Wednesday, May 09, 2012

"BREAKING: Obama Embraces Marriage Equality"


This has not been a good week for Barack Obama. The One kicked off his re-election campaign--not that he has ever STOPPED campaigning--Obamassiah kicked off his re-election campaign the other day, and half the crowd in the stadium came disguised as empty seats. The Obama campaign rolled out an ad called "The Life of Julia," which portrays women as lifelong dependents on the federal government, but "Julia" was met with universal mockery. Then yesterday BO did manage to win the WV Dem primary, but 40% of the vote went to a federal inmate named Keith Judd. Enthusiasm gap, anyone? The thrill is gone.

Likewise for the DUmmies as a whole, this has not been a good week. The Democrats' Warren Woman, Lizzie Warren, aka Princess DUmmerfall Winterspring, has been revealed to be a faux squaw. And Kathleen Falk, DUmmieland's choice to run against WI Gov. Walker in the recall election, got drubbed in the Dem primary.

What's more, North Carolina voters yesterday passed a ban on homo marriage, by a vote of over 60%. So what did Dear Leader do just now today? He came out in favor of homo marriage! Forward, BO! Forward! Yes, Barry, you go ahead and SPIT in the face of the voters of North Carolina, a state you MUST carry to win in November! The economy is in shambles, the debt is skyrocketing, gasoline prices are sky-high, jobs are scarce--and Barry's big move is to massage Bawney Fwank's . . . ego.

Democrats across the land must be sweating nervously, as they contemplate the Community Organizer-in-Chief dragging them down to defeat this fall. But in DUmmieland--in DUmmieland, the sound of REJOICING resounds o'er every hill and vale! Huzzah! Huzzah! FINALLY, President Obama has come to his senses and come out in favor of marriage equality! This is a Great Day in the history of the world! Sodomite marriage--the issue that will carry Progressives to victory in November and on into the ages of ages to come! Tears of joy are flowing freely. Dozens of threads to celebrate. We'll go with this THREAD, "BREAKING: Obama Embraces Marriage Equality."

So let us enter the DUmmieland Den of Denial, in Bolshveik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, applauding the President's unintentional War on Democrats, is in the [Barackets]:

BREAKING: Obama Embraces Marriage Equality

[BREAKING FORTH IN JOY: DUmmies Embrace Obama's Empty Pandering to teh Gheys]

President Obama has come out . . .

[FINALLY! We were all wondering when he would admit the obvious. . . . Oh, wait, there's more . . .]

President Obama has come out in support of marriage equality. . . .

[On behalf of all husbands everywhere, I appreciate the sentiment.]

. . . for gay and lesbian people. . . .

[Oh. Never mind.]

OBAMA: I have to tell you that over the course of several years as I have talked to friends and family and neighbors when I think about members of my own staff who are in incredibly committed monogamous relationships, same-sex relationships, who are raising kids together. . . .

[Here's a clue, Obama. If they are in "same-sex relationships," they CANNOT have kids together. It is physically impossible. They may "raise" them, but they cannot HAVE them.]

when I think about those soldiers or airmen or marines or sailors. . . .

[You mean the seamen?]

I’ve just concluded that for me personally it is important for me to go ahead and affirm that I think same sex couples should be able to get married.

[Note: Nothing has changed because of BO coming out with this opinion today. But you'd think it was the greatest day since the dawn of fruit roll-ups, judging by the DUmmies' reaction . . .]

Bravo Mr. President!

[WHEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!]

Now we just need to help him and the Dems in November to finalize equality!

[Go for it! Forward! Sodomy today, bestiality tomorrow!]

He was in Albany the other day and had a meeting with Cuomo.

[Cuomo is a huomo? I did not know that. Are they planning to tie the knot?]

F***ing HUGE!!! I'm spreading this far and wide!

[Is that what Cuomo said? Well, you know what they say. . . .]

Oh, yes, it is! Yes indeed!

[Cuomo was VERY excited.]

HOLY F***ING SH*T!!!

[That's one way to describe it.]

Tweety says this is earth-shaking.

[Chrissy Matthews is VERY jealous.]

well, the handwriting was on the wall. . . .

[And it said, "For a good time, call Ken, 555-3124."]

I guess we have Joe Biden to thank for causing the issue to be brought to a head. . . .

[Plugs Biden--oh, God love ya, what am I sayin'? It is IMPOSSIBLE to avoid double entendres in this thread!]

I think a lot of iffy, kind of dejected voters are pumped up now.

[Obama was wanting to fire up the base. . . . DARN! See what I mean?]

The crap he is going to take right now will be worth it in the end.

[I give up.]

Of course, this will likely cost him my bigoted state of NC. . . .

[Hee! Hee! And may Ohio, Pennsylvania, Virginia, Florida, and all the other bigoted swing states be added to the list!]

Two thumbs up.

[The Ben Burch Seal of Approval.]

24 Comments:

Blogger Skul said...

Troggyboy drops the soap, and grabs his little ankles.

7:45 PM  
Blogger 98ZJUSMC said...

when I think about those soldiers or airmen or marines or sailors. . . .



W-wha-what?!?

I’ve just concluded that for me personally it is important for me to go ahead and affirm that I think same sex couples should be able to get married.

Aids, Aids, Aids!

Everybody has Aids!!

7:54 PM  
Anonymous The ULTIMATE Man said...

I bet Troglafuck is overjoyed that his god embraces men sodomizing each other and that Obamassiah wants to send us down the path to the legalization of bestiality, incest and polygamy.

8:18 PM  
Anonymous James said...

Gay marriage is for suckers.

10:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Pandermonium!

10:57 PM  
Blogger Trog said...

"What's more, North Carolina voters yesterday passed a ban on homo marriage, by a vote of over 60%. So what did Dear Leader do just now today? He came out in favor of homo marriage!" PJinc

Homo marriage. So so scary. Why? Homo marriage is a gateway to fucking your dog. That's why. The mighty troglaman's inner homo tried to get him to fuck a pigeon the other day. A male pigeon. Can you believe it? A goddamn man-pigeon. What's next? A friggin razor clam? A llama? The little bitch is out to get me, and the rest of us, arrested and damned to Hell. Mark my words.

I'm with you on this one, my brothers. If we give in to these vile perversions, we're all lost. It will turn into a real life "True Blood" for sure.

11:43 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"Obamassiah kicked off his re-election campaign the other day, and half the crowd in the stadium came disguised as empty seats." PJinc

Wrong.

11:53 PM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

Troglaman - The Official Troll of the DUmmie FUnnies Blog Site howled...

"Obamassiah kicked off his re-election campaign the other day, and half the crowd in the stadium came disguised as empty seats." PJinc

Wrong.


While you are technically correct (accidents happen) you're still coming on here drunk and higher than a kite because as usual you don't know who the heck wrote the blog entry.

Still got to keep proving you're an idiot, don't you Guttersnipe?

1:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Wrong."
-Troglaman

Wow. That stung.

10:00 AM  
Anonymous Corona said...

Yeah, double entendres are pretty much standard in articles like this.

10:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Question: Is the pickup in votes and money from the gay community going to offset the loss from the Christian community?

I think we're going to see a lot of believers sitting at home on election day.

1:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

STFU

2:22 PM  
Anonymous The ULTIMATE Man said...

FOAD Troglafuck, you racist fucking fuckwad.

4:14 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"...Obamassiah wants to send us down the path to the legalization of bestiality, incest and polygamy." TUMmy ache

See? You fuckers are bigger pussies than the goddamn gays! Jesus. It's embarrassing.

"OMG! Obama says I have to lick a cat's balls and marry my three spastic sisters!"

Fucking drama queen. You're gayer than gay.

11:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Obama can get gay votes -but at the same time he loses votes from those are logical and Christian. The rights of gay people do not need any more pampering. Marriage is between a man and a woman - period.

All in all it means that he won't be re-elected.

5:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Obummer made that choice for one reason - MONEY.

He's always supported gay marriage. Biden saying what he did put Obummer on the spot - throw his veep under the bus or make sure he keeps the big bucks from reprobates. He chose the money. This also spit in the face of the voters where his minions will hold their convention to renominate him.

Money over everything. Just like Obummer always does.

12:11 PM  
Anonymous The ULTIMATE Man said...

You're a worthless fucking fuckwad you worthless fucking fuckwad. FOAD Troglafuck you sorry fucking slimeball.

12:12 PM  
Anonymous troglaman said...

"The rights of gay people do not need any more pampering." TroglANON

Pampering? Is that you, Marie Antoinette?

YES! Indeed. Let them eat cake!

The fact that you find same-sex marriage threatening in any way says much more about YOU than it does about gay people. Why? Because it exposes your fear, you fucking pussy. Plain and simple. You think gay marriage is a threat. That, and that alone, makes you a Kitty Queen.

And...the fact that you're passing yourself off as logical and Christian is beyond the pale. You're neither. You're a scared little Napoleonic brat running around saying shit like WE'VE PAMPERED THE GAYS ENOUGH! OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!

And you don't even know you're doing it. That's the best part, you camel-toed prig.

1:00 AM  
Anonymous krazy kat said...

Nothing like a gay themed thread to bring out the worst in everybody.

9:43 AM  
Anonymous The JUDGE said...

What it shows Troglatwit, you worthless son of a worthless fucking bastard, is some people have morals and standards. You don't have either and have proved it over and over you worthless son of a worthless fucking bastard. So your rants are simply those of a sick perverted bastard who doesn't give a damn about anyone or anything beyond the sick pervert you see in the mirror every day.

You are a worthless son of a worthless fucking bastard, and your opinion is as useful as tits on a boar.

4:13 AM  
Anonymous The ULTIMATE Man said...

Just as I thought, Troglafuck...you're too fucking stupid to fucking understand logic so you're too fucking stupid to understand that legalizing men sodomizing each other will lead us down the path to the legalization of bestiality, incest and polygamy. More sick perverted fuckwads like you Troglafuck will just use the same arguments that the deviants today are using, and you're fucking cheering it on you stupid fuck because you're a brain dead fucking pervert yourself.

FOAD Troglafuck you stupid fucking fucked up fuckwad.

11:59 AM  
Anonymous Adam said...

"Obama can get gay votes -but at the same time he loses votes from those are logical and Christian."
True.
Obama is too stupid to realize how much this will hurt him. The black vote was what helped get him elected in 2008, but the majority of African- Americans are not big fans of gay marriage, or gays in general. In California, blacks voted much more heavily in favor of Prop 8 than any other racial groups. So, this announcement likely cost Obama most of the support of what was once his most loyal voting demographic. It'll probably also cost him a lot of the Hispanic vote, since they too usually aren't fond of gays.

8:30 AM  
Anonymous Tom said...

If I may ... I don't leave comments, so here's a first. I thought these might be pertinent. I'm not certain if this kind of post is allowed, but here goes.

This first item is taken from Weasel Zippers ....

Dwight McKissic, pastor of Cornerstone Baptist Church in Arlington, wrote in a blog on May 9 that Obama’s statements are worthy of incurring wrath of biblical proportions.

“President Obama has betrayed the Bible and the Black Church with his endorsement of same-sex marriage. The Bible is crystal clear on this subject, and the Black Church strongly opposes same-sex marriage. His endorsement is an inadvertent attack on the Christian Faith. America is now a candidate for the same judgment received by Sodom and Gomorrah. This was a sad, sad day and a very bad decision, by our beloved President. The moral impact of this day and decision is equal to the military impact of AL-Queda when they attacked the Twin Towers on 911. Today’s announcement is a moral earthquake equivalent to a tsunami or hurricane that will have far more devastating results than Katrina.”

3:09 PM  
Anonymous The ULTIMATE Man said...

Dwight McKissic, pastor of Cornerstone Baptist Church in Arlington, wrote in a blog on May 9 that Obama’s statements are worthy of incurring wrath of biblical proportions.

“President Obama has betrayed the Bible and the Black Church with his endorsement of same-sex marriage. The Bible is crystal clear on this subject, and the Black Church strongly opposes same-sex marriage. His endorsement is an inadvertent attack on the Christian Faith. America is now a candidate for the same judgment received by Sodom and Gomorrah. This was a sad, sad day and a very bad decision, by our beloved President. The moral impact of this day and decision is equal to the military impact of AL-Queda when they attacked the Twin Towers on 911. Today’s announcement is a moral earthquake equivalent to a tsunami or hurricane that will have far more devastating results than Katrina.”


Thanks Tom...I was wondering if any black clergyman had the backbone to label this for what it is.

5:55 PM  

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