Tuesday, February 01, 2005

DUmmie FUnnies 02-01-05 ("What if everyone registered on DU pulled all their assets from the banks?")

DUmmie GoatHead, in an HILARIOUS act of bloated self-importance, pathetically asks if by pulling all their assets from the banks the DUmmies could crash the economic system. Since most of the DUmmie bank accounts in question are Piggy Banks, I doubt the DUmmies would have ANY effect on the economic system. However, at least such delusional speculation provides for some great comedy relief as you can see in this DUmmie THREAD titled, “What if everyone registered on DU pulled all their assets from the banks?” As usual, the wacko DUmmie economic theories are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, waiting and waiting and waiting for the run on the banks, is in the [brackets]:

What if everyone registered on DU pulled all their assets from the banks? 60,000+ people all on the same day divesting themselves of this corrupt system. I think that would have quite an affect on our economic system. Would it trigger a crash?

[I hate to cut off your drool flow at the thought of causing an economic crash, Dummie Goathead, but that dopey plan would have no more chance of crashing the economy than 60,000 DUmmies simultaneously soiling their diapers.]

Why would anyone want to do such a thing?

[Delusional self importance; immaturity; insanity; and helpless rage to name just a few dopey reasons.]

Its easy enough, I suppose, to forget that lots of regular people will be hurt in such a financial firestorm.

[The only people hurt by such an action would be folks walking barefoot on broken DUmmie Piggy Banks.]

lol lol i was thinking the same, and then what do we do with our money

[Shove it where the moon don’t shine. Two cents would easily fit in that crack.]

atleast half have been tombstoned freepers about 20,000 lurkers, 5,000 uncaught freepers and 5,000 True DUers

[That 60,000 figure bandied about by DUmmie Goathead is more overinflated than his swollen head. And I think your 5000 figure for True DUmmies might even be an overestimate.]

I'm not asking why, I'm asking "what if". As in corporatists use their money against the masses why not reverse the situation.

[And I’m asking “what if” you bring your overly medicated brain back to this space-time continuum, DUmmie Goathead.]

look at the L.A. riots after the Rodney King verdict. The catalyst behind that was a "routine" traffic stop. Los Angeles was on fire for days, people were barricading their neighborhoods and standing watch on top of there houses with shotguns.

[Wipe that anticipatory drool from your bib, DUmmie Goathead. Apocalyptic anarchy will NOT happen if you and a handful of your fellow DUmmies smash your Piggy Banks on the floor.]

I believe that you have a huge segment of the population that is disenfranchised by Bush and his policies. What will be the match that ignites this powder keg or will their be one? There is a lot of energy that those on the left are suppressing, a lot of anger and hatred for Bush.

[What will be the match that ignites this powder keg? Most likely you screeching helplessly for a diaper change, DUmmie Goathead.]

Per haps the mere mention of action like this may be the spark that triggers change. Though many would identify it as heresy or even treason.

[How about identifying it as extreme immaturity, DUmmie Goathead?]

What if we all just bounced checks? At least that doesn't require me to go to the bank.

[Yeah. Don’t knock yourself out while futilely trying to bring down the entire economic system.]

sorry to say...but 60,000 out of 200,000,000 is not even a blip on the radar...

[Make that about 3000 out of 200,000,000. The other 57,000 “DUmmies” are either tombstoned Freepers or active LOUSY FREEPER TROLLS.]

Crash? Of the economy? You must be kidding. Most of our assets are not liquid, and those that are, make up a tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny, fraction of the economy.

[Don’t discourage DUmmie Goathead. I want to see him smash his Piggy Bank and then laugh like hell watching him wonder why he wasn’t able to bring about a financial apocalypse.]

All of us combined, along with every extended family member we could muster and all their friends thrown in for good measure probably wouldn't warrant a statistical blip on the nation's true wealth

[All of your DUmmie assets combined don’t amount to a pimple on a pig’s ass.]

It could trigger a "run on the banks"

[You’re drowning in your own drool, DUmmie Goathead.]

So you want to cause a financial panic? You do know who would get screwed on that don't you? Here's a hint...it wouldn't be the rich. As for the LA riots, what did they accomplish beyond destroying their own neighborhoods?

[You’re actually trying to reason with DUmmie Goathead while he is gleefully irrigating his own diaper in happy anticipation of the coming apocalypse?]

They were actually marauding through the streets of several neighborhoods and nearly made it to Beverly Hills. "The rich" were leaving L.A. in droves.

[Unfortunately your anticipatory drool extinguished those riot fires, DUmmie Goathead. So your plan backfired.]

But we did make a difference with Sinclair through the shareholders. That's the only time I think there has been any effect from activism on the left.

[Okay, we’ll give the DUmmies ONE point for getting Sinclair to back down on a broadcast that ended up NOT affecting the election. And then we will give Karl Rove a MILLION points for WINNING the election and a heap of other political battles.]

How about if I pull all my assets out of Wild Bill's Pawn Shop?

[That means Wild Bill will be out one used condom. Or is the correct term, “preowned condom?"]


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