Thursday, June 09, 2005

DUmmie FUnnies 06-08-05 ("I'm a DUmmy, and PROUD of it!!!!!")

Self-recognition is the first step in the cure for utter idiocy. Therefore some DUmmies are displaying some hope in this THREAD titled, “I'm a DUmmy, and PROUD of it!!!!!” Yes, once in a while my DUmmie Ants realize they are being watched as this thread reveals. Please remember, DUmmies, that your whole existence is STRICTLY for my entertainment. Of course, that won’t stop me from profiting from the laughs you provide in the future if I can ever get Mary Matalin to make that lunch date with me to discuss a DUmmie FUnnies book (with CD-ROM insert for related comix stories) deal. So now let us look in at our DUmmies inside their Ant Farm looking back at us in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, grateful that the DUmmies are proud to be DUmmies, is in the [brackets]:

I'm a DUmmy, and PROUD of it!!!!!

[Isn’t that also Howard Dean’s motto?]

I see the latest nickname the unimaginative morans have tried to label us with is DUmmy, or DUmmie. I'll be their DUmmie, or as Val Kilmer's Doc Holliday said,"I'll be your huckleberry".

[Since you aren’t Doc Holliday you can be my dingleberry, DUmmie.]

Who cares what those brainwashed freaks think. I'd rather be a DUmmie than a FReeper

[Congratulations on having a permanent DUmmie status!]

what I don't the UTTER OBSESSION "they" have with DU. I mean, they follow us like a soap opera, fer cryin' out loud.

[More like a comedy routine. However you do provide some good soap opera with your Drama Queen antics.]

They are starving for ideas. Maybe even they are burning out on repeating the rovian talking points. Oh the name really hurts freeps!

[Every morning a Fedex envelop arrives for me filled with Rovian talking points for me to repeat.]

It's what happens when you remove masturbation as an option their members are too tiny to even pee with so they have to obsess about something else

[Speaking of obsessions: Jeff Gannon, Downing Street Memo, IHOP, MIHOP, PNAC, BFEE, etc..]

I can bet the response to this, no joke. Watch them say: "because you are a soap opera". Or something equally unoriginal.

[More like a COMEDY since you always keep us laughing.]

I understand their obsession. They are soulless, unethical, and un-American, so their obsession is par for the course.

[I’m so soulless and unethical that I ADMIT getting my laughs from pathetic DUmmies.]

Stem Cells = important
Starving Children = nope

[DUmmies = dopes.]

I'm a liberal DUmmy and proud of it.

[Liberal DUmmie is a redundancy.]

There is a poster over there who I am certain is lying about his kid being hurt in Iraq. I think we should start a site investigating this internet fraud being perpetrated on good trusting conservatives who fall for any patriotic story no matter how big a lie it is.

[Uh-Oh! Methinks you have just incurred the wrath of speed_addiction. Stand by for the FIREWORKS!]

At least as ethical as them challenging Andy. Sorry..if Andy is a liar then so is that person..and they certainly have appeared on all the Andy threads..they deserve our investigation

[Funnie how the words “pancreatic cancer” have become TABOO in DUmmieland. Want a quick way to be tombstoned? Then just ask Skinner about Scamdy’s medical status---specifically if he REALLY had pancreatic cancer.]

That parent supports the war...when they challenge Andy's credibility, they put their own at stake

[When you hold up Scamdy as your Poster Boy for Credibility then you know why we call you DUmmies.]

Dummy or Dummie?

[“DUmmie” is the preferred spelling. Thanx for asking.]

now that I have your attention. F*CK YOU, ASSHOLES

[Getting under your skin, eh DUmmie CatWoman?]

Well, I like DUmmie. Usually I pay no attention to threads concering these "people", but, I like the ie ending.

[I test marketed it and when the DUmmie FUnnies book is published it has been shown that “DUmmie” works out better in the title than “DUmmy.”]

I am a Crash Test DUmmie. I hurl myself at obstacles of moran nature.

[You DUmmies are crash testing yourselves all the time. However, my favorite Crash Test was on election day when you DUmmies were GLOATING over Kerry’s victory based on the exit polls. Then a few hours later you DUmmies crashed against the harsh reality of the ACTUAL election results. Another Hilarious episode in the endless DUmmie Crash Tests.[

I am not a DUmmie.

[It’s not a matter of choice, DUmmie LittleClarkie.]

They actually talk about particular posters here as though they know them. I kid you not, like some obsessive psychotic un-fan club: stalkers in other words.

[The critters in my DUmmie Ant Farm often perform in certain predictable patterns that makes them very recognizable. For example that Drama Queen soapbox you frequently emote upon, DUmmie lala_rawraw. However, I’m afraid that DUmmie mopaul has you beat for flat out looniness. When I see one of his posts, it is a guarantee of laughable bile spilling over.]


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