Wednesday, April 12, 2006

DUmmie FUnnies 04-12-06 ("Help!!!! I'm having an existential crisis!")

If ever there were a DUmmie thread with a quintessential title, it is this THREAD titled, "Help!!!! I'm having an existential crisis!" If I had a contest for the PERFECT DUmmie thread title, I bet no submission could come close to beating this one. Yes, DUmmies are in a perpetual state of having an Existential Crises. It has been unrelenting for the past 5 years that DUmmieland has been online. And for this, I THANK them since they have supplied a WEALTH of comedic material for the DUmmie FUnnies. So let us now read of yet another DUmmie experiencing an Existential Crises in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, observing the standup act from his Existential Outpost in Cyberspace, is in the [brackets]:

Help!!!! I'm having an existential crisis!

[Stop the world! I wanna get off!!!]

Does anything matter?

[Spoken like a true existentialist.]

How many of you, like me, read about this bio-labs lie, or read about the leak being traced to the White House, or the phone-jamming being traced to the White House, or the Katrina tape, or Cheney shooting his friend in the face -- I could go on forever, like reading "My Pet Goat" and doing nothing, or reading the PDB and doing nothing, or even the Guckert scandal -- and your next thought is, okay, so he'll be resigning soon, or they'll be getting fired soon -- after all, Bill Clinton got impeached over a blow job -- and then the next big event is... NOTHING HAPPENS?

[Don't forget Fitzmas Fitzling and the Day When Everything Finally Changed.]

Is it gradual desensitization? If this were the first day after the stolen 2000 election, would folks be marching in the streets over the loss of our democracy? How many of us will want to move to Mexico soon, to live in a country that still has some semblance of democracy, and the ability to actually elect one's president?

[Yeah. Move to Mexico and try to explain existentialism to the cop who throws you in jail for failing to pay La Mordida. You will enjoy the "semblance of democracy" in a Mexican prison. Oh, and the Mexican prison toilets there are ever so clean. And now let us hear from your fellow DUmmie existentialists.]

It baffles me... What the hell happened to Americans?
They used to have an edge. Now they are hardly more than blind consumer zombies who care only about how much shit they can stuff into their boxes. My parents and grandparents fought on the streets for labor rights. Now, people are complacent... I think that this country has been destroyed by the move to a credit based system informed only by marketing. Everything is driven by corporate bottom lines, and that translates into widespread brainwashing by a market sponsored media.

[DUmmies wish Americans would have THEIR edge and march on Washington by the millions to overthrow the EVIL Bush Regime. The fact that it isn't happening is taken by them that the NORMAL PEOPLE are "hardly more than blind consumer zombies.]

EXACTLY -- brainwashing by a market sponsored media.
That's why we have a bunch of zombies running around thinking they just want to be entertained.

[Speaking of which: THANX DUmmies for the great comedic entertainment you have provided over the years.]

Brainwashed into complacency, into pleasure-driven, pain-avoidance,...behavior. *shakes head*

[I'm shaking my head at all the pleasure-driven, pain-avoidance meds that you DUmmies have admitted to taking. Those are some of my FAVORITE threads. The Meds Threads.]

We won't move to Mexico or Canada...we will fight for America........we will fight for Democracy...and the removal of the Treasonous Bastards...

[You won't be fighting your way past the pizza box. Anything that requires REAL action quickly FIZZLES in DUmmieland. DUAC! DUAC!]

i'm thinking about moving...just trying to figure out where.

[May I recommend a Jersey Shore landfill?]

Hannah Arendt called it "The Banality of Evil"

[PJ-Comix calls it "The Bathos of DUmmies."]

Television, I think, has played a major role in lulling Americans into a stupor. I think I heard the other day that the average kid watches 3 hours of TV a day, and spends far less time than that studying. We seem, as a people, to be more interested in who is going to win American Idol and what' going on with the kids on "Real World" than we do with doing something to help our country.

[This from the DUmmies who fawn over "West Wing" and the fictitious liberal president.]

I hear ya... I am mentally exhausted. Some days, I feel like a total nihilist.

[On even numbered days you are an existentialist. On odd numbered days you are a total nihilist.]

I think people KNOW that protests don't seem to work. But they don't know what else to do. It's paralysis more than anything, for lack of a solution.

[Pied Piper Pitt organized (without the help of A.N.S.W.E.R. he keeps insisting) a protest in Washington in September and no one even noticed.]

some days it is just beyond bearable. I have days where I read one story after another of the things these liars and thieves and killers are doing to this country and to the world, and I just can't take it all in. I want to cry or scream or something.... and I write letters and sign petitions and go to demonstrations and talk with all my friends about this outrage or that outrage. And yet, it continues and continues and another day comes where I read again about more things that are taken away, one more person who is stopped by Homeland Security, one more person who is delayed at the airports, one more person who is filing suit through ACLU for torture and abduction, hundreds more people dead in Iraq and Afghanistan and the Middle East, one more threat of war and destruction, one more distortion from this administration told as if it were truth. How much more can we take before it all comes tumbling down? I truly believe we are watching the downfall of this country, much like the downfall of other empires and countries that were once so powerful. The biggest difference is that we have so much more military might and a ruling elite that won't give up anything, that think this military might can control the world. In fact, it can't really control it, but it can destroy it. Will they take that final step and nuke Iran? Don't know, afraid to believe it, but afraid to ignore the possibility. My friends sometimes tell me to take the weekend off and stop reading all the news. But even so, it's still there when I come back. And inside I feel compelled to do something, one more letter, one more demo, even if I find it hard to believe it will make a difference. Doing nothing, however, I know won't make a difference and makes me feel worse. So just like the rest of us, I struggle on trying to believe that we will come out of this on the other side before I die. After all, we have lived through the depression, WWII and Hitler, the bombing of Japan, McCarthy, this is just another sad time for the world. I try not to give up hope.

[Let's all have an existential moment of silence in memory of the repressed terrorists.]

Same as you ...doing nothing makes me feel worse. So I plod along doing what I can. Your friends' advice is good --to take breaks, which I do. But some of us just can't stop keeping the vigil when we know someone (or a country) we care about is in serious trouble. It is profoundly depressing to live in a state of vigil for an extended period of time. It's only natural to want to feel GOOD about your country. Most people want to feel connected to a community that "works," that makes sense, that doesn't perpetrate evil and reward corruption. I still have hope at this point, because so many Americans seem to be waking up and realizing the seriousness of the situation. Finally. And because of their misdeeds too numerous to list, the Bushies are sputtering, flailing and floundering. People are seeing for themselves that the Emperor is naked. Most of the country is hoping and praying for big changes. I don't feel so alone anymore. You don't truly appreciate what you've got til it's gone. And a lot of things we took for granted are gone. Maybe we had to learn this the hard way...before we can create the America we really want to live do that we need to hold both parties feet to the fire. There will be opportunity in the downfall of the B* regime.

[I love the smell of DUmmie futility in the morning!]


Anonymous DumbAss Tanker said...

Ummm, just a thought, DUmmies, but maybe the masses aren't marching in the street because they have it resonably OK now, if not downright sweet, unlike the times in which your grandparents lived.

3:51 AM  

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