Monday, May 07, 2007

DUmmies Mourn Victory Of Pro-American Candidate

Two candidates are running for the presidency of their country. One is anti-American and the other is pro-American. So you would definitely root for the victory of the pro-American candidate, right? Well, yes but only if you are a NORMAL American. If you are a DUmmie or similar Leftwing loon then you would mourn the victory of the pro-American candidate as you can see in this THREAD titled, "BREAKING NEWS: Sarkozy has won French presidential elections." It's a sad time for the DUmmies. Not only is the most anti-American nation in Europe now headed by a leader friendly to us but things are looking up in Iraq in terms of high ranking Al Qaeda leaders being eliminated. The general rule is that the sadder the look on Dingy Harry's face, the better things are for America. So let us now watch the DUmmies angrily mourn the rise of pro-Americanism in France in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if we can finally question their patriotism, is in the [brackets]:

BREAKING NEWS: Sarkozy has won French presidential elections. Ahead with 53-55 %

[Dingy Harry wept.]

According to exit polls Nicolas Sarkozy is set to become France's new President.

[And exit polls are NEVER wrong. Remember that DUmmies.]

When does the violence start?

[Posted the HOPEFUL DUmmie in the very first reply.]

Exit polls mean crap.

[Except when they show Jean Kerry winning.]

Wonder If Rove Helped Him Rig The Poles?

[And we have the first Rove election conspiracy post!]

There's another hour before polls close


This is great, just when the UK gets ready for a new PM, the French elect someone who'll probably be more then willing to replace Britsh troops with their own soldiers in Iraq.

[Things are just NOT WORKING out for the DUmmies.]

Sarkozy strikes me as very authoritarian

[Whereas you consider Hugo Chavez to be a mere Bolivaran democrat.]

Jesus, what is wrong with this f*cking planet.

[Perhaps it's time for you to consider moving to an Alternate Universe.]

Sarkozy's vote on electronic voting machine is better than average - anyone surprised?

[Bev Harris is just $10 away from overturning the French election.]

I suspect the Socialist party is going to become even more fractured than it is already. Not a recipe for success.

[Mourned the DUmmie.]

I swear to God this shit is starting to sound like a progressive version of the John Birch Society. As if conservatism were some kind of spooky worldwide conspiracy controlled by Bush, Cheney, and "the Corporations." Such hysterics are just as wrong now as they were when conservatives invoked them to justify McCarthyism for national security reasons and the Vietnam War based on the domino theory.

[The Vast Rightwing Conspiracy is EVERYWHERE!]

I won't shout fraud yet

[Okay, we'll wait a minute until you do.]

I just know that Sarkozy will bring the wrong kind of change.

[Like changing to a pro-American foreign policy.]

The worrying thing is that he might do a Thatcher on the French economy.

[Meaning he will IMPROVE it.]

The elections were rigged

[Copy that for pasting on every post following a conservative election victory.]

Sarkozy looks like another Napolean Bonaparte.

[Please remind him to place his hand on his tummy for his official portrait.]


[Apparently you only talked to French DUmmies.]

My 84 year old father-in-law just talked with me from Touleuse France. He is shitting his pants and you should hear him "merde" this and "merde" that, and "il est un fascist."

[You need to send your father-in-law a box of heavy doody Depends.]

So many have tried to warn people this is a global phenomenon. But it was easier and safer to think it was all those "ignorant, fat Americans". Well, welcome to the New World Order, garçons et filles. Electronic voting is the Global Fascist's best friend. Now you know how it happened here.

[And yet the electronic voting victory of Hugo Chavez was somehow legit.]

Do you have any background in Bush and the neocons? If you did, you'd know rigged elections are entirely part of their arsenal. Don't be naive. The people who arestating this are NOT "tinfoilers". The people who refuse to accept the possibility are ignorant of the people with whom we're dealing.

[Your extra-large tinfoil hat is obviously shading out all rational thought.]

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

The gasping fear of electronic voting is incomprehensible. When boxes of paper ballots can "go missing" and hanging chads and weird 'butterfly ballots' confuse the weak-minded, one would think that a simple point-n-grunt system would be welcome!

After all, if someone is going to cheat... the medium isn't the hindrance.

9:39 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

JP this is one of your best postings. If the DUmbasses would read your postings they woulld see how pwoned they are.


This DUmbass is akin to the infamous quote by another dummie that she knew of no one that voted for Ronald Reagan.

Wonder If Rove Helped Him Rig The Poles?

Now theyre blaming Polish people?

10:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

According to the DUmmies, every election that doesn't go the way they expect is somehow rigged. If i's not butterfly ballots, it's electronic voting machines. It doesn't matter how people vote, any vote against socialism is a fraudulent vote. After all, that's how socialism woks; the only true vote is a vote for the party, right DUmmies?

BTW, how's that Ohio vote investigation going?

2:47 PM  
Blogger Mongrul said...

Excellent PJ, I'm actually speechless at this point...even though I expect this crap out the the DUmmies. Your analysis (HEHE) was spot on. I hope for the bestfor this guy, but it's FRANCE, I mean really...come on...France....OMG.....
I have a hard time believing..... wow... France....conservative... no way....not the French.... (time for another drink...)

8:45 PM  

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