Friday, June 09, 2006

"Dog Feces Left at Congresswoman's Office"

[Update: Michelle Malkin has more information about the Democrat Dog Doo-Doo Dame including the news that she is no MERE volunteer but has an official Democrat Party position as the Colorado Senate District 13 Democratic Central Committee vice chair.]

As soon as I saw this news headline, "Dog Feces Left at Congresswoman's Office", I instantly KNEW the political party of the victim as well as that of the perpetrator. It doesn't take any great genius to figure that out. I love this story on so so many levels. First of all, it shows just how DESPERATE the Democrats are. According to the MSM the Democrats are confident of retaking the House and maybe the Senate this year. If so, then why do we see such desperate acts so early in the year? This was not just some isolated bizzare act. This is merely a PRELUDE of what we will be seeing the nearer we approach election day as the Democrat confidence in victory continues to erode no matter what the Ouija Board polls say. This story is also hilarious because it involved a former college professor committing a juvenile act and then got caught due to an ASTOUNDING level of utter stupidity. And finally, I like this story because the dopey crime was committed on my birthday, May 31, so I consider this another one of my gifts in addition to the fact that Katie Couric also left the Today show on that day. The ONLY way this story could get even BETTER is if we find out that the Democrat Dog Doo-Doo Dame is also a DUmmie. And if she is, it wouldn't surprise me a bit. So let us now watch the DUmmies wallowing in Dog Doo-Doo in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, with a pooper scooper in hand, is in the [brackets]:

Dog Feces Left at Congresswoman's Office

[No need to figure out the political persuasions of the victim and of the perpetrator. The headline says it all.]

Republican U.S. Rep. Marilyn Musgrave's re-election campaign was already heated, and it just got smelly as well: Her staff accused a Democratic activist Thursday of leaving an envelope full of dog feces at Musgrave's Greeley office.

Musgrave spokesman Shaun Kenney said someone stuffed the envelope through the mail slot in the door on May 31 and then sped away in a car. Kenney said most of the preprinted return address was blacked out, but staffers used the nine-digit ZIP code to trace it to Kathleen Ensz, a Weld County Democratic volunteer.

Ensz told The Associated Press she left the envelope at Musgrave's office but said it "wasn't in the office doors, it was in the foyer." Asked what she meant by the act, she declined comment.

Kenney demanded an apology from Musgrave's likely Democratic opponent, state Rep. Angela Paccione of Fort Collins.

[Before we go on to the DUmmie comments on this news story let us subside with the laughter enough to analyze this HILARIOUS story. First of all the CHILDISH crime itself: committed not only by a Democrat volunteer but also a former PROFESSOR at the University of Northern Colorado. So you would figure that a former college professor would have half a brain in her head? WRONG! Instead of shelling out a buck to buy 50 plain white envelopes to pack the dog doo-doo in, this Doo-Doo Democrat saved money by using her OWN stationary and blacking out her address except for the zip code which quickly identified her as the source. DUhhhhhhhmmmmmmie!!! Then when confronted with the evidence, the Dog Doo-Doo Democrat Dame's defense was that she didn't leave it in the office doors but in the foyer. DUhhhhhhmmmmmie!!! This is like a murderer protesting that he did NOT shoot the victim in the heart, only in the lung. Okay, let us now analyze how the DUmmies are taking this story which works on so so many levels as an incredible source of mirth...]

Heh heh heh. Did they stick it with a bushitler flag?

[Heh heh heh. Ask the Democrat Doo-Doo Dame when the judge sentences her to 200 hours of community service hours cleaning up public parks with a pooper scooper.]

She makes us democrats look like. insane idiots. I don't condone this. This is sick. I don't welcome her in my circle.

[Wrong. She makes Democrats look like just what they are---insane idiots. Welcome to the asylum.]

Human feces would be more appropriate...or pig entrails...

[...or DUmmie doo-doo.]

Kathleen Ensz is an idiot. Democrat or Republican, this was a dumb stunt. With friends like her, we don't need enemies. Leaving an address label attached was an act of inspired stupidity.

[That's because she is a DUhhhhhhhmmmmmmie.]

I have an important question? How could they tell the difference between dog crap and the regular bull crap associated with congress?

[I have an important question. How could they tell the difference between dog crap and your brain cells?]

You'd think she would have thought to use an envelope WITHOUT HER 9-digit zip code pre-printed on it?

[That's because this BRILLIANT professor figured she would save the 2 cents per envelope that a pack of 50 plain white envelopes would have cost her at the Dollar Store.]

That was my first and only thought on this subject. And we wonder why we lose elections. Can you say "dumb"?

[Sure. DUmb....mmie!]

Some people are so f*cking stupid...

[Such people are called DUhhhhhhhmmmmmies.]

the final four digits of a 9-digit ZIP can specify a PO box,
drawer, or address. It narrows things down a lot.


I Condone Such an Act. much appreciated... I hope to see more of this.

[A DUmmmmmb act condoned by a DUhhhhhhhmmmmmie.]

Let's hope the dog has been de-wormed

[Or the Democrat Doo-Doo Dame might have worms but wouldn't that be considered karmatic justice?]

she left a return address on the envelope? with volunteers like this, no wonder we lose.

[With volunteers like this, no wonder WE laugh.]

my first thought as well! what a freakin idiot.

[My first thought was what is her DUmmie screen name?]

Karl Rove is planting dog shit in offices these days...
he never runs out of ideas does he?

[The obligatory "Blame Karl Rove" post.]

Preprinted return address? Is she THAT stupid?

[She's a Democrat. She's a left-wing professor. And most likely she is a DUmmie. That should answer your question.]

she left dog crap for smart do you think she is? Sadly, even some Democrats are morans...

[Hilariously, MOST Democrats are "morans."]

If this woman isn't a Rove/Atwater/Ailes/ Segretti, etc, etc type plant then she is a fool, and does not belong in Democratic politics. This is a childish, pointless act that should not be tolerated. Yes, elections are stolen and Repubs use inane rhetoric to win, but that is no excuse for sinking to this level.

[Is her real name Lucy Ramirez?]

Sounds like Karl Rove's stunt in planting a bug in his own office. The very fact that the "volunteer" left a paper trail says to me that she "volunteered" all right. Volunteered to help make the democratic candidate look bad.

[Sure. Karl Rove has nothing better to do these days than hypnotizing leftwing college professors and turning their minds to mush in order to do his bidding.]

What kind of IDIOT would black out her return address instead of using a PLAIN envelope in the first place??

[The kind of IDIOT that signs up to become a DUmmie.]

DUMB IDEA? I don't know about that! It disgusting, but harmless! Not using a plain envelope was very very dumb! But the idea isn't! I have 3 dogs. Hmmmmm........

[Sorry but the idea is also DUhhhhmb. What was the Democrat Doo-Doo Dame trying to doo (pun intended)? Change the election results this year with an envelope stuffed with doggie doo-doo? Actually she might have done that in the form of a backlash AGAINST the Democrats for their terminal stupidity.]

This is Rove bullshit and anyone who believes this is f*cking stupid.

[Karl Rove: Master planner of EVERY little stunt in America, no matter how trivial, including the dog doo-doo trick.]

Do you honestly believe that who ever would do something like that would leave evidence implicating them self? Puh-leeze!

[Since this involved a DUhhhhhhhmmmmmie... Yes.]

Kathleen Ensz is a 63 year old professor emiritus at U of Northern Colorado and a local Democratic party official (vice chair of the Colorado Senate District 13 Democratic Central Committee). She's been involved in local Democratic politics for some time...not a likely Rove "plant." Why can't you accept the fact that sometimes even Democrats can lose their composure and do really foolish, childish things. That's what happened here and if you honestly believe it was part of some conspiracy directed by Karl Rove...well...that's just sad.

[No, no. Don't disabuse them of that notion. The Democrat Dog Doo-Doo Dame was programmed by Rove at the age of 6 to be a Manchurian Candidate "plant." The fact that Karl Rove wasn't even born when she was 6 is totally irrelevant to the issue.]

Democratic activist loses cool. In a remarkably immature and childish stunt,leaves envelope with dog crap at repub candidate's office. Stupidly (although given the state of mind she must've been in to pull such a silly stunt in the first place, not surprisingly), she leaves evidence that leads the police to her. When confronted she admits leaving the envelope. That's it. There isn't and won't be any more story. Musgrave will, as one would expect, attempt to exploit this by tying it to the Democratic candidate. The Democratic candidate will (and, indeed, already has) denied any connection with this dumb fourth grade level act. Unless something were to emerge showing that the candidate knew/approved of this stunt in advance -- and I highly doubt that there is any such evidence since if anyone with half a brain had known about this they would've tried to stop Ensz -- that will be it.

[Sorry but that won't be "it." This Democrat Dog Doo-Doo Dame story is already spreading rapidly throughout the Web due to its HILARIOUS nature. It has ALREADY become folklore.]

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Blogger PJ-Comix said...

Hey, I'm open to suggestions on how to get more folks to the DUFUs.

5:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

well PJ do not post PJ Comics in a post to DUmmies. I did tonight and got booted under one of my many logins. Boy are they in a foul mood over there. I suppose they will be looking for my other posts now so I'll kind of lay low for a little bit. "Wheres the beef" has bit the dust, but try to find the other 6 logins.

2:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is what got me tombstoned from DUmmieland tonight

I know, I know, newbie, low post count troll! I have been here one way or another for years. I have been kicked off a few times, I must have 3 or 4 inactive logins that I don't even remember. But something has changed here.
It used to be that DU was a discussion forum to advance Democratic ideals and goals. Often lively debate, may times silly stuff but usually civil. Maybe it's disrupters, but for the last few months this place seems to have turned into an audition for P.J. Comix "DUmmie FUnnies" Hey look at Me! I made DUFU! WOW!
Or how about a poster saying, "Whoo Hooo"! Limbaugh read my post on the air. I'm famous.
How about 300 posts about Coulter? She's a tranny! Ya, that'll show her. Ann's a queer! Ann's a queer. She has balls and an adams apple. That'll keep Her off the air!
Bush is an idiot. Bush is an evil genius. Which one?
Rove is a genius. Rove is controlling everything. Rove this Rove that. He's one guy!
Hackett is our savior! Hackett is a Hack!

3:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

But seriously, what else would you expect a moonbat Democrat to stuff into an envelope during an election campaign? Hmmmm?

7:40 AM  
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