DUmmie FUnnies 11-24-04 PM Edition ("JOHN KERRY has to contest this election IMMEDIATELY...")

Like Snow White yearning for her Prince to come, the despondent Dummies are hoping for John Kerry to come to the rescue and save them from another four years of the Bush Fascist regime by challenging the election results in Ohio. They think that Kerry has been sending them subtle hints for the past couple of weeks that the DUmmies have been latching onto. Every Kerry statement is examined carefully for secret coded messages to the “troops.” However, it is now dawning upong them that cheapskate Kerry isn’t going to spend a cent of the millions of campaign funds he hoarded away in order to challenge the election results. You can see the DUmmie pleading in this hilarious THREAD titled, “JOHN KERRY has to contest this election IMMEDIATELY, or all is lost!” As usual the desperate Dummie pleadings for their Prince to save them are in Bolshevik Red while the comments of your humble correspondent, amused by DUmmie despondency, are in the [brackets]:

JOHN KERRY has to contest this election IMMEDIATELY, or all is lost!

[Psst! All is lost. Oh, and a contribution to the Kerry ’08 Presidential Campaign Fund would be greatly appreciated.]

Enough with the subtle approach!! It isn't working. We are being stonewalled! Kerry/Edwards have the resources to open this thing up NOW! It can't be successfully done without them! Bev Harris, Nader, the Greens, the Ohio Democratic Party, and many others on this board have broken the ice for them - now it's time for them to close the deal and live up to their "every vote will count" promise. If Kerry got more votes, but Bush is allowed to assume office, then NONE of the 50 some odd million votes counted! NONE!!

[Have you considered the bizarre notion that maybe, just maybe, Bush got more votes?]

This cannot be tolerated! This will be the second presidential election in a row stolen by this administration. If Bush is simply allowed to assume office, and the fraud is revealed some time later - Bush cannot be removed from office without impeachment - and the GOP/Delay controlled Congress will NEVER ever impeach him! These thugs will also NEVER pass legislation abolishing their new ticket to rigging EVERY election in their favor!

[On the up side, your contributions to Bev Harris will go a long way to help her in producing a vote fraud documentary. At least she will come out ahead.]

I am anything but a defeatist, and I'm sorry to be coming off as such an alarmist, but there is simply no other way for justice to prevail here. This may be our last shot as restoring democracy to this country for generations! Kerry (whom I've always admired) MUST take a Gore-like stance NOW! The fraud in this election absolutely DWARFS 2000! Yes, we all know that Kerry will be "Gored" by the corporate press! So what? The majority of Americans actually voted for Kerry, and will approve of his challenge. Remember, Gore challenged - and actually would have had Bush beat on the recount, had the Supreme Court not stepped in in such an outrageously desperate fashion!

[Is getting Gored worse than being Borked?]

It is very debatable whether or not this country can possibly survive 4 more years of this administration - endless wars, bottomless debt, right-wing Supreme Court justices, the environment destroyed... What are we all waiting for? What are KERRY/EDWARDS waiting for? These are two bright, powerful warriors - and this is THEIR moment in history!! This is OUR moment! Where are we - the alleged "greatest" country on earth, when our precious democracy is being threatened?

[Where are we? Tomorrow sitting around the Thanksgiving table. Then later sitting in front of the tube watching football games and film festivals and wishing we didn’t eat so much turkey and stuffing.]

If Kerry doesn't unconcede, he should be strung up by his toenails.

[Like Mussolini? But to make this image complete wouldn’t we also need to string up Kerry’s mistress by her toenails as well?]

that is the conclusion i just came to today. we are nowhere without Kerry leading.

[Some day my prince will come

Some day we'll meet again

And away to his castle we'll go

To be happy forever I know. ]

He knows it was stolen, he knows what they did and he does nothing. He worries that the media will focus on the 10 dead guys that voted for him illegally and that that will tarnish the party. F*ck the party, I'm sorry, I'm feeling dissed as hell. I feel electorically raped and sodomized.

[Some day when spring is here

We'll find our love anew

And the birds will sing

And wedding bells will ring

Some day when my dreams come true.]



Edwards is the one that said on the "black day of concession" that they (Kerry/Edwards) were going to make sure every vote was counted.

THEY ALSO SAID: "HELP IS ON THE WAY"

NOW I'm really starting to get the blue funk again.

[HELP IS GOING AWAY!]

I feel like I got stabbed in the back. I contributed hundreds of dollars to his campaign - something I've never done before! - & he tells me to work with Bushco? I hope against hope that Kerry is working fervently in the background on the fraud issue, but I have a hard time believing it.

[Perhaps it would make you feel better if you contribute hundreds of dollars more to the Bev Harris Vote Fraud Documentary Movie Fund. As one of the fund donors you will get a 10% ticket discount when this film appears at your local theater.]

I'm disappointed, upset, and pissed off. I don't know what to believe or who to trust.

[Psst! You can trust Bev Harris. Send Bev money for her vote fraud movie project. Give until it hurts….And then give some more.]

Kerry left our backs exposed. It's too late for the back thing. He has 52 million for a recount fund and is NOT SPENDING A DIME of it. This will end his career for sure. I love his stand on issues, but does he stand?

[It’s too late for the back thing but is there still enough time for the tush thing?]

I hate reading this, but thanks for the wakeup call. So what can we do? Email or call him? Reach him through Chris Heinz? Contact him collectively as DU?

[You could try serenading his wind surfing board.]

WE WON'T SURVIVE THIS!

WE MUST FIGHT RIGHT NOW!

JUST LIKE THE BRAVE SOULS IN THE UKRAINE!

WRITE TO KERRY! CALL HIM!! BOMBARD HIM WITH MESSAGES UNTIL HE DOES SOMETHING!

[THE END OF THE WORLD!

RUN IN CIRCLES!

SCREAM AT THE SKY!

SEND E-MAILS INTO THE ETHER!

THROW ROCKS AT THE TV SCREEN! POUND FISTS UPON THE GROUND! SMASH YOUR HEAD INTO BRICK WALLS!]

Maybe we the people need to take this country back. There are how many millions of us, and like what, a thousand of them?

[STORM THE BASTILLE!]

Kerry needs to keep contact. he needs to, in some way, let us know every once in a while that he is still behind the effort. ha, he should start posting on this board!!

[Some day my prince will come

Some day we'll meet again

And away to his castle we'll go

To be happy forever I know. ]

Kerry is way too nuanced for me. Now is not the time to be subtle. Time is running out. Have you read the Bev Harris post today?

[The post where Bev says Kerry needs to be as blatant as a buffalo fart?]

You're like a passenger on the Titanic trying hard not to overreact! Everything's just peachy, huh, CW? That "niggling concern" is only that OUR ENTIRE SHIP IS F*CKING SINKING - AND MANY OF US ARE ABOUT TO PERISH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Calm down. Leonardo DiCrapio perished on the Titanic but was that really a bad thing?]

It Will Be As If The Swifties Were Right that he cuts and runs on us. I don't want to think that!

[Good analogy. Even DUmmies can come up with a good analogy once every millennium or so.]

My Inner Bitch Is Waiting For The Shit To Hit The Fan. Just wait folks.....this is not going quietly into the night....the shit will hit the fan and soon....

[Your inner bitch will still be waiting out in the cold on Jan. 20. Oh, and stay away from fans.]

It's looking a little like the bottom of the ninth with at least one out.

[More like the bottom of the ninth with two outs, two strikes, and the Bush team ahead by a score of 136,000 to 0.]

I keep thinking about the end of Lord of the Rings where they decide to march on the Black Gate as a distraction because Frodo and Sam are already deep within Mordor, near where the One Ring was created...

[So Kerry and Edwards are going to march on the Black Gate as a distraction away from Frodo and Sam? That sounds like a reasonable plan to me!]