Wednesday, April 20, 2005

DUmmie FUnnies 04-20-05 ("New pope intervened against Kerry in US 2004 election campaign")

The Drudge Report is my Home Page so as soon as I went on to the Web this morning I saw a headline there that I knew would make the DUmmies go nuts as you can in this THREAD with the same title as in the Drudge Report, “New pope intervened against Kerry in US 2004 election campaign.” Yes, DUmmies, now you can blame the new Pope for keeping the EVIL Bush Regime in power. The DUmmie ants are certainly stirred up this morning which makes for FUN DUFUing. As usual the DUmmies casting their stones against the Pope is shown in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, happily giving the new Pope credit for swinging Ohio into the Bush column, is in the brackets:

New pope intervened against Kerry in US 2004 election campaign

[BEAUTIFUL! Tell us more!]

WASHINGTON (AFP) - German Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, the Vatican theologian who was elected Pope Benedict XVI, intervened in the 2004 US election campaign ordering bishops to deny communion to abortion rights supporters including presidential candidate John Kerry.

In a June 2004 letter to US bishops enunciating principles of worthiness for communion recipients, Ratzinger specified that strong and open supporters of abortion should be denied the Catholic sacrament, for being guilty of a "grave sin."

He specifically mentioned "the case of a Catholic politician consistently campaigning and voting for permissive abortion and euthanasia laws," a reference widely understood to mean Democratic candidate Kerry, a Catholic who has defended abortion rights.

The letter said a priest confronted with such a person seeking communion "must refuse to distribute it.

[Maybe this also knocked Tom Dashole out of the Senate. Didn’t this same thing apply to him as well?]

If bush were Catholic he damned well better be denied the same freakin' thing.

[Why? Did he support abortion?]

Benedict XVI is a despicable, and he has directly intervened in American politics. I hope his reign is short and trouble-ridden. What a jerk. This completely reverses my willingness to have an open-mind about this pope.

[Trust me. You were close-minded from the get-go.]

Nice way to change my disappointment to Anger!

[Soon to change to RAGE once you realize that the new Pope probably switched Ohio from Kerry to Bush. Hee! Hee!]

So The Catholic Church Interfered In A US Election On Behalf Of The GOP

[Yet another example of the Perfect Rovian Storm.]

And Catholics in blue states voted for Kerry while Catholics in red states voted for *. IMHO - no impact.

[Unless it was a red state but only by about 100,000 vote margin such as Ohio. But let a fellow DUmmie make that point now…]

Unless in some close state there were Catholics who would ordinarily have been Democratic. Then it did have an impact as the "red" state would if not for this have been a "blue" state. ie Ohio - may have been like this.

[“May have been?” How about DEFINITELY was? The tentacles of Karl Rove extends even into the Vatican.]

If you look at the exit polls, Kerry won!

[And the actual voting is nothing but a mere formality.]

You'll never know how their votes were counted. Were they counted they way they voted or the way Rove wanted them to vote?

[Stupid question. We all know they voted the way Rove WANTED them to vote.]

I have lots of Liberal Catholic friends who "voted" for Kerry on those damn touchscreens in the RED state of NC. NC had some of THE most f*cked up election "glitches" throughout the state. I believe we went blue!

[Yeah, right. North Carolina went blue. Call in Bev Harris!]

Roman Catholic voters swung to Bush in greater numbers in 2004 than 2000, despite the fact that Kerry, unlike Gore, was himself Roman Catholic. In fact, it's not at all impossible to argue that Roman Catholics, not fundamentalists, were the "moral values" voters that decided the election.

[And this DUmmie wins a Kewpie doll for a very brief moment of mental clarity.]

Ironic if true - remembering how JFK had to fight the idea that he would be controlled by the church. Last year the church apparently was angry that JK voted according to his interpretation of the constitution - and part of the country was mad he wasn't controlled by his church. This must be hurtful to JK who really does seem more religious than most.

[John Kerry seems more religious than most? What? Is riding a snowboard some sort of religious rite that I never heard of before?]

The College of Cardinals just plain blew it on this one; now question about it. I think maybe instead of saying "Viva Il Papa", his Roman parrishoners (he is now the Bishop of Rome) need to say "Seig Heil, Il Papa"! Why, oh why, couldn't they have picked that Cardinal from Honduras?

[Because the last time I checked the College of Cardinals does not reside in DUmmieland.]

Like I said today...This is a declaration of war on liberal American Catholics.

[So? Why don’t you form a breakaway church? Call it The First Church of the Universal Whatever.]

Don't Forget Our Own Senator Byrd Who was once a Klansman. We should not criticize or make comments about Ratzinger being part of the Hitler Youth.

[Big difference. The last time I checked, Sheets Byrd WILLINGLY JOINED the Klan as an ADULT. Plus Byrd rose in the Klan ranks to the Grand High Kleagle or whatever dopey name they give to their bigwigs.]

Yep this Pope is called the Enforcer and is Bush's buddy!!!

[Aren’t they golfing buddies?]

lets see BENEDICT put his money where his mouth is and try to excommunicate some of our Abortion Rights politicians.

[Starting with Nancy Pelosi.]

I don't want to sound mean, but...This better be a short Papacy!

[With your typical DUmmie luck, this Pope will have the lifespan of a goatherder in the Caucuses and live to the ripe old age of 130 so you will stuck with him for another 50 years.]

Catholic Church is a farce, Vatican is a RW Corp. State. Divorce is not allowed. If a Catholic divorces it is considered a sin and any new marriage cannot be in their church. If a Catholic divorces and re-mairies outside of the Catholic Church the marriage is considered invalid and living in sin. Yet, an anullement can be granted with money given to the church even if that marriage was consumated and been going on for years. What a farce!

[Tell that to Joe Kennedy III.]

I say remove the tax exempt status and charge the church with criminal intent to interfere with a U S election.

[If that is the case you would have to haul lots of Black Churches into court.]

I really don't like this guy. He takes pleasure in adulation.

[Perhaps you preferred that he frowned when named Pope?]

I wondered if the Bush cabal would pick the next Pope. They did.

[Wrong. The Rove cabal picked the Pope. Now say as rapidly as you can: “Pied Piper Pitt Picked a Polish Pope and ate a Plate of Pickled Peppers.”]

When you saw JPII all you could think was this guy prays so hard it's giving me a headache. And how about their backgrounds? JP survived the Nazi's, saved a country, helped defeat communism, loved and was loved by billions.

[He defeated communism? That makes him NOT loved by the DUmmies.]

Any church that, for starters, denies women the right to leadership positions AND refuses to allow birth control ... or even condoms to be used to help stop the AIDS pandemic in Africa ... is BULLSHIT! And don't even get me started on a woman's right to have control over her own BODY. I know the Catholic church doesn't care if it has my respect or not ... but it has lost every bit of respect I ever had for the faith of my girlhood. This Rat-zinger is a misogynist and a homophobe. And he can kiss my lapsed-Catholic ass!

[Is that you, Madonna?]

Whatta surprise - another "Swift Pope Veteran for Bush"

[Actually it was “Swift Pope Veterans for Truth” but let’s not quibble over details.]

Whoops. Well, if I were an on-the-fence Catholic before. I'm off now. Anyone have the Episcopilian's number?



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