Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Pied Piper Pitt Returns...sort of

(Less than two weeks to go until a BIG webcast. Be there. Aloha!)

William Rivers Pitt has RETURNED to DUmmieland! At least he has come back second hand, not in person. What happened is that DUmmie sfexpat2000 posted an overlong Pitt TruthOut RANT which she mercifully edited down in this DUmmie THREAD titled, "Will Pitt: Burning the Law in a Riot of Treason." In his article, Pied Piper Pitt predictably slams Alberto Gonzales for his supposed failings. Of course, Pitt has never directly addressed his SUPREME failing of perpetuating a gigantic journalistic hoax from TruthOut itself, namely the May 12, 2006 indictment of Karl Rove. Yes, Pitt, while you are tossing stones at Gonzales, why don't you tell us how you tried to fake your way to fame by "predicting" the Rove indictment. You thought that indictment was a sure thing so you sought a cheap way to make yourself a celeb by "predicting" the indictment so you could get credit for it. Of course, your in-depth investigation was backed up by one Jason Leopold, a self-confessed drug addict and degenerate known for engaging in journalistic hoaxes long before the Rove indictment fraud. So now that the 24 business hours has passed and no Rove indictment, you find yourself exiled from any possibility of being the political player you so desperately want to be. NO campaign is going to hire somebody that has a known history of not only fraud but somebody who stabs his own candidate in the back as you did while the press secretary for Dennis Kucinich and got caught secretly feeding campaign documents to the Kerry people in order to ingratiate yourself with a candidate you figured would be the nominee in 2004. So let us now watch Pied Piper Pitt get up on his moral high horse to condemn Gonzales in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting that even the Gravel campaign shuns Pitt, is in the [brackets]:

Burning the Law in a Riot of Treason

[Burning Ethics in a Riot of Self-promotion.]

The departure of Alberto Gonzales from the Attorney General's Office brings America to a place of definitions, and hanging in the balance is the very idea of the nation itself. The basic concepts and fundamental principles of our republic now stand as the only legitimate considerations going forward, for they have been tested almost to annihilation already, and will not endure much longer if we continue on this path.

[Glad to see you haven't lost your touch for bloated pomposity, Pitt.]

It is the mythology within the Declaration of Independence we speak of, the fiction that tells us we are endowed with rights, and that those rights are unalienable. This falsehood has been vividly exposed in the last several years, and it has been a harsh lesson indeed. All the rights we hold dear and believe to be our greatest strength are, in fact, only words on old paper with neither force nor power. The next line - "That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed" - is the muscle behind the myth, the core that has endured a withering assault.

[Withering assault like what happened in a certain Newton schoolyard?]

Matters are so much worse than our national political dialogue lets on. The resignation of Gonzales has unleashed a torrent of hard words and harsh criticisms aimed at the deplorable nature of his tenure, but the truth of it continues to elude mention. They call Gonzales an incompetent, a crony, a loyalist, a disgrace, leaving off the one word necessary to fully explain who he is, and what he was engaged in before he stepped down.

[Did they also call Gonzales a self-serving journalistic fraud?]

Alberto Gonzales is a traitor. That is the only word to explain it.

[William Rivers Pitt is a fraud. That is the only word to explain it. And now on to the DUmmie response to Pitt's non-return to DUmmieland.]

He sure is a traitor. Will nails it.

[Will nailed it in Newton.]

he he...I knew Will would have to write on Gonzo's departure... I think this is his first Truthout piece in a month or more.... Kudos, William...

[Will has been in self-exile from DUmmieland, TruthOut, and possibly the law.]

Come Back Will. Please. I have been away for a few days, so if Will Pitt has already come back, then I'm sorry for posting this. But if Will has not come back, then PLEASE come back to DU soon, Will. Seeing your lovely words is wonderful. But many of us enjoy dialoguing with you -- and seeing others dialogue with you. We love you, Wiil. Please -- PLEASE -- come back.

[Come here, little Newtonian. Will Pitt would enjoy "dialoguing" with you.]

It should be sent to every member of Congress.

[And every member of the Newton schoolboard.]

God, I miss Will Pitt! COME HOME!!!!! Geez Will, c'mon! Come out of lurkdom, come on back home! You're one of the reasons I came here in the first place!

[You want to see Will that much then check the Bukowski's barroom floor.]

Mr. Pitt.....He's just too good....K&R, Gotta love him.....the gift of the pen is rare.

[That rare combination of self-important pomposity, unintentional humor, and ever-present self-promotion to absolutely NO effect. Well, folks, sorry about the unusual brevity of this DUFU edition but it now appears that Pitt's "return" to DUmmieland has generated little interest, even there.]


Anonymous Anonymous said...


Who is this wanker, anyway?

What's the "Newton schoolyard" biz?

Is this character someone Kos-ish in the libtard dimension?

7:50 AM  
Blogger Son Of The Godfather said...


Wanker = William Rivers Pitt, a legend in his own mind who posts on DU. He is very, very important... at least to us here on DUmmie FUnnies, where his seemingly endless, often alcohol fueled ramblings are shredded for our amusement. Think Susan Estrich, but more feminine.

Newton Schoolyard = The (*ahem* - alledged) Pitt Meat Market, where William (alledgedly) had some... uhm... err... "problems" with underage youth(s) of indeterminate sex.

To some DUmmies, his excessive verbosity has elevated him to cult status. If you can drone on and on (and on) about nothing, and throw in a healthy dose of BDS, you too can be a DUmmie icon!

10:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Will is my muse - EVEN MORE than Olbermann!

12:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you both! I think I get the picture... sort of a verbose Rosie O'Donnell spinoff.

Without all that nasty testosterone.

Poor creature. There are medications that might help.

And plenty of books on "writing for clarity".

12:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I knew he couldn't stay away!

6:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dang-it TP, one of these days we'll figure out who's sock puppet you are.
Jeez, you crack me up.


11:58 PM  
Blogger JorgXMcKie said...

Isn't odd how drunks always seem to think they have unique insights into every topic in the world, but as they ramble on and on and on (and on and on and on) nothing they say makes the least bit of sense to anyone even mildly sober?

Pitt reminds me of the guy who staggers into a neighborhood bar already well into his cups from his previous bar who proceeds to pretty empty the place with his incoherent maunderings. It just amazes me that the DUmmies are so fascinated with him. Maybe they're just all to young to have had the experience of being driven from their favorite bar by a drunken blowhard.

12:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Maybe they're just all to young to have had the experience of being driven from their favorite bar by a drunken blowhard."

They are ALL drunken blowhards. That's why they need the DUmp, no one else will stick around to listen to them.

10:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I do wonder if any of those commenters are over the age of eighteen.
Bloddy damn shame. Pack of damn teenies doing their best to out-do their so-called peers.


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