DUmmie FUnnies 06-01-05 (Scamdy Post-Hospital Thread On DUmmieland DELETED By Skinner!!!)

It’s Pied Piper Pitt’s WORST nightmare. Scamdy has left Johns Hopkins Hospital (according to Scamdy) and is now posting in DUmmieland as you can see (UPDATE: Thread ELIMINATED by Skinner) in this THREAD titled, “Anyone want to guess who the former Mrs. Harasaki is?” Actually, Scamdy, the only thing I really want to guess is why the April 27 FAX posted by your cheerleader Pitt as “proof” that you have pancreatic cancer was able to accurately predict back then that you would have surgery on the week of May 23 when it was ORIGINALLY scheduled for May 10. Perhaps Mrs. Harasaki is the one who sent the FAX and possesses some sort of psychic powers to look into the future since it wasn’t until almost two weeks AFTER the FAX was sent that your surgery was rescheduled to the week of May 23. However, welcome back Scamdy. Your recovery has been truly miraculous. In fact you were even able to make cell phone calls and sing Broadway show tunes from your ICU and even make a few posts on the Web even though Pitt has recently threatened to “smash you” if you make more posts in DUmmieland. UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE! Apparently Skinner is also quite FRIGHTENED by Scamdy’s appearance in Dummieland since he just tossed this whole thread down the Memory Pitt. Unfortunately for Skinner most of that thread has been PRESERVED here on the DUmmie FUnnies. As usual the jolly healthy Andy Stephenson posts are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering how many more of Scamdy’s posts will be tossed down the DUmmieland Memory Pitt, is in the [brackets]:

Anyone want to guess who the former Mrs. Harasaki is?

[The person who sent that Faux Fax that you suckered Pied Piper Pitt into posting on the Web as "proof” that you had pancreatic cancer?]

Guess why this is important and you win a big door prize. First right guess gets a cupie doll.

[That’s KEWPIE Doll and I award those to DUmmies who have a very brief moment of mental clarity. Such an award will be given to the first DUmmie to wonder how someone who supposedly had pancreatic cancer surgery has managed to remain as incredibly active as you have been, Scamdy.]

Andy ... how ARE you doing? Shouldn't you be resting?

[Resting? Hell no! Scamdy is feeling so chipper on the heels of his pancreatic cancer surgery that he is happily belting out Broadway show tunes on his cell phone from his ICU.]

Yeah Andy. How are you feeling these days?

[MUCH BETTER than Pied Piper Pitt. That’s for sure! Pitt has been spending all his time recently on his knees staring mesmerized at Scamdy’s zipper while waiting to be fed the latest bogus document that pops out of Scamdy’s toaster.]

Not feeling so great...the incision will hurt for at least 4 weeks...then I get to have chemo and radiation. Fuuuun!

[The Fuuuun begins when you hit up DUmmieland again for money to pay for the chemo and radiation therapy.]

Who ta hell is Harasaki? Isn't it past your bedtime?

[Why should Scamdy hit the sack when he is so full of energy and other things?]

I am in too much pain to sleep. got out of the hospital today and the bed I am in is...well not as comfortable as the Hopkins bed was.

[Scamdy is not comfortable in his hotel bed. Please send money now for Scamdy to stay in a 5-Star hotel room.]

Got drugs?

[Better hope that Pied Piper Pitt doesn’t have drugs or we might have an OD case.]

yes but not as good as those delivered intravenously.

[Especially those drugs delivered via an intravenous rectal intrusion, Scamdy.]

Happy to see you in back in the game mode Andy!

[Just like he was back in ICU.]

I bet it was the surgeon, yes! and she was married to some other doctor but fell in love with Andy and got divorced and now she's the current Mrs. Andy Stephenson! And now that he's coming off the morphine he's thinking maybe he made a mistake.

[Yes, definitely a mistake. If Scamdy found himself married to Petra Verkaik he would also find himself in a state of deep revulsion. Now…if that fantasy included marriage to Pied Piper Pitt, that would be so much more romantic to Scamdy.]

God I hope not the former Mrs H is well lets just say not the marryin type. Her chidren have been known to desecrate church sancturaries.

[Which is worse: desecrating church sanctuaries or scamming people on the Web?]