Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Wisconsin Dems JINXED by Eddie Mush Pitt

Hey DUmmies! You want to know the REAL reason why the Democrats failed in their attempt to overturn the Republican majority in the Wisconsin state senate yesterday? I give you the answer in three words: William Rivers Pitt.

How can that be? Simple. William Rivers Pitt has become the Eddie Mush of the Left. And who is Eddie Mush? He is the REAL LIFE character in the movie "A Bronx Tale" who jinxes everything he comes into contact with. The reason why I describe Eddie Mush as a "real life" character is that when they tried to find an actor to portray the real Eddie Mush of Chazz Palminteri's Bronx childhood, producer Robert DeNiro decided to use the real guy. And his jinx really worked since on the first day of filming it rained.

And the Left's Eddie Mush has been jinxing them for years. I first noticed it following the 2004 election when Eddie Mush Pitt kept dropping "insider" tips that papers were being filed in various obscure Ohio courthouses which could well lead to the overturning of the election results. President Kerry can attest to the effectiveness of Pitt's tips.

And then there was the time when Pitt was a bigwig in Progressive Democrats of America and was placed in charge of seeing that a liberal of their choosing got nominated to a congressional seat in Illinois. Comes election day and the CURSE of the Pitt jinx caused that candidate to lose. But the tarnish of Eddie Mush Pitt didn't end there. He loudly screeched for the Illinois Democrat party to PAY for a recount. Jinx Pitt caused such an embarrassing commotion that he was unceremoniously tossed OUT of PDA.

Remember that massive anti-war rally in DC that Pitt attempted to organize in September 2005? Eddie Mush Pitt ardently hoped the publicity would launch him into the limelight. So what happened? On the very day of the rally, Hurricane Rita hit Texas resulting in ZERO media coverage of Pitt's non-event.

"Bank it!" Those were the infamous Pitt words to reassure his fellow DUmmies that the word "on the street" in Boston was that the Democrat nominee would win the special election to fill Ted Kennedy's ample seat. Oops! Eddie Mush Pitt jinxed the Democrats again!

Last year, we had his prognostication that the Democrats would retain the House. Oops! Another JINX strike.

Worried about Obama's negotiating abilities, DUmmies? No problem. Did it make you feel good to hear Pitt describe Obama as a "pan-dimensional" chess genius whose clever moves were much too subtle for ordinary mortals to comprehend?

Of course, we all remember the most spectacular JINX of them all. The solemn vow by Pitt that Karl Rove had ALREADY been indicted on May 12, 2006. We are still waiting for the completion of 24 business hours for that prediction to be fulfilled.

So by now you think the DUmmies would scream at Pitt to STFU and stop with his hilariously WRONG prognostications and analysis. However, it would be impossible to keep Pitt from uttering his voluminous blather which continues to CURSE them.

Your humble correspondent admits that he was a bit worried about what the results would be in the Wisconsin recall elections. However, when he saw Pitt's THREAD, "ON, WISCONSIN!!" he suddenly felt at ease, secure in the knowledge that Eddie Mush Pitt would JINX the Democrats in Wisonsin. And that is exactly what happened. So let us now watch the latest results of Eddie Mush Pitt's Wisconsin jinx in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting that Scott Ritter's co-author has been sentenced to spending a life term pacing the pavement in front of Bukowski's, in in the [brackets]:



I could much and surely use some good news today.

[The only way to make that happen is to keep your jinxed mouth SHUT which for you is an impossibility.]

Go go go.

[The Eddie Mush cheer.]

On, Wisconsin!

Please, God.

[And God responded by permitting the Eddie Mush Pitt Effect to take place once again. And now to the poor DUmmies still unaware that they have been CURSED by the Pitt Jinx...]

Can I join you WIll Pitt

[No problem. Eddie Mush Pitt jinxes everyone he comes in contact with.]

Everyone's invited. Attendance is mandatory but not required.

[Pitt promises his acolytes front row jinx seats.]

Yes! ON, WISCONSIN! Please, God...Please!

[Next time try begging, "Please, Pitt...Please SHUT UP!"]

I have had my hopes dashed so many time recently that I am afraid to hope. My fingers will stay crossed until the end though..

[Your fate, and the Wisconsin Democrats, are now in the hands of Eddie Mush Pitt. Hee! Hee!]

We could all use some good news. And that would be very good news if they can put a damper on that sociopath, Walker.

[Too late. You didn't put a damper on Eddie Mush Pitt.]

I love this..... and do NOT ever piss off a Badger.

[Nor a Li'l Beaver.]

I can't wait to see these returns rolling in tonight!

[And a few hours later this same DUmmie wished he never saw them. And we now conclude with a special treat. Yet ANOTHER jinx upon the Left by Eddie Mush Pitt as reflected in the following sentiment posted by the Pittster in this THREAD:]

And I'm willing to bet a very old bottle of scotch that it's not over yet.

Gov. Walker, you're next.

[And I'm willing to bet that due to the Eddie Mush Pitt Effect that Gov. Walker will win his next election by a landslide thanx to the jinx curse placed upon the one doomed to tread forever in the Political Purgatory of boomerang predictions.]


Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

Now all we need is for The Sick Perverted Clone of William Rivers Pitt to show up and begin power-slamming his head up his to prove his status as Pitt's Perverted Clone.

10:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Can we get Pitt to opine on the Democratic recall elections next week???

Please.... Please....

10:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

To pray to God when you don't believe in Him is kind of worthless. Especially if support abortion.

11:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Where's troggy when youneed him?


3:20 AM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

Hey Skul - He's over on another thread proving he's every bit the reprobate I've been saying he is:

"I've concluded you're intellectually and morally incapable...." - Jerome Goolsby accurately analyzing the shallow and pathetically weak abilities of Troglaman The Guttersnipe

"Oh...and the "morally incapable" thing? Go fuck your mother." - Troglaman The Guttersnipe proving that analysis was correct

1:42 PM  
Anonymous Elrond Hubbard said...

It's been an interesting year here in Wisconsin and, once again, we proved the bumbling Pittster wrong. We could use a month or two of peace and quiet although I'd love to see the Brewers get into the playoffs.

5:40 PM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

I don't think you'll get your peace and quiet Elrond....the DSA has already targeted Scott Walker for termination with extreme prejudice. I hear the goal is to have him gone by New Year's Day.

10:12 PM  

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