"How do you feel about maintaining a friendship with a Republican?"

I'm an easy-going guy. I can be friends with most anyone. Like Will Rogers, I never met a man I didn't like. Well, I guess that's true, since I have never actually MET Bill Maher, Michael Moore, or Keith Olbermann--and even with Olbermann, if we can stick to baseball, maybe we could talk.

But the feeling is not necessarily mutual with the DUmmies. Many of them simply HATE OUR GUTS! Witness this THREAD: "How do you feel about maintaining a friendship with a Republican?" DUmmies, don't hate me because I'm a Rethuglican! C'mon, sing with me: "Why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends. . .?" So let's all hold hands and FEEL THE LOVE, in Kumbaya Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, who would be happy to hoist a few pints with the Pittster at Bukowski's (as long as he doesn't talk my ear off), is in the [brackets]:

How do you feel about maintaining a friendship with a Republican?

[That's "ReTHUGlican," mister! Say, are you some kind of LOUSY FREEPER TROLL??]

A Republican in another city contacted me after the election, said he'd voted for Obama, and wanted to renew the friendship. . . . But sorry to say, the vote seemed to be based more on "inspiration" than on values. . . .

["Inspiration" is not good enough! This piece of human debris is not WORTHY of your friendship! Stay true to your values!]

I don't judge my friends on party affiliation.

[WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU??? . . . (BTW, to be fair, there were a number of DUmmies on this thread who likewise said they don't let politics get in the way of friendships. But their posts are not as FUnnie!)]

I don't care.... as long as her implants stay in place.

[Bosom buddies forever.]

Hell yeah! Dude, wait'll you see my bewbies. . . .

[No thanks, ben.]

Avoid 100%. They are not deserving of the air they breath.

[Feel the love.]

I do not forget the horsesh*t I heard come out of people's mouths, or who they were.

[A donkey never forgets.]

All those Jesus-freeks can kiss my @ss. . . .

[Calm down, ben.]

As long as they're housebroken and behave themselves. . . .

[Call the Repug Whisperer.]

I refused to see my bil last summer. . . . We avoided him and the sil.

[bil? sil? Nil!]

But the sil voted for Obama (praise goddess).

[Thrill!]

I can bash him over the head if he starts anything. . . .

[Kill bil.]

I would say give them a chance. . . .

[Give piece of sh*t a chance.]

We have to be careful about becoming them. . . .

[THEM!]

Let them come to you with questions and then educate them slowly. . . .

[Don't use big words.]

"Conservatives" are unfortunately Born that way.. it isn't a Choice, they lack 'Fluidity' in their thinking because of Organic physical deficiencies in essential cognitive structures of the brain.

[We're CUCKOO IN THE NOGGIN!! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

they need to be put in walled Reservations and prevented from breeding. . . .

[Spay or neuter your Repugs.]

we are all Doomed if they are left to continue to F*CK everything up. . . .

[DOOMED, I tell you!!]

liberals were 4.9 times as likely as conservatives to show activity in the brain circuits that deal with conflicts. . . .

["Should I call Domino's or Pizza Hut tonight? Domino's or Pizza Hut? But then there's Papa John's! Oh, I just can't CHOOSE!"]

I cut loose my last Republicker friend right after Katrina.

[Gone with the wind!]

I've told them all to go f*ck them selves.

[I thought we don't WANT them to breed!]

I tend to keep friends in "boxes". . . .

[Is that you again, ben?]

Half the world I don't want to associate with.

[The other half doesn't want to associate with YOU.]

They are people who believe in and support f*cked up shit and vote for f*cked up people who f*ck up everybody's life.

[I find this post somewhat ironic. Maybe it's just me, but I do.]

people who think poor black people caused the housing bubble, that Saddam was a threat to the USA, that the war in Iraq was justified, that Ray Nagin is to blame for Katrina, that pharmacists shouldn't have to fill prescriptions for contraceptives, that the free market solves all problems, that global warming is a liberal hoax, that single payer healthcare is socialism and anything that might be considered socialist is inherently evil or inferior.

[Let's take those point by point: It was Barney Frank and Chris Dodd; Saddam was a threat, even the Clinton admin thought so; hideable, movable sarin gas and al-Qaeda in Iraq; it was Krazy Karl's Weather Machine; abortifacients are not "contraceptives"; socialism creates even more problems; check the temperatures this winter; look how well government-run healthcare is working in Britain and Canada; and yes, socialism is inherently evil and inferior.]

people who are racist . . .

[Like Jeremiah Wright.]

I'm maintaining a happy marriage with a Republican, so nothing is impossible.

[Ol' Serpenthead checks in.]

I told her there are plenty of "pro-life" Democrats out there. . . .

[In Congress? They must caucus in a phone booth. And there are no phone booths anymore, either.]

Who isn't pro life?

[Most Democrats.]

Democrats aren't pro abortion, they are pro choice. Who can't understand that?

[The babies who are killed?]

I am probably more lefty than 95% of the population. . . .

[You're being modest. Try 99%.]

Maybe the Obama years will bring some healing.

[He IS a Lightworker, you know.]

i married a republican

[Sounds like the sequel to "I Married an Axe Murderer."]

I had a Republican friend... He has since turned into a Democrat.

[It's kind of like a sex change.]

I think of them as traitors, having been responsible for contributing, however minutely, by their votes, to the massive decline of the US in most almost all respects. No prison is bad enough for the outgoing administration heavies. There MUST be trials!

[DEATH to the Bush voters!]

Until they get the help they need and convert to liberalism, I have no use for them.

[But this is National Take a Rethuglican to Lunch Week!]

she had reservations that Obama is too liberal. Obama is NOT liberal enough for me. . . .

[KARL MARX would not be liberal enough for you!]

hey when its your own mom you have to talk to her. . . .

[Especially when you want her to answer the door when the pizza delivery guy comes!]

What I've found is that most Republicans are like us in many respects. . . .

[Except for the Wiccan, lesbian, purple-hair part.]

Now I live in Nebraska. . . . These f*ckers are nuts. I can't go to the gym because they have FOX tv. on and even though I try not to look up at the screen it makes me sick! I've seen bumper stickers that say "Still voting Democrat, you're stuck on stupid". I wanted to ram the f*cking car!

[OK, now WHO'S nuts??]