Wednesday, February 09, 2005

DUmmie FUnnies 02-09-05 ("Gore-Clark 2008")

The DUmmies have put their collective heads together and came up with the “dream” political ticket for the next presidential election as you can see in this DUmmie THREAD titled, “Gore-Clark 2008.” Okay, this might not be the absolute WORST ticket since Gore-Evil Elf would exceed it as a political disaster but it is close. I am really looking forward to the Gore-Clark 2008 campaign. Already I can envision Gore screeching ala “HE BETRAYED US!!!” while the buttons go popping off his jacket due to his enormous weight gain. As to Clark, it is always fun to count how few times the fired ex-general’s eyes blink. BTW, no way the Clintons would ever permit their puppet, Clark, to run on a ticket with Gore but let the DUmmies dream on. The wild DUmmie political strategizing is in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, looking forward to this 2008 comedy act, is in the [brackets]:

Gore-Clark 2008. Gore has the name recognition and the following, and his Presidency was interrupted by a corrupt Supreme Court. He is owed, besides the fact that he is probably the best political candidate - at the very least one of the very best political candidates - that Democrats have.

[If Algore is the best candidate you have then the Democrats are in worse trouble than I thought.]

General Wesley Clark I can't say enough good things about. He was my clear choice throughout the primaries from start to finish. Unfortunately he has no experience in elected office and not nearly the name recognition or political following that a long-time national figure like Gore has. The Vice-Presidency will give him that experience, which really does matter, and the exposure too. I have no doubt that under Gore he, like Gore under Clinton, would be a highly involved VP and not Quaylish window dressing. I look at VP seasoning as a positive consideration, not an obstacle. For fellow Clark fans, that means 16 years topside instead of just 8, assuming things work out, so not to fret.

[Clark is rumored to have blinked twice in 2004.]

that 's really the ticket I'm hoping to see.

[Me too!]

I like Hillary a lot, but Gore would be a better candidate. I am glad you posted this. I thought I was the only one who hadn't forgotten him.

[Gone but not forgotten. Ah, the fond memories: Space alien orange makeup. Huffing and puffing like a shmuck in the middle of a debate. “No controlling legal authority.” Prosthetic crotch enhancers. Deep throating Tipper in front of millions. “HE BETRAYED US!!!” Yes, bring back Al. So maybe he will come back a few sizes bigger but that will make him even FUNNIER!]

"Party of the People." That should be our theme.

[How original! Let’s see. That theme has been rehashed by the Democrats for every election for about the last 70 years.]

Done. Lets do it! Couldn't be better leaders at a better time.

[Best comedy team ever!]

I'm just afraid that Gore has the "sore loser nutcase" label.

[Really??? Wherever did you get such a strange idea?]

After he "lost" the 2000 election he disappeared, grew the big beard and that's when they started the insanity bullshit. You saw how the corporate media took the clips of his speeches when he was impassioned and played them off like he was nuts. I think Gore might be considered damaged goods.

[Yeah, those “HE BETRAYED US!!!” rantings were altered to just make Gore appear to be nuts when he really delivered the speeches in a calm, deliberate manner.]

Maybe now that Dems finally seem to have woken up about playing nice vs smear politics, we'll smear back. I know I will.

[I know you will smear too. You’ve already had plenty of practice at it.]

Well the policy speeches he gave last year were taken out of context. The media played only the parts where he was very angry and loud and ran them over and over and implied that he was insane.

[Yeah. Gore only APPEARED to be insane when screeching “HE BETRAYED US!!!” What a bum rap.]

Gore gets into that preacher revival voice too much for my taste. He should learn to save it for a few forceful points and moderate it otherwise.

[And cut out a great comedy routine? No way!]

I don't think speeches from five years earlier will have much relevance, but if you're talking about his speaking style in general, then I agree he should probably tone it down a little. Al has kind of a tin ear when it comes to rousing the rabble.

[Thank you for your constructive advice on rabble rousing.]

The perception of him through the media is that of an unhinged person on the verge of madness. I love Gore but my fear is that the media image of him will stick all too well in the minds of the ignorant.

[It’s so unfair. Algore only suffers from the PERCEPTION of him as an unhinged person on the verge of madness when in actual fact he is as sane as Vincent Van Gogh.]

Why all the fantasy threads when BBV means we can't even vote?

[True. Those Diebold voting machines are already preset for the 2008 election to vote for the Fascist Candidate. We own ALL your BBVs (and your BVDs).]

I don't think many Dems or newbies here at DU even know they can't vote anymore. So I see a lot of hoping to get something from Santa when he's been killed and his body stuffed in the chimney.

[True. Since those BBV machines are already preset for 2008, there is NO NEED to vote then. So just stay home on 2008 Election Day.]

Gore kinda brings to mind an certain awkwardness that's easy to like, but harder to respect (in the physical sense, Goofy comes to mind). Strong leader is not what I see before my eyes when I see Gore.

[But Funny is what I see when I see Gore. DEFINITELY funny!]

If Dean can't improve his image with mainstream America, then Gore is definately finished goods, because he endorsed Dean. And they are wedded and tied at the hip.

[I’m trying to figure out what is funnier: the Dean Scream or the Gore Screech?]


Post a Comment

<< Home