Thursday, December 10, 2009

Angry DUmmies call for REVOLUTION!!!

The DUmmies are revolting! Well, OK, you already knew that. No, what I'm talking about is "revolting" as in THE REVOLUTION!!! The DUmmies are ANGRY! They're up in arms! They're ready to hit the streets! DUAC! DUAC!

So before we begin, let's sing this Ode to the Angry DUmmie:

Tune: "That's Amore"

When the Moonbats go wild
With the sh*t that they've piled,
That's a DUmmie.
When they've plain lost their heads
Like they've gone off their meds,
That's a DUmmie.

Hopes will fly,
Soaring to the sky, rising way up high
Like a giant sequoia.
Hands will wring--
What a ding-a-ling, what a ding-a-ling--
And you'll think, "Paranoia."

When the "F" words flow free
Just like on MTV,
That's a DUmmie.
When they march in the street
Without leaving their seat,
You're in luck:

Those aren't Rovian plants,
They're just Ants in their rants,
And they're FUnnie!
For a laugh and a half
Reading each paragraph--
That's a DUmmie!

Now the ironic thing is that the DUmmies are calling for REVOLUTION precisely at a time when their DEMOCRATS are controlling everything! But Mr. Hopey-Changey and the DC Dems have let them down bigtime! Therefore . . . TO THE STREETS! MAN THE BARRICADES! You can almost hear "The Internationale" playing in the background as you read this
THREAD, "Revolution is coming, and if you are 50 or younger it's coming in your lifetime."

So grab your pitch and torchfork as we survey the seeds of REVOLUTION, in Bolshevik Red, while the calm commentary of your humble guest correspondent, the wag tailoring the doggerel, Charles Henrickson, is in the [brackets]:

Revolution is coming, and if you are 50 or younger it's coming in your lifetime.

[OK, I'm 56. Can you hurry things up? This would be FUn to watch, and I don't want to miss it.]

We've got a government of the wealthy, by the wealthy and for the wealthy. We've got a bunch of millionaires and billionaires running the show in Congress, in the Executive and in the Judiciary.

[And they're mostly . . . DEMOCRATS. Yes, the Democrat Party. Brought to you by George $oro$.]

But, what the wealthy in power fail to understand is the seething anger of the people. And, the truth is, there are more of us than there are of them.

[Great Seethers Host!]

there will be revolution. And, sadly, it will be bloody. There will be riots in the streets.

[There will be LAFF riots here at DUmmie FUnnies, as we watch you Keyboard Kastros rise up out of the sugar cane fields and overthrow the Baracktista Regime!]

Barack Obama won't save us. The Democratic Party won't save us. God (if there is a god) won't save us. We can only save ourselves.

[We are the revolutionaries we've been waiting for!]

Revolution is coming. Mark my words.

[Mock my words. Thank you, DUmmie rateyes. Now your comrades respond . . .]

horray for everything. bring it on!

[WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!! Revolution is FUn!!!]

We need a revolution, but not one that is violent.

[Aw, that kind of takes all the FUn out of it!]

Non-violent revolution. Hey, maybe it could be a reality show.

[I can see it now: "Who Wants to Insult a Millionaire?"]

I dunno about it being non-violent. I look around me. I really do. What do I see? France, late 1790's.

[Let them eat rice cake!]

Right The F*ck On!! What in the name of all that's sane, is the "Left" so g*dd*mned afraid of?? . . . We're dying in the streets, NOW!!

[Somewhere! In my imagination, maybe!!]

the right has us beat hands down on crazy. Our strategic reserves of batsh*t are sort of low.

[Oh, I don't know about that. You sell yourselves short.]

Who is dying in which streets? I have no problem with passion. I do have a problem with nonsense, however passionate.

[And you, DUmmie jberryhill, win today's Kewpie Doll, for this Brief Moment of Mental Clarity.]

As I said many. many moons ago, "Bring it down!"

[As I said many, many moonbats ago: "You're NUts!"]

everyone is just too fat and lazy.

[Sorry, only one Kewpie Doll per thread.]

as long as folks have iphones and internet connections, things will stay the same.

[What hath Algore wrought?]

I think this is on target. We will be masses of serfs.

[Serfs up!]

I thought you said Smurfs.

[The Blue Revolution begins today!]

Will it be a teabagger kind of revolution, or a your kind of revolution?

[Forget the Teabaggers! It's the Charge of the Latte Brigade! Barista vs. Batista!]

I anticipate watching on the news from somewhere in the Netherlands. Good luck.

[Start the revolution without me!]

welfare, and unemployment, and such like programs were put together in response to rioting farmers and hobos and such, who were hijacking milk delivery trucks. . . .

[We shall Oberweis some day. . . .]

When you don't get little tremors to relieve the stress on a fault, when a quake comes it is big. I think we are looking at the San Adreas Big One coming.

[Bush's Fault!]


[¡Viva la Revolución!]

It's going to start this spring. . . . We are looking for 5000 seriously committed folk to kick this off. We want 1000 people arrested each day. Clogging up major thoroughfares and filling up their jails. It will coincide with the 7th anniversary of our illegal and immoral invasion of Iraq. Big doings in DC this March!

[The Month When Everything Finally Changed.]

If you don't believe most of the BushCo elite are still running the show, you're delusional.

[The reason Barack won't let you see his birth certificate is . . . he's Poppy's long-lost love child! Yes, it's true!]

Welcome to Silly Season on DU. it's the only place to go when you're a political junkie, your party has all the power, and yet your life is not magically golden.

[Hee! Hee!]

the biggest woo woo thread i have ever seen on DU. these people have lost their minds.

[Woo! Woo!]

Maybe we'll get hit by a comet.

[Cancel the revolution!]

I'm sorry, I'd like to believe in it. I used to believe in it. But now? No, its not happening and if it does, it'll be a 15 second spot on the evening news between the commercials for Survivor and Lady Gaga.

[I *want* to BELIEEEEEEEEEEEEEVE!!!!!!!!!!!]

It just seems like this notion of revolution or civil war is being romanticized here.

[Ya think?]

Power to the People

[Right on! Right on!]

Let's say it does happen. What then? Who leads the Country in the aftermath? How do we re-establish leadership?

[It could easily be accomplished with a computer. A computer could be set and programmed to accept factors from youth, health, sexual fertility, intelligence, and a cross-section of necessary skills.]

we only have ourselves to blame for the coming storm. And I agree...there is a nasty storm brewin.

[A perfect REVOLTIAN storm!]

Great. You want a revolution, the freepers want a civil war. Is there any way we could resolve this without killing ourselves?

[Beer Summit II?]'s already begun.

[The revolution is kind of like a sealed Rove indictment: It's already happened, it's just that nobody knows about it yet.]

Hit them where it hurts - a peaceful economic revolution. . . . Stay out of Wal-Mart as much as possible. . . . Give up your football tickets. Your NASCAR tickets. . . . Cut back on your alcohol.

[Pitt was with you up till that point.]

I'm 51 so I'll miss it!. . . sh*t so I'll miss the revelation by one year?

[Sorry! No revelation OR revolution for you!]

Aux Barricades!

[Liberté! Égalité! Fraternité!]

V for Vendetta

[D for DUmmie.]


Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is perfect for troggy the simpering tool, to PROVE his superior intellect.
All yours troggy boy. Have at it sparky.


12:30 AM  
Anonymous Jerome Goolsby said...

I hope the Moonbats do take up arms against the government. I'm betting there are a lot of people in this country would love the chance to gun down a few of these guttersnipes before they have a chance to multiply.

1:03 AM  
Anonymous DumbAss Tanker said...

Yehyehyeh, sure kid, rivers of blood, heads on pikes, sure. Now get the damn' burgers fried.

Oh yeah, I LOVED the Dr. Strangelove reference in this piece! Great work.

9:28 AM  
Anonymous kayinmaine said...

While my kid was away at Demonstration School I got him the ultimit HOLIDAY present for the new, hopeful America! I had this painted covering his whole bedroom ceiling!

Cost a ton but is soooooooooooooooo inlightined! WERE IN CONTROL NOW! WE RULE!!!!!!!!!!

12:46 PM  
Anonymous Corona said...

" - she said to her empty room.

3:39 PM  
Anonymous Corona said...

Yeah, I liked the Strangelove quote too. As I read it Sellers' accent came to mind. " be bred and SLAUGHTERED!..." Heh.

3:42 PM  
Anonymous Elrond Hubbard said...

Welcome to Silly Season on DU. It's the only place to go when you're a poltical junkie, your party has all the power, and yet your life is not magically golden.

A Dummie with a bit of insight and a sense of humor. Rare items in the fever swamp. Apparent in this thread is a growing sense of disappointment with Obama. The DUmmies anticipated a progressive utopia but got an reckless spending spree instead.

But the DUmmies are right, the future in bleak---and they voted for it.

5:07 PM  
Anonymous Elrond Hubbard said...

"...the future is bleak..."

...must proof read.

5:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"We want 1000 people arrested each day. Clogging up major thoroughfares and filling up their jails."-DUmmie

'We'll choke their rivers with our dead!'

I'm sure the DUmmie Crack Suicide Squad is training as we speak.

6:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

PJ... your stuff is golden. Why dont you have a paypal link for donations? You deserve em son !! Meanwhile im resighting my AR-15 for the coming Dummies !!! Big FUn!

8:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Somehow I think we're going to see 1968 all over again pretty soon.

Maybe Dan Rather could come out of retirement to get decked by a security guard at the next Democratic National Convention.

11:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

now I among your readers

12:06 PM  
Anonymous Shambhala said...

Theyre working themselves into a froth.

Unfortunately there is no "reset" button to getting shot.

They may want to rethink "La Revolucion"

11:03 PM  

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