Wednesday, September 24, 2014

"If you were president how would you respond to the threat from ISIS?"

I'm baaaaaack! As I told you on Monday I now have a lot more time on my hands because the couponing has gotten so lousy. So in addition to posting a lot more DUFUs in the future I also have time to work as a writer for a new comedy show, THE FLIPSIDE, which appears on over 200 stations and online. Here is a CLIP from the most recent show.

Okay, back to the DUmmies...they have now put on their version of a war face in this THREAD, "If you were president how would you respond to the threat from ISIS?" As you can see, the DUmmies putting on their pretend CIC caps yields some amusing results. The average DUmmie would respond to the threat to ISIS by making corporations illegal. So let us now watch the DUmmies enter the War Room in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if this DUmmie thread will yield up some Flipside comedy material, is in the [brackets]:

If you were president how would you respond to the threat from ISIS?

[Time to play DCC, Dummie Commander-In-Chief.]

Ignore it ... while reserving the right to be outraged when something bad happens.

[Like if an Evil Republican is spotted and in that case send in the Tomahawks.]

Supply non-military aid to all of the surrounding countries to allow them to focus their own resources on ISIS. Build hospitals, schools, roads, utilities.

[Don't forget about sending in MRIs. Oh, wait! Obama already did that to help Ukraine meet the Russian threat.]

Pull 100% of our troops, ships, and planes out of Iraq, Iran, and the mid-east.... cut the military budget in half - spend the money on developing new energy in the US. At that point, Isis wouldn't care about us.

[Spend the money on solar powered windmills and let ISIS laugh themselves to death.]

Good intell and police work to keep them from entering the US or attacking us here.

[Yeah, no way they could enter the USA by crossing the Rio Grande. That border is locked down tight.]

US bombs are not the answer.

[How about pillow cushions?]

Ever heard of convictions for money laundering and illicit trade?

[Bomb them with indictments!!!]

ISIL emerged when we left Iraq. Our getting involved happened in 2003. Our getting uninvolved happened in 2011.


They are no threat to the US

[Unlike the true threat...those EVIL Republicans.]

Basically, improve construction here, and utilize existing talent within the US to improve health, security and infrastructure to reduce threat, while benefiting society as a whole.

[It was the construction of the Golden Gate bridge that defeated the Japanese.]

I would focus on world hunger, mosquito nets for malaria infested countries, increasing world literacy rates, and things like that. I would try to be force for what I consider to be good, which would save significantly more lives than dealing with ISIS.

[Posted a DUmmie waving a butterfly net.]

I would have.. Arrested the Bush administration and handed them over to them in return for the hostages.

[The Bush administration will be indicted in just 24 business hours.]


Anonymous krazy kat said...

Like everyone else, the DUmmies have no credible ideas but they do suspect that ISIS is actually a false flag operation financed by George Bush and the RNC.

4:50 PM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

I wonder if the Troglaman Clones on DU are just trying to be funny or if they really are that stupid/insane because some of those responses are beyond crazy.

1:48 AM  
Blogger 98ZJUSMC said...

Both. But, mostly insane.

7:01 AM  
Anonymous KayInMaine said...

DU KKKorporate Meeting!!!!!!

4:41 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Kay, long time no rant.....exit question, Now that B Hussein has bombed 7 islamic countries, why does he hate brown people so much?

4:19 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

Well, you bunch of pea pods, answer your own question. What should we be doing about ISIS?

Slipping into my trogla-Kreskin mode for a moment...not one of you will answer that question. Now watch me bend this spoon.

11:31 PM  
Anonymous The JUDGE said...

Blasting them off the face of the planet works for starters, Troglatwit, you idiot.

7:35 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Blasting them off the face of the planet" Judge

Sounds good!! How would you go about doing that? Putting 500,000 troops on the ground? Nuking them? Genocide?

We can't blast them off the face of the earth, you stupid shit.

10:35 PM  
Anonymous The JUDGE said...

"We can't blast them off the face of the earth, you stupid shit." - Troglatwit the Stupid Fucking Idiot

Which shows you're just another politically correct moronic idiot, Troglatwit. We absolutely can blast them off the face of the earth you stupid inbred fool and if it takes nukes to do it fine. Personally it makes more sense to use napalm and MOABs which you'd know if you weren't such a stupid idiot. And this time if we send in troops it ought to be 500,000 or so and let them just have at it and wage war for a change.

By the way you stupid fucking idiot, your hero Obama is the one who's fucked this up six ways from Sunday, but I bet you still pray to him don't you, you idiot?

12:46 AM  
Anonymous The Soul of Troglaman said...

You fucking morons couldn't think your way out of a fucking paper bag. You're all fucked because you don't worship Obama like I do. That's why I'm a fucking genius and you assholes are fucking screwed losers. We were going to arm ISIS until you fuckers screamed about it. Now you want them dead? Fuck you, each and every fucking one of you. We should arm ISIS to the teeth and just bail on that whole region. My god, Obama, is going to build thousands of windmills and put up millions of solar panels which he'll pay for by taxing you rich greedy fucks into the poor house so we won't need any oil from anyone even ourselves. Then he'll take all the money the rich oil fucks have fucked everyone out of to deal with the future of our country - the undocumented aliens who will make us a utopia.

So fuck the lot of you. Obama's large and in charge you stupid racist fucks.

12:58 AM  
Anonymous Jihad is beautiful said...

Hey troglaman, what would you do to stop ISIS? How would you undo Obama's fuck ups? I think you're clueless

P.S. Did someone chop off your head? You sound dumber than usual.

1:47 PM  
Anonymous Corona said...

Just infect every Middle Eastern goat and camel with ebola and the male Middle Eastern population will die from ebola. Easy peasy.

7:32 PM  
Anonymous The ULTIMATE Man said...

What "Duckys here" is actually doing is a headstand in a waist deep pile of horse manure.

9:57 AM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

Remember the Iraq thing, you stupid shits? How well did that work out? You're idiotic 'blast the shit out of them' strategy hasn't worked since Viet Nam. And yet, despite that, you incredibly moronic pumpkins just keep advocating the same crap over and over again. What's scary is that you jackalopes can't see it.

2:06 AM  
Anonymous The ULTIMATE Man said...

That's because it hasn't been seriously tried since Vietnam you fucking idiot.

FOAD Troglafuck.

5:29 PM  

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