Mark Ash's shoulders. Period.

[Incidents like flat out lying in his stories. No big deal.]

Sure, everyone makes mistakes, but that's what retractions are for, and Truthout never fully retracted the Rove stories. Can they be trusted as a news source? Google doesn't think so. Google had included Truthout as a news source in their news site until the Rove indictment stories. Then they abruptly pulled Truthout, and they've never added them back.

[Perhaps they will in 24 business hours.]

Getting the story wrong AND insulting people for not believing said story? Not the way to build trust in your organization.

[Pitt's excuse was that he was not only an incompetent press secretary but an incompetent editor as well.]

Leopold made the story up, hoping it would turn out to be true and then he'd look like they'd have scooped the MSM.

[And this DUmmie WINS a Kewpie Doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity!]

Don't forget that Leopold had a book to sell...
If it had turned out Rove was indicted (which a lot of people believed would happen) then Leopold would have really benefitted financially.

[Notes From The Asylum: The Jason Leopold Story.]

Did YOU speak to Leopold's source? Don't forget when this whole thing was coming down, first there were a dozen sources, then eight or six, down to three or two, then one? I can't exactly remember, but the number of sources was all over the map and changed several times from Will Pitt's first posting of Leopold's article on the DU. Exactly which of the non-existent sources did Ash talk to? All of em? Or was it just one? Or NONE? Who can tell?

[Check the Bukowski's barroom floor and pose those questions to Will Pitt when he finally awakes from the nightly coma.]

Sure, they could have sources. Then again, they might not have sources. Or their source might be a pink elephant in a tutu. Prove to me that's not true.

[That pink elephant in a tutu is just Will Pitt's version of his personal Harvey.]

I really think Leopold could get his career back if he were to out his source and really tell us what happened.

[Unfortunately, his source is sealed on the fourth floor of Paxton Boggs.]

Truthout was far from the only news source that believed Rove was about to be indicted. David Shuster reported much the same thing on MSNBC. Many other people were confident that Mr. Fitzgerald was moving towards indictment in early May. I count myself as being among them.

[Thanx for reminding us that David Shuster was an idiot too.]

Don't forget, the Rove indictment came on the heels of Truthout being questioned about a Leopold article where he said Rove or Rove's lawyer had received a target letter, also of which was never substantiated. THEN after the Rove indictment fiasco occurred, they held fast to the story, even when it got to unbelievable ends...I kept waiting for Truthout to do the obvious thing they should have done: issued a statement that they were retracting the story until they had information that could substantiate it.

[On the up side it did cause Pied Piper Pitt to post his Endless "Penitence" At DUmmie Canossa whose very length qualifed for the Guiness Book of Records.]

Before the Rove has been indicted story was printed, Leopold wrote a story that Rove and/or his attorney received a target letter. When Leopold was facing severe questioning about the truthfulness/facts of that story, he suddenly came out with the indictment story. It appeared he published that one to divert the bad attention from the target letter story being bogus, figuring Rove would be indicted any day (which appeared was going to be the case), then when he wasn't, then even worse spin began...

[TruthOut's fashion photographer thought it passed the smell test plus the most Incompetent Press Secretary in the History of All the Known Universes thought the Leopold story was entirely credible as well.]

I have no personal beef with you, Jason. I have an aversion to bad journalism and media spin. It has nothing to do with you, and I had no intention of bringing any of your prior history up until you made it a big issue. I even complimented you on your book and writing ability. You gotta stop being paranoid. Columbia Journalism Review points out how you seem to think everyone is always out to get you - that everyone is after you.

[To request that Jason Leopold stop being paranoid is like asking a normal person to stop breathing.]

It isn't the event. It was the coverup. The obvious lies by Leopold were masked by total, utter bullshit by Marc Ash. I lost all faith, but not when they were caught with believing bad sources - that happens. It was the aftermath that bothered me. The slow, painful way in which they tried to linger on the original story despite the obvious (to everyone else?) nonsense that it was based on. They didn't own up to their mistakes for a painfully long time.

[Thus toppling the reputation of that giant of journalism---TruthOutTheDoor.]

Will Pitt's drunken rant on here really lowered TruthOut in my eyes, too.

[Which drunken rant? Will Pitt rants drunkenly almost every time he crawls home from Bukowski's which means its hard to keep track of them all.]

Patrick Fitzgerald's office has yet to confirm or deny
all we have is the word of Karl Rove's attorney who has been known to lie to protect his clients.

[That's right, Jason. Why should we believe Rove's attorney or the small detail that Karl Rove is still walking around free? Instead we should place our faith in your credibility that Rove was indicted last May 12.]

So again, all you have is the word of Rove's attorney. nothing else. no documents. Nothing. Just the word of his attorney. So we are sticking to our story and we have said so many times already, but some people just can't seem to accept that.

[Proclaimed Jason Leopold between electro-shocks.]

I am sticking to the story. that is my point. Debate the shit out of it here. But I am sticking to it.

[The sun rises in the west. that is my point. Debate the shit out of it here. But I am sticking to it.]

Did I ever once say or claim or opine that people were out to get me? You put that in quotes. No. I never did. So your interpretation is way off base. At what point do you accept that this is the way it is.

[Stated Jason Leopold from the Rubber Room.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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HUffies Attack Miss America

Take a good look at the photo above, guys. Okay, when you are finally done drooling uncontrollably, try to guess which one was Miss America 2001, Angela Perez Baraquio from Hawaii. It's impossible to pick out who was Miss America because all seven of the Baraquio sisters are STUNNING. Yes, you read that right. I wrote "sisters." Amazingly, those Baraquio sisters are all so hot looking that ANY one of them could have been crowned as Miss America. For this reason I am not going to pick out which of those stunnees was the actual Miss America. Does it really matter? Oh, I think there is a purpose to this DUmmie FUnnies edition but I am so dazzled by that photo that it is hard to come to my senses. Give me a moment here to recover..... Okay, I think I now remember. Senator Sam Brownback has has hired Miss America 2001, Angela Perez Baraquio (she could be any of the women in the photo), to join his presidential exploratory committee. As a result he is getting slammed for this by the HUffies at the HUffington Post as you can see in this THREAD titled, "Potential '08 GOP Candidate Brownback Recruits Fmr. Miss America To Serve On Exploratory Committee..." Personally, Brownback isn't exactly my cup of tea. He comes off a bit too nerdy and we saw how nerds fare back in 1988 when powerwalking nerd, Michael Dukakis, slipped badly in the polls from a solid lead to a landslide loss. On a related matter, the DUmmie FUnnies will soon be endorsing a candidate for presidential nomination whose identity will absolutely shock you. However, despite our reservations about Brownback, we heartily salute him on his choice of Miss America to join his presidential exploratory committee. We only wish he had chosen ALL of the Baraquio sisters to join his committee so they could tour America and feel the pulse of the public. Meanwhile, let us now watch the HUffies grumble like angry little trolls over Miss America in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, inviting all the Baraquio sisters to be his Imperial Court Maidens when he is coronated as Emperor Of All The Known Blogospheres at Las Vegas BlogWorld next November, is in the [brackets]:

Sen. Sam Brownback, R-Kansas, has recruited a former Miss America and a former U.S. Senate candidate to join his presidential exploratory committee. Former U.S. Senate candidate Jerry Zandstra of Michigan and former Miss America 2001 Angela Perez Baraquio of Hawaii will help communicate Brownback's platform in their respective states, the senator's exploratory committee announced Thursday.

[Jerry Zandstra is like whatever act immediately preceded the Beatles when they appeared for the first time on the Ed Sullivan Show. Doomed to be immediately forgotten.]

T&A and religion--yup, that pretty much sums up the Republican strategy for politicking.

[I'm sort of partial to the T&A part myself.]

Anita Bryant must have turned down the offer.

[Does Anita Bryant also have six hot looking sisters?]

Wow those are some incredibly sexist comments you both just made. Just because she is beautiful and was a fmr. Miss America she cannot get involved in politics? Makes sense.

[More Miss Americas need to get involved in politics.]

Precisely what is Brownback exploring with Miss America?

[I'm not sure but I would love to be the point man of his exploration expedition.]

Since the Queen of America hasn't married and had kids I assume she uses contraception and is (like every "good" Catholic)as full of shit as a Christmas Turkey.

[Feel the love!]

Brownback's working for the Pope.

[He receives daily instructions from the Vatican.]

Brownback is a religious lunatic. According to Brownback, America should "be run by The Church and big business". He is a true religious fascist, and he's completely insane. God help us all if this lunatic get into the Whitehouse.

[Oh yes. How we all remember that famous Brownback speech (which no one can locate) about how America should "be run by The Church and big business".]

That's a sex scandal waiting to happen. I can't wait.

[If Miss America were interning for Bill Clinton, that statement would be correct.]

Beauty and The Beast

[Now being remade as a movie starring Barbara Streisand called, "Ugly and The Beast."]

Brownback is a dangerous bible thumping nut job.

[At least he isn't thumping interns like Billy Boy.]

Oh, everyone, please do not be so hard on Sam Brownback. With his "stuck in the fifties" world view, it might be fun to watch him expose his fundamentalist Nazi views for four years.

[Only a HUffie would be hard on Sam Brownback when Miss America is on the scene.]

Early on, such a decision doesn't bode well for this candidate as far as his depth...

[I agree. Brownback should have had ALL the Hawaiian Baraquio sisters on his exploratory committee instead of just one.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

"Oh Will Pitt... they're talking about you..."

(Before you proceed, don't forget to go to the 2006 Weblog Awards and VOTE for NewsBusters as the "Best Media Blog." Thank you.)

This is TOO FUnnie!!! Normally when I view DUmmie threads in my DUFU auditioning process, I look upon them with a detached professional eye. In this case I uncharacteristically burst out laughing and pounding my computer desk. It has to do with the incredible CONFESSION of personal incompetence on Tuesday by our favorite DUFUable DUmmie, William Rivers Pitt. His confession has now made it into NewsBusters (and Google News). Therefore, a future prospective political campaign employer merely has to check Google News to see that Pitt has disqualified himself from any future employment in that arena due to his self-declared incompetence. And now the DUmmies have featured that same NewsBusters story in this THREAD, "Oh Will Pitt... they're talking about you..." As yet there is no reaction by Pied Piper Pitt to this story. However, I don't see how he can get angry over the revelation of his incompetence since the person making this accustion was William Rivers Pitt. Surprisingly, few DUmmies got outraged over this NewsBusters story. Instead many of them are using this story to also accuse the Dennis Kucinich campaign of incompetence. So let us now watch the DUmmies discuss Pied Piper Pitt's very PUBLIC incompetence in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering who the author of that NewsBusters story is since he name sounds vaguely familiar, is in the [brackets]:

Oh Will Pitt... they're talking about you...

[And laughing AT you...]

http://newsbusters.org/node/9645

*sigh*

[*smirk*]

"Dennis Kucinich Presidential Kickoff Buried Under Avalanche Of Media Obama Worship

Posted by P.J. Gladnick on December 13, 2006 - 17:18.

[P.J. Gladnick---That name sounds so familiar yet I still can't quite remember him.]

Talk about bad timing. Dennis Kucinich yesterday announced that he will be running for the Democrat presidential nomination in '08 and almost no one noticed. No wonder. It was impossible for Kucinich to get the least bit of attention focused on himself because most of the media was in the midst of an orgy of Obama worship even though the junior Senator from Illinois hasn't even officially announced that he is running for president. In case you think things couldn't get any worse for the Kucinich campaign, they do. The day before Kucinich made his announcement that almost no one noticed, his former press secretary made a startling confession of personal incompetence and declared that Kucinich might not be qualified to become president because he was clueless enough to hire a press secretary with absolutely no ability such as himself. In case you think this is a skit for a comedy show, it's not. You can read for yourself the confession of incompetence by William Rivers Pitt at the Democratic Underground:"

[In a way it IS a skit for a comedy show. The DUmmie FUnnies Comedy Show.]

Pitt is Kucinich's press secretary?

[WAS. Pitt WAS Kucinich's press secretary in 2004 until he was forced to leave after a couple of weeks under "mysterious circumstances."]

What happened?

[Will Pitt was so incompetent that he didn't realize that it is unethical for the press secretary of one campaign to feed inside info to a rival campaign.]

If you read the linked article, it quotes Pitt as to what happened.....

[Pitt confessed his own incompetence and now the WHOLE WORLD KNOWS.]

Here

[And HERE.]

There was a high turnover rate of staff on that campaign.

[Pied Piper Pitt lasted a couple of weeks so he had more longevity than most.]

The entire staff of NewsBlusters... Should wish they were as incompetent as the good Mr. Pitt. After all, did he not write the single most prophetic book on the Iraq war, extant? Hmmm?

[After all, did he not accurately predict the indictment of Karl Rove last May 12? Hmmm?]

LOL Funny but Will has a point.

[That he's utterly incompetent.]

I missed that thread. Will Pitt was the third for fourth press secretary Kucinich had. More importantly, look at who he hires as campaign manager. He had two different ones in 2003/04. Neither of them were remotely qualified for the position. Additionally, he drove away or fired the few qualified campaign staff he did manage to hire. His second campaign manager had never worked on a political campaign of any kind at any level. Dennis needs to stop being paranoid and hire someone qualified to manage a campaign. If he can't do that, then his failure will be his own fault and he doesn't deserve the efforts of supporters who take his campaign more seriously than he does.

[Kookcinich '08!]

Can I ask how he chased the competent people away? What happened?

[Sh*t happens.]

I'd rather not get into the details of what happened. But those who watched his campaign closely or were part of it saw the few people he started out with who did have real-world campaign experience leave, one after the other. They were generally replaced by people as unqualified as the campaign manager. If Kucinich hires a qualified campaign manager this time, I might take him seriously. If he hires the same person, or another person who is equally unqualified, then I don't think he is taking his campaign seriously so neither will I.

[So if he hires Will Pitt again, I guess we can go ahead and write off his campaign?]

And if a guy isn't able to choose competent people to run his election campaign...I'm not sure I want him in the White House choosing ostensibly 'competent' people for much higher positions.

[I'm trying to envision Pied Piper Pitt as a White House spokesman and I am conjuring up a lot of laughter.]

He seemed to do a great job in '04 for a guy that was villified as an "elf, wooden and weird looking." I met him at a big rally and he can really turn on a crowd and he answers questions honestly and is neither as short or weird looking in person as he seems to come off on the Tee Vee Screen.

[On the Tee Vee Screen Kucinich comes off as a weird looking elf but in real life he appears as studly as the Terminator.]

I'm not sure that any of the old stories about his campaign managers are still online. I'm not finding any yet. But, there were several stories when he hired his second campaign manager and they all pointed out that the first had almost zero campaign experience and the second had absolutely zero campaign experience. Yes, he did have the option of choosing someone at least nominally qualified but he preferred people who he felt closer to personally.

[Ah but the third campaign manager had LESS than zero campaign experience.]

Since I'm posting anonymously, any claims I make about personal experience won't have credibility anyway. I would just strongly suggest to anyone supporting Kucinich that they watch who he hires as campaign manager. If he hires another person with no campaign experience as manager and in other top positions it will suggest that he didn't learn from his mistakes in 2004. It will also mean that his campaign will be the organizational disaster it was in 2004 and it will be his own fault when he loses. Personally, I'm not willing to invest time and money to support him like I did in 2003/04 if he isn't willing to take his campaign seriously enough to hire a decent manager and pick up the phone to raise money, which is another thing he didn't do last time.

[Maybe Will Pitt should apply to be the Kucinich campaign manager this time. Remember, Pitt only said that he was incompetent as a press secretary. He hasn't been given a chance to display his utter incompetence as a campaign manager. Give the guy a chance.]

hmmm...Freeper Trolls run off and do their dirty work. Trash Kucinich and yet one wonders if he's that insignificant why would they bother.

[You caught us. We so desperately fear a Kookcinich campaign that we are now trying to kill it in the cradle with mockery thanx to ample aid from one William Rivers Pitt.]

Look, as much as I agree with Kucinich on the issues, you simply can't win if... you don't even hire a competent staff. If your senior staff has a higher turnover rate than a McDonald's fast-food joint, something's wrong.

[William Rivers Pitt would be equally incompetent at flipping burgers at Mickey D's.]

Someone like Dennis has a hard enough time getting traction without him screwing it up himself with a horribly disorganized campaign. I met some very good people who worked on Kucinich's campaign staff. Most of them didn't work for him very long.

[Were they as incompetent as Will Pitt?]

P.J. Gladnick? I recognize that name from my Usenet days. Gladnick was a worthless schmuck with a bottomless amount of time to spend on right-wing trolling*. Mr. Pitt shouldn't take this seriously, and neither should anyone else.

[Mr. Pitt shouldn't take his own confession of incompetence seriously.]

Well, shooting the messenger doesn't address the message. Will Pitt's confessional is very real about working for Kucinich's staff. Pitt had no real experience at all with respect to PR work.

[And this DUmmie WINS a Kewpie Doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity!]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

William Rivers Pitt Writes Off John Kerry

He's on a roll! After months of being in a dry spell of doing nothing but copy & pasting dull news stories and even duller Democrat policy papers, Pied Piper Pitt is back in action with his second DUFUable post in two days. In this DUmmie THREAD titled, "The writing on the wall is getting clearer for Kerry and an '08 run," Pitt in effect writes off Kerry's chances by posting a Boston Globe ARTICLE in which Teddy Kennedy indicates that he might not support Kerry this time around. This is Pitt's way of saying that he has finally gotten in touch with reality and has figured out that there is no chance that Kerry will ever hire him for a Presidential campaign, especially after his recent ADMISSION of personal incompetence. Of course, an element of anger against Kerry for failing to see Pitt's previous sense of his own brilliance is probably a strong factor here and this is Pitt's way of backstabbing Kerry just like he has already betrayed Dennis Kucinich. The question is WHERE does Pitt go from here? True, he provides loads of comedic entertainment for the readers of the DUmmie FUnnies but it is not something of which he can make a career. Investigative journalism? We saw where that went with his Karl Rove scoop last May 12. As far as writing books, outside of providing therapeutic material for patients of insomniac wards, that is also a dead end. And, of course, we know that teaching is out for Will for reasons best unsaid. Is there an opening for a bartending job at Bukowski's? Come to think of it, my teetotalling bartender uncle Marty, would caution against hiring bartenders who indulge themselves in alcoholic endeavors. So let us now watch Pied Piper Pitt write off John Kerry in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, who may soon be endorsing a Presidential candidate whose identity will shock all, is in the [brackets]:

The writing on the wall is getting clearer for Kerry and an '08 run.

[The writing on the wall is getting clearer for Willie and any future career.]

Kerry and Kennedy have been political partners for approximately ten billion years. For Kerry, this statement below is pretty much the political equivalent of finding three flat tires on his car right before a trans-continental road trip.

[It's still better than finding out your car had four flat tires on the road trip to nowhere last May 12.]

Kennedy drops support for a Kerry presidential run in '08
By Rick Klein, Globe Staff December 11, 2006

WASHINGTON --Senator Edward M. Kennedy Monday dropped his public commitment to support Senator John F. Kerry in a 2008 presidential race, saying that he won't wait "indefinitely" for Kerry to declare his intentions while the Democratic primary field takes shape.

Kennedy said he doesn't currently plan to endorse another candidate and still might support Kerry if Kerry decides to run. But in an hourlong interview with the Globe's Washington bureau, Kennedy offered strong praise for two of Kerry's possible presidential rivals: senators Barack Obama of Illinois and Hillary Rodham Clinton of New York, calling them "formidable figures" who are connecting with rank-and-file Democrats.

Kennedy said his oft-stated commitment to support Kerry again was based on the assumption that Kerry would state his intentions by early 2007. Since Kerry pushed back his decision in the wake of following an election-eve "botched joke" that damaged his public standing, however, Kennedy said he has informed Kerry that he may get behind another Democrat for president.

"I was under more of the impression before that he was going to run and was waiting in time (to declare his candidacy), but now he's deferred that decision," Kennedy said. "I have no plans of supporting anyone else at this juncture. I'm also not going to just wait indefinitely until he's made a judgment or a decision."

Kennedy's comments come at a difficult time for Kerry. Early polls show him far behind the leading Democrats in potential presidential fields, and many party activists want Democrats to look for a fresh face in 2008.

Aides and associates said Kerry has been assessing the political fallout from his comment _ eight days before midterm elections _ suggesting that poor students "get stuck in Iraq." When Republicans blasted him for insulting the troops, Kerry apologized, calling it a "botched joke" meant for President Bush.

[Kennedy has assured Kerry that he will be swimming across the Chappaquiddick Channel to find an emergency team to rescue Lurch's sinking campaign. And now to hear from the rest of the DUmmies...]

Okay, I will take the first flame-thrower shots here. Good for you Ted. We need better than the same old crap.

[Teddy has Kerry's back.]

I admire Kucinich but he has "Dukakis" written all over him.

[He has DU-Kaka written all over him.]

Kerry offers an opportunity for a genuine new kind of Democrat. someone who is his own man.Not only that but someone who gets it right most of the time and could actually lead this country. He is by far the most qualified candidate.

[Is that you, John Kerry?]

I gave a bunch -- $$ and time I was on on the phone, booking a flight to OH when his concession was announced. Talk about a kick in the guts.

[You're only $10 away from being kicked in the guts again.]

Time to move on, John. You tried, now let others carry the torch in '08

[Kerry can now only stand by himself on shore and watch the Barack Obama Superstar wake wash past him.]

He had his chance and f*cked it up.

[Kerry or Pitt?]

Kerry is running until he says he isn't. Kennedy still supports him!

[Until he doesn't.]

Not only witll Kerry not run for prez in 08, he won't run again for Senate. He is so unhappy that he could not defend what he felt was most important to him: the honor of his service in Vietnam. That is so sad, but it is true. It comes from one of his closest political advisors.

[It's kind of hard to stay in the Senate when even your fellow Democrats there diss you.]

Kerry could change his mind.

[The sun could rise in the morning.]

Jeez. Now I feel dumb for having posted it.

[Pied Piper Pitt, taking a cue from his non-mentor, Kerry, has flip-flopped before we even reach the end of this thread.]

You only have to read in between the lines to know that Ted is really saying. Don't waste your time, John!

[Don't waste your time, Will!]

He still doesn't have that knack of connecting. He's too stiff, among other things.

[Yeah but his jockstrap is still larger than yours.]

Mr Pitt, you should know better than to jump the gun on anything reported in the media.

[We all know how Mr. Pitt resisted the temptation to jump the gun on reporting Karl Rove's indictment last May 12.]

(You can now access the DUmmie FUnnies simply by typing "DUmmieFUnnies.Com" into your URL address box.)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Christmas is coming soon I have the PERFECT Christmas gift item for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! So feel good about purchasing an AMERICAN MADE toy which makes the perfect Christmas or birthday gift. The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

William Rivers Pitt Confesses Personal Incompetence

Heeeeee's BAAAAAAAAACK!!! After months of being in a dry spell, our favorite DUmmie to DUFU, Pied Piper Pitt, is back in form again. Many have asked me why I haven't DUFUed Pitt in such a long time. The reason is simple. In the months following the Karl Rove non-indictment, Pitt has been in a state of shock to such an extent that he has laid low by merely copy & pasting dull news stories and even duller Democrat policy positions. Yes, Pitt is also incredibly boring but at least his work is ORIGINAL as he pompously tries, in way too many words, to make it all about himself. Fortunately, Pitt has emerged from hibernation and presented us with this comedically enjoyable DUmmie THREAD titled, "On the draft, Obama in '08, Kucinich, and other matters..." What is really fascinating about this thread is the startling admission that he was a totally INCOMPETENT press secretary when working briefly for Dennis Kucinich early in '04. So why this out-of-character humility on the part of Pied Piper Pitt? Simple. It is much better to pretend that you were merely incompetent than to admit what you really were---DEVIOUS. That's right. Pitt only worked a few weeks as a press secretary for Kucinich because the Evil Elf discovered that Pitt was betraying him by feeding inside campaign info to the Kerry camp in a pathetic effort to ingratiate himself with Mama T's Boy Toy. So let us now watch Pied Piper Pitt attempt to sidestep controversy by pleading guilty to incomepetence in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, welcoming our favorite DUmmie back into the DUFU fold, is in the [brackets]:

On the draft, Obama in '08, Kucinich, and other matters...

[That will NOT be including an admission of backstabbing the Evil Elf.]

The draft

[The draft beer is great at Bukowki's. It is the last thing I remember before passing out for the night.]

The idea of a return of the draft has been a concern around here for several days, and for good reason. Understand, however, that barring some massive calamity - an invasion of flesh-eating aliens or the Earth crashing into the sun - there will be no draft. Not because there aren't politicians who want it, but because the military simply will not stand for it.

[WOW! There WON'T be a draft? Thanx for that groundbreaking information, Will. It ranks right up there with your scoop about the Rove indictment last May 12.]

The military nowadays is a hell of a lot different from the one we had the last time there was a draft. Back then, it took about eight weeks or so of boot camp to "make" a soldier. Today, because of the new training, tactics and equipment, it takes months (if not years) to make a soldier. An influx of green, raw, non-volunteer recruits would absolutely shatter the system and wreck virtually every branch of the service.

[Thanx for CONTINUING to tell us that there won't be a draft. Continue beating that dead horse...]

The brass know this, and want no part of it, and will not stand for it. Rangel knows this, too, I am sure, which is why his call for a draft was almost certainly political posturing designed to highlight the Iraq situation and the "rich man's war, poor man's fight" phenomenon. There will be no draft.

[GASP! You mean that Rangle actually engages in political posturing? Hard to believe.]

Obama

[Say that name with worshipful eyes.]

Obama in '08 feels, to me, like a new Senator thinking about running for Vice-President. This is incredibly common: a lot of the candidates in any general election aren't actually running for the Oval Office, because they know they won't get it, but want to position themselves for either the VP spot or a cabinet position. I get the sense that this may be the drift of Obama's thinking; he hasn't been around long enough, perhaps, to seriously consider the top spot, but as VP would be well-positioned to take the reins after someone else's term.

[Sorry Pitt but there are way too many other Obama Acolytes ahead of you in line so you can forget about joining the Obama campaign, especially after that May 12 "incident."]

Given this assumption, savor the flavor: Edwards/Obama, Gore/Obama, Clark/Obama, Boxer/Obama, Clinton/Obama, etc. He would be fantastic on any campaign trail as the second voice on the ticket, I think.

[This is fascinating for what it DOESN'T say, namely "Kerry/Obama." It looks like even Pitt has written off Lurch. No wonder Will has been so glum lately. No campaign for him to latch onto like a parasite.]

Dennis

[You can be even more informal and just call him Evil Elf.]

The announcement that Dennis Kucinich will run for President in '08 has been met with a great chorus of approving voices here. It will be very important to have a voice and a perspective like his in the race - "Hi, my name's Dennis, and I was totally right about the war all the way back in 2002" - but I have one caveat to offer that I hope you decide to take very seriously.

[Taking you seriously is hard to do, Pitt, but we'll try.]

I worked for a litle while as the Kucinich Press Secretary during the '04 run, as some of you might recall. Thanks to a variety of outside and internal circumstances, combined with my own utter lack of experience and what has to be called my rank incompetence in a position I had no grounding for, I am pretty sure you can pen me into The Book as the Worst National Campaign Press Secretary In The History Of All Known Universes.

[I think we can also pen you into The Book as the Worst Writer In The History Of All Known Universes.]

Therefore, I will put this very simply: watch the Kucinich campaign closely. If they start hiring people like me on as main staffers, be very, very, very concerned. No matter how solid a candidate may be, a campaign can die in the cradle if the staffers don't know what they are doing. If these kind of hires start happening, you are going have to wonder what the point of the exercise is, because winning anything won't be on the menu. Period.

[So you are condemning the Kucinich campaign for hiring incompetent fools like you. This sounds quite humble until you realize that it is better than admitting to rank deviousness for backstabbing the Kucinich campaign by feeding inside info to the Kerry camp while acting as the press secretary for the Evil Elf. Yes, much better to be thought of as merely incompetent than as a devious backstabber.]

'Nuff said. Cheers.

['Nuff said. Laughter. And now to hear from the Pied Piper's fellow DUmmies...]

so you admit you didn't know what you were doing while K's press secretary, and somehow that should quell support for Kucinich here? huh?

[Don't support Dennis Kucinich because he was stupid enought to hire me.]

Well, think about it. Say you're running a national campaign for high office. Would you hire someone who had no experience in the job? I'm not worried about how I look in this, because I don't matter. But if someone is running for essentially the office of national administrator, the ability to pick staff is kind of important.

[Pied Piper Pitt, in a pathetic attempt to escape scorn for backstabbing the Evil Elf, has in the process made himself unemployable in any other poltical campaign in the future. Any candidate who now hires Pitt will be condemned for stupidity in hiring such a self-confessed incompetent thanx to Pitt's own admission.]

well you must have done some kind of convincing...
on your resume or otherwise. sorry, but I truly don't understand how your shortcomings for that job back then, reflects on Anything Kucinich says today.

[The Evil Elf is sure going to appreciate that non-endorsement by Pitt. Not only did the Pied Piper backstab the Kucinich campaign but he continues to pour poison on Dennis to this day.]

It's a long story that I'm not getting into right now. But if the idea that competence in picking competent staff isn't an important skill set for a candidate or an administrator doesn't resonate with you, probably nothing else I say will convince you.

[It's a long story involving devious backstabbing that I'm not getting into right now.]

sounds more like your personal story that you've wrapped K in with. what resonates with me is what Kucinich has been saying all along. That's What Matters. not some sideshow of what you consider a dangerous weakness of his (and you being the weakest link!) that I consider rather petty and distractive, actually.

[Remember, it's ALL about Pitt.]

Didn't it have something to do with Kucinich having little money but someone on his staff liking what you wrote with Scott Ritter...about us not going into Iraq?

[Didn't it have something to with Kucinich hiring someone who was willing to backstab him for free?]

Why do you feel you were bad at it

[Because I totally betrayed the trust of my employer.]

No experience. Pretty simple. I'd never done it before, and the heat of a campaign is a crappy time for on-the-job training.

[Don't be so humble, Will. You were actually a pretty good backstabber.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

Obama Orgasma

(UPDATE: In response to my suggestion that the lyrics of I Don't Know How to Love Him from the play and movie, Jesus Christ Superstar be updated for Barack Obama, faithful DUFU reader Charles Henrickson has come up with some INCREDIBLE lyrics set to the tune of that song. This is perhaps the BEST SONG parody I have ever seen. If you know of a radio talk show host, please flag him to the following song, because it is so good that it MUST be performed on the air! Read and enjoy:)

I don't know why I love him,
My Barack, my Obama;
I've been charmed, yes really charmed,
By his trim physique, so slim and sleek--
I'm awed by his mystique.

I don't know why he's running,
I don't see any substance;
No real plan, flash in the pan,
And I've heard such empty words before
That when I close my eyes
He's just a bore.

But I like his face,
And I like his voice;
Makes my heartbeat race!
Makes me feel all moist!
I never thought I'd come to this:
Obama is my choice.

Don't you think it's rather shallow
I should vote for this fellow?
I'm the one who's always been
So pure, so pissed, so feminist;
I don't need men, oh no--
He scares me so.

But I like his face,
And I like his voice;
Makes my heartbeat race!
Makes me feel all moist!
I never thought I'd come to this:
Obama is my choice.

Yet, like in a romance novel,
I'm in love with a male model;
I've got to look!.He signed my book!
My heart runs wild! I'll bear his child!
I want the world to know:
He's my "Big O"!
Obama, go!
I love you so!




Obama Orgasma is sweeping the Democrats! It is an uncritical love that conveniently overlooks the fact that Senator Barack Obama has almost no experience. However that doesn't matter. Obama love continues unabated and is heated up by the fact that the senator seems expert as pouring out feel-good platitudes that are almost meaningless when you analyze them. For this reason, Barack Obama has now become the Warren G. Harding of the Democrat party. Of course, when you look beyond the feel-good platitudes, one will notice that Obama has an almost perfect LIBERAL voting record. On top of that, he was involved in a real estate scandal (most likely leaked by the Clinton people) that would have ruined an unloved Republican in the same shoes. The latest outburst of Obama Orgasma occurred just yesterday in New Hampshire as you can see in this Huffington Post THREAD lovingly titled, "Standing-Room-Only As Obama Sweeps Through New Hampshire..." So let us now watch the Democrats indulge themselves in an orgy of Obama Orgasma in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, resisting the evil right-wing urge to note that his middle name is HUSSEIN, is in the [brackets]:

Standing-Room-Only As Obama Sweeps Through New Hampshire...

[I WUV my Obama! May I touch a piece of his garb? Will I be worthy enough to kiss his tush?]

The political phenomenon known as Sen. Barack Obama (D-Ill.) descended Sunday on the state with the nation's first presidential primary, drawing enthusiastic crowds and trailed by a huge media horde as he continued to stoke interest in a possible bid for the White House in 2008.

[After he SWORE that he wouldn't run for president earlier. But this is Obama. Our true love! He can lie or change his mind at will. Doesn't matter. Not even the fact that he has almost NO experience. WE WUV OBAMA!!!]

It was standing-room-only at a book signing Sunday morning in the seacoast town of Portsmouth, where the 750 available tickets were snapped up within hours of being made available to the public early last week. Here in Manchester, 1,500 people paid $25 apiece to hear him speak at a celebration of the New Hampshire Democratic Party's historic victories in last month's midterm elections.

[Want to make some easy money? Just buy up a bunch of tickets for ANY Obama event this year and you will be sure to make thousands by selling them on eBay for all those buyers hopelessly in love with our inexperienced senator. And now to hear from the HUffies...]

I wish Obama the best...he is an excellent speaker and writer, but needs to hone his Senatorial skills and sponsor some bills...I wish he was ready for prime time, but I think he needs to hold out to '12. Still, he is a bright like among some dull bulbs (and that includes Hillary!).

[GASP! You actually want Obama to DO something? Shame on you! You are NOT worthy of loving him.]

Obama is not ready for prime time!
Despite the hype. This fellow need seasoning and REAL world gravitas before I would support him. BIDE YOUR TIME OBAMA!

[AND WAIT FOR MORE DIRTY LEAKS FROM HILLARY!]

I'm personally very suspicious of this unearned, media-driven, politically correct Obama-mania.It reflects more on our American superficiality and fear of substance, just like Hillary FamousLastName's clueless candidacy, and Dubbya's before that. I don't see that Obama's done anything than word strings of consensual uplifting generalities.

[Hey! If Warren G. Harding could get by with word strings of consensual uplifting generalities, then so can our beloved Obama.]

I think history has shown that personal charisma seems to be exceptionally important to Americans in presidental elections. We need to nominate the candidate with the best chance of beating the GOP candidate in 2008.

[Barack Obama Superstar. All that needs be done now is to update the lyrics of "Don't Know How To Love Him."]

Gore's got more charisma, charm, humor, fame, good looks, and whatever else you think is needed to win, than anyone as far as the eye can see.
And then there's the knowledge, the experience, the courage, the conscience, the worldwide respect...

[And the artificial crotch enhancer socks that Gore stuffs into his pants are bigger than Obama's socks. So there!]

At least he's not Hillary.

[May I place that slogan on an Obama '08 bumper sticker?]

About Obama: how low do American standards have to fall that being able to string together a sentence in correct English now qualifies you for the Oval Office...

[Well, he does have a nice smile. So I guess he is qualified to be president.]

Vilsack? Don't know anthing about him.

[At least Vilsack has the guts to WEAR a Pooh Bear on his head in public.]

Obama has an excellent chance of winning the presidency, and the republicans know that. I took a very scary trip over to the Fox "news" site to see what attack points they are pushing about Obama.... man oh man... they are digging out the dirt early, truly they are. Nasty talking points too.... they wouldnt even bother with him if they didnt think he posed a very serious threat.... they even put togeather a rather nasty video bio about him.... I think he is brilliant and way more qualified than bush ever imagined he was... Obama will run and will probably win.

[Strange that you don't actually SPECIFY what those Fox News "attack points" actually are but no matter.]

Obama is OK, nice guy.

[Good enough for me. Start playing "Hail To The Chief" in his blessed presence.]

I would like to vote for Obama in `12.

[APOSTATE! Why wait? OBAMA '08!]

So I am grateful that Al Gore lived to fight another day, and his day is fast approaching. He won in 2000, he could have won in 2004. Give him Obama as his VP...and if/when the murderous BushCabal dark forces spill Gore's blood on our nation's soul, THEN we will at least have Obama to turn to. Provided he too has not been bought and paid for by those dark bushco forces...a blight on our country and on the world. EXPOSE THEM and put them all in leg irons. Or they will continue their evil deeds.

[Obama served up as a mere gift to Al Gore? Hmmm...]

As my Grandpa used to say, "The Horse that shits fast, doesn't shit long." This will pass as fast as it arrived.

[aka Political Ex-Lax.]

Can someone give me ONE HONEST REASON why Sen. Obama should run for President? As one who is a LIBERAL and an African,I am disheartened that the Democratic party seems to gravitate towards star power, rather than a choice that can win us the White house.

[I'll give you TWO HONEST REASONS. Obama is not only nice but he is okay too.]

Yes, I can. I attended the event in Manchester yesterday. Obama was thoughtful. His words belied the media frenzy. Nobody left the meeting pumped up with Rock Star frenzy. Most left with Sen. Obama's eloquently phrased ideas turning in their heads. It was a very refreshing experience. If Barak Obama decides to run, he'll probably win. If he decides he won't, he'll do exceptional work for the American people anyway. Don't let he media paint the picture for you. Listen to the man yourself. Have the audacity to think for yourself.

[Thus spaketh a love struck Obama groupie.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Christmas is coming soon I have the PERFECT Christmas gift item for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! So feel good about purchasing an AMERICAN MADE toy which makes the perfect Christmas or birthday gift. The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

Impeachment Obsession At Fever Pitch In Leftwing Blogosphere

They just can't let go. Despite the fact that Nancy Pelosi has stated that impeachment will NOT be on the Democrats agenda in the next term, the looney left is now DEMANDING more strenuously than ever that President Bush be impeached. In the narrow view of the Left, a Bush impeachment (overlooking the trial part) would mean that Nancy Pelosi would be immediately installed as president, conveniently forgetting that Dick Cheney would succeed Bush. The few lefties facing this "uncomfortable" fact, believe that Dick Cheney could also be impeached. So let's see. To go to the impeachment stage for Bush would take over a year. The trial in the Senate would then take place early in 2008 where Bush would be ACQUITTED because a conviction would take 16 Republican votes to obtain the necessary two-thirds required by the Constitution. Even if the impossible happened, the impeachment routine would have to be performed all over again for Dick Cheney which would take us up to Jan. 20, 2009. Maybe the Left would be satisfied if their Nancy served for an hour or so on that morning but only in their own alternate reality. These impeachment threads are running rampant in both DUmmieland and KOmmieland but since there are almost 1400 obsessed comments in the latter, today we shall DUFU this KOmmie THREAD titled "Impeachment: you think the world is not watching?" So let us now watch the KOmmie obsess over the impeachment in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, ready to impeach the sanity of the Left, is in the [brackets]:

Impeachment: you think the world is not watching?

[And laughing?]

So it's not politically convenient to try to impeach?

So there will be no price paid for being the worst president ever, apart for the promise of the judgement of history?

So Democrats also think it's okay to go invade another country, to get several hundred thousand of its inhabitants killed, to proudly practice and promote torture around the world, to tear up the Geneva Conventions and a whole load of international treaties, and to go grab random foreigners around the world to put them in Guantanamo and throw away the key?

[Yeah. We just grabbed random foreigners off the streets around the world and tossed them into Gitmo for absolutely no reason. Continue with your rambling nonsense in this therapy session...]

So not only was Bush reelected with a real majority, but the opposition essentially says that what he did is not so profoundly illegal that it deserves to be duly sanctioned?

Way to go.

The world is watching. And it will not forget. Our current leaders may be cowards, but they won't always be there. Haven't you noticed how being anti-American makes you a popular politician and makes you win elections around the world?

[It didn't help the Dixie Chicks in their sales but at least they got Grammy nominations for their anti-Americanism. Now finish off your spew...]

Fear will not be enough when the whole world is convinced that America will not correct its current ways, and that the problem is not just the current administration.

[Sorry. No purges in the USA but let us hear from your fellow sanity-challenged KOmmies...]

Two Words for the case NOT to impeach... Dick Cheney.

[Don't worry. You KOmmies will come up with some unreal scenario to handle that problem.]

You think he wouldn't be found guilty of SOMETHING during those much-needed investigations? Encouraging/enabling war profiteering, at least, not to mention the probable illegalities of his energy task force. Impeach the whole friggin' administration. They've earned it.

[Mass impeachment. Impossible to accomplish constitutionally but why should that stop the KOmmies?]

Seriously. Why can't Cheney be impeached first? Or both at the same time? Can you say President Pelosi?

[Can you say sanity-challenged?]

Please name the 17 Republicans who would vote to remove Bush from office.

[Stop pestering us with inconvenient details!]

All this impeachment talk is premature until the investigations get under way. I suggest we all keep an open mind about whether to impeach until then.

[Lost in all this discussion is the fact that not one KOmmie has given an actual REASON for impeachment.]

I wonder if the world can wait... for Bush to leave office in 2009. I wonder if it can wait another month. He is, and has been, both unfit for office and a danger to civilization for 6 years, and things are deteriorating rapidly.

[How about a speed impeachment where investigations are dropped as unnecessary and you unconstitutionally go straight to a Senate trial requiring only a majority vote for conviction?]

If we impeach Bush, Cheney would become president then we impeach him shortly after that. Or we could do it the other way around. It wouldn't matter.

[Or you can do it all together or the other way around. Plus you can do it unconstituionally. It wouldn't matter.]

What are you going to impeach Cheney on?

[Just make something up. It wouldn't matter.]

secret energy task force

[Obvious grounds for impeachment of Cheney. Oh, and don't overlook that overdue library book of his. Another good reason for impeachment.]

I am convinced the truth is there. I am convinced if the American people ever learn even half of it, the case for impeachment and removal from office will take on a life of its own.

[So let's see. So far you haven't come up with ANY ground for impeachment but somehow believe that if you just keep digging, something will turn up. Oh, and don't forget about Bush jaywalking in downtown Crawford.]

then say goodbye to dems winning an election in 08. shit, if dems so blatantly try to get into power, by throwing a lame duck president who cant do shit out of office, just so they can have power one year earlier at the earliest, then i'm gonna throw my vote away in 08. cos i don't support such blatant a power grab, and i doubt most people would

[And this KOmmie WINS a Kewpie doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity!]

Bush will resign, Cheney will have heart failure keep saying it...

[A touching KOmmie prayer.]

What is Cheney going to be impeached FOR? Nobody ever gets to this point, probably because the whole rube goldberg impeachment drive to make Nancy Pelosi president already looks ridiculous. But I'll bite. What did Cheney do? Shoot someone in the face? Remember, Cheney can't actually ORDER anything, and all his power comes from convincing people in the actual chain of command to do as he wants. So what's his crime?

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

Pass a law requiring him to do his job, and then impeach him for refusing to obey it.

[Posted a KOmmie with a straight face.]

Its been six friggin years, he's got to have ... done something. He's as crooked as the fingers of NFL linemen before the days of Monday Night football. And there is precious little legitimate for a VP to do in such a dysfunctional White House, so he's going to have been up to something disreputable. You can't unteach an old dog bad old tricks.

[Translation: We have absolutely NO PROOF that Cheney did anything illegal but something will turn up if we investigate because we know he is a crook.]

Two Words are 'President Pelosi'. Impeach Bush and as evidence is uncovered, negotiate simultaneous resignation for Cheney in exchange for reduced or immunity from prosecution.

[Without even grounds for impeachment yet, the KOmmies are already arranging a plea bargain to facilitate the inauguration of President Pelosi.]

I have yet to see anyone make...the slightest case that impeachment would hamper, delay or impede whatsoever the Democratic agenda. None. Not from you, not from Kos, not from anyone.

[I have yet to see anyone make the slightest case for impeachment based on any actual evidence. We already know, according to numerous leftwing scholars in 1998, that perjury is NOT grounds for impeachment so you will have to look in other directions than that.]

If necessary hire a gang of private detectives when he's out of office and have him arrested for stepping on the cracks in the pavement. Be petty, find something that he can be taken down for, and keep after him whenever he steps foot outside his house. Make life impossible for him

[Yes! That's the trick! BE PETTY!!!]

It's about crime and punishment, justice and the rule of law.

[Wrong! It's about being petty.]

Why can't GWB be prosecuted once he leaves office? What stops us from making sure he gets to La Hague? Impeachment is a distraction, won't be a solution.

[Be petty! Send him to the Hague to stand trial for stepping on cracks on the pavement.]

Investigate and keep our mouths shut to avoid alerting the wingnuts is the fricking plan.

[Shh! Don't tell anybody that we are only going to investigate for the sole reason of going on a fishing expedition to hopefully find the grounds for impeachment that have not yet appeared.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Christmas is coming soon I have the PERFECT Christmas gift item for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! So feel good about purchasing an AMERICAN MADE toy which makes the perfect Christmas or birthday gift. The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

DUmmies Are NOT Amused

Good news! The DUmmie FUnnies has NOT been chosen to be a finalist in the 2006 Weblog Awards thus preventing any possibilty that it could be a winner in the Humor category this year. Huh? So how could being a loser be good news? Well, at first I was completely bummed out about not being chosen as a finalist but then I realized that this is not the year to win that award. Next year is the time to win the Best Humor Blog Award because the awards ceremonies will be taking place for the first time in Las Vegas in November. Since the winner of one year almost never wins the following year, my chances of winning in 2007, when it really COUNTS, has gone up dramatically as a result. Also I am already generating a bit of interest in my idea of putting myself on display at the Las Vegas BlogWorld Convention (where the awards ceremonies will take place) in an exihibit booth as an example of the "Bloggo Sapien" species. Bloggo Sapiens thrive in their habitat of a computer desk, reclining chair, and glowing monitor. Plus they are clad only in a T-shirt and boxer trunk underpants as I would be as part of the Bloggo Sapien zoo exhibit. The main source of nourishment for Bloggo Sapiens is a constantly filled mug of coffee. So if you plan to attend the 2007 BlogWorld Convention (and Weblog Awards ceremony) in Las Vegas be sure to visit the Bloggo Sapien exhibit.

And speaking of humor, apparently the DUmmies have NONE as you can see in this THREAD angrily titled, "WTF?????" What happened is that a vicious rightwing Republican father of a clueless DUmmie sent him a FUnnie Christmas card which OUTRAGED the DUmmie who is now seeking counseling in DUmmieland on how to respond. I don't what is FUnnier, the FUnnie Christmas card or the angry response of the DUmmie. So let us now read the Christmas card and the DUmmie response in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, already fantasizing about his coronation in Las Vegas next November as the Emperor Of All The Humor Blogospheres, is in the [brackets]:

WTF?????

[Stand by for DUmmie outrage over the "crime of the century."]

Help! My dumb-ass Republican dad, sent me this horrible little Christmas greeting today. I am a bit pissed off about it, and would like to return the gesture!!! Does anyone know of a good website, or have a nice little poem or saying, that I could use to send to him??

[Help! I'm too much of a dumb-ass to respond in kind to my Republican dad's sense of humor so I need help from equally clueless fellow DUmmies!!!]

For Our Democratic Friends & Family:

"Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. We also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. And without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee. By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher."

For Our Republican Friends & Family:

Here's wishing all of You a

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year and may GOD bless you all!!

[LOL! And this is what caused the conniption fit in this DUmmie who is now completely UNABLE to respond to humor in kind.]

Maybe he just thinks it's funny

[Now how could anyone possibly get that idea?]

You don't understand. He is really mean when it comes to politics. Bill O and Rush are his idols. He sent this to me out of spite!! I just would like to jab back at him for once!

[DADA!!! You always get the better of me in the humor department! Can't I win for once!]

Maybe you two need to stop discussing politics if this is such an issue for you.

[That plan sure works in my family.]

OK, then maybe this year you should celebrate Festivus.
That way you can air your grievances and challenge him to some feats of strength.

[Maybe you should celebrate Leftivus and beat your dad in a bile producing contest.]

I can't think of anything off hand, but I'll think about it.

[Send us a postcard when you finally get a clue.]

You can't teach a conservative comedy. You're more likely to teach a dog trigonometry.

[Or teaching a DUmmie sanity.]

For republican friends and family - Allow me to offer a free ride to the Army Recruiting Station. And I'll be sure to pick up a magnetic yellow ribbon to my put on my car for you.

[For DUmmie friends and family - Allow me to offer a free ride to the sanitarium. And I'll be sure to pick up a magnetic leather strip to put in your foaming mouth.]

Tell him HAPPY SATURNALIA! and promise to remember him to the goddess while you're dancing naked around the pagan fertility symbol in your living room.

[At least you just put a big smile on ben burch's face.]

Maybe your adopted and he is not your father really. I cannot imagine sending something like that to my son or daugher even if they were evil republicans.

[Maybe "your" in an alternate universe.]

For Our Racist Republican Friends & Family:
Here's wish you a WHITE Christmas.

[Quoteth the inarticulate DUmmie about to be disowned by his family.]

Tell your dad you find him as you do his greeting, shallow as an Earl Scheib paint job.

[Hey! I resent that remark you just made about Tammy Faye Bakker's makeup artist.]

Merry Christmas to all republicans a.k.a. Christians from Hell.

[HA! HA! HA! What an incredibly subtle wit you have there!]

Order him a subscription to "The Nation" for X-mas.
And a copy of Howard Zinn's "A Peoples History of The United States, 1492-Present".

[And don't forget to present him with a printout of one of Pied Piper Pitt's many copy & paste arcane policy papers that he has been posting lately in DUmmieland.

A punch your dad's mouth, destroy all presents he gives you so he will not get his money back, then disown him. If he doesn't accept you for you, then he is not a good father.

[Ah! The soft touch always works.]

To our Republican friends... Here's hoping you can take a moment off from slaughtering people around the world, exploding the national deficit, giving tax breaks to billionaires, rigging elections, raping the environment and poisoning the public discourse long enough to enjoy a happy, peaceful and prosperous holiday, no matter what your religious affiliation or lack thereof.

[No good. You left out the part about starving the cheeeeldrun.]

Respond back and say... "Happy Kwanza!"

[Celebrated almost everywhere EXCEPT in Africa.]

Because he's your father I'll presume he has other redeeming qualities - but I think sending you that email just sucks. I don't know what is wrong with people who think it's cute to ridicule their own kids. This is a prime example of shittier behavior than using a curse word and why I can't stand hypocrites who will do garbage like this while pompously patting themselves on the back for not cussing.

[Ridicule a DUmmie? Whoever heard of such a thing?]

Send him a picture of Osama Bin Laden and tell him that JESUS CHRIST HIMSELF looked Pretty Much like HIM..

[That was the BDS INFECTED DUmmie symbolman who somehow knows what Jesus looked like.]

(You can now access the DUmmie FUnnies simply by typing "DUmmieFUnnies.Com" into your URL address box.)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

DUmmies WUV Hugo Chavez For Shutting Down The Press

The DUmmies are expressing their true WUV for Venezuelan thug, Hugo Chavez, for shutting down the press on the heels of his election victory last night. You can see this DUmmie WUV for yourself in this THREAD titled, "Telemundo: Venezuela Halts Transmission." Yes, the Chavez regime shut down coverage by Telemundo of the Venezuelan election and the most of the DUmmies have given a big thumbs up to this press clampdown. These are the same DUmmies that claim that the EVIL Bush regime controls the press here despite what what we see daily reported on most of the major networks. So let us now watch the DUmmies gaze lovingly upon Hugo Chavez in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, hoping there is no clampdown on future Miss Venezuelas entering the Miss Universe contest, is in the [brackets]:

Telemundo: Venezuela Halts Transmission

[VIVA HUGO!!!]

CARACAS, Venezuela — Officials identifying themselves as members of a state regulatory agency forced the U.S.-based Spanish-language TV network Telemundo to halt transmission Sunday of its presidential election coverage.

"We're surprised by this," said Pablo Iacub, a member of Telemundo's eight-person team, which arrived last week. "We only want to do our work," he said by telephone.

At least six people who identified themselves as members of the National Commission of Telecommunications (CONATEL), which regulates electronic media in Venezuela, arrived Sunday afternoon at the hotel from which Telemundo had been transmitting since Friday, said Iacub.

The officials said the network needed permission to transmit and lacking such could not, he said. Iacub said he was unaware of such a requirement but that the Telemundo journalists were accredited with Venezuela's national elections council.

Iacub said the Telemundo team asked how they could obtain permission and, after an hour, were told that they would not be able to transmit.

[The Bolshevik Revolution will NOT be televised.]

He shut down GE the arms dealer. So what. I wish we could do that.

[DUmmies wish they could shut down all contrary political thought.]

Yeah, that'll kickstart the economy. Shut down GE. They have $160 billion in sales annually in just about every line of business you can think of, and employ tens of thousands of people, paying them well and providing good benefits. However, one segment of their business deals with weapons so we should shut the entire company down! The poeple who work there will just have to take one for the team, but I'm sure they'll understand.

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

Chavez is fighting U.S. interference in his country's affairs..
..The chimp's black 0ps f*ckers are there, trying to influence the election. The media there is infiltrated with chimpistas. F*ck 'em!

[LOL! "Chimpistas." I have to remember that one for future use.]

under Perez the US oil companies ran Venezuela..and only the top echelon of people of Venezuela benefitted.. i saw rich Venezuelan men put cigarettes out on little children for the pure sport of it ..for a Bolivar..it was heart breaking...and they laughed when i tried to stop them from doing so..

[Another well-documented DUmmie "fact." Before Chavez came on the scene, rich Venezuelans put their cigarettes out on little children for laughs. Oh, and may I use your empty skull for an ashtray?]

It sounded as if they believed their rule would NEVER end during the time you were there. I hope it is never allowed again, and that the Venezuelan people will be able to keep Venezuela free for Venezuelans.

[Translation: No one will be allowed to rule in Venezuela except the Chavistas. No Chimpistas allowed.]

The concept of press freedom is a rather ridiculous notion when "the press" is a large corporate interest only concerned with image creation and not real reporting.

[Thanx for giving us a sneak preview excuse for when the Left tries the same stunt here.]

We have freedom of the press. Freedom to lie, distort, gung ho on a repubican agenda, interview 2 repubics for every Democrat, protect their own corporate interests. Shut down? No. Break up the corporate monopoly - yes.

[Thanx for giving us the sneak preview rationale for shutting down the press here. See, they aren't really shutting down the press. The Left is merely breaking up a corporate monopoly.]

We have freedom of the owners of the mega media to propagandize. As to Faux News, it should be shut down for it is nothing more than a rightwing propaganda arm. The airwaves belongs to the people, not the mega media corporations.

[That, folks, was DUmmie IndianaGreen, a college professor in the midwest. I wonder if she teaches journalism?]

Exactly, I couldn't have said it better. Fox "news" in NOT and never was News. It's RW Opinion and Propaganda.

[Admit it. You are really student in DUmmie IndianaGreen's class and you just want to butter her up to get an easy "A".]

I want it shut down! It's not news. They have NO right to pretend to be "news", while they spout the White House talking points 24/7. We the people should have taken it upon ourselves to shut them down long ago. It still may have to happen that way.

[That was DUmmie Webster Green. Could he be DUmmie IndianaGreen's hubbie?]

I suggest you read the first amendment. Of course it's news. It's slanted and has a right wing POV, not mention a high sleaze factor, but it's about freedom of speech, and you folks who want to shut it down, are profounndly wrong and deeply, and I do mean deeply, anti-democratic. You scare me more than Fos news.

[And yet you remain a DUmmie, DUmmie.]

Bullshit! It is the opposite of free speech. The assholes with all the money own all the news outlets, and control what we are allowed to hear. That is not free speech!

[DUmmie Webster Green again whispiring sweet leftist nothings into DUmmie IndianaGreen's ear.]

Shut down?; No; Held Accountable for lies and slander...?
YES! There used to be rules about honesty in the business of journalism. We all can see what happened when these rules were relaxed. A news organization owned by an arms dealer can spew it's dihonest, fearmongering propaganda, whereever it wills it without fear of prosecution..

["Shut down" redefined as "held accountable" according to the DUmmie dictionary. Webster's Green dictionary.]

It's not news if it's not the TRUTH. It is chicanery, perception molding, propaganda, lies, half-truths, deceit, and if it's not the TRUTH, it is NOT NEWS. It is NOT actual honest communication. The fact they can have open access to the helpless minds of American idiots (until they learn to evaluate what the hell they are being told!) and that they ABUSE that intimate access shouldn't be allowed. NEWS ONLY IF IT'S THE TRUTH. Anything else is political crap and manipulation, and it takes advantage of the public's ignorance to deceive it.

[In case you folks thought this was ONLY about Venezuela, it's not. This is what the DUmmies plan for America, or Amerikka as they call it.]

I think this is Hugo Chavez's point. He is going to have to do unpopular acts to stabilize his country. Strong men do.

[Another DUmmie excuse for shutting down the press. They merely want to "stabilize" the country.]

If a foreign television station came into the US and started broadcasting on election night, the entire US government would storm that foreign television station and shut it down.

[Oh yeah. The foreign press is NEVER allowed to broadcast in the USA on election night. And that's a FACT, Jack!]

You're kidding right? Foreign stations from every part of the globe broadcast from the US during elections.

[Ugly truth is not permitted in DUmmieland you LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

Telemundo is OWNED by America's powerful elite. Telemundo wanted to broadcast BushCo's word TO Venezuela. Think of Fox New on steroids.

[Think of DUmmies on Thorazine.]

He didn't say he wanted to end private press. He said he wanted to ask THE PEOPLE if they wanted those SUBVERSIVE media outlets to be shut down.

[Gee! I wonder what the answer from THE PEOPLE will be when Chavez asks that question from his balcony?]

Did he say corporate press or private press. There is a difference.

[Better check the fine print.]

Do you seriously think that the private press in Venezuela should be shut down?

[A silly question to pose in DUmmieland.]

i would feel alot more comfortable if the FCC would hold fox accountable to telling truth instead of propaganda! free does not mean lie... the air time in the USA is owned by each and every American..the media is given our air time to be the fourth estate..they have a responsibility to tell the American people the truth..if they do not and deliberatley lie..they should be removed from using our air time free! they should be held accountable...

[Unfortunately for this DUmmie, Fox News is on CABLE, not on the airwaves.]

And just who owns Telemundo?

[Chimpistas?]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

Severe BDS Outbreak In DUmmieland

Quick! Contact the CDC. There is a severe BDS (Bush Derangement Syndrome) outbreak in DUmmieland. It has already affected the interiors of the DUmmie craniums and has caused their brain cells to burst. The symptoms of BDS are a complete loss of the ability to reason or communicate normally. Sufferers will rant uncontrollably as foam pours out of their mouths. Unfortunately there is no known cure for BDS. If you see a BDS patient ranting in the streets, please quarantine him at the nearest Wal-Mart Detention Center. We now bring you a close up look at the latest DUmmie outbreak of BDS in this THREAD with the BDS affected title of "Put that SOB in JAIL NOW! Defund AF One! Lockdown the White House! Stop HIM!" So let us now watch the Patient Zero of BDS, DUmmie symbolman, demonstrate the classic BDS symptoms in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, reading up on the Andromeda Pain, is in the [brackets]:



Put that SOB in JAIL NOW! Defund AF One! Lockdown the White House! Stop HIM!

[Confine that BDS patient NOW! Break out Lithium treatment! Lockdown the Meds! Treat HIM!]

I'm SO SICK of all this pussyfooting about this Lying Thieving CROOK in the White House playing FOOTSIES with all the CORPORATIONS while our Sons and Daughters DIE and DIE and DIE!

[Insert the leather strap while you CRY and CRY and CRY!]

WE KNOW what he's doing, there's MORE than enough PROOF, yet this whole Bullshit Pretention keeps going on, this VAST DENIAL, this PLAYING BY THE RULES GAME while THEY change the RULES to fit their Looting of the Treasury!

[Kindly mop up your rabid foam when exiting the sanitarium.]

The media writes these namby pamby articles about how Bush is "uncurious" and now he SEEMS "hard headed", his "gut instincts" SEEM to have led US down some kind of WRONG PATH! He's either CRAZY (and the Constitution says we can STOP a crazy pResident), or he's just plain EVIL...

[We already know you are just plain NUTS!!!]

HE's a CRIMINAL, he's NOT A KING, and he's SWORN to UPHOLD the Constitution and has done NONE OF IT, None at ALL.

[The same Constitution you DUmmies were calling a piece of trash just YESTERDAY?]


He's LIED and been caught at it, CONSTANTLY. LIED TO CONGRESS, which is ILLEGAL.

[It sounds like you also suffer from CDS: Clinton Derangement Syndrome.]

He keeps PUTTING OFF doing anything until the last drop of Blood will be spilled, the last gasp of air is loosed from the LAST American Troop, or the last Iraqi CHILD, blown to bits in this GAME they are Playing, the Last drop of oil is safely in an Oil Baron's CUP.

[Rabies shots will be just be the appetizer of your intensive BDS treatment.]

SOMEONE CUT THE CRAP, and get this guy OFF the streets!! You don't let a wild animal run around with an automatic weapon, saying, "Oh well, he's just crazy or something, and eventually he'll run out of bullets I guess.."

[Warning! Your Depends is reaching critical mass and must be changed soon!]

DEFUND the Air Force One. Put an ARMED GUARD at the Door of the White House. CUT OFF HIS PHONE. TELL THE TRUTH about what he's doing.

[Mommy has some hot toddy laced with chloroform for our widdle symbolman.]

STOP HIM, he's killing and starving hundreds of thousands, and STEALING from ALL OF US. IT IS OBVIOUS. IT IS A FACT.

[AS OBVIOUS A FACT AS...AS GLOBAL WARMING!!!]

There HAS to be some LEGAL and NONVIOLENT WAY, some Emergency Measure that can be INVOKED NOW.

[Thumping over the head with a large club is a legal way to handle severe BDS.]

THIS is INSANITY and it's being ALLOWED and WE KNOW BETTER, the WOrld Knows Better, the Troops Know better.

[Methinks your audition to enter Happy Farms will be successful.]

It's MONSTEROUS and must end NOW!

[NO! NO! Don't end your comedy act now! You're on a roll!]

Cut off HIS FUNDING, DO SOMETHING, the insanity must END.

[DUmmie symbolman has such a charming glare in his crazed eyes when he rants like a madman.]

I'm sick of the "civilized" GAMES being played out, like ALL IS WELL. ALL IS NOT WELL.

[Just go out the door with the nice men in the white coats and ALL WILL BE WELL.]

End of Rant. Hopefully not the End of the World before these CREATURES Kill and starve us ALL.

[Too late. Were all dead now. And now to hear from the BDS infected comrades of DUmmie symbolman...]

HERE HERE. I think even some of 'them' are realizing he's rogue and must be stopped. It's really amazing how those of us who felt crazy and that we were banging our heads against the wall are having to watch as prophecies come true about Bush in ways we could never imagine.

[Good. Good. The first step on the road to recovery is the recognition that you are crazy.]

F*CK Laura's CLOTHES, and F*CK Bush. Horseshit. HE's More like one of the FOUR HORSEMEN, you don't WRITE about what THEY are WEARING, or how SAD they are.. they are PESTILANCE, you get RID Of them. By all Legal means of course, but let's CUT the CRAP and have a REAL Conversation about what the HELL IS GOING ON in this COUNTRY, eh?

[That was DUmmie symbolman again demonstrating that he can't be bested in the insanity department.]

they won't show disemboweled or dismembered Iraqis. They don't give you the taste, feel, and smell of ENDLESS WAR and STRIFE caused by that hateful arrogant murderer Bush who insults all enlightened institutions of law and order.

[Well, at least you are showing us a disembodied brain.]

I've been fighting these bastards for 6 years with EVERY DIME I OWN. ALl of my SWEAT in so many venues, and now that Bush's INSTALLED Puppets in Iraq are schemeing with IRAN, and Bush is IRREVELANT, what the F*CK are we DOING? He runs around clowning all over the world and THAT IS OKAY? His Baker run board says, "Oh, we need to LEAVE, but not now, whenever would be fine..' and BUSH SAYS NO? Who the HELL IS this ASSHOLE, and WHAT is HE doing in OUR Sacred White House? Time to take out the TRASH is NOW. Congress needs to hold an emergency Meeting to discuss the Constitional CRISIS occurring in this Nation, that we have an INSANE person in the WHite House, and there are LEGAL Constitutional Measures for REMOVING HIM POSTE HASTE. Thanks for your post, I AM Angry, more than ever, and have been WAY ahead of the Hockey Puck for Many Years. LET'S ROLL, DEMAND that CONGRESS REMOVE HIM NOW.

[Time for your daily Thorazine OD, DUmmie symbolman.]

Time to ship a couple million Guy Fawkes masks to the good people of the DC area, if you get my drift.

[Does that include the kewl Guy Fawkes cape and knife set?]

I saw Laura on TV showing off the White House Christmas decorations and wanted to SCREAM.

[Sounds like a War Crime to me. TO THE HAGUE!!!]

Let's get the Wheels rolling, and NOW.

[Let's get the Screws loose, and NOW.]

USE the CONSTITUTION, THERE is a MEASURE there for an INSANE president. Get him out NOW.

[THERE is no MEASURE in the CONSITUTION for an INSANE DUmmie since that term is redundant.]

Mob justice is how American was founded........... If our forefathers had not overthrown the govt we would be bowing before the Queen as we speak.

[Ben Burch bows before a Queen every day.]

Now find one scholar who will back up this kind of ridiculous rant.

[Or even one shrink.]

Mob justice is better than no justice

[This saying is enshrined in the DUmmie Hall of Justice.]

But these constant threads of unrealistic hysteria accomplish nothing but giving others fodder to think us to be lunatics.

[Hee! Hee! Now how could we possibly get that idea?]

I consider it shocking that this kind of nonsensical
ranting gets delerious rave reviews, as if the OP contained any wisdom whatsoever.

[DUmmie symbolman is the symbol of DUmmieland.]

Symbolman you can go on and on, I like reading what you write. I want it so bad, so bad. I feel hopeless to do anything but give up hope I will not. I always knew I loved my country but I didn't know I loved her as I do, she's like a mother and she is being violated by this crew and I want justice, not a gloss over, real justice. This madman must be stopped for mankind if not for us

[One of symbolman's many DUmmie groupies.]

As a nation at this moment in history, we are no better than Nazi Germany of the late 40's. This nation as it exists currently is a threat to the rest of the world. By allowing this administration to conduct such aggressive foreign policy, and continue to go on unchecked is, in itself, criminal. Complacency must end. The time for peaceful dialog is over. I for one do not wish to go on supporting this. Call you congressmen, senators, representative's and demand that this freak be removed today. The world hate us boy's and girl's. That is a cold hard fact, and a reality that makes me feel far less secure now than any terrorist attack ever has. We need to deal with this situation now before World War 3 is officially declared, AGAINST US.

[Nazi Germany of the late 40's? I guess you were too zoned out on Thorazine to pay attention in history class.]

OHHHH THANK YOU SYMBOLMAN!! I NEEDED THAT RANT!!

[Enjoy your post-orgasmic cigarette.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Christmas is coming soon I have the PERFECT Christmas gift item for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! So feel good about purchasing an AMERICAN MADE toy which makes the perfect Christmas or birthday gift. The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

p.s. Check out what one of our happy customers had to SAY about the amazing helicopter kite.

"Is there any way to ban Limbaugh, O'Reilly and their ilk from the airwaves?"

Poor widdle DUmmies. Their much hyped Air America is about to leave the airwaves forever due to horrible ratings. The only major "progressive" national radio show left is Blowhard Ed Shultz who was a faux conservative before "converting" to a faux liberal for bigger bucks. Shultz, who will soon be going head to head against the talk show host he tries to lamely imitate, Rush Limbaugh, even sounds disconnected from the thrust of his own show. Listen to Shultz and you quickly get the feeling that he would much rather be a network sports announcer covering NFL games rather than blabbering about politics that underneath the "progressive" act, frankly bores him. Even most DUmmies consider Shultz to be nothing but a phony play actor. Therefore imagine the DUmmie frustration at Rush Limbaugh continuing to DOMINATE the airwaves as you can see in this THREAD titled, "Is there any way to ban Limbaugh, O'Reilly and their ilk from the airwaves?" Well, so much for any DUmmie pretensions of supporting free speech. That is about as phony as Blowhard Ed's liberal act. As to O'Reilly, I don't know why the DUmmies are even concerned about him. His Fox News show is on cable and therefore not covered by the FCC and O'Reilly's radio show is so deadly dull that it is a wonder that anyone even listens. I listened to O'Reilly's radio show a few times and it always brings to mind that old SCTV comedy routine of Perry Como lying prone on a stage singing, "Am I Still Alive?" Therefore I assume the DUmmie rage must be directly almost enirely against Rush Limbaugh. He is so popular and effective in his show that they MUST find a way to rid him from the airwaves. So let us now watch the DUmmies try to come up with a formula to bypass freedom of speech in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, willing to become a phony liberal for a day like Blowhard Ed if the price is right, is in the [brackets]:

Is there any way to ban Limbaugh, O'Reilly and their ilk from the airwaves?

[Your best chance for that is to carefully peruse the fine print of the McCain-Feingold Campaign Reform Law. It is chock full of provisions limiting free speech.]

This question touches on the first amendment freedom of speech. But what about speech that provides only hatred, propaganda and divisiveness?

[Hate speech as defined by DUmmies is anything that disagrees with their Bolshevik agenda.]

Can there be any doubt that these people have, through their words and support of a corrupt administration, created damage to our constitution, death to American service people and anguish to anyone with a conscience?

[Can there be any doubt that these DUmmies are mentally unstable?]

I'm not a lawyer, so I don't have the slightest clue as to the point where hate speech becomes unconstitutional. But I'd like to hear your opinions on this.

[You are correct. You don't have the slightest clue. And now to hear about the free speech denial schemes from your fellow DUmmies...]

Sure. The airwaves are a public trust. Just have them declared hate speech or obscenity. Which they truly are.

[You'll need for Howard Dean to be made Chairman of the FCC before that ruling can be made.]

have a Congressional committee declare them "terrorists"
and use th Patriot Act to imprison and torture and execute them.

[This DUmmie is kidding only a little bit.]

I can turn off my TV and radio. But that doesn't
solve what I consider to be the damage they are doing to our country, our way of life and to basic human dignity.

[I can choose not to listen to Rush Limbaugh but I find the fact that millions of people out there are listening to him to be INTOLERABLE.]

I don't see trying to squelch them as a viable course of action.

[Couldn't we declare Rush to be an Enemy of the People?]

Sorry, but I will support their right to say the stupidest, most hateful things about me that they want - when we start saying this speech is good and ok, but that speech is bad and outlawed, we slip into some really nasty areas of who gets to decide which is which. I'd much rather see some laws enacted (or re-enacted) requiring equal time for both sides and probably some penalties and fines for lying.

[Careful. If you enforce that fine penalty for lying, the Democrats will go broke.]

It would kill Air America, but you the only right thing to do... would be to re-institute the fairness doctrine. Other than that there isn't anything which wouldn't impact their right to free speech. And even with the fairness doctrine, they would still be able to say those things, but they would be challenged.

[No need to kill Air America since it is already in the process of committing suicide.]

Yeah. Abolish The Constitution, Acquire A Taste For Hypocrisy And Develop A Fondness With '1984'. Or, we can instead respect the right to free speech even when faced with something we don't like.

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

I never cease to be amazed at the so-called progressives who want freedom of speech only as long as it's speech they approve of.

[And this soon-to-be-tombstoned DUmmie WINS a Kewpie doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity!]

At no point did I say they SHOULD be banned. I merely questioned the limits of free speech. For example, posting an idea such as "assassinating a public official" is a crime. Would you consider this a limitation on free speech?

[Several DUmmies have already been investigated by the Secret Service for posting that idea.]

The crux of what I was getting at was that these individuals have exceeded rational discourse and have, in many cases suggested that people such as you and I are less than "patriotic" and therefore not fit to voice our opinions without being labeled "traitors." And the right to free speech has swung enough morons to go on supporting the lies of a war that has caused countless lives, both American and Iraqi.

[The crux of what you were getting at is that you wanted to ban free speech on ideas you don't like.]

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