Thursday, October 27, 2011

"Occupy Yourself Movement on Oct 28th 2011"



THE DAY WHEN EVERYTHING FINALLY CHANGED! The DUmmies have had a number of these over the years. Somehow, though, whatever that day is, it comes and goes, and everything seems not to have changed all that much.

This time, however--THIS TIME--it will be different! This truly will be THE Day! Tomorrow, in fact! We will bring those corporate muthaf***as TO THEIR KNEES! They will BEG us for mercy! And will we give them any? NOOO! We will BURY you, you capitalist corporatist pigs!!

How, you ask? Simple. By not doing anything. But, you say, most DUmmies ALREADY do nothing. And you would be correct. However, this time, this Friday, we will do a LOT of nothing, more nothing than ever before. And that will show them, those dirty rotten corporations!

It's a movement! And if it's a movement, you KNOW it's important! As we see here in this THREAD, "Occupy Yourself Movement on Oct 28th 2011."

So let us now occupy ourselves with the DUmmies, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, wondering if Wee Willie Pitt will be occupying himself by visiting his pal Scott "the Inspector" Ritter in prison, is in the [brackets]:

#Occupy Yourself Movement on Oct 28th 2011

[Why, that's tomorrow! Pray, tell us more . . .]

The Occupy movements around the country and the world are garnering overwhelming support from the general populace.

[99% of 1% of the general populace support it! W00t!]

While not everyone has the means to physically participate . . .

[Translation: While most of you progs are too lazy to get off your butts and get out there and stand with the protesters . . .]

there is much we can do on a collective level to help bring our point home to global corporate interests.

[And that "point" is. . . ? I'm not sure you have a point, actually, other than you don't like that some people make more money than you do and you don't like to pay for things.]

In this spirit, many of us seek non-violent ways of demonstrating our repulsion at the vast control these corporations have garnered while infringing on our civil rights as they wage their global destruction on all that is true and fair.

[ALL THAT IS TRUE AND FAIR! They're waging DESTRUCTION on it! GLOBAL destruction! Oh God! Oh Gaia! I WEEP as they DESTROY all that is true and fair! Somebody stop them!! . . . Wait! WE are the ones we have been waiting for! WE can stop them! Yes! For All That Is True and Fair!!!]

It is one thing to stand in a man’s front yard to demonstrate your dislike for his conduct . . .

[Or, like when you're smashed from drinking too much, you know, and you just gotta take a pee somewhere, so you go, like, stand in some random guy's front yard . . .]

but another thing altogether to refuse to participate in the system from which he gains his resources for power.

[DO NOTHING TO POWER!]

In this light, we have choosen a date for the following activities (or non-activity, as it were):

[DUNAC! DUNAC!]

1) A 24 hour television blackout where all participants willfully keep their tubes turned off.

[Tie your tubes! Just say no to those MSNBC corporate stooges like Sergeant Schultz, Lawrence of Insania, and Rachel Mancow!]

2) A 24 hour retail boycott . . .

[24 non-business hours.]

where all participants agree to refrain from buying any merchandise . . .

[Not One D*mn DUmmie Day!]

. . . not directly associated with basic needs, such as food and medicine.

[Doritos and pot are OK.]

3) A 24 hour employment walkout where participants refuse to attend work . . .

[No problem! Most DUmmies refuse to attend work anyways!]

4) It has been suggested and bears repeating, all bank accounts that are not absolutely necessary should be closed.

[Unbank it!]

A momentum is occurring
People are uniting across the world
They are sending a message
The next step is fast approaching


[An excuse is occurring
People like me are too lazy to go to the protests
I am needing a day off
The next step is to stop doing stuff]

On Oct 28th 2011 WE SHUT THE SYSTEM DOWN.

[SHUT IT DOWN! DOWN WITH THE SYSTEM! DOWN WITH DOING STUFF!]

We step out of the system and step back into ourselves.

[Is that you, Rod Serling?]

Turn off all lights

[Even my black light and my lava lamp?]

Unplug all electrical devices

[DUmmies Unplugged.]

Abstain from using TV, radio and internet or phone.

[Shut DUmmieland down!]

Abstain from making any purchase of any kind

[And no donations to $kimmer!]

Choose that morning to cancel any services you feel you no longer need

[Like showers.]

That morning call in sick to work

[Work?]

Do NOTHING that generates money into THE SYSTEM.

[Do NOTHING! In other words, keep doing what you're doing!]

We will send a message
We will unite


[We will stay on mattress
We will sleep]

Read a book

[How about that one by William Rivers Pitt and Scott Ritter?]

Meditate

[Medicate]

Play

[But only with yourself. Play with yourself.]

Sing

[Great idea! Let's get a head start on that, shall we?]

THAT'S A DUMMIE
Tune: "That's Amore"

When the Moonbats go wild
With the sh*t that they've piled,
That's a DUmmie.
When they've plain lost their heads
Like they've gone off their meds,
That's a DUmmie.

Hopes will fly,
Soaring to the sky, rising way up high
Like a giant sequoia.
Hands will wring--
What a ding-a-ling, what a ding-a-ling--
And you'll think, "Paranoia."

When the "F" words flow free
Just like on MTV,
That's a DUmmie.
When they march in the street
Without leaving their seat,
You're in luck:

Those aren't Rovian plants,
They're just Ants in their rants,
And they're FUnnie!
For a laugh and a half
Reading each paragraph--
That's a DUmmie!

[Now back to the list of things to do on Friday instead of doing things . . .]

Dance
Create


[Maybe form a drum circle with yourself. Become a DRUmmie.]

Frolic in nature
Love


[benburch loves to frolic au naturel.]

On Oct 28th 2011
Step out of the system and get back to yourself
Spread the word!
SHUT IT ALL DOWN!


[SHUT IT DOWN! SHUT IT DOWN! SHUT. . . .]

[OK, so it seems that many of DUmmies {cough *Pitt*} have not been able, for some reason or other, to get out there and stand shoulder-to-shoulder with their sisters and brothers in the trenches, in the front lines. But surely THIS, this they CAN do, and with ease! And it will bring the corporations TO THEIR KNEES! So simple. It requires, literally, doing nothing. So simple, yet so devastating to those greedy b*st*rds! So I'm sure ALL the not-at-Wall-Street DUmmies, every man jack of them, will at least be willing to occupy THEMSELVES! And it's only for one day! Let's see now the rush to participate . . .]

But it's my birthday!!!

[Such commitment to the Cause!!!]

ME TOO!

[Can I see your birth certificate?]

It's my m-i-l's 85th birthday that day

[Say, you know, I think I have a cousin in Toledo celebrating his fifth month of sobriety that day. So I'd say that's a legitimate excuse for my not participating.]

I am going to bet right now that this will fall flat on its face.

[Well, sure. The old lady's going to be 85, for goodness' sakes! How many of her friends can be left? And what are you going to do for party games? Spin the pill bottle? Wheelchair races? Of course it's going to fall flat!]

People have jobs and no time. They aren't going to give the boss an excuse to fire them.

[No! Tell your capitalist boss to take that job and shove it! That'll bring him to his knees!]

They need to shop when they have a minute, and baby's diapers, Grampa's heart medicine, and those darn groceries are not going to magically appear if there's something you need to go buy on one lousy day.

[OK, so you stock up a little extra the day before or the day after. But on the 28th, when we DON'T shop, THAT will make the difference! It will break the backs of those evil corporations! Think of benburch going without his favorite diaper for a day! Diaper corporations will literally be soiling themselves as they tremble in fear!]

If there are any sports events on TV (e.g. the Canadiens are playing the Bruins that night), fuggedaboutit. People like their sports, they don't want to do yoga all the live-long day.

[Not me, brother! I PROMISE, if the Cardinals lose Game 6 tonight, I will NOT watch Game 7 tomorrow!]

The Bill Maher fans won't want to miss REAL TIME.

[All five of them.]

a meaningless display of faux righteousness that in the end means nothing. Are you seriously telling me that buying Granny's medications on the 29th instead of the 28th will make a real difference? . . . It's a stupid idea, to put it bluntly. It won't make a difference, because everyone will lie and say they did it, but in reality they'll just go about their business as they always do.

[DUmmie MADem, for that Brief Moment of Mental Clarity®, we will send you a Kewpie Doll! Just not tomorrow.]

Bank Run and General Strike, thanks, but no thanks. Like that's gonna happen.

[Another doubter! What is WRONG with you people!]

Occupy yourself? Doesn't that make you blind?

[There are none so blind as those who will not occupy themselves.]

I will participate in another national strike. Fully aware that's just me.

[But "me" is none other than . . . NADIN BRZEZINSKI!! Yes, Know-it-all Nadin is getting behind this movement! This will be the tipping point!]

The day after my birthday.

[Does this mean--does this mean Nadin's birthday is . . . October 27th? Like, TODAY?? HAPPY BIRTHDAY, NADS! A glass of triage milk with you!]

Ride a bike. It's good for you. It denies the oil companies of income. It does not emit exhaust into our precious air.

[And it does not pollute our precious bodily fluids.]

I'll participate. Be ready for a much more publicized, comprehensive, and widespread similar event date to be announced.

[The Day When Everything Finally Changed, v. 47.2. We'll keep doing this till we get it right.]

31 Comments:

Anonymous Anon 1:50 said...

Ohhhhh!

Thanks for this one, P.J., I needed a laugh!

It's just so funny that these marginal ninnyhammers imagine that they are a 'force to be reckoned with'.

There aren't enough of these clowns to fill a decent clown car, and their imaginary legions are strictly the lip-service and bull$hit types.

"Occupy Yourself Movement"...

BWAAAAAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH!!!

Ohhhh. That is funny!

1:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If I were an employer, and they pulled that crap with me, they'd be looking for a new job, pronto. I don't like to shop, but I may go shopping tomorrow anyway, just to piss off the OWSers.

2:48 PM  
Anonymous envisio said...

I can see this guy writting this thing, daydreaming, pretending to be on stage at the National Mall while thousands of hippies cheer and clap when he loudly proclaims "On Oct 28th 2011 WE SHUT THE SYSTEM DOWN." (yeah f**yeah cheer cheer)

Then he snaps out of it when his mom hollers at him to shut that computer off and go to bed.

2:53 PM  
Anonymous Elrond Hubbard said...

"On Oct 28th 2011 WE SHUT THE SYSTEM DOWN."

Sorry Dummie, where have you been?Obama has already done that. It's called Obamanomics.

3:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Do nothing or a day?? I thought they were going to come back in even larger numbers after residents and police finally got tired of the stench and started cracking hippie skulls? And yes, lazy hippies who contribute absolutely zero to the GDP believing by continuing what they have been doing already will somehow make a difference is good for a laugh or two, even this crosses the line into stupid. Or at least gets them deeper into stupid. Or maybe this means they will take the day off from protesting and holding their hands out for donations? Either way, they never contributed a dime to the economy. The only thing they are contributing is free campaign ads for the RNC in 2012.

3:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Do nothing or a day?? I thought they were going to come back in even larger numbers after residents and police finally got tired of the stench and started cracking hippie skulls? And yes, lazy hippies who contribute absolutely zero to the GDP believing by continuing what they have been doing already will somehow make a difference is good for a laugh or two, even this crosses the line into stupid. Or at least gets them deeper into stupid. Or maybe this means they will take the day off from protesting and holding their hands out for donations? Either way, they never contributed a dime to the economy. The only thing they are contributing is free campaign ads for the RNC in 2012.

3:09 PM  
Anonymous Skully said...

So let me get this straight. These libtards that already contribute nothing to society, are going to shut down the "system" tomorrow by continuing to contribute nothing to society?? The only difference is this time they're telling us they're going to continue to contribute nothing, and that will shut the system down; because all of us who didn't know they exist will now know they don't exist??

#OCCUPY Oblivion.

8:23 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"So let me get this straight. These libtards that already contribute nothing to society, are going to shut down the "system" tomorrow by continuing to contribute nothing to society?" skully

Contribute nothing to society? How many times to we have to go through this? Blue states are bailing you fuckers out. You have more teen pregnancies, more murders, more car wrecks, more incest, more divorces and on and on. You're a pain in the ass. If you became your own confederacy or all move to Somalia, the rest of us would be a whole lot better off.

Do it. Please.

1:22 AM  
Anonymous The ULTIMATE Man said...

Just gotta keep proving you're as fucking stupid as a doorknob don't you Troglafuck?

FOAD Troglafuck, you racist fucking jackass...

1:27 AM  
Anonymous Skully said...

"Blue states are bailing you fuckers out."-Libtard

Sorry Dude nowhere even close to right; but keep believing in Skittle shitting unicorns and all that stuff you Moonbats beeeeelieve!!

The welfare kingdoms of NY,CA,ILL, and the high taxed New England "Commie Corridor" are the drag on this country. It's the red states that are subsidizing these Socialist cesspools.

At least the Somalians work harder than Liberals.

#Occupy a Methane Environment

1:54 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

You're wrong, skully. All you have to do is find out which states TAKE more from the feds than they GIVE...then add it up. Simple.

Not that I think you couldn't do the math or anything...

We're all fucking doomed.

3:38 AM  
Anonymous ENVISIO said...

Well... its Oct.28th. Ansd I'm PISSED!!!

I woke up a little later today and took my time getting ready for work thinking the roads would be EMPTY because some teenager on DU had a proclaimed the day 'Do Nothing Day'.
Dammit... I was late for work because it was the same old packed freeways traffic jams. Wha happen??
Come to think of it..... maybe all the loser libtards did stay home and do nothing because it was just like every other day.
Way to STICK IT TO THE MAN, HIPPIES!!!!

8:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Trogla-turd - You didn't read the study those numbers came from, did ya? For example, #1 on the list is Blue State New Mexico. Why is that? If you'd read the study rather than just parrot what you heard someone else say, you'd know there is a large amount of federally funded scientific research that goes on at installations in NM. Ever heard of White Sands Missile Base? Or Los Alamos Laboratory? I can almost picture the lightbulb appearing over your head now. Funny thing about military bases and nuclear labratories...they are real expensive to fund and all federally controlled. Therefore...drumroll please...lots of federal tax dollars flow into those states. Every state in the very red Southeast has multiple federal military bases. On the other hand, you have pork barrel spending on pet projects by powerful senators...the legend of all time...Robert Byrd of WV. You can call WV a red state all day long, doesn't change the fact that pretty much everything in WV is named after Byrd since he brought half the federal budget to his state. And he is a DEMOCRAT. And a Klansman. But that is redundant.

Not that I didn't think you couldn't read or anything...

We're all fucking doomed.

PS. Nor does it change the fact that the OWS Anarchist/professional protesters/communists/drains on society still do not contribute a dime to this economy. I'm sure they pretty much prop up the "medical" marijuana economy, and from listening to their speeches, also contribute heavily to the LSD industry, but beyond that they are worthless. 99%...of the problem. Now go sober up, get off mom's couch, and formulate what we are all sure is to be a genius retort.

10:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So..it's nearly 4 pm in the central time zone...has our economy shut down yet?

3:49 PM  
Anonymous Elrond Hubbard said...

"Occupy yorself." I got a better idea: "Go f*** yourself."

Let's see, today I took the car for an oil change, got a haircut, picked up some groceries, then the wife and I went to Stir Crazy for lunch. I did not close my checking account nor did I liquidate my savings and investments. If I wasn't retired I would have gone to work and flipped off any OWSers I encountered (bit of a disappointment there). Sorry Dummies.

Aside to Troglaman, your Red State Blue Sate dichotomy is specious.

3:57 PM  
Anonymous Elrond Hubbard said...

"Occupy yorself." I got a better idea: "Go f*** yourself."

Let's see, today I took the car for an oil change, got a haircut, picked up some groceries, then the wife and I went to Stir Crazy for lunch. I did not close my checking account nor did I liquidate my savings and investments. If I wasn't retired I would have gone to work and flipped off any OWSers I encountered (bit of a disappointment there). Sorry Dummies.

Aside to Troglaman, your Red State Blue Sate dichotomy is specious.

3:57 PM  
Anonymous Elrond Hubbard said...

Double post: a mistake but twice the fun.

3:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"formulate what we are all sure is to be a genius retort."-anonymous 10:03am

I see what you did there.

4:05 PM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

"We're all fucking doomed" - Troglaman, The Official Certified Troll of the DUmmie FUnnies Blog Site

Not if we throw the people you support out of power next year on Election Day, Guttersnipe.

Just keep power-slamming your head up your ass and show us all how scared of reality you are, Guttersnipe. When you can no longer avoid reality, you're gonna bawl like the scared man-child you are because you won't be able to pay the penalty for you and your ilk's numerous indescretions over the last six years.

11:25 PM  
Blogger TANSTAAFL said...

"Ride a bike. It's good for you. It denies the oil companies of income. It does not emit exhaust into our precious air."

I'll leave it as an exercise for the class to figure out how FUCKIN' stupid that sentence is.

Really, it's almost as stoooopid as troglemoron.

7:10 AM  
Anonymous krazy kat said...

Well, it's October 29th and it appears Occupy Yourself was a titanic flop.

Pretty much what I expected from DUmmieland, home of Sparkle Ponies and bong dreams.

9:02 PM  
Anonymous Corona said...

Oh, down twinkles!

10:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Probably a slight uptick in business, Krazy Kat, after all the number of shoplifters and complainers in the stores would've been a little lower than normal.

DAT

3:52 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

Hey! Good News.

Cain settled a sexual harrassment complaint (5 figures per complaint) during the 90's and Ricky showed up in New Hampshire pretty shloshed and gave a speech.

Looks like you're stuck with the Later Day Saints guy. Joseph Smith, multiple wives (not that there's anything wrong with that), and special holy undergarments.

If you think the libs had anything to do with Cain's outing or Perry's performance, your wrong. We'd have liked either one of these guys more than Romney. Why?

Holy undergarments vs. Dirty Hippie skid marks and secretions.

That's why.

12:40 AM  
Anonymous Namalgort said...

Bill Clinton paid Paula Jones 850,000 to settle his Sexual Harassment suit, and he got re-elected. And he wagged his Willie at her. Cain told some girl she was the same height as his wife, and she claimed that was harassment. The payment was a severance settlement paid by Cain's employer/association. Not quite the same, but Cain's a Black Conservative, so to a libtard it is.

Notice how whenever a non-liberal Black man makes a play for power, he gets accused of this. Clarence Thomas had to go through the same shit.

The Dem's just hate when an uppity nigra goes off their plantation.

1:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Trog, you're getting on this meme a little late. Is it because women's height comparisons are just now offensive to you?

9:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Throg said;

"Hey! Good News.

Cain settled a sexual harrassment complaint"

Just like every other Demoquack..Change the subject, bury your head in the sand and pretend it didn't happen!

Occupy yourself, For the Good of All!!!!

11:08 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"The Dem's just hate when an uppity nigra goes off their plantation." He Who Shall Not Be Named

Nice try. Everyone knows that if you say your name backwards, you're instantly and brutally possessed by something horrifyingly evil.

Who the hell is this guy, Satan? Every frickin thing he said is going to be talking point tomorrow. It's like HE KNOWS THE GODDAMN FUTURE.

Let me tell you something, you collection of tropical fruits...the libs did not do this to Cain. Why? Because Cain/Obama would have been GOOD for Obama. If you're deluded into thinking something else...thank your new buddy, Satan.

12:46 AM  
Anonymous The ULTIMATE Man said...

Yeah, like we should pay fucking attention to you, Troglafuck...since fucking when are you a political genius?

FOAD, Troglafuck, you racist jackass.

12:59 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Yeah, like we should pay fucking attention to you" The Ultimate Man

But you ARE paying attention to me, obviously.

I love you too, more than you could possibly know.

3:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Why? Because Cain/Obama would have been GOOD for Obama."

I know. I feels good to think happy thoughts. Even when that's all they are.

7:33 AM  

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