Thursday, June 29, 2006

Jim Webb---Born Angry

The Jim Webb campaign for the Senate from Virginia has just released one of the most amazing political STATEMENTS, from a psychological point of view in recent memory. It is notable for its childish surliness and downright anger. Normally, official political statements take a high tone but this one looks as if it had been authored by an extremely ANGRY DUmmie from the Democratic Underground or an unhinged member of the Kos KOmmie community. In fact, it wouldn't surprise me a bit if there a Kos authorship given the fact that Webb himself has been BLOGGING on the Kos site. In addition, the Kos folks have been instrumental in his supporting Webb's angry pugnacious in-your-face campaign as you can see in this Daily Kos THREAD titled, "Webb won't be swiftboated." So let us first watch the Webb campaign EXPLODE with chip-on-the-shoulder anger in Bolshevik Red before moving on to his supportive KOssacks while the commentary of your humble correspondent, sending a chill pill to Mr. Webb, is in the [brackets]:

June 27, 2006

Webb Campaign Blasts Allen Campaign for “Weak-Kneed Attacks” Against Men and Women in Uniform

[Webb Campaign Blasts Allen Campaign for "Weak-Kneed Attacks" that Never Happened.]

Arlington—The campaign of U.S. Senate candidate Jim Webb today called the attacks on Webb’s patriotism by Allen’s campaign, “weak-kneed attacks by cowards” and demanded that Allen and his campaign apologize.

[We DEMAND that Allen apologize for an attack that he never made!]

“George Felix Allen Jr. and his bush-league lapdog, Dick Wadhams, have not earned the right to challenge Jim Webb’s position on free speech and flag burning. Jim Webb served and fought for our flag and what it stands for, while George Felix Allen Jr. chose to cut and run. When he and his disrespectful campaign puppets attack Jim Webb they are attacking every man and woman who served. Their comments are nothing more than weak-kneed attacks by cowards. George Felix Allen Jr. needs to apologize to Jim Webb and to all men and women who have served our nation,” Webb spokesman Steve Jarding said.

["George FELIX Allen, Jr. and his bush-league lapdog, Dick Wadhams, have not earned the right to lick Jim Webb's boots. George FELIX Allen, Jr. is a cut and run coward while Webb is a hero, I tell you, a HERO dammit!!! Any criticism of Jim Webb will be purposely misinterpreted by us into an attack on every man and woman who served and on mom's apple pie. George FELIX Allen Jr. needs to grovel before that font of perfection, Jim Webb, and apologize for even existing."]

On Tuesday, George Felix Allen Jr. and his campaign issued a press release in which the Allen campaign, through Wadhams, implied that Webb’s position in support of the Free Speech Amendment to the U.S. Constitution amounted to a political act and not a defense of our Constitution, which Webb fought for and for which he was highly decorated. George Felix Allen Jr. did not serve.

[On Tuesday, George FELIX Allen Jr and his campaign issued a press release in which the Allen campaign, through Wadhams, implied by the angle of their eyebrows but didn't actually say, that Webb wants to destroy the Constitution. The lousy NERVE. Did we say that Webb is a HERO and that George FELIX Allen Jr. is a coward?]

“I believe it is precisely because of bush-league attacks like this that John Zogby, a highly respected, independent polling expert just this week said that Dick Wadhams is not fit to serve as a campaign manager and that George Allen should find a new manager,” Jarding said.

[We DEMAND that Dick Wadhams immediately leave the George FELIX Allen, Jr campaign because polling expert John Zogby said so. We also reserve the right to DEMAND that other members of the George FELIX Allen Jr campaign be fired whenever we want.]

“While Jim Webb and others of George Felix Allen Jr.’s generation were fighting for our freedoms and for our symbols of freedom in Vietnam, George Felix Allen Jr. was playing cowboy at a dude ranch in Nevada. People who live in glass dude ranches should not question the patriotism of real soldiers who fought and bled for this country on a real battlefield,” Jarding said.

[Jim Webb is an AUTHENTIC hero while George FELIX Allen Jr was just some wannabee cowboy at a dude ranch. Nah! Nah! Nah! George FELIX Allen Jr lives in a glass dude ranch. Nah! Nah! Nah! Neener! Neener! And if George FELIX Allen Jr ever dares question Jim Webb on anything he is gonna get a big fat NOOGIE from Jim Webb the HERO! Nah! Nah! Nah!]

“Is Dick Wadhams willing to publicly say that Colin Powell, John Glenn and Bob Kerrey are unpatriotic for having the same position on the flag burning amendment that Jim Webb has? Ask him,” Jarding said.

[Is Dick Wadhams willing to prostrate himself in penitence for working for the George FELIX Allen Jr campaign? Ask him. DAMMIT, ASK HIM!!!]

Jarding continued, “The following is why George Felix Allen Jr. has not earned the right to challenge Jim Webb in his support of our Constitution and its free speech provisions:

["The followingg is why George FELIX Allen Jr. needs to just shut his big fat mouth:"]

Jim Webb was first in this class of 243 at the Marine Corps Officer’s Basic School in Quantico, Virginia.

[Jim Webb wasn't given a silly middle name like "FELIX."]

Jim Webb served with the Fifth Marine Regiment in Vietnam, where as a rifle platoon and company commander in the infamous An Hoa Basin west of Danang.

[Jim Webb NEVER served at some Nevada dude ranch.]

Jim Webb was awarded the Navy Cross, the Silver Star Medal, two Bronze Star Medals and two Purple Hearts while fighting in Vietnam.

[Jim Webb got lots of medals so George FELIX Allen Jr needs to just give up campaigning NOW!]

Jim Webb served as a platoon commander and as an instructor in tactics and weapons at Marine Corps Officer Candidates School.

[Jim Webb served as a platoon commander so he has earned the right for George FELIX Allen Jr to vacate his Senate office NOW!]

Jim Webb served in the US Congress as counsel to the House Committee on Veterans Affairs from 1977 to 1981, becoming the first Vietnam veteran to serve as a full committee counsel in the Congress.

[Jim Webb was Born Angry so George FELIX Allen Jr better watch out. Nah! Nah! Nah!]

In 1982, Jim Webb first proposed, then led the fight for including an African American soldier in the memorial statue that now graces the Vietnam Veterans memorial on the National Mall.

[In 1982, Jim Webb led the fight to keep anyone like Nevada Dude Rancher George FELIX Allen Jr from ever serving on Capitol Hill.]

In 1984, Jim Webb was appointed the inaugural Assistant Secretary of Defense for Reserve Affairs, where he traveled extensively in, and worked closely with, our NATO allies. As Assistant Secretary, Webb directed considerable research and analysis of the U.S. military’s mobilization capabilities.

[In 1984, Jim Webb became even more ANGRY than ever at Nevada Dude Rancher George FELIX Allen Jr for even existing.]

In 1987, Jim Webb was appointed Secretary of the Navy becoming the first Naval Academy graduate in history to serve in the military and be appointed Secretary of the Navy. In addition to his wartime medals, Jim Webb has been awarded the following medals and citations:

[In 1987, Jim Webb entered the Pantheon of the Gods on Mt. Olympus. In addition to becoming a major deity, Jim Webb has been awarded the following medals and citations which cover his enormous chest:]

The Department of Defense distinguished Public Service Medal

The Medal of Honor Society’s Patriot Award

The American Legion National Commander’s Public Service Award

The VFW’s Media Service Award The Marine Corps League’s Military Order of the Iron Mike Award

The John Russell Leadership Award

The Robert L. Denig Distinguished Service Award.

[The I'm Not Nevada Dude Rancher Robert FELIX Allen Jr In-Your-Face Born Angry Award with Special Chip On The Shoulder Designation.... Okay, now that Mr. Webb's campaign has presented the psychological profile of screaming juvenile anger let us now turn to the comments of the far left Kossacks, hailing their new hero in this THREAD]

Webb was awarded the Navy Cross, the Silver Star Medal, two Bronze Star Medals and two Purple Hearts while fighting in Vietnam. While Allen was playing cowboy at a dude ranch in Nevada.

[You mean George FELIX Allen Jr. Remember, you must ALWAYS include that all important "FELIX" in the name.]

I love it! Webb took a Republican Talking Point and burned their little keisters with it. Now that's a Fighting Dem, and that's what we need to see more of!

[I love it! Webb proved he is as LOONY as we are!]

Excuse me, but Felix is not the most popular name. The using of his middle name makes him sound weak. This disassociates the son from the Dad. Being the son of a great Washington Redskins coach is the only reason George Felix Allen got elected. We need to constantly refer to the little brat as GFA so as to try to break that linkage.

[A KOs KOmmie engaging in some "sophisticated" campaign strategy. Yeah, that constant use of the name "FELIX" is sure to win the campaign for you folks...NOT!]

That's how you do it -- you take the f*cking fight to them, and call them on their own bullshit in their own terms!

[This is how you do it -- you throw a childish tantrum in public and then call them lots of names.]

I could NOT believe how effective this will be if he continues to use "Felix" in this manner. It makes Allen look geeky, snooty, and out of touch.

[A senate campaign built upon the constant repetition of the name "FELIX." KOs KOmmie strategy at its most sophisticated.]

Didn't you ever wonder why we know the middle names of so many criminals?

[Was "The" the middle name of Felix The Cat?]

And that's why Webb's guys phrased it like this. It makes the guy seem like a criminal (I'm sure he is) or a wuss. That's a no-lose proposition.

[More like a lose-lose proposition.]

Yet Webb has not expressed a credible alternative to the Democrats or the Republicans. Far worse, he has expressed no plan at all.

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL! Hey, Webb doesn't need to deal with any boring issues. All he needs to do is keep repeating "FELIX" over and over and over again and call Allen a Nevada Dude Rancher.]

Webb must know Allen got teased as a little kid by being called Felix.

[NAH! NAH! NAH! NAH! NAH! NAH! And I bet Allen got lots of noogies in the locker room.]

Do they think Felix is a candyass name or something? I hope not, because that would be juvenile and stupid.

[Shhh! Please don't stop Webb from wrecking his own campaign with his childishness.]

I assume the Webb campaign's repeated use of "George Felix Allen Jr." is an attempt to emphasize the fact that Sen. Allen is NOT his father, a very popular football coach and thus by extension a "manly man."

[I assume the Webb campaign is completely juvenile if they think this will win it for them.]

My impression is that the "Born Fighting" stuff, though it seems like powerful machismo, is actually Webb's Achilles heel. He has to watch out and not get tripped up by his pugnacity and stubbornness.

[And juvenile attitude. We must not forget that.]

"George FELIX Allen, JR." Haha! That was awesome! Everytime Allen is mentioned, we should call him by his full name, cause it sounds so....wimpy.

[Awesome, man! And that Nevada Dude Rancher bit is sure to sweep Born Angry Webb into the Senate.]

I may have missed it but could someone tell me or provide a link with what exactly Allen said to begin with?

[Unimportant. All that counts is that Webb got a chance to let go of his Inner Anger and call George FELIX Allen Jr lots of nasty names. Nah! Nah! Nah!]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

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Anonymous DumbAss Tanker said...

As I recall, Webb's pugnacity (or, more accurately, mulishness) made it kind of unlikely that anyone would want to see a second Academy grad become Secretary. He fell somewhat short of setting the world on fire in the job.

9:55 AM  
Blogger ntk said...

Being the son of a great Washington Redskins coach is the only reason George Felix Allen got elected.

I see. I suppose then that it had nothing to do with Allen's being a popular former Governor.

Fact of the Day(tm) from the droolers at the DUmbderground.

11:06 AM  
Blogger Capitalist Infidel said...

What would democrats do if they couldn't be victims? All they do is whine and cry like little 4 year old girls.

2:34 PM  
Blogger Majestic 12 said...

Hahah priceless :) Whine, whine whine, all the democRATS can do. Just found this place. Keep up the good work, PJ :)

DUMB, the acronym for Democratic Underground Message Board

8:42 PM  
Blogger Majestic 12 said...

By the away, your helicopter kite is awesome :)

4:33 AM  
Blogger PJ-Comix said...

I'm glad you like the helicopter kite. I didn't mention it in the ad but the helicopter kite is a VERY EASY way to meet chicks at the beach. Just hover a helicopter kite right near a chick and most of the time they come to you and ask questions about the kite. Hey, it's a better way of meeting chicks than by asking them what their astrological sign is.

5:48 AM  
Blogger Majestic 12 said...

Cool, that's a good idea :)

11:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I dont blame the man for saying something back to the Allen campaign...THEY started it. His campaign manager stuck his foot in his mouth

10:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If Webb had come out saying what he did without provocation then I would have to say that his comments were totally uncalled for...but if Allen and his people stick their feet in their mouths then people shouldn't be surprised when they choke on them

10:06 PM  
Anonymous DumbAss Tanker said...

Is it just me, or is he striving successfully for a "Mr. Potatohead" look in that picture?

12:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why is Webb pink?

Is this a political statement?

Or has he just been out in the sun too long?

1:29 PM  

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