"Chelsea Manning": DUmmies get behind the whistle-blower

Bush, Cheney, and Rummy: war criminals, and they remain free. Bradley Manning: whistle-blower, and he gets sentenced to 35 years in prison. Where is the justice? Justice for Treyson! This sums up the DUmmies' reaction to the sentencing of Nothing-Is-Private Manning.

But that was yesterday. Today comes news that Bradley--who at one time had called himself "Brianna"--now wants to be known as "Chelsea" and live as a woman. Bradley is no longer manning.

Multiple threads the last couple of days, too many to link to them all. We'll start with this THREAD, "Bradley Manning sentanced to 35 years."

But before we get to the DUmmies, I think we should hear from Chelsea herself. Click the music link and sing along!

 

CHELSEA MANNING
Tune: "Chelsea Morning"

Woke up, and I was Chelsea Manning
And the first thing that I said
Was I wanted to be female
And wear wigs upon my head
If you think you'd like to buy me bras
And wrap them up, I take A-cup

Oh, don't you guess
I'll put on a dress
And I'll wear a bunch of make-up

Woke up, and I was Chelsea Manning
And the first thing that I saw
Was a thirty-five-year sentence
And no rainbow on the wall
All those big strong men to welcome me
Criminals can be so hardened

O, won't you please
I'm on my knees
Give this little girl a pardon

Now the cell door opens on my new friends for the day
And the hall is filled, they form a line
And two'd be fine
But look, there's nine
Whistles to blow today

Woke up, and I was Chelsea Manning
And the first thing that I know
That I now realize I'm lesbian
I should go where women go
And I don't like this place that I'm in
So stick me with some hormones

Oh, let me stay
Where I'll be okay
And we'll talk in diff'rent pronouns

When the cell door closes
And the rainbows all recede
I will tell you secrets
Hear me speak
The stuff you seek
Is what I'll leak
The only thing I need
Pretty badly, I'm not

Bradley, now I'm Chelsea Manning

So let us now go to DUmmiLeaks, in Cherry Lip Gloss Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, the wag tailoring the doggerel, Charles Henrickson, is in the [brackets]:

Bradley Manning sentanced to 35 years - just breaking. Dishonorable discharge, forfeits pay and benefits, rank reduced. Eligible for parole in 10, time served will be counted.

[You DUmmies should be happy he got off so easy.]

Can he earn time off for good behavior?

[Yes, he will have to learn to keep his legs together and sit gracefully.]

Manning sentenced to 35 years, this should be a national day of mourning

[Woke up, it was a Chelsea mourning. . . .]

Can President Obama issue him a pardon at the end of his term?

[Why not NOW? Justice for Treyson NOW! If Obama had a son--or daughter--it would look like Chelsea.]

I hope he can appeal.

[Oh, I'm sure he will appeal.]

Bradley Manning sentenced to 35 years. War criminals? Zero.

[It's a mixed-up, muddled-up, shook-up world.]

President Obama should pardon him. but he wont.

[IMPEACH OBAMA NOW!]

President Obama should give him Obama's undeserved Peace Prize.

[Oooh! Burn!]

Why I think Bradley Manning should do time.

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

Manning tossed in a hole, Bushco to be immune to war crimes... What a proud time to be a democrat!

[Thank your Obamassiah--who, btw, has not closed Gitmo, and continues to use drones, and spies on Americans, and how come you guys are not protesting HIM?]

I feel sad for Manning. I know what he did was wrong and dangerous . . . but I think he was doing what he thought was right for his own reasons.

[Well, I guess that makes it alright then.]

Poll: Manning traitorous, deserves prison, not a hero

[LOUSY FREEPER POLL!!!]

The lead attorney for Army Private first class Bradley Manning told the media on Wednesday that he’ll begin asking US President Barack Obama to pardon his client as early as next week.

[Manning will be free within 24 business hours. Bank it. The pardon is sealed in a mason jar on Eric Holder's desk.]

i think there is a better chance of the planet Jupiter making me its Facebook friend, than him getting the pardon from Obama

[Bradley Manning, benburch would like to be friends with Uranus.]

Bradley Manning says he plans to live as a woman and begin hormone therapy: "I Am Chelsea Manning"

[Interesting timing for this news, a day after the sentencing. This is either an invitation to the boys in the prison or an attempt to get transferred to a women's facility.]

Manning says is female, wants to live as a woman

[Notice the missing pronoun. Even this DUmmie is confused.]

Chelsea Manning or Bradley Manning?

[Free 'em both!]

It's a bit much to digest.

[It's a bit much to sw-- no, let's try that again. . . .]

It's a bit much to digest.

[Yeah, I was just getting used to "Brianna." Where did this "Chelsea" come from?]

She identifies as a woman. Get it? She wants to be called Chelsea. Get it?

[Whatever Chelsea wants, Chelsea gets!]

Bradley Manning: I want to live as a woman

[I want to live as a millionaire, Brad, but that ain't happenin'. If wishes were fishes, we'd be swimmin' in the sea.]