Saturday, October 15, 2005

DUmmie FUnnies 10-15-05 ("DeLay's prosecutors lack a key document")

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Call me sacreligious or a heretic but I really am starting to think the MAIN purpose for the creation of the Universe was so that the Almighty could LAUGH at the FRUSTRATIONS of the DUmmies. I mean their legendary letdowns have occurred with such amazing regularity that one has to think that a Higher Power must be at work to arrange all this. This very Blog began with the SeeBS phony National Guard document scandal which blew up in the DUmmies' faces right after their exultant gloating. Then again the DUmmies were JUBILANT over the overwhelming Kerry victory according to the exit polls only to be bitterly disappointed later on election night. And this cycle has continued OVER and OVER again. It even preceded the DUmmie FUnnies themselves with the 2000 and 2002 elections. Yes I remember well how the DUmmies celebrated the 2002 election prior to the polls closing especially since their very own Terry McAwful gloatingly declared that Jeb Bush was defeated in his re-election bid for Florida's governor a few days BEFORE the election. And so now we come to Tom DeLay about whom the DUmmies have been recently drooling at the mouth over his indictment. Unfortunately for the DUmmies, this ACME Co. case has just now exploded in their faces due to the fact that Texas District Attorney, Ronnie Earle, has pulled a Mary Mapes act as you can see in this Houston Chronicle ARTICLE titled, "DeLay's prosecutors lack a key document." This article is also the subject of a VERY FRUSTRATED DUmmie THREAD of the same name. You see, according to the Puke of Earle it isn't the authenticity of a document that counts but what it says whether or not it is fake. This is EXACTLY the Mary Mapes position on documents. Perhaps the Puke of Earle could write the Introduction to the Mapes book. And now let us take the Cosmic POV and watch the DUmmies ONCE AGAIN go flying into the air like Charlie Brown screaming in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, hearing Tom DeLay going "BEEP! BEEP!" in the distance, is in the [brackets]:

DeLay's prosecutors lack a key document

[Mary Mapes and Dan Rather also lack a key document.]

They don't have list of candidates at the heart of the laundering case, just a 'similar' one
Copyright 2005 Houston Chronicle Austin Bureau

[Was it faxed in from the Abilene Kinko's?]

AUSTIN - Travis County prosecutors admitted Friday they lack physical proof of a list of Republican candidates that is at the heart of money-laundering indictments against U.S. Rep. Tom DeLay and two of his associates.

[That's okay. Mary Mapes forgives you.]

The list is key to prosecutors being able to prove that corporate money that could not be legally spent on Texas candidates was specifically exchanged at the national level for donations that legally could be spent on Republican candidates for the Texas House.

[Isn't that the same list that "proved" that Bush went AWOL from the National Guard?]

Indictments against DeLay, Jim Ellis and John Colyandro state that Ellis gave "a document that contained the names of several candidates for the Texas House" to a Republican National Committee official in 2002 in a scheme to swap $190,000 in restricted corporate money for the same amount of money from individuals that could be legally used by Texas candidates.

[I think the name of that RNC official was Lucy Ramirez.]

But prosecutors said Friday in court that they only had a "similar" list and not the one allegedly received by then-RNC Deputy Director Terry Nelson. Late in the day, they released a list of 17 Republican candidates, but only seven are alleged to have received money in the scheme.

[Does that list have peripheral spacing? And now to amuse ourselves with the incredible level of frustration comedically expressed by the DUmmies over this latest development...]

Please don't tell me! Kick for answers

[I'm telling you. The ACME Co. package has EXPLODED in your face again!!!]

if he gets off scott free...I will simply

[Since your sentence ended abruptly, I believe you were about to type "die" but then suddenly assumed that state before finishing. Enjoy your cruise up the River Styx!]

These sob's never seem to be answerable to anyone.

[And they LOVE to mock you with their "BEEP! BEEP!" as they leave you in the dust.]

Why on earth did Earle go after Deay if he didn't have the goods. Sounds like DeLay is a free man. I'm afraid poor Earle's career will be over.
Now if the same sort of thing happens to Rove, Libby etc, the Republicans will be stronger than ever - and nothing will ever happen again - even if they more blately break the law.

[You should have had a clue as to what a PHONY the Puke of Earle was when his ENTIRE case against Kay Bailey Hutchison completely COLLAPSED on the same day it went to trial. Oh, and let us now mourn the Puke of Earle's documentary which will now be re-released as a comedy.]

Does this have to be proved on reasonable doubt?

[Um...yes. Or would you prefer it be proved on unreasonable doubt.]

Don't panic. DeLay's propaganda machine is in high gear. Essentially what we're seeing here is the old 'they ain't got a thing on me' ploy.

[Didn't you reassure us about the authenticy of the TANG documents last year?]

So why wouldn't he be able to get the list...this sounds like nonsense.

[And this DUmmie wins a Kewpie Doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity!]

I bet he's got that list.

[Bill Burkette is holding it in trust for him.]


Blogger DrPat said...

Hi, again, PJ! I have cited DUmmie FUnnies again in my Weekly BlogSpot on, this week titled simply "Karl Rove."

I bet you know where I'm going with this... Yep, I used your phrase, "Perfect Rovian Storm." It's linked to your Blogger post rather than the Free Republic site.

To check out your citiation, join the two lines below into a single URL:

Thanks for your endurance in placing these gems into the appropriate settings for them, thereby enhancing their humor!

3:10 PM  
Blogger Son Of The Godfather said...

Watch them seethe, and then despair...


2:55 AM  
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