DUmmie FUnnies 02-23-06 ("Can freepers be deprogrammed?")

I found the title of this DUmmie THREAD, "Can freepers be deprogrammed?" especially amusing since I just received a personal FreepMail message at the Free Republic from none other than DUmmie Doohickie. In case you don't remember DUmmie Doohickie, he was the author of some of our FAVORITE DUmmie threads called "I BELIEVE" in which he was cheerleading the DUmmie to BEEEELEEEEVE that John Kerry was going to be inaugurated on Jan. 20, 2005. These threads began shortly after the 2004 election and lasted until early Jan. 2005 when Doohickie took an embarrassed exit from DUmmieland but has recently returned. Here is the FreepMail that Doohickie sent to me:

"At this point, I must ask....is Doohickie one of us? NOBODY among the DUbies refers to the President as W....."

It's kind of funny what one finds when one does a search on his own username.

At this point, I *am* one of you, since I had to join the Freepers to send you a PM.

But, no, I am no Repbulican. I am in fact a registered Democrat. I live in Texas, though, and W is what I call Bush. Molly Ivins, the syndicated columnist, often refers to him as Dubya, and I used W as a shorthand for that. I think you read too much into my use of the W.

I'm obviously disappointed with the outcome of the election, and also with the way things have gone in the country since then. But I'm also flattered in a way that my threads over on DU garnered so much attention by the Freepers.

You will probably notice the spelling of my Freeper username: Doohickee. I actually registered Doohickie a long time ago (around the time of the I Believe threads), and it took me about 2 posts to get punted off FreeRepublic. Apparently the Freepers aren't all that keen on free speech.

Anyway, tell the gang over in Freeperland I said hi and make some more jokes about me if it makes you feel better.

Still believing in America,

Doohickie

Yes, I BEEEEEELEEEEEEVE this was DUmmie Doohickie. So this DUFU edition about Deprogramming is dedicated to DUmmie Doohickie along with a hearty thanx for the MANY laughs he has provided us with his "I Believe" threads which exposed MANY DUmmies who are in real need of deprogramming. As usual, the undeprogrammed DUmmie recitations are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, who BEEEEEEELEEEEEEEVES that John Kerry will be inaugurated on January 20, is in the [brackets]:

Can freepers be deprogrammed?

[I BEEEEEELEEEEEEVE John Kerry will be inaugurated on Jan. 20.]

I've read articles about people who have joined cults. In many cases, their parents hired someone to "kidnap" them and then put them through a regimen to "deprogram" them.

[You are just $10 away from being deprogrammed.]

I personally believe that freepers, as well as all other types of Bush zombies, comprise a cult. They are programmed (brainwashed) to absorb, digest and repeat any piece of wingnut propaganda being fed to them.

[They are programmed to robotically chant: "I BEEEEEEELEEEEEVE John Kerry will be inaugurated on Jan. 20."]

So I'm asking psychiatrists, psychologists and the well-informed out there, is it possible to deprogram these people?

[Let's ask a real expert: DUmmie Doohickie.]

The problem is they are uneducated.
Therefore, there's nothing to deprogram. They are just trying to hang on to their own ignorance and for some reason want to drag everyone else down with them.

[We are so uneducated that not only do we BEEEEELEEEEVE that John Kerry will be inaugurated on Jan. 20 but we also BEEEEELEEEEEVE that Al Gore is now president in an Alternate Universe.]

Go read a couple of "Pray for President Bush" threads
The people at FReakRepublic are flat out nuts. There used to be some sane ones, but they got driven out or quit in disgust. Not to mention the yearly purges. They continually refine their craziness by not allowing any dissent.

[Can we also read a couple of "I Believe" threads? Or how about a Hopi Indian prayer thread? Or an astrological thread predicting the fall of Bush because the moon is rising in Uranus? And if that doesn't work would sending $10 to Bev Harris help in overturning the election? Oh, and I BEEEEELEEEEVE the draft will take place by April. Oh, that was supposed to have been April 2005. Never mind. Instead I will maintain my faith that June 16th is the Day When Everything Is Finally Going To Change. I BEEEEEELEEEEEVE! And have yourself a Merry Fitzmas!]

I could recommend some medication: Lamotrigine.

[DUmmies are experts in medications. In fact you can find a whole list of meds in the 06-27-05 DUFU edition titled, How many of us here take antidepressants?]

Years ago, we used to hear about families who had a family member that got mixed up into religious cults, and how these families would get "deprogrammers" to deprogram what these religious nut cults had brainwashed their family members with. We stopped hearing stories about this at about the same time that the Right Wing Nuts started gaining power in the government. Of course, these Right Wing Nuts finally achieved their complete power grab of the government, after years of harassing and smearing Bill Clinton and any Democrat that got in their way. So, does anyone believe their is a relationship with this?

[Absolutely. Vicious rightwingers discovered that deprogrammed DUmmies weren't FUnnie any more so they decided to leave them in their original condition. After all, if all DUmmies were deprogrammed, the DUmmie FUnnies would lose all its comedy material, ESPECIALLY DUmmie Doohickie's HILARIOUS "I Believe" threads.]