Tuesday, January 09, 2007

"I did an investigation. Now we can impeach."



The Democrats won both houses of Congress in November but the Left is still incredibly frustrated. Why? Because it looks like there WON'T be any impeachment of Bush. For one thing, the clock is working against impeachment since the Bush term has only two years to go. More importantly, the Senate doesn't have near the votes to convict. It takes a two thirds vote and even if Senator Johnson ever regains conciousness and every Democrat votes to convict, they still need 16 Republican votes. Of course the biggest impediment to impeachment is that you have to have an impeachable offense. Perjury is off the table since most of the liberal scholars a few years ago told us that perjury is NOT an impeachable offense. So what are the liberals left with to justify impeachment? Not much. However this has not discouraged the DUmmies. In fact, one intrepid boy DUmmie investigator believes he has found grounds for impeachment as you can see in this THREAD laughingly titled, "I did an investigation. Now we can impeach." So let us now watch this DUmmie investigator, joined by his fellow intrepid DUmmie investigators, dig up grounds for impeachment in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, visualizing DUmmies with magnifying glasses trying to find impeachment clues, is in the [brackets]:




I did an investigation. Now we can impeach.



[Oh goodie! That's all we were waiting for. Some DUmmie to dig up grounds for impeachment.]




According to U.S. District Judge Henry Floyd, Jose Padilla, a U.S. citizen, was illegally detained without charges for three years. A confession has been obtained from the perpetrator. The perpetrator is one George W. Bush.




[That's it? If you try to impeachment Bush on those grounds you ensure that the Republicans retake the House and Senate in '08.]




Have you guys done any investigations? I'm working on another one.




[The DUmmie Hardy Boys jump into action.]




But that's a crime. Impeachment would be too good and take too long.




[Emphasis on "too long."]




Let's get us some Blackwater guys to go and snatch the perp and put him in one of those secret prisons he promised us he closed.




[A Wal-Mart detention center or a Halliburton concentration camp?]




I did another investigation. Now we can impeach.




[Oh goodie! What was the result of your other investigation?]




According to U.S. District Court Judge Anna Diggs Taylor, the National Security Agency illegally monitored Americans in violation of the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act. A confession has been obtained from the perpetrator. The perpetrator is one George W. Bush.




[Oops! Impeach Bush on those grounds and you will also ensure that the Republicans retake the White House by a landslide in '08.]




Have you guys done any investigations? I'm working on another one.




[It's so much FUn to pretend to be a DUmmie Hardy Boy.]




I think I'll do some investigating too.




[I wanna be a DUmmie Hardy Boy too!]




Three words: Downing Street Memo Three more words. Now we can Impeach.



[Three words: LOL!]




I did yet another investigation. Now we can impeach.



[You just can't keep a DUmmie Hardy Boy down.]




According to the Government Accountability Office, Americans have been the victims of an illegal propaganda campaign. A confession has been obtained from the perpetrator. The perpetrator is one George W. Bush.




[Yes, I'm sure the leftwing profs who claimed that perjury was not grounds for impeachment will approve of that one...whatever it means.]




Have you guys done any investigations? I'm working on another one.




[Spaketh the Energizer DUmmie Hardy Boy. It just keeps on ranting and ranting and...]




I did still another investigation. Now we can impeach.




[You just can't stop the Energizer DUmmie Hardy Boy.]




According to George W. Bush, one George W. Bush ordered one Richard Cheney to selectively release highly classified information in the interest of discrediting one Joseph Wilson. Bush's scheme led to the outing of a covert CIA operation. As indicated, a confession has been obtained from the perpetrator. As indicated, the perpetrator is one George W. Bush.




[MERRY FITZMAS!!!]




Have you guys done any other investigations? I'm working on another one.




[Redundancy can be quite catchy as well as contagious.]




we need one done on... 9/11/01! MIHOP!




[The Truther faction weighs in.]




Nifty. We can save Congress a bunch of time by doing these. What about Dick Cheney? Something about outting a covert CIA by the name of Valerie Plame. I knew we could do this without spending billions of dollars.




[Nifty! They don't even have to have Congressional investigations. Just check out the DUmmie board and send Bush straight to The Hague.]




Until all of the hard evidence is investigated and collected? Bush stays unimpeached!! and nothing will change this, no website, no hearsay nothing but sworn statements and hard verified evidence...




[KILLJOY!!!]




Now that the Investigations are complete it is time to Impeach Bush and Cheney.




[The DUmmie investigations are complete. IMPEACH NOW!!!]




More grounds for impeachment. Katrina murders. Signing statements




[Actually, those are grounds for your confinement at the Happy Farms Asylum.]




Nicknameless and I did an investigation. Now we can impeach.




[YIPPPPEEEEEEE!!!!!]




According to a report by the non-partisan Congressional Research Service, one George W. Bush is using signing statements to expand executive power to the detriment of Congress by means which are “generally unsupported by established legal principles.”




[And don't forget the jaywalking and overdue library book charges.]




Remember it takes 67 Senate votes to convict and you aren't going to get that w/Jose Padilla.




[Nor with any of the other "charges" cited here.]





When they took Padilla's rights, they took your rights.




[DAMN! They took away our right to become terrorists.]




Treason or Bribery are the standards..




[But NOT perjury. The leftwing profs asserted that very strongly.]




The entire length of his administration is one long impeachable offense. He only ascended to the position as the result of a coup.. carried out in broad daylight, with the complicity of the Supreme Court....




[And yet the impeachable "offenses" you listed here are the best you could come up with? Thanx for the laughs!]


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5 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Three more words. Now we can Impeach.

Isn't that four words?

9:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Isn't that four words? "

Not in Venusian, where DUmmieBoy comes from.

7:17 PM  
Blogger JorgXMcKie said...

Well, at least I suppose this keeps some of these nutcases away from sharp implements.

11:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Forget the "Hardy Boys" analogy. These guys are more like the "Hardly Boys" from South Park

7:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Three more words. Now we can Impeach."

In the immortal words of Butt- Head, "Uh huh huh huh, dumbass."
In fact, Butt- head would probably be the intellectual superior to a lot of these DUmmies!

9:25 AM  

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